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How to handle sexual desire? (self.MGTOW)

mgtow_throwaway_666 が 投稿

Hi MGTOW, Im a 21 year old virgin. Im currently struggling with masturbation, I masturbate 1-3 times a day and I can't control it, sometimes when Im reading/watching something my mind wanders to sex always. I understand your drive in life comes from your bodies desire to breed, (pretty sure) if you had no dick then you wouldn't even feel like getting up.

Well everytime a masturbate I lose all motivation and feel sluggish, how do you transmute sexual desire into hard work and effort? I feel as if my sexual organs are primitive but my mind is in the modern world. At the moment Im focusing all efforts on becoming a good programmer, I feel as if Im years behind everybody in life, and, well quite frankly Ive been a loser my whole life. Now is time to put the foot to the gas and make a change to the best I can. Everything related to masturbation is becoming a massive procrastination fest and time waste in my life. If I was to somehow get laid, would the itching desire my organs have to get laid subside for a year or so? Would I not be such a thirsty fuck? Is it possible to meditate away this shit, I dont even know how to do that but am willing to read any relevant material. Is it down to simply one thing; discipline? It seems like an overwhelming force in my life which I can't shake. Please help me, I want to remove this vice.

Thank you.

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[–]just8lmao 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (4子コメント)

I can't control it

Unless you've lost cognitive control of your hands I would say you're full of shit. Of course this must be a very ingrained habit of yours if you're saying that.

Bur habits are not unbreakable. Meditation and breaking attachment to pleasure can help you along. Here's a video that explains what I mean in more detail. Literal Monk Mode. Often times the problem is not masturbation but is porn. Setup a parental blocker on your browser. Get someone to make a password for you and leave it alone. Develop constructive hobbies to occupy your time.

At the minimum give it a few days and you'll notice a big change in your mindset. Idk about you but when I would overdo it I felt absolutely like shit, which is probably due to the dopamine insensitivity from using the receptors so much coupled with the hormonal disruption.

Learn that pain/discomfort is a good thing. It goes against the cult of instant gratification we live in. We are too coddled in the modern world. Even as men.

[–]UtopianKing 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (2子コメント)

Unless you've lost cognitive control of your hands I would say you're full of shit. Of course this must be a very ingrained habit of yours if you're saying that.

Addiction, man..

[–]just8lmao 2 ポイント3 ポイント  (1子コメント)

I see addiction for what it is: a very strong association between an act and the pleasure it creates in the mind/body that becomes so habitual that it becomes a mindless process. In reality there is no such thing as addiction or addicts, but people who are not paying attention doing things on autopilot.

[–]UtopianKing 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (1子コメント)

Keep yourself busy, workout. Or you could use what women use to control us with. Reward yourself with a wank. When you have actually accomplished something, jerk off.. then next time demand yourself a little more..

The important thing is that you realize that you have a problem. Like you've done making this thread.

If you are at a gym, you won't wank, you go to the movies, you won't wank.. public places, go for walks, listen to audiobooks.

About 5 days if you can make it, it becomes easier. BUT DO NOT TEMPT YOURSELF, like going to a porn site just to look, you will relapse, if you do then accept it and start over.

One thing is to fap like 7654434 times in a row, though this leads to depressive thoughts and that's kinda the key, it feels so awful that you associate that feeling to fapping. Like you have already noticed that your fapping is a problem.

Biologically speaking: you have already been rewarded so there's no need to have motivation to do anything. Male does the things he does to attract females, once that has been accomplished, there no need to do anything else (until of course the female starts nagging etc)

[–]UtopianKing 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Also I avoid sexual themes and pictures of women all together, I don't watch TV, socialize online where women try to be seductive. I go out for walks and listen to sandman, tfm, howard dare or audiobooks. Since I hear only the mgtow content, those pictures of pretty ladies won't affect me.

Once you get the taste of the power you have within, you don't want to discharge it. And once you realize that fapping does just that, you'll start to avoid it.

Okay here's something that might be tricky to grasp, but next time you get the urge, try locate its exact location in your body, where its boundaries are, where does that feeling stop. Then once your concentration is on it, try to let it spread to your entire body or your head. You might become to realize that it actually is a tension you are holding, relax it, let that energy flow free in your body.

[–]bonusfruit 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Never could completely give it up. And it is likely to last all thru your 20s if you are a healthy male. Harsh reality. I find one good wank every 3 to 4 days is enough to keep energy and focus without being too pent up