Ok, this might be a little long, I might even push like, 1,000 words. Sorry, bros.
I recently got out of a LTR and was feeling sort of insecure and nervous about getting back into the dating scene. I'm handsome, tall, strong, I dress well and I'm successful at my career. What was there to be nervous about, right? By all accounts, I'm Alpha af.
In addition to running my own successful small business, I've bar tended for a long time. As my business has picked up over the years, I've tapered down my bar tending to just once a week, and now it's mostly a social outlet and a way to make some pocket money.
Needless to say, I know how to be at a bar. I know how to talk to people at a bar. I know how to schmooze a free drink or shot here and there from a bar tender, male or female. I'm a Chad and I fucking speak the language.
I have this lingering problem, though. I respect women. Fuck, I respect people in general. I treat women, first and foremost, like people. I hope I haven't lost you yet. I'll get to the juicy part soon.
So I'm sitting in my local one night, and in walks a bar tender for her shift. I recognize her. I've met her through a mutual friend. I would rate her on a 1-10 SMV scale for you, but everyone's tastes are different, amiright? I think she's got a nice combination of cute and sexy. What do I do? I fucking say, "Hey, I've met you before, haven't I?"
She hesitates, and then says, "Yea, I thought I recognized you, you're Stacey's friend, right?"
We start talking. I get a little drunk and I buy her shots and I tip well. I then go home, because I wanted to smoke weed and watch Seinfeld. I told her as much. Maybe she appreciated the candor.
Flash forward a couple of weeks during which I mostly do me. I masturbate when the mood strikes me, I exercise at my own leisure, and I fucking chill out because I'm a grown-ass man that doesn't need to womanize to prove my self-worth.
I'd done that same routine at the bar here and there, developing a rapport with [let's call her] Tanya, getting to know her, listening to her when she speaks, and trying to be thoughtful in my responses, showing a LOT of interest. I tell her I want to sit on the same side of the bar with her sometime, and I get her number.
Flash forward another week of sporadic texting, where Tanya takes half a day to respond and I respond right away because I don't give a fuck about text-game, and eventually I ask her on a date.
We go on a date. We get coffee and talk. I'm struck by how petite she is, it's hard to tell sometimes when someone's behind a bar and you're sitting down, also when their body isn't the only thing you're looking at. I drop her off at work and kiss her on the fucking cheek, bros. And I liked it. I thought she smelled nice.
I'm a busy person and so is she, so it takes another whole week and a half before I see her again. I showed up at the end of her shift at the bar, and then she sat down next to me after she had counted out, and we talked and drank for hours. We talked about our exes, and the way those relationships made us feel. I made her laugh, she made me laugh. I thought to myself, I would like to have sex with this woman at some point.
After another week, I asked her on a formal date, where we went out to eat and made a bunch of eye contact and shit. My meal was fucking good, too. I asked her if she wanted to come to my place and crack open a nice bottle of wine I had gotten for the holidays. She declined, saying she was supposed to meet a friend that evening, something she had mentioned before, and I totally fucking respected that. I maintained my frame, though. I walked her most of the way to where she was going and then I laid one on her as we parted ways. We totally frenched.
Ok, this is where this shit gets crazy. It's winter, a time when the weather is usually pretty shitty, but on this certain day, IT WAS NICE OUT. The sun was shining and the birds were chirping and probably mad confused and I texted Tanya saying "God it's beautiful out. What are you doing? Want to go for a stroll?" She responded quickly saying, "Yea that sounds nice, I'm actually about to walk to the bank." This is when I knew I could potentially parlay this into another date (banking can be sexy). So I bought her dinner, again. Again, it was delicious and overall it was a nice time where I got to know her a little more. This time when I asked her about the wine at my crib, she agreed.
We went back to my place, and I put on some music and opened the wine. We got kinda saucy and then smoked a doobie and then after a makeout sesh I began to undress her. We had sex and it was chill. I'm not sure I made her orgasm, though, because I don't like, know her spots yet or anything. She slept over and I made her peanut butter and banana toast in the morning. I think I like her and I sure hope she consents to having sex with me again.
End Field Report.
tl;dr
Over the course of about a month I was respectful and nice to a woman I was attracted to, took her on a few dates, eventually had pretty good sex. I think I like her.
ここには何もないようです