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[–]NapalmenatorQuality Contributor[M] [スコア非表示] stickied comment (0子コメント)

Useful conversation has dried up. If you would like to continue talking about crazy roommates please move to /r/legaladviceofftopic


[–]rhomboidus 494 ポイント495 ポイント  (135子コメント)

Point her to the nearest soup kitchen.

[–]Throwaway826228[S] 136 ポイント137 ポイント  (134子コメント)

About 10 miles away and she can't drive. Boo hoo.

[–]-CyberGhost- 159 ポイント160 ポイント  (125子コメント)

She can take the bus.

[–]Throwaway826228[S] 90 ポイント91 ポイント  (124子コメント)

There's no bus. She'd have to walk.

[–]peepwizard 237 ポイント238 ポイント  (120子コメント)

A healthy adult can easily walk 10 miles.

[–]Throwaway826228[S] 138 ポイント139 ポイント  (50子コメント)

She can't, she bitches about the cold too. Welcome to North Dakota, I'm not your chauffeur..

[–]peepwizard 239 ポイント240 ポイント  (48子コメント)

Sound like you're the one making excuses for her...

[–]NoWittyUsernamesLeft 263 ポイント264 ポイント  (6子コメント)

It sounds like /u/throwaway826228 is just repeating their excuses. They sarcastically said boo hoo and referred to their complaint as bitching.

[–]jonnyp11 92 ポイント93 ポイント  (2子コメント)

He explains in a long ass chain that he doesn't consider it safe to walk 10 miles, in the dark, at -11F. Honestly, I wouldn't disagree that she can't/shouldn't try that. But, as others pointed out, she can be hungry tonight, then go walk it tomorrow afternoon, which OP was being a little sense about

[–]NoWittyUsernamesLeft 9 ポイント10 ポイント  (1子コメント)

Ah alright. You know how it goes, you sometimes miss chains of comments. Carry on then!

[–]Throwaway826228[S] 28 ポイント29 ポイント  (2子コメント)

I'm just trying to get people to realize where we are there's no bus service or taxis.

[–]xHeero 22 ポイント23 ポイント  (0子コメント)

A human being can survive weeks without eating food as long as they have access to clean water.

[–]CallingYouOut2 76 ポイント77 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Sounds like $100 a month I could fucking live without!

[–]CueBreaker 13 ポイント14 ポイント  (0子コメント)

I think this is a useful dialogue though. OP needs to have this discussion to arm himself for arguing with the crazy lady.

[–]Throwaway826228[S] 27 ポイント28 ポイント  (34子コメント)

How is say that I'm not her chauffeur making excuses for her?

[–]onomonopeeyah 92 ポイント93 ポイント  (32子コメント)

Because every time someone says "tell her to go to a food bank" or "she can take the bus" or "tell her to walk" you're like "but.. but she can't..."

The bottom line is: you aren't obligated to feed her. Tell her to figure her shit out. Lock your food up if you have to.

Or you could feed her. It's up to you.

[–]Throwaway826228[S] 44 ポイント45 ポイント  (30子コメント)

I said she can walk. There's no buses here and we're 10miles from town, that's not an excuse that's the truth.

[–]fuzio 5 ポイント6 ポイント  (0子コメント)

She can. She chooses not to

[–]JustF-nGo 51 ポイント52 ポイント  (30子コメント)

Idk if you've ever walked 10 miles, but its not easy and I'm more than physically fit. Doable? Yes. Easy? Try it and let me know.

Edit before more morons disagree: average human walking speed is 3.1 mph. That means if you were able to keep up that average pace the whole time, you'd finish 10 miles in 3h13m48s. Walking 10 miles could burn 650-1000+ calories depending on your weight. It's not easy to walk 10 miles, plain and simple. I am not defending the fact that this person is horrible at financial planning and doesn't deserve handouts, but I have to correct something as incorrect as this, especially with all the upvotes it's getting.

[–]ElolvastamEzt 44 ポイント45 ポイント  (2子コメント)

Everyone seems to be forgetting that she also has to walk home again, so 20 miles and 7 hours of walking.

[–]fire_water76 11 ポイント12 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Fuck that id rather stay hungry

[–]JustF-nGo 10 ポイント11 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Right?! And she's doing this hungry!

[–]anumati 8 ポイント9 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Although, it would take about 3 hours one way.

[–]KnowsAboutMath 3 ポイント4 ポイント  (2子コメント)

Can't drive, no bus.

How does she ever get anywhere?

[–]Throwaway826228[S] 5 ポイント6 ポイント  (1子コメント)

She catches a ride into with me or with one of our neighbors.

[–]DayMan4224 5 ポイント6 ポイント  (0子コメント)

She needs to learn how to be an adult

[–]TheCatGuardian 172 ポイント173 ポイント  (10子コメント)

She demanding that I give her some of my dinner(after calling it gross)

Is your roommate actually your toddler? If no, then no. They can manage their own life.

[–]Throwaway826228[S] 220 ポイント221 ポイント  (8子コメント)

I'm beginning to suspect that she's a stray cat in a human suit.

[–]WynnDuffysEyebrows 80 ポイント81 ポイント  (3子コメント)

Roll up a ball of aluminum foil and throw it in her direction. That ought to keep her busy for a little while.

[–]kemahaney 17 ポイント18 ポイント  (2子コメント)

Or a laser pointer - great entertainment with cats.

[–]DayMan4224 4 ポイント5 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Yarn works wonders as well

[–]Swedishpunsch 17 ポイント18 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Beware of that one - they're usually knocked up.

[–]erfling 14 ポイント15 ポイント  (0子コメント)

You have been subscribed to roommate facts.

[–]rachelll 10 ポイント11 ポイント  (1子コメント)

Pretty sure my old stray cat was more independent than your roomate. He was very good at hunting and would bring us his gifts.

[–]Throwaway826228[S] 11 ポイント12 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Probably smelled better too.

[–]vault_dweller1031 8 ポイント9 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Plot twist: This is just a cleverly worded post about a deadbeat trying to get out of child support.

[–]Tyr_Tyr 260 ポイント261 ポイント  (60子コメント)

A human rights violation? That's a new one.

Time to give her a 30 day notice, because this shit is only going to get worse.

And you have zero legal obligation to provide her food.

[–]TYFPBc6Zp8xS 27 ポイント28 ポイント  (14子コメント)

Sadly, I've seen at least one other post with a similar situation where the "wronged" party claimed it was a human rights violation.

[–]lucysalvatierra 44 ポイント45 ポイント  (13子コメント)

I remember that: their neighbor wanted some of their food, not even a roommate. Where do these people get this idea?

[–]WilNotJr 30 ポイント31 ポイント  (7子コメント)

It's the same people who steal other's lunches from the fridge at work. No idea where they get the idea but they definitely feel they are entitled to food when they want it.

[–]Barbed_Dildo 21 ポイント22 ポイント  (4子コメント)

It usually comes from 'they get paid more than me', 'I need it more than them'...

And then there's the 'Oh hey, is this food anybody's?' said to an empty breakroom while holding a container clearly labelled 'Janet'.

Nobody said anything, I thought I could...

[–]flamedarkfire 11 ポイント12 ポイント  (0子コメント)

There was also the one OP who came into some money and their mother was going to sue them based on their sister had "the greatest need" of said money.

[–]KoperKat 8 ポイント9 ポイント  (1子コメント)

To be fair, Janet from accounting is a bitch...

Brave is the soul that steals her lunch from the break room.

[–]Barbed_Dildo 6 ポイント7 ポイント  (0子コメント)

No, you're thinking of Janice

[–]SaxPanther 3 ポイント4 ポイント  (0子コメント)

omg remember that post where OP's mom was like "yeah I'm gonna legally steal all your life savings because your sister needs it more than you"

[–]BushKush273 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (0子コメント)

I only ever guiltily steal peoples ketchup.. I'm sorry guys. I feel awful afterwards but sometimes ketchup is needed.

[–]BUBBLYSTRING 6 ポイント7 ポイント  (4子コメント)

Was it the one where the neighbors thought the OP would have to share the food in their shelter, and possibly the shelter itself, if a hurricane came through and so refused to prepare themselves?

[–]_ilovetofu_ 3 ポイント4 ポイント  (0子コメント)

I remember one being about a farmer with corn I think

[–]VAPossum 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (0子コメント)

I would love to see that thread.

[–]lucysalvatierra 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (1子コメント)

Thats the one I was thinking of. Why do they always says it's a human rights abuse?

[–]gyroda 2 ポイント3 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Iirc there's a right to food in some human rights conventions. I'm no expert and this obviously changes around the world, but from what I understand:

Usually it means things like the government not being allowed to deny you suitable (allergies and intolerances, maybe religious/ethical reasons) food if you are imprisoned or at school or otherwise in government care. Another thing this might cover is that your employer must make it reasonable for you to be able to eat your lunch (e.g, they can't give you a half hour lunch break but ban food on the premises and reprimand you for leaving the premises).

If the landlord had forbidden the tenant having food on the premises they might be on to something but I've no real idea. Not giving you food is an entirely different point.

TL;DR right to food means you must have reasonable access to food.

[–]Throwaway826228[S] 39 ポイント40 ポイント  (41子コメント)

Do I need anything from a lawyer or judge? Can I just write something myself?

[–]WynnDuffysEyebrows 77 ポイント78 ポイント  (32子コメント)

If she is a month to month tenant, you only have to give her written notice to vacate within 30 days.

[–]Throwaway826228[S] 38 ポイント39 ポイント  (31子コメント)

Years lease.

[–]WynnDuffysEyebrows 105 ポイント106 ポイント  (26子コメント)

Then you are stuck with her. You can't evict her for being annoying.

[–]CrackaAssCracka 42 ポイント43 ポイント  (1子コメント)

Perhaps OP could put some food in a bowl, in front of someone else's house. With any luck, the tenant will eat the food, then think the other house is where she lives.

[–]Lehk 15 ポイント16 ポイント  (0子コメント)

I should charge my cats rent.

[–]Aleore 13 ポイント14 ポイント  (20子コメント)

If she gets bad enough that he wants her gone how bad would it be if OP broke the lease

[–]WynnDuffysEyebrows 31 ポイント32 ポイント  (19子コメント)

If he illegally evicted her, he would be financially liable for damages she incurred as a result.

[–]Aleore 5 ポイント6 ポイント  (18子コメント)

What can OP do to get rid of her if she becomes a big enough pain in the ass

[–]sirspidermonkey 23 ポイント24 ポイント  (5子コメント)

Typically in that situation you try and do a cash for keys.

Evictions can get expensive. Say you'll give them a few grand to move out. That covers their first, last and moving. They may even make a profit.

[–]Strawsonian 12 ポイント13 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Typically in that situation you try and do a cash for keys.

This is the correct answer. Make sure you get it in writing.

[–]WeylandTheDwarf 2 ポイント3 ポイント  (3子コメント)

Is there any way a judge could determine the decision was made under duress or something if she hasn't eaten in a few days prior to that offer?

[–]WynnDuffysEyebrows 27 ポイント28 ポイント  (9子コメント)

Nothing unless she violates the lease. They entered into a binding contract. Them's the breaks.

[–]Darkfriend337 9 ポイント10 ポイント  (1子コメント)

Not quite. OP can offer the gal money to leave, as an example. OP can't force the gal to leave though.

[–]TROLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL0 7 ポイント8 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Pay her to end the lease early.

[–]jupitaur9 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Stop feeding her.

[–]smashedon 7 ポイント8 ポイント  (0子コメント)

IANAL but I know in my own jurisdiction it's important to start the eviction process the day rent is due if it's not paid on time. I would look into the local laws in ND which are probably more in your favour than here in Ontario and go get yourself the correct documents from whatever agency is responsible (here it's the landlord tenant board). If you delay the process on day one and say wait out the month for her to pay, you're prolonging the amount of time it will take to evict her and thus prolonging the amount of time she isn't paying rent. Another note is that in many jurisdictions if she's late for rent multiple times, you can evict on that basis even if she always eventually pays. So each time you file for eviction it's noted and that documentation can be used to follow through on an eviction later on. Usually there is a cut off like 14 days where if you file for eviction and they pay, the eviction is halted. So while on its face it may seem like a waste of time, if it happens 3,4,5 times, it will be worth having done it in the past because then you can get her out even if she pays rent eventually.

TL;DR if she fails to pay, start the eviction process within 24 hours. Even if she eventually pays, being habitually past due is usually cause for eviction which you can use if you need to in the event that she's also being horrible to live with.

[–]tarekd19 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (0子コメント)

OP could offer to pay them off to get them off the lease early while there's still leverage. Give her $100 with an agreement to end the lease in 30 days and she gets to eat until she gets paid.

[–]FlyingBasset 24 ポイント25 ポイント  (0子コメント)

1) Never rent a room for $100 a month

2) Always vet someone before they move in, especially before they sign a one year lease.

[–]pernicat 13 ポイント14 ポイント  (0子コメント)

A year lease for a $100 a month room rental? This is why you always do month to month when you have a shared house.

[–]kosmickoyote 3 ポイント4 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Wait until she can't pay

[–]TabbyCaterpillar 4 ポイント5 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Offer her a month's rent in cash if she leaves. Change the locks immediately (if you are also a tenant make sure to notify your landlord and give them the original key to the new lock, make a copy for yourself). Find a new tenant.

[–]Tyr_Tyr 10 ポイント11 ポイント  (7子コメント)

No special requirements.

You can just provide a written notice (keep a copy) which states that you are giving her 30 days notice.

That is if she is a month-to-month renter. If she has a lease, then it's a different thing.

[–]Throwaway826228[S] 9 ポイント10 ポイント  (6子コメント)

What do I do since she has years lease?

[–]Tyr_Tyr 39 ポイント40 ポイント  (4子コメント)

You can say no.

But unless she violates the lease (and no, whining doesn't count) you are stuck with her until the end of the lease.

[–]Throwaway826228[S] 28 ポイント29 ポイント  (3子コメント)

At least she won't touch my food, she can't cook.

[–]Tyr_Tyr 26 ポイント27 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Sounds like a winner.

[–]DayMan4224 4 ポイント5 ポイント  (1子コメント)

How old is this lady? She seems to have no independence at all

[–]NewSpaghettiMonster 4 ポイント5 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Offer her money to move out (willingly agreeing to end the lease).

[–]kemahaney 66 ポイント67 ポイント  (3子コメント)

  1. That is dirt cheap for a room 2. She needs to learn to spend her money wisely and not on makeup. I have a few on my Facebook feed that blow money on crap and in next breath are crying poverty and wanting a GoFundme for Christmas presents.

[–]TheGuestResponds 7 ポイント8 ポイント  (2子コメント)

Word! $100 would get you a camping spot for a day around here

[–]kemahaney 3 ポイント4 ポイント  (1子コメント)

That would maybe get her my walk in closet maybe but that closet is the size of a small room.

[–]DayMan4224 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (0子コメント)

That would get me a shack or a cot and a sleeping bag where I live

[–]appleciders 75 ポイント76 ポイント  (0子コメント)

I've always been partial to "I ain't your mama. Do it yourself."

In most states, a person renting a room in your house is not a tenant but a boarder or lodger. They're much, much easier to boot out of your house.

And if she's having trouble finding food money, she will shortly have trouble finding rent money.

[–]BlatantConservative 30 ポイント31 ポイント  (4子コメント)

Just ignore her.

Tell her to sell her stuff on Ebay.

[–]really-i-care 40 ポイント41 ポイント  (2子コメント)

But to remember to keep records and to pay taxes as necessary!

[–]masterxc 18 ポイント19 ポイント  (1子コメント)

So meta.

[–]really-i-care 10 ポイント11 ポイント  (0子コメント)

I'm just glad someone got it.

[–]NothappyJane 8 ポイント9 ポイント  (0子コメント)

She could sell it in a make up specific facebook group, there is a big market for premium makeup.

Fuck that is ridiculous though, spending all your money and expecting your roomie to bail you out.

[–]enigmaticwanderer 30 ポイント31 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Tell her to donate blood/plasma and ask for snacks beforehand. They might oblige.

[–]Betsy514 24 ポイント25 ポイント  (1子コメント)

Wasn't there a post a few months back where another OP had a neighbor claiming human rights violations for not sharing the vegetables from her garden?

[–]VAPossum 4 ポイント5 ポイント  (0子コメント)

I want to read that thread!

[–]anonymousforever 44 ポイント45 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Show her another copy of the lease. Nowhere in it does it say you are obligated to feed her. that lease is the only thing that matters.

She's not legally disabled, handicapped, elderly (65+), declared incompetent and/or a ward of the court, or otherwise unable to be responsible for herself, right? You are not responsible for rescuing her from her bad financial choices. If she can't budget her money for "necessities" and leave some for "non-essentials" like... umm... food, hygiene items and transportation needs... that's her problem. She's an adult, you aren't her caretaker, financial manager or babysitter. You aren't responsible for her financial well-being.... so... she made the bed... now she's got to sleep in it!

My suggestion - tell her you'll report her to whatever local agency is in your area for at-risk adults, if she continues to try to make her personal problems your problem. You will have the appropriate agency take action to see if she belongs in a home with appropriate supervision, if this is the case.

You'll ask for help for her from an outside source... that's it. You are not personally obligated to care for her in any way, she is just a tenant, period. The idea is to make it not a personal thing, you're just her landlord, not her best buddy.

[–]DoItForTheBJ 17 ポイント18 ポイント  (0子コメント)

I'm laughing so hard at this. "It's a human rights violation for you not to give me what I want." try this at a restaurant and they'll laugh harder than I did.

[–]DrWho1970 16 ポイント17 ポイント  (0子コメント)

You have no legal obligation to feed her. Does she have any credit cards that are not maxed out? It sounds like she is going to default on rent in the next few months and then you can serve a 3 day notice to pay or quite.

[–]NoWittyUsernamesLeft 16 ポイント17 ポイント  (23子コメント)

Hey OP I'm in a similar situation, sort of. My roommate is not an ass, just broke.

My solution was rice, beans and potatoes. If you're feeling really generous, food like eggs cheese and bread too. If you value keeping the peace and you want to alleviate any guilt you may have about her going hungry when you can help, then these foods are a great idea.

Rice beans and potatoes are not fun food but you can survive on then. In addition they also have to be prepared, so you know if they start whining then they aren't really hungry, they just want a free chef.

As a bonus, rice beans (dried!) and potatoes are incredibly cheap.

[–]Throwaway826228[S] 13 ポイント14 ポイント  (14子コメント)

She can't cook and refuse to learn.

[–]NerdCrush 31 ポイント32 ポイント  (0子コメント)

That sounds like her problem.

[–]PageFault 4 ポイント5 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Here is a recipe for Nutriloaf

Healthy, nutritious, and she will never want to eat it again. She will find a way to feed herself.

Look up a video on you-tube if you never heard of it.

[–]DalekCaanEXTERMINATE 2 ポイント3 ポイント  (4子コメント)

How about you have a frank talk about budgeting over dinner? You don't actually have to feed her, but this is a moral thing much more than a legal one.

Some people can't do well in the world by themselves, people should give each other a hand.

[–]Throwaway826228[S] 13 ポイント14 ポイント  (3子コメント)

No, I'd do that if she was an 18 or 19 year old out on her own for the first time but she's a 30 year old grown ass woman.

[–]paulacaley 2 ポイント3 ポイント  (0子コメント)

  1. I'm (sincerely) touched by your hypothetical kindness to a young person who wasn't taught to survive on their own

  2. Holy shit, she's 30??? And doesn't know better than to spend all of her money on makeup, especially before buying food? How did she even get this far?

  3. NAL, and if this would be setting an enforceable precedent or something then I would love to be informed by a lawyer, but the next time she asks for some of your food, tell her that on Monday, you'd be willing to drive her to the store so she can buy a big bag of rice/potatos and maybe some canned fruit/veggies so that she doesn't get horribly constipated when she inevitably fucks up and has to live on just that for the second half of her pay period. I know you said she can't cook and refuses to learn, but rice is very easy to make and you can make a baked potato in the microwave, so if she starts demanding that you cook her potatos and rice, you can tell her to just google it and that it requires no skill.

  4. Is she out of money like $0 in her bank account? or more like $10 in her bank account? If it's the latter and there's a dollar store within comfortable driving distance, consider offering to drive her to the dollar store so she can pick up canned veggies etc to last her through payday. $10 will go a very long way there.

  5. "Listen. I know you're in a tough situation right now in terms of food, and that sucks. However, I work hard to budget so I'll be able to eat comfortably even at the end of the pay period, and the fact that you didn't and are now leaning on me to feed you, to such an extent that I'm going to have to really stretch the budget that I worked hard to stick to, is very frustrating. I know that you can afford to feed yourself on the amount you make because if you couldn't have afforded to both pay rent and feed yourself, I wouldn't have rented to you. If you're having trouble buying food, it's a problem with your budget priorities. You should be putting food and rent first. On Monday, I'd be willing to drive you to the store so that you can buy some cheap staple foods with a long shelf life to tide you over until payday if this happens again. However, I'm not legally obligated to share food with you or help you get to the store to buy food, so this would be me doing you a favor to help you avoid screwing yourself again. How you spend your money is your choice, and if you want to spend it all on makeup, that's your right, but it's not my responsibility to spend my money on you if you spent your money unwisely." Then if she fucks up and complains again, you can tell her that you already did her a favor in helping her get food and told her that you weren't gong to bail her out again.

[–]DayMan4224 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (0子コメント)

I could bake and cook at age 10, how useless are people?!

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    [–]PM_me_goat_gifs 3 ポイント4 ポイント  (7子コメント)

    You can make rice in a microwave:

    4 parts rice

    5 parts water

    10 min on high (might be 20 in the US)

    [–]dangderr 20 ポイント21 ポイント  (4子コメント)

    10 min on high (might be 20 in the US)

    Yeah, we don't use metric minutes here, so our imperial minutes are probably only half as long as whatever you guys use.

    [–]Teddy_Bilgewater 4 ポイント5 ポイント  (2子コメント)

    Probably has more to do with 110v vs 220v electrical supply, though I don't know if that makes a difference in the microwave's output. I.e. 1100w is 1100w regardless.

    [–]liontamarin 2 ポイント3 ポイント  (0子コメント)

    It doesn't change the output.

    [–]dangderr 4 ポイント5 ポイント  (0子コメント)

    Or it could have been commentary on how the serving sizes in America are much larger and would require twice as long to cook.

    [–]Lost4468 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (1子コメント)

    10 min on high (might be 20 in the US)


    [–]s-dubya 17 ポイント18 ポイント  (1子コメント)

    Where did she buy the clothes? She could return some of those and buy food...

    [–]Throwaway826228[S] 39 ポイント40 ポイント  (0子コメント)

    Amazon I believe. She'd never return them they're "necessities"... but foods apparently not. No wonder she always rents rooms she'd die by herself.

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    [–]JJBeans_1 6 ポイント7 ポイント  (5子コメント)

    Why is the rent for her so low? Are you doing her a favor? If yes, that might be part of the reason she feels entitled to your food. People are weird, sometimes.

    [–]Throwaway826228[S] 10 ポイント11 ポイント  (2子コメント)

    She's a friend of a friends half-sister. The room would be empty and the $100 more than covers the extra power and water.

    [–]VAPossum 5 ポイント6 ポイント  (1子コメント)

    You're a kind person. I like you.

    [–]Cinaface 6 ポイント7 ポイント  (1子コメント)

    It could just be property values are low in their part of North Dakota. (I typed from my $250/month 2 bedroom house in rural Nebraska)

    [–]Afswyn 5 ポイント6 ポイント  (0子コメント)

    You want to cover your ass, but you also want her to shape up or ship out. Preferably both, but in this case, I'd imagine either one might work. I'm not a lawyer, so maybe this is good advice, maybe it's not so good advice. If anyone can double-check this, that'd be awesome.

    First, ask her what her pay schedule is (the 1st and 15th of each month?), and roughly how much she gets paid. Then have her sign an addendum to her lease, something like....

    ADDENDUM TO LEASE: Landlord will provide food for Tenant UNTIL [the date that's a day after or so her next payday, so she knows she'll be able to make it until she can buy her own] and transportation to the grocery store at Landlord's convenience thereafter. Tenant may or may not be required to pay a reasonable amount for gas in exchange for said transportation, at Landlord's sole discretion.

    IN RETURN, Tenant is REQUIRED to purchase their own food and other consumable amenities (including but not limited to toiletries) and otherwise pay for their own personal expenses in perpetuity thereafter. AT NO TIME shall the Landlord be required to provide Tenant with food or other consumable amenities or fund Tenant's personal expenses after [the date previously mentioned] or prepare Tenant's food or clean up after Tenant.

    Tenant HEREBY RECOGNIZES that their diet, self-care, and duty to maintain cleanliness of themselves and their environment, to the extent that they caused the mess, in a prompt and efficient manner is both required and entirely their own responsibility and NOT Landlord's responsibility in any way, shape, or form. Landlord reserves the right, at their sole discretion, to enforce reasonable standards of cleanliness.

    Tenant HEREBY RECOGNIZES that ALL current and future personal expenses, whether daily necessities or otherwise, including transportation and cleaning supplies, that are not specifically outlined in the Lease, are Tenant's SOLE RESPONSIBILITY, and agrees that Landlord has no obligation whatsoever to provide these for Tenant. If Landlord DOES provide them, it is only as a courtesy, and is at Landlord's SOLE DISCRETION and may not be construed to form a continuance commitment in any way, shape, or form. Landlord reserves the right to revoke use and access to such kinds of consumable/exhaustible amenities owned by Landlord at any time, with or without cause.

    Tenant HEREBY RECOGNIZES that harassment of Landlord is also prohibited, effective immediately. Tenant is also prohibited from destruction of Landlord's belongings and property. Tenant agrees to be civil with Landlord.

    Tenant HEREBY RECOGNIZES that this Addendum outlines REASONABLE, COMMON-SENSE STANDARDS for adult behavior and self-sufficiency, and does not in any way, shape, or form, constitute an UNDUE BURDEN on Tenant. Tenant agrees to hold Landlord harmless from any damages, real or imagined, that result from Tenant's failure to care for and generally be responsible for themselves, including but not limited to budgeting their own finances properly. Tenant agrees to take all responsibility for their own actions and inactions, and all the consequences thereof, and behave in a manner generally accepted as socially acceptable by common definitions of the term.

    IN RETURN, Landlord promises to be reasonable and fair in enforcement of these terms, and to make a good faith effort to remain civil, to the extent that Tenant is civil and behaving in accordance with the above terms, and according to the current situation/circumstances.

    Tenant FURTHER RECOGNIZES that Landlord may apply, at their sole discretion, penalties for not adhering to said standards and/or not adhering to said standards in a reasonable timeframe, which may consist of fines up to $X per incident or expenses incurred plus $X, payable immediately, AND/OR termination of the Lease and immediate eviction after X willful infractions, at Landlord's sole discretion and without penalty to Landlord. Landlord reserves the right to mitigate their own damages in all circumstances and situations that may arise.

    ...And then spaces for each of you to sign and date.

    And then not feed her ANY of your food until she signs it.

    I know that contracts must have consideration, or benefit to both parties, not just obligations with consequences for only one of the two parties, while benefiting the other... hence making the "free food for now" part of it. HOWEVER, this doesn't state what the free food must be, or how much. Keep serving her rice and beans or instant ramen, if you want, just so she won't starve. And it stipulates that you'll be reasonable yourself, and not harass her, if she doesn't start shit first. (Which is just common sense anyway, right?)

    This would cover a few bases:

    1. She's explicitly responsible for her own damn food. AND for preparing it. (Even if that means microwaving TV dinners.)

    2. She's responsible for her own damn toiletries (she cannot run you out of toilet paper... or shampoo, for example, not that it sounds likely that she'd have done so on her own before! Or at least, it's on her to get more, if she does. Because you don't have to provide it, if you don't want to.)

    3. She can't even say she expects free paper towels or cleaning supplies. Bitch wants to use them, she can buy her own if you're not feeling generous that day.

    4. She has to shower! Note that the middle bit specifically mentions self care and self-cleanliness in a prompt manner. You can even FINE her for not showering for a week, if she reeks.

    5. She even has to do her own damn dishes! And not leave the kitchen/bathroom/living room a wreck, if she messed it up!

    6. Sure, you'll have to take her to the grocery store... at your convenience. And you can even make her pitch in for gas, if you take her. And if you don't take her, she has to find her own damn ride!

    7. She's not allowed to make your life hell or wreck your shit in retribution. She has to be civil.

    8. If she DOES wreck your shit, you can make her pay for the items right then and there.

    9. She can't even claim she's entitled to anything consumable, just because you gave her some before. If you're in a good mood and want to share your leftovers/that cake you brought home that's too much for you to eat yourself, you can totally do that, and she'll have no expectation that it isn't a one-off thing. You're not on the hook to keep providing it.

    Perhaps the best aspects, imho: 10. She agrees that all of this constitutes REASONABLE STANDARDS FOR ADULT BEHAVIOR, and

    1. If she doesn't behave like a reasonable adult, you can fine her... and/or evict her, when she exhausts all her chances by trying your patience!

    2. The only thing you really owe her is a "good faith" effort to be civil (if SHE is!) and fair. Like you already are.

    There's a reason for the word "willful" at the end of it: Because a judge probably wouldn't hold that leaving a couple dishes in the sink overnight (even for two or three days straight) is grounds for eviction, even if it happens ten times. (Or that you're being reasonable in saying she's racked up $50 in fines, by leaving a used mug out on the coffee table, so be careful with your fines.) People can be forgetful, space things out, lose track of the time, etc. Accidents happen! ....However, if she loses her mind and decides to take her frustrations over her inability to budget out on you by breaking your dishes, throwing them on the floor and all, count each dish, and you can kick her out without penalty. (Well, you can evict her. Immediately kicking her to the curb wouldn't be in the cards.) And the bit about mitigating your own damages? If she does start smashing your dishes, you can take the dishes away. If she starts abusing anything, you can take it away.

    I don't expect her to rise to Crazypants level, since it seems from your comments that her problem is just general laziness and entitlement and irresponsibility, and mostly a lack of sensible budgeting... but CYA. You never know... you know?

    Bonus: as it's an addendum to the lease, its terms will survive not only the length of the lease, but should also extend into the month-to-month version, if the lease converts to one after. Because who knows, maybe she will grow a brain and turn into a tenant you don't mind having around? Maybe I'm just being optimistic, but whatever. :)

    (If any lawyers are reading this, please let me know how my attempt at drafting this would fly in a court. I'm honestly very curious. And hopeful; I don't think I phrased anything so that it'd be completely unreasonable, seeing as how this is basically a roommate-type behavior agreement that boils down to "self-sufficiency and common-sense responsibility, el Duderino!" but one that makes it clear that one party has recourse if the other breaks it?)

    [–]Cuisinart_Killa 6 ポイント7 ポイント  (6子コメント)

    Point her to the nearest payday loanshark.

    [–]Molly_Battleaxe 6 ポイント7 ポイント  (5子コメント)

    he needs rent

    although $1200 for a years lease is a pretty shit deal for him

    [–]donthaveacowman1 10 ポイント11 ポイント  (23子コメント)

    You could buy her a sack of rice and a sack of beans and many throw in a lesson on the water boiling required to turn them into dinner.

    [–]Throwaway826228[S] 32 ポイント33 ポイント  (21子コメント)

    She turned her nose up at fresh fry bread.

    [–]jetblack357 26 ポイント27 ポイント  (0子コメント)

    That's fucking heresy.

    Tell her to piss off and learn to cook. Shits easy, and you don't owe her a thing.

    [–]Lesp00n 20 ポイント21 ポイント  (10子コメント)

    She doesn't want fry bread? Where did you find this woman? Space? Because I've never met a single human being who wouldn't love some fry bread.

    [–]Throwaway826228[S] 10 ポイント11 ポイント  (1子コメント)

    I'm slightly offended by it, I make awesome fry bread.

    [–]AnnaLemma 18 ポイント19 ポイント  (0子コメント)

    Look on the bright side: you get all the fry-bread!

    (Also, are you in the market for a new roommate? Asking for a friend...)

    [–]LativianHeat 10 ポイント11 ポイント  (7子コメント)

    Wth is fry bread

    [–]somnambulist80 7 ポイント8 ポイント  (0子コメント)

    It's what it sounds like -- fry bread. Normal bread, cooked in a deep fryer instead of in an oven. You know how good a slice of hot, freshly made homemade bread is? Now imagine that but deep fried.

    [–]blackbirdsongs 10 ポイント11 ポイント  (0子コメント)

    It's native America gold standard deliciousness. I miss it so much.

    [–]tat2mycat 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (4子コメント)

    The greatest fucking food ever. Made by my people. :)

    [–]buttonpillow 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (3子コメント)

    Canadian here - would you say it's more like bannock or a beavertail?

    [–]Ihavesubscriptions 2 ポイント3 ポイント  (0子コメント)

    I had no idea what either of those were, but consulting Google leads me to believe a beavertail would be closer. Man I'm hungry now, I'd kill for some fresh frybread.

    [–]tat2mycat 2 ポイント3 ポイント  (1子コメント)

    Beavertail, but they are meat filled not sugary.

    [–]Throwaway826228[S] 4 ポイント5 ポイント  (0子コメント)

    Unless you have them with honey and berries.

    [–]emergentdragon 6 ポイント7 ポイント  (0子コメント)

    So you offered her fresh food, and she turned it down? Ok, that's it. Case closed.

    [–]NerdCrush 4 ポイント5 ポイント  (0子コメント)

    Ohh I miss fry bread.

    Now I want a taco.

    [–]warpus 5 ポイント6 ポイント  (5子コメント)

    Whoa I looked this up and it looks amazing. I don't think we have it up here in Canada though.. too bad..

    [–]Throwaway826228[S] 2 ポイント3 ポイント  (4子コメント)

    It's easy to make.

    [–]warpus 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (3子コメント)

    Going to look up a recipe, judging by the images that came up when I googled it I assumed it was a fast food chain

    [–]Throwaway826228[S] 2 ポイント3 ポイント  (1子コメント)

    No not at all. It's soft,warm, fried dough with a slightly crispy golden outside.

    [–]warpus 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (0子コメント)

    Mmm that does sound pretty good.

    Good luck with your roommate btw

    [–]buttonpillow 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (0子コメント)

    I asked above, seems to be some sort of meat-filled beavertail?

    [–]Zenock43 3 ポイント4 ポイント  (0子コメント)


    When she starts whining because she can't or won't learn to cook. "I will walk you through how to do it as many times as you need, but I WILL NOT be cooking for you."

    If she's going to behave like a child, time to start treating her like one.

    [–]McBonderson 3 ポイント4 ポイント  (6子コメント)

    your not required to give her anything. however if it were me, I would not want to let her starve. so if you chose to, give her something like canned liver or something. she won't starve but but the food would be gross enough that she might be motivated to budget better in the future.

    [–]kosmickoyote 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (2子コメント)


    [–]Teddy_Bilgewater 4 ポイント5 ポイント  (1子コメント)

    Sardines are delicious. Invest in $20 worth of ramen packets, tell her she's set until she gets paid and she'll have to provide for her own food after the ramen runs out.

    [–]kosmickoyote 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

    You either like sardines or you don't. I will eat them but many will not. She seems picky so most likely won't appreciate. I'm not sure she can boil water or operate a microwave so I refrained from suggesting ramen.

    [–][deleted] 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (0子コメント)

    A woman rents a room from me for $100 a month.

    People would kill for that. WTF man?

    [–]Pnk-Kitten 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (9子コメント)

    Point of clarification, is OP required to leave his food and cooking pots in the common area? I know the fridge, stove, oven, sink must stay, but what else has to?

    [–]OneRedSent 7 ポイント8 ポイント  (8子コメント)

    In a similar situation, I left the main fridge in the kitchen, but got another fridge which I kept in my locked room and that's where I kept my food. Bad roommates suck.

    [–]Pnk-Kitten 8 ポイント9 ポイント  (6子コメント)

    I'm remembering a post where someone else had a tenant/lodger and they removed the good fridge, but were told this was a no no. I want to know what exactly you are expected to leave if you have a crazy lodger. Can I take my cast iron to my room? What about my vintage plates from my great grandmother? I honest to goodness want to know.

    [–]buttonpillow 4 ポイント5 ポイント  (0子コメント)

    When I had shitty roommates I kept my good cutting board and my grandmother's cast iron in my room, otherwise it would all end up in the dishwasher

    [–]Lost4468 2 ポイント3 ポイント  (3子コメント)

    Write it into the lease and/or don't give them access from the start. The worst thing you can do is give them access then randomly remove it several months later.

    [–]Afswyn 2 ポイント3 ポイント  (0子コメント)

    What gets me is, they removed it because it was a very expensive fridge, the tenant was outright threatening to destroy it, and they provided a much less expensive one for use instead (which was never used, making it a moot argument on the tenant's part, I'd imagine) and OP was told that that was constructive eviction territory. (OP also removed their expensive cookware and dishes, iirc, leaving the crazypants with serviceable, if cheap, free replacements.)

    I'd honestly like to know, where is the line drawn between mitigating one's damages (after being explicitly forewarned of them, no less!) and constructive eviction?

    [–]SidSuicide 2 ポイント3 ポイント  (0子コメント)

    Went through this too. Sorry you're dealing with it.

    I can't think of one good roommate I've ever had except for my husband, and even he's a damn lazy roommate sometimes.

    [–]14_letter_S_word 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (3子コメント)

    IANAL but follow-up legal question/possible solution:

    How legal would it be for OP to charge the roommate for food? EX: OP buys a big bag of rice, beans, whatever when the mooching roommate wants some, fine, that'll be $2.00 (or whatever) a serving, either upfront or put on a tab.

    Could OP then legally collect this money either immediately or collect on a bill? Would a written contract have to be in place, and if it was, would it be enforceable?