About this project
Hello interwebz! We present to you, the most offensive image based party card game known to exist on this dangerously warming planet.
H8Rs GAME
It is an image based card game that rewards the most fucked up interpretation of a situation.
Our GAME is simple.
1) The dealer plays an image card.
2) Players play descriptions cards. Of course you would use the description cards in the players' hands.
3) The dealer picks the funniest most fucked up card submitted as the winner.
4) Rinse and repeat.
The GAME knows no boundaries, shame, or decency. If you can stomach the most politically incorrect jokes, situations, and/or company, you will have a damn good time with the H8Rs GAME.
Race, gender, sexuality, religion, politics, etc. are all open for ridicule. There are no safe spaces.
Our GAME comes with 495 cards total!
80 Image Cards and 415 Description Cards.
BEFORE YOU START THE GAME:
1. To begin, force the minority in your group to shuffle the deck. This puts them in their place. If there are multiple non-whites in your group, go from darkest to lightest.
2. Since this is the 21st century, after having your female “friend(s)” make you a sandwich, they may partake in your festivities.
3. Select an alpha from your group of “friends” via a Street Fighter like martial arts tournament. The alpha will be the “image card” dealer. The Master H8R.
4. Pass out the “description cards” to each “person.” You can pass out 10, 20, or however many cards you want. We really don’t give a shit if you decide to change any details of our GAME.
RULES AND SHIT:
1. The Master H8R (dealer) plays a random “image card” from the deck. Honor your heritage and segregate your white cards from your colored “description cards.” It will make playing the GAME so much easier.
2. The goal of the GAME is to describe/explain the “image card” that has been played in the most fucked up and hilarious way possible. Remember children, use the “description cards” each of you have in your hands.
3. After you assholes have made a decision as to which card to play that round, each H8R (player) will place the “description card” face down and present it to the Master H8R (dealer) for thorough inspection. Just like last night… Slut.
4. Unlike a shitty Disney movie, the Master H8R will pick the ugliest, most fucked up, triggering “description card” that best brings out the Master H8R’s deeply troubling sociopathic laughter. During any point in the GAME, if a H8R (player) is ever told to “check your privilege,” or is called a racist, scum, etc. that H8R should show that social justice warrior that there are no such thing as safe spaces.
5. Rinse, repeat, and remember to rotate the Master H8R (dealer) position. Sharing is caring dickbags.
6. Play until one H8R wins 5 rounds total or whatever number you choose to play up to.
SUGGESTED WAYS TO PLAY
DRUNKEN MASTER
It really helps if you have drinks to play our GAME proper. Once you have a few in your system, gather your friends for a rousing round of H8Rs. If you do not have any friends, you wasted money on our shit and we thank you for it.
The rules are simple. Each time a person wins a round, the winner gets to pick who does a shot. Keep playing until someone throws up. Another fun way to switch things up is play to… I dunno like best of 5 then see if your “straight” friends Jim and Tim make out. Film it, upload it to Facebook, tag your friends and proceed to send the evidence to their family. This is a terrible suggestion but we like to encourage that kind of maverick behavior.
You should not take counsel from someone who is writing this drunk.
FAUSTIAN BARGAIN
After each round, each player can turn in more than one card for new ones. For each extra card that is turned in, that player must give up an article of clothing. Play to the best of 3 or whatever number you feel is right. The player can take back an article of clothing only if they perform an act dictated by the winner of the round. The slave must obey!
Some may call this slavery but the drunk dipshit got him or herself into this. Though each group of people have different limits for acceptable behavior under these circumstances, we at H8Rs would like to make the following suggestions based on our play of the GAME:
I) Vigorously giving a live cougar a rim job
II) Streaking down the street while preaching apocalyptic visions
III) Sending photos of the person tied up and gagged with a ransom note to his/her significant other
IV) Waterboarding
CAPITALIST REVOLUTION
Play the GAME as you would however, after each card is turned in and the descriptions are read out loud like a vagina monologue, each player must guess what the MASTER H8R would pick as the winner. The person(s) who guess correctly will be awarded with an additional card. Furthermore, the person(s) may pick one of the losers to steal from. The person(s) who guess correctly may trade any card from their hand for a random card in the loser’s hand. This is how the lower classes are kept in their place. Continue to play and observe the growing disparity between the talentless and the capitalist heroes.
Once the GAME has progressed to the point where the under humans cannot hope to win a round, call the police to complete the losers’ descent into the prison cycle. Celebrate by exporting the GAME to another group of friends you can exploit.
FUNDS NEEDED: $12,000 EXPLAINED
As a prostitute in post-war Japan would say, "we need money". We came up with the $12,000 after searching for numerous game producers. We calculated the $12,000 as being the minimum costs needed for producing our GAME from a reputable company.
The funds would cover only the production of the GAME. The $12,000 would allow us to order the minimum number of bulk units. The product is ready to be sent to the printers, we need your help to bring this "lovely" and "wholesome" family experience to you all.
PRODUCTION SCHEDULE:
As the GAME is ready to go, once we end the kickstarter campaign, we expect that we would need roughly 4-5 months to organize and ship the product to you H8Rs.
February 2017
- Collection of funds
- Organizing orders
- Contact producer and get printers ready
- Organize shipment details
- Send product to producer for print
- Finalize customized images
March 2017
- Follow up with producer
- Follow up with artist on custom image orders
- Order customer image cards
April 2017
- Receive products and units from producer
- Organize shipping to backers
- END OF APRIL/EARLY MAY: Ship product out to backers
May 2017
- END OF APRIL/EARLY MAY: Ship product out to backers
We will make sure to update everyone on a regular basis on kickstarter and our website! Follow us on our website, facebook, and twitter!
http://www.theh8rs.com
https://www.facebook.com/h8rsgame
Twitter: @theh8rsgame
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCNiHMZ46gvTief1RGZE1xtw
ORIGIN STORY
Like most superhero origin stories, the H8Rs GAME was started in a moment of great hardship. Born out of a sexual harassment filing at work due to the PC Social Justice Warriors being unable to understand sarcastic comments about money laundering (true story, yeah... wrap your head around that one... jokes about Mexican cartels as sexual harassment...), the H8Rs GAME was first imagined as a way to break free of the politically correct boundaries.
Tired of people unable to joke about anything deemed "politically incorrect", the H8Rs GAME was created as an outlet to express people's extremely twisted senses of humor by utilizing one of the many weapons of the PC Social Justice Warriors... the "Safe Space" in the form of a game. Although there were other games in the market that used similar concepts, the H8Rs felt that the games were too tainted and sullied by the PC . In a moment of inspiration (much like Tony Stark when he was trapped in the cave), the H8Rs began to create what is now known as the H8Rs GAME.
Working tirelessly like the Foxconn workers who made your smart phones, the H8Rs were able to create what they believed would be the solution. However, one major barrier stood between the H8Rs and their sacred crusade to spread the evangelical word of H8... funding.
This is where you come in, fellow H8Rs. With your powers (and mostly money) combined, we can bring this game to life. The concept, cards, and box art are complete. What we require is the resources to manufacture the game on a larger scale to allow others to enjoy the fruits of our labor.
Risks and challenges
As the game is complete in it's final form, all we have left is production on a massive scale. In short, the game is ready to be printed. The issue lies in bringing our product into a larger scale production to decrease the per unit cost (economies of scale bitches).
If there are any delays in our production due to unforeseen circumstances, we will be sure to inform all parties on the reason and expected changes to the production time table.
Our vision is to spread this game to all who are willing to taste the nectar of H8 (kinda like Eve). We will do all in our powers to make sure that you are satisfied after being kicked out of the garden of PC.
Thank you for your support.
Learn about accountability on KickstarterFAQ
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In a world besieged by PC, a group of "oppressed" minorities banded together to fight back. Next spring, join forces with the H8Rs Brigade to bring the resistance to an overwhelming evil. Coming to a country near you (only in 'Murica).
P.S. Seriously though, we only ship to America as of now.
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Martha? Why did you say that name?!
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In all honesty, we would love to meet each and everyone of you. We actually have meet ups planned and if you are in the southern California area, namely LA (because fuck you San Francisco) we will inform y'all of the event. At the venue, we will be drinking and playing the GAME. You can register via our website or by sending us a message through Kickstarter!
This is how much you all mean to us, you H8Rs you!
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Because your mother did not love you enough and this is the universe responding. But seriously, it takes a few months to order our product in bulk and prep the printers. We also have to consider the time it takes for the shipment to arrive at our "offices". From here we will sort and organize your pledges accordingly. We are also accounting for the time it takes to ship to you as well. We expect that by the end of April or early May, that we can get the products out to you all. Are you happy now princess?!
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Hookers and booze! There is a minimum order for the bulk shipment of our product. Every producer has informed us a minimum of 500 units needed to be ordered in order to buy from them. The $12,000 covers the expense of these 500 units from a reputable source and would leave us dry as a man who just donated sperm.
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Yes. Have you heard of facebook and google? We know many of you are too darn lazy to look us up so here is our stuff:
http://www.theh8rs.com
https://www.facebook.com/h8rsgame
Twitter: @theh8rsgame, #h8rsgameIf you are on our website, please take some time to fill out our "survey". Unlike many elections, your vote and opinion will "matter".
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We recommend 5+ people to get the maximum H8Rs effect. However, ancient Chinese prophecies foretell of some H8Rs, those without friends, that may play alone. This is sad. Meetup.com or pof.com may present a possible solution to this.
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Our legal counsel tells us 18+. We like to plead the 5th.
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495 cards total. 80 really really messed up images and 415 description cards. Also a box you should not show to children and instructions that will offend God.
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We hold no punches for race, gender, religion, socioeconomics, politics, etc. There are no safe spaces for any group. We are equal opportunity H8Rs.
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We are considering it and will update everyone once we make a decision.