On the first day of Trump's presidency, Trump gave to me, 1 Billion banned Muslims.

On the second day of Trump's presidency, Trump gave to me, 2 Angry tweets about a satire article (only two?)

On the third day of Trump's presidency, Mike Pence gave to me, 3 new laws oppressing the LGBT population.

On the fourth day of Trump's presidency, Trump gave to me, 4 wars with Iran, China, Syria, and Albania (he watched Wag the Dog)

On the fifth day of Trump's presidency, Trump gave to me 5 GOLDEN NUKES

On the sixth day of Trump's presidency, Trump gave to me, 6 more years of working before retirement since he cut social security!

On the seventh day of Trump's presidency, Trump gave to me, 7 different parasites since he deregulated the water supply!

On the eighth day of Trump's presidency, Trump gave to me, 8 awful cabinet picks

On the ninth day of Trump's presidency, Trump gave to me, a $9 decrease in my hourly wage.

On the tenth day of Trump's presidency, Trump gave to me, 10 minutes of silence between his angry tweets

On the eleventh day of Trump's presidency, Trump gave to me, 11 heart attacks from reading his new foreign policy speech

On the twelfth day of Trump's presidency, Trump gave to me, enough Nuclear Bombs being dropped to end the world 12 time over!!!!! YAY