>> Jon: WELCOME BACK.
NOW BY HOSTING THIS YEAR'SWINTER OLYMPICS RUSSIA
MEANT TO SHOW THE WORLD IT ISNOW A 21ST CENTURY SUPERPOWER.
LONG GONE ARE THE DAYS OF FURBEHATTED COSSACKS WHIPPINGDISSIDENTS IN
THE STREET.
NO ONE INFORMED THE FUR BEHATTEDCOSSACKS AS THEY ATTACKEDMEMBERS OF PROTESTCOLLECTIVE PUSSY RIOT
WITH WHAT APPEAR TO BE PUSSYWHIPS.
ANYWAY.
[LAUGHTER]AS RETRO AS THAT DISPLAY
APPEARED TO BE FOR SOME RUSSIAIS CLEARLY THE NATION OF THE
FUTURE.
JASON JONES HAS MORE.
♪ >> AFTER THE LIBERAL POLICIES OF
THE LAST SIX YEARS AMERICANCONSERVATIVES HAVE ENDED UP WITH
A SIMPLE CONCLUSION.
RIGHT NOW THE UNITED STATES OFAMERICA IS HEADED IN THE WRONG
DIRECTION.
>> WE KNOW SOMETHING IS WRONG,TERRIBLY WRONG WITH THE
DIRECTION OF THE COUNTRY.
>> I MAY HAVE FOUND ACONSERVATIVE PARADISE IN THE
MOST UNEXPECTED PLACE.
MOTHER RUSSIA.
IN THE OLD DAYS CONSERVATIVESWOULD
YELL AT LIBERAL COMMIES GO BACKTO RUSSIA.
NOW IT SEEMS THE RED SCAREHAS BECOME THE ULTIMATE REDSTATE.
ECONOMIC POLICY.
>> WE NEED TO REIN IN THESPENDING.
>> MOVE TO A FAIR OR FLAT TAX.
>> WHAT DO THEY DO IN RUSSIA?
>> WE HAVE TIGHT BUDGET NO
BUDGET DEFICIT.
>> WHAT IS YOUR TAX SITUATIONHERE?
>> 13% FLAT.
>> 13?
>> YES.
>> IT'S CREATED THE TRICKLIESTDOWN ECONOMY IN THE WORLD. BUTWHAT ABOUT IMMIGRATION?
>> WE HAVE TO DISCUSS WHETHER WECAN ALLOW MUSLIMS TO IMMIGRATEINTO
THE UNITED STATES AT ALL.
>> WE NEED IMMIGRANTS BECAUSEIT'S CHEAP LABOR BUT CHRISTIAN
IMMIGRATION IS PREFERRED TOMUSLIM.
>> HOLY (bleep) THIS PLACE ISAWESOME.
IN 25 YEARS THEY FIGURED OUT THEFREE MARKET AND
INSTITUTIONALIZED XENOHOBIA.
>> BECAUSE WE'RE ALREADY HALFPOWER FEMINISTS IN THE
PARLIAMENT.
VERY STRONG IN THE PARLIAMENT.
HALF MEN HALF OF THE WOMEN FORSURE.
>> NOTHING WRONG WITH THAT?
>> MAYBE NOT WRONG WITHPEOPLE --
[LAUGHTER]>> WHO IS TIRED OF THIS
FEMINIST POWER, MEN?
>> WOMEN, TOO.
>> OH, MY GOD ARE THERE ANYLIBERALS IN THIS PLACE?
>> HERE THEY CALL ME A DIRTYLIBERAL.
>> MEET RUSSIA'S MOST POWERFULLIBERAL.
GIVE ME YOUR LEFT WING TAKE ONGUNS.
>> I THINK WE SHOULD ALLOWRUSSIANS CITIZENS TO BUY GUNS
AND I WAS FORTUNATE TO HAVE ONEDURING THE PROCESS WHEN
SUPPORTERS OF KREMLIN CAME ANDMADE TROUBLE AND I USED IT
AGAINST THEM.
>> YOU SHOT SOMEONE?
>> IT WAS SELF DEFENSE AND IUSED RUBBER BULLETS.
>> AND YOU ARE A LIBERAL?
SEE CONSERVATIVES THIS PLACE WASPERFECT.
GUNS CHECK.
GAYS TRIPLE CHECK BUT WHAT ABOUTTHE LAST BIG G ON YOUR AGENDA.
>> OUR GOVERNMENT MUST RESPECTRELIGIOUS VALUES NOT SILENCE
THEM.
>> IT'S THOSE CHRISTIAN VALUESTHIS COUNTRY WAS BASED UPON.
>> ALLOW ME TO INTRODUCE THECOSTUMED MASCOT FOR THIS
RIGHT-WING WONDERLAND.
HE'S A SELF MADE MILKBILLIONAIRE WHO TOOK ME ON ATOUR OF HIS MOSCOW
HEADQUARTERS.
HE HAS HIS OWN PRIVATE CHURCH.
>> WE MAKE IT MANDATORY FOR ALLOUR EMPLOYEES TO GO TO BIBLE
STUDY COURSES.
THIS IS WHAT WE CALL HEADDITIONAL EDUCATION.
>> WHAT IF THEY SAY I'M A JEWI DON'T WANT TO GO TO THE
COURSES ANYMORE.
DO THE VOICE.
[LAUGHTER]>> IF EMPLOYEE DOESN'T WANT TO
ATTEND SUCH COURSES IT'S NOTBECAUSE OF HIS RELIGION BUT
BECAUSE HE DOESN'T WANT TOEDUCATE HIMSELF.
THOSE EMPLOYEES ARE USUALLY BADEMPLOYEES AND WE HAVE TO LET
THEM GO.
>> SURE, NO JESUS, NO JOB.
>> I WANT MY EMPLOYEES TO BESAVED AND FIND ETERNAL LIFE.
>> HE HELPS THEM BY ALSO FIRINGADULTERERS, ANYONE WHO HAS HAD
SEX OUT OF WEDLOCK AND ANYWOMAN WHO HAS HAD AN ABORTION.
THIS IS AMAZING FOR CHRISTIANS.
IT'S NORMAL TO HAVE A CHURCH ATYOUR BUSINESS IN RUSSIA.
THAT'S INSANE.
SERIOUSLY IT'S -- IT'S INSANE.BUT HE HAS FREEDOM AS JOBCREATOR TO DO WHAT HE WANTS AND
THAT'S THE POINT. EVENCONSERVATIVE PAT BUCHANAN
WONDERED IF PUTIN WAS ONE OF US.
CONSERVATIVES WHEN I HEAR THIS.
WE'RE LOSING CONTROL OF OURNATION.
I'M GOING TO SAY THIS.
>> IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT GO TORUSSIA.
>> GAY MARRIAGE IS NOW LEGAL INMANY PLACES.
>> IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT GO TORUSSIA.
>> AS SOON AS I CAN GET OUT OFHERE I AM OUT.
>> GO TO RUSSIA.
>> JASON JONES, WE'LL BE RIGHTBACK.
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE][CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]