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I know there are a lot of brothers here who belong to the “No Fucks Given” club…I have tried this and I think I really need some help here….I have an enormous heart, and surreal amount of empathy…I care, and I think I must “feel” much more than others around me….at least that is how is appears to me…I want to subscribe to this attitude, and way of life…I want to not feel….I want to not care….I am not sure if it my brain, or my anxiety or what….But I just cannot get into the No Fucks Given state of mind…I try and try, but things or comments or feelings keep swirling around in my heart and brain…I am still getting hurt or other people close to me treating me like shit, or not being thankful, etc etc….I am not sure how you brothers turn this shit off, it is going around in my head 24 hours a day 7 days a week…
HOW DO I GET INTO THE NO FUCKS GIVEN MINDSET and STAY THERE??????
Please help me out….Men are at a time when panning for gold in a urinal has a higher probability of success than finding a faithful and loving woman, it is time to go your own way.....
Realise that you are the centre of the world.
Quantum physics says so.
It’s your world. Dictate your terms of engagement.
Jesus had a big heart, but he kicked and whipped the bankers out of the temple.
Be a nice guy with an edge and a line people don’t get to cross.
Step by step, you need to reprogram how your brain operates. Start with easy things, learn how to not give a fuck for example bad news on tv. Sorf ot introspection step check. You perceive something, allow yourself a second, do i give a fuck ? No. Apply this process to more complex issues later like relative trying to provoke reaction and it can become a default operating mode.
Stretched to the point of no turning back
Realise that you are the centre of the world.
Quantum physics says so.
It’s your world. Dictate your terms of engagement.
That is an extremely solipsistic viewpoint usually found in the outer layers of the female psyche and not really recommended for men as reality reacts differently to our actions vs female actions.
Stretched to the point of no turning back
JJ:
Just my two cents, but I wouldn’t try to change who you are. I would just try to change who you give your kindness to.
I read something when I was going through my divorce that finally gave me piece of mind. “If you want something, you have to give it.” Meaning, if you want respect, you have to respect the other person. If you want kindness from someone, you have to give it to them. You get the idea. If you give what you want but don’t get it back, then you are around a person that you shouldn’t be around.
Now, when I read that, it immediately became crystal clear to me that my ex had quit on me about 10 years before I quit on her. And any guilt or “coulda, woulda, shoulda” crap was gone. I TRIED, she didn’t. End of story.
I have always liked the Garth Brooks song The Change. The tag line is I don’t do what I do to change the world, I do it so the world knows it didn’t change me. Be who you are, don’t change for the world. You have a great gift, just be more careful about who direct it to .
No Fucks Given isn’t for the people that matter to you, it’s for the people who don’t. It’s not a character flaw to be nice to people, it’s a character flaw for people to not be nice back. And that’s just the process you have to go through before you hand them the NFG card.
Hope that makes sense.
I'm just a guy whose a guy being a guy
Might want to practice at a neutral place with groups of people that are most likely to have women. Like grocery store, mall, etc.
Walk around with no objective. Cut people off, etc. Just practice being what would be characterized as a jerk. Don’t help a woman if she needs something, etc.
When/if people engage you, ignore them. Do not validate anyone.
Note: don’t be stupid. Use common sense and be rational.
The point is to learn to phase people out. Learn “nothing”. As you progress you will learn how you validate people in your life.
In life learning how to not react, doing nothing while the wind of rage is blowing by you is a good lesson.
Once again, please use caution when practicing being a jerk.
But, once you learn how to ‘phase out’ it will help with your relationship shit.
Do nothing.
The real danger is that young boys will be exposed to single mothers
I don’t know if this will help you give no fucks but it’s helped me at least give a lot fewer…
I see my interactions with the world as a set of three concentric circles. The outer circle is “them”, the middle circle is “us” and the inner circle is “me”.
The circles represent areas over which I have varying degrees of influence. Each event that I am exposed to falls within the realm of one of those circles and the amount of fucks I have to give about it are determined by which circle it is in.
Events that effect me directly and personally fall within the “me” sphere, where I have the most influence, whereas events that occur in the “us” circle I can influence only to a limited degree. Events that fall into the “them” circle are those over which I have zero direct influence. This should seem rather obvious once stated.
The point is I believe most people expend the greatest portion of their mental and emotional effort in the sphere over which they have the least influence… and vice versa. For a person to focus their attention on something they can not influence directly… a war in the Middle East, for example… while ignoring a conflict in their own mind is absurd and leads to undesirable outcomes. Rather I believe we should expend effort where we have leverage and leave the things over which we have little or no influence to be dealt with by someone closer to those situations.
In practice, this basically works out to be similar to the idea of “Be the change you want in the world.” Rather than fretting over global issues or even the behaviors and choices of those around us, we focus on our own internal state… our beliefs, desires, ideas and expectations… reinforcing those that work for us and adjusting those that don’t. Over time, the influence we wield over ourselves radiates outward to influence our relationships and even the world around us.
Techniques to get started:
1) Stop following news of events outside of your local area. If it doesn’t effect you directly and personally and you do not have direct infleunce over it, an event may as well not exist for you.
2) Stop using words like “should” and “ought”. If you find yourself projecting expectations, you’re engaging in wishful thinking and trying to control other people and situations rather than yourself. Re-evaluate your internal state, find opportunities to directly apply your influence and start using words like “will” and “do” that indicate your direct involvement
3) Recognize that every conflict and undesirable outcome in your life is an opportunity for you to evaluate your perspective and challenge your own internal expectations and motivations. By applying the lever of your effort in your own sphere of influence, where it is most effective, you can create the greatest change with the least amount of effort.
I am often reminded of the time I was walking with a friend and he let out an exclamation “Oh, look at that!” to which I responded “Yeah, it’s beautiful.” He turned to me and said “No, it’s disgusting!” and I replied with “What are you looking at?” I was gazing up at the waxing Moon rising over the city and he was looking at some bit of garbage clogging the sewer.
We live in the same physical space but where he inhabits an ugly place of guilt, shame, disappointment and scarcity, mine is a beautiful world of pride, joy, opportunity and abundance. The only difference is in our minds and I believe my choice to apply my effort to my own sphere almost exclusively is the key.
I know there are a lot of brothers here who belong to the “No Fucks Given” club…I have tried this and I think I really need some help here….I have an enormous heart, and surreal amount of empathy…I care, and I think I must “feel” much more than others around me….at least that is how is appears to me…I want to subscribe to this attitude, and way of life…I want to not feel….I want to not care….I am not sure if it my brain, or my anxiety or what….But I just cannot get into the No Fucks Given state of mind…I try and try, but things or comments or feelings keep swirling around in my heart and brain…I am still getting hurt or other people close to me treating me like shit, or not being thankful, etc etc….I am not sure how you brothers turn this shit off, it is going around in my head 24 hours a day 7 days a week…
HOW DO I GET INTO THE NO FUCKS GIVEN MINDSET and STAY THERE??????
Please help me out….J.J., there’s some good answers given here, if not giving a fuck about anything would diminish the flames of your lonely little campfire, and if picking and choosing what to give a fuck about seems to be a burden too heavy to carry, here’s another strategy: Care about everything, especially what we call the living, the conscious overload alone will protect you from getting suckered into caring about anything less.
Realise that you are the centre of the world.
Quantum physics says so.
It’s your world. Dictate your terms of engagement.
Jesus had a big heart, but he kicked and whipped the bankers out of the temple.
Be a nice guy with an edge and a line people don’t get to cross.
Center of the world? I’m with Freeman_K on this one.
Step by step, you need to reprogram how your brain operates. Start with easy things, learn how to not give a fuck for example bad news on tv. Sorf ot introspection step check. You perceive something, allow yourself a second, do i give a fuck ? No. Apply this process to more complex issues later like relative trying to provoke reaction and it can become a default operating mode.
Reprogram? Default operating mode? You work on computers don’t you.
That is an extremely solipsistic viewpoint
Yeah, solipsistic man.
Be who you are, don’t change for the world.
This should only be applied conditionally with who the fuck you are.
I’d recommend what caring about someone or something actually means. Focus on results.
My ex brother-in-law was a 20 something child. He was still living off his parents, who bailed him out of all the crap he’d get himself into. They never let him feel the consequences of his choices…and he was miserable. What he needed from his parents was NFG. His parents were miserable too, because they gave a shit…instead of analyzing the situation and doing what was best and walking away without another thought.
Even wonder why capitalism (completely uncaring) works while socialism (share everything) doesn’t?
It’s counterintuitive, but not caring is quite often the best thing you can do for someone.
Actions have consequences
JJ:
Just my two cents, but I wouldn’t try to change who you are. I would just try to change who you give your kindness to.
I read something when I was going through my divorce that finally gave me piece of mind. “If you want something, you have to give it.” Meaning, if you want respect, you have to respect the other person. If you want kindness from someone, you have to give it to them. You get the idea. If you give what you want but don’t get it back, then you are around a person that you shouldn’t be around.
Now, when I read that, it immediately became crystal clear to me that my ex had quit on me about 10 years before I quit on her. And any guilt or “coulda, woulda, shoulda” crap was gone. I TRIED, she didn’t. End of story.
I have always liked the Garth Brooks song The Change. The tag line is I don’t do what I do to change the world, I do it so the world knows it didn’t change me. Be who you are, don’t change for the world. You have a great gift, just be more careful about who direct it to .
No Fucks Given isn’t for the people that matter to you, it’s for the people who don’t. It’s not a character flaw to be nice to people, it’s a character flaw for people to not be nice back. And that’s just the process you have to go through before you hand them the NFG card.
Hope that makes sense.
Id say thais one , is the best answer so far, being a jerk does not save the situation, but being nice to a jerk wont save situation as well.
So id say , respond to those whom you like , and ignore those who wont benefit you in the future
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See it as a filter.
I walk right by that pink bake sale.
Say you are getting divorced and you are being yelled at.
There you go.
Also, age helps.
Time turns you into a hard core gent.
You cannot be bullshitted.
Yet I show great care and kindness to my homeless bros.
Be YOU…and determine what YOUR own mgtow stance is.
Gentlemen, women just ARE and society just IS. Mastery over your Lizard Brain is the key to YOUR mgtow. Leave them be and focus on YOU. Later life is better and you become quite kind to ALL. Mgtow actually helped me and I treat women better in my life. Red Pill Anger Therapy works. You just need to let things resolve. Zen Peace follows. MgtowPanic.com
Holding a ridged belief system hurts you.If you are an empathetic compassionate generous respectful person.you may feel that the rest of the world SHOULD be too.
Should being the oprative word.
The world doesnt care how how you think it should be.
There in lies the rub.
If you WISH the world was more how you think it should be, you can begin to let go.
Just because I can say this, doenst mean I can do it. Working on that myself.
"Your lack of empathy has rubbed off on me" Some one on here
JJ-
Good question.
You are a unique individual. Just be you.
If you have a big heart- great. You can help other people.I think the trick is to ignore the petty stuff. Ignore shaming. Ignore manipulation. Ignore confrontation as much as possible. If some lady gives you grief- don’t argue, just walk away.
You will get the hang of it. Have fun.HAVING YOUR HEART TORN OUT OVER AND OVER, SEEN IT BAKED,FRIED,GRILLED,SQUIRED,BOILED,MASHED, I THINK IT COMES WITH YOU LOOKING ON THE INSIDE AND FINALLY COMMING TO A SENCE OF ENLIGHTENMENT WHEN YOU HEAR THAT STILL SMALL VOICE INSIDE SAYING “ARE WE HAVING FUN YET” I DID NOT WANT TO HURT INSIDE NO MORE . CASE CLOSED . I ALSO FOUND NEW AND EXCITING WAYS TO TALK TO MY CREATOR. WHICH I CAN SAY HELPED ME MORE THAN EVER.
LILITH IS THE HEAD SUCCUBUS AND SHE LIVES ON THE DARK SIDE OF THE MOON
Part of of what helped me stop giving a fuck was the fact that nobody else gives a fuck so why should I. I said to myself it doesn’t really matter anymore anyway. I also said I’m gonna die one day and it won’t matter cause I’m dead.
I’m a very nice person in real life, but I have the edge SunStorm was talking about.
I’m like Jesus the nice guy. But I’ll start flipping tables and fucking shit up, and also knowing who my dad is helps me give even less fucks, there are no more fucks to give anyway, and when I say my dad, I mean God, and angels are watching me, so yeah no fucks given for me here.
I unleash Gods holy wrath if necessary in real life, but other than that I’m a sweetheart, I’m a unicorn.
Be yourself but don’t let anybody take advantage of your kindness, but don’t force being a asshole, but do what you want. Do what you want and what makes you happy, you don’t wanna look back and be like, damn why was I such a pussy and didn’t try what I wanted. Kinda like wanting to get with a girl for example, how will you know if you don’t try, that’s were no fucks given comes in. Instead of being a pussy give no fucks, she fucks with you awesome, she doesn’t you don’t give a fuck anyway, but you did what you wanted, you dig. And like Stealthy says, if she don’t like you go fuck her best friend, see, no fucks given.
He Is The One "I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.(John 14:6)
Breathe with your stomach. I mean push the air you breathe into your stomach while sitting upright and hold for several seconds. Don’t do it too hard but hard enough. Do this 15-20 times at a go. you’ll find the tension releasing in the lower part of your torso. once your body is accustomed to the stretched state of your muscles you’ll find your anxiety being released. took me several days or a week to start seeing the difference. It also helps with stretching the sciatic nerves which when under tension causes anxiety. this is the main muscle causing anxiety. Yoga practitioner told me this in homeopathy. worked good for me. keep stretching your sciatica. there are other exercises too. you can look it up
And about the no fucks given zone thing, learn to hurt people to protect yourself and your emotional and mental state. im not asking you to hurt people but im suggesting you learn how. sometimes the best defense is offense. Externalise yourself once in a while but dont do it while feminists are around. they hate that.
this is my way of getting around anxiety. don’t practice too much of empathy. it hurts you in the end. a balanced dose will do fine.they're not going to make you fight them, they'll make you fight yourself and fill you with doubts and insecurities. keep safe
After being trampled on like a used up door mat by my loving spouse for longer then I care to remember, the whole “No Fucks Given (NFG)” mindset just came along quite naturally. After popping a few red pills along the way and learning about concepts like AWALT, I realized that it was natural to apply NFG on a broader spectrum. As the lies that make up the whole blue pill feminazi matrix were exposed, Again, it was so easy to apply NFG to larger and larger facets of my life.
So, for me, NFG was almost a natural REACTION to the effects of the red pill, and the more I applied NFG, the more peace it brought me, and it makes complete sense to me.
Why care about women in the confines of a relationship, when they are mainly after your servitude and resources ? NFG
Why invest your time energy, and effort in a pro-feminist society that treats you like the criminal ? NFG
ETC., ETC., ETC.,
Try…lick my balls.
Just as good.
Gentlemen, women just ARE and society just IS. Mastery over your Lizard Brain is the key to YOUR mgtow. Leave them be and focus on YOU. Later life is better and you become quite kind to ALL. Mgtow actually helped me and I treat women better in my life. Red Pill Anger Therapy works. You just need to let things resolve. Zen Peace follows. MgtowPanic.com
Allow others the gift of suffering the consequences of their own actions. Truly, you are a robber if deny them the karma the universe (in it’s wisdom) has decided to bestow on them.
If you rescue a damsel in distress, all you will get is a distressed damsel.
Allow others the gift of suffering the consequences of their own actions. Truly, you are a robber if deny them the karma the universe (in it’s wisdom) has decided to bestow on them.
I like this, I highly agree^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
He Is The One "I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.(John 14:6)
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MGTOW | Men Going Their Own Way.
