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How do you handle being in love? (self.MGTOW)

LeeryLucifer が 投稿

Love is a chemical reaction and extremely difficult to ignore. It hurts and makes my days fucking awful.

Any tips?

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[–]wildfireboat 7ポイント8ポイント  (0子コメント)

After realizing you cannot trust anyone in life, I was (and still am) able to curtail the intoxicating effects of falling in love with someone. I don't think women have the same kind of reaction about men.

[–]s0ma_ 3ポイント4ポイント  (0子コメント)

i started keeping a log of how i thought things should go and how they actually went. 99% of the time, the situation was worse. after reviewing the history of my actions i realized its a fools errand. and i realized; Care Only For Those Whom You Trust. fuck everything and everybody else.

[–]LesterKadwell 2ポイント3ポイント  (2子コメント)

Keep in mind she is not what you think she is.

Read more about female nature and remember AWALT.

[–]LeeryLucifer[S] 2ポイント3ポイント  (1子コメント)

I know AWALT. I know they can't be trusted and blah blah blah.

But what I am wondering is how do you cope with being in love (unrequited, of course); it's not a choice on my part and it just hurts. I want the pain to go away, but it doesn't. And it doesn't help when I keep my distance, it actually gets worse.

[–]LesterKadwell 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

Ok, then I hope this can help.

The way I write may seem a bit weird at first, please bare with me and read on. Each word is important.

Experiment and realize a few things:

  • You don't have to provide for anyone else for your life to have a meaning (savior complex), you can provide to yourself instead

  • You don't need anyone else so you feel loved, you can (should) already provide this love to yourself

  • You are already good and complete has you are, you can be happy without anyone, just living your life and doing the things you like

  • Nobody will bring you a better life, it cannot happen from outside of you

Strangely the need for being in love comes from the learnt idea that you're "not good enough" as the person you are. Once you become the "King of your domain" you don't need the feeling of being in love anymore.

[–]JonathanStrange1 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

I look at romantic love on the same level as depression now, I used to struggle with depression a lot, usually stemming from BP thinking. It's basically the building of the wave before it crashes on the beach. I've learn to identify that this emotion is a risk to my health and livelihood. Life is better and more rewarding when you learn to remove your self from this cycle. Try to learn to identify and reason your way out of "the reaction" starting, the more practice you have the easier it gets. Almost like building mental immunity.

[–]Bikemarrow 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

You just have to keep digesting MGTOW articles and content.

Biological programming has to be overridden constantly. It's a lifelong battle.

Also read the deadbedrooms sub. That alone should tell a guy that's slipping that it is not worth it.

[–]ThePenitentMan38 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

It is just Mother Nature whispering in your ears. She only wants you to make babies; she doesn't care if it kills you in the process.

[–]NotDugachug 1ポイント2ポイント  (2子コメント)

Love is a good thing.

[–]LeeryLucifer[S] 2ポイント3ポイント  (1子コメント)

It's really not. It just hurts. All the time.

[–]purplezart 4ポイント5ポイント  (0子コメント)

Loving isn't what hurts, not being loved is. Human beings are social monkeys who evolved living in groups. Outcasts didn't last very long. Ostracism came to feel like murder, because it essentially was the same thing.

[–]yellow_black 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

Sex is the antidote to love. With regular sex, your mind's chemical composition will change and you will view women with genuine equality, just like you'd view another man on the road. Being devoid of the sexual urge is a blessing. To you. Not to the women whom you now view with equanimity and, for the first time in your life, ask, "Wait a minute. What does she contribute to society? Does she do anything other than just preen and pose? Is the an equal, in actions?"

[–]801735 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

Archer: "Just the tip."

[–]T-I-T-Tight 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

I love girls who live in different countries. That is just it. I can't get myself to invest all it takes for a domestic relationship. but foreign relations are easy because you can either travel back to where you were before and have an easy hookup. Or just travel somewhere new and find someone new. The options are endless and finding girls that put out in different countries is easier than in the US IMO.

[–]a_trash_panda 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

It's just hormones dude. You will grow out of it. In the meantime don't do anything stupid like get married and have kids, so you don't have that mid 30s panic "WTF was I thinking marrying this person?"

[–]nigelh 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

It's just chemicals. 'Man up', get over it and live your life. Just don't sit and wallow in it when you could be doing something.

[–]mg-tower2 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

Here's a tip that works for me.

When the pain comes (harder to breathe, heartache of some kind), EMBRACE THE PAIN.

While taking deep breaths, say out loud: Is this the best you can do, fucker? Bring me MORE PAIN.

(Some days if you have to cry, you just keeping crying until you naturally stop. Sometimes it takes up to 30 minutes or longer. Crying is a natural healing mechanism for the body.)

You embrace the pain. The pain grows weaker by the day, slowly but surely. You keep getting stronger and one day, maybe in a year or two, you no longer feel anything.

This is the right, natural approach IMO. Taking antidepressants and other drugs is a shortcut that will only harm you in the long run.