I grew up thinking that I would find my "soul mate" and we'd have a wonderful, traditional life together. And why not? I had plenty of examples of that in my life. My parents were high school sweethearts, as were both sets of my grandparents and my sister and brother-in-law. Unfortunately, I didn't start dating until well after high school, so I missed the boat there, but I still had hope I'd find a good girl eventually.
I'm 31 now and have been thoroughly disappointed by every romantic relationship I've been in. First off, I was not expecting the amount of baggage each and every one of these girls has had. I made it to my 30s without any baggage, so it was bizarre to me hear girls talk to me about their drug/alcohol abuse, cutting scars, eating disorders, mental disorders, STDs, abortions, dysfunctional family life, and trashy ex-boyfriends, etc. And these were all college educated, middle class 20-something white girls. At first I thought I was just having bad luck, but I soon realized they’re all damaged in some way. But despite those issues gnawing at me, I "manned up" and tried to make the relationships work. Eventually, something in the relationship was just too much for me to overlook and I had to end it. In one case it was bipolar disorder, in another it was an absent libido, and most recently, a lack of desire to have children or any traditional family values, for that matter.
So, I've spent the past year hopelessly going on first dates with girls from dating sites. It's so frustrating the amount of effort I have to put in to get a date. In real life I'm very modest, but for the sake of this post I'll lay out my stats. I have two graduate degrees from an Ivy League schools, I'm a self-employed business owner worth a tad over $1mil, I work out 5-6 days a week and I'm in great shape, I've traveled to over 40 countries, I have a nice house and nice cars, and I'm at least average in attractiveness, thought quite short. All that and I can barely get a reply from these girls who have shitty educations, shitty jobs, and no interests besides binge drinking and watching reality TV. It's so demoralizing knowing how easy they have it when it comes to dating. Even one of my ex-girlfriends, who became a major hippie and stopped doing her hair and wearing makeup, and even stopped shaving her legs gets asked out on dates weekly at her retail job.
I have to spend many hours a week crafting messages to these girls trying to pique their interest. In the rare instance that they do respond, I have to carry the conversation the entire way through, and if she doesn't ghost me after asking to meet up, I'll have to plan the date and pay for it. The thing is, I was willing to do that for a chance to meet my "soul mate". Turns out I'm just wasting my time. Girls these days are so awful, it's not even worth the effort. Showing up late, having nothing interesting to talk about, wearing street clothes, flirting with the bartender, talking about their exes, and not saying "thank you" once. All that has happened on my most recent first dates. And those were the dates I was lucky enough to get. I've been flaked out on far more times than I haven't, sometimes just minutes before the date. I just can't understand how these girls could have so little empathy. I guess it's good I learned that now before I got married and was stuck with the consequences.
Sorry for the long post, I just needed to get that off my chest.
ここには何もないようです