Was just reading over the recent(ish) post and replies about Tinder and wanted to share another perspective and hopefully elicit more discussion.

From what I've seen lurking on OkCupid for women seeking men, it's disturbing how many self summaries are just a compilation of what they're NOT looking for in a companion instead of, you know... who they are? Difficult concept? They set high expectations, while likely responding with menial responses, if they respond at all, and don't reciprocate questions.

So, to my main observation, as someone who fits in the W4M category, while I don't have to deal with a lot of the BS above, I stumble upon a ridiculous amount of men who are labeling themselves as feminist. It's a great way for me to "nope" right out of there (though when I'm not as lucky, they surprise me with it during the first date). But if they make initial contact, sometimes I ask for them to expand on their feminist bit, and a discussion comes of it.

One time I read a profile from a guy who was starting a nonprofit for young boys to educate about rape. I was so excited that I came across someone--anyone--who wasn't just solely interested in the success of little girls. But as I read on, I realized he was actually educating young boys on how to stop the cycle of rape...wait for it... because the cycle begins with them. Which I said was toxic to be teaching children. He was surprisingly open to discussion, but more often than not, I'm met with hostility. And I don't go about it in an aggressive way, just a curious one.

I just can't stand the whole "I'm a feminist because I believe in equality" bullshit. I don't know what's worse. Calling yourself a feminist because you think you'll gain more traction with women online? Or genuinely believing in what feminism stands for?