I sexually Identify as High Noon. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of walking slowly over across the battlefield shooting deadly bullets at disgusting bastions. People say to me that a person being a time on a clock is Impossible and I’m fucking retarded but I don’t care, I’m beautiful. I’m having a plastic surgeon install rotary hour hands, 30 mm second hands and AMG-114 Hellfire minute hands on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me “Deadeye” and respect my right to shoot fish in a barrel and call the undertaker. If you can’t accept me you’re a timeaphobe and need to check your time privilege. Thank you for being so understanding.