Dr. FrankenGOP shuffled around the pockets of his lab coat looking for his paddles. "Igor!" He shouted "ready the machine!"

"Yes master." Igor hobbled to the backroom to start flipping the switches to redirect energy to the paddles.

Dr. FrankenGOP stared at his clip board. "Alright Igor ready the machines. In the left paddle we're going to put the southern strategy. We'll appeal to people's implicit bias and prey on their fears. We'll make them afraid of others. Whether they be black or Hispanic or gay or-"

"Isn't this a bit irresponsible dr-"

"QUIET MONGREL. If they believe themselves superior and believe that we can protect that status and position we'll always have them in the palm of our hand. Their loyalty will run as deep as their fear."

"But what if someone took that beyond implication and-"

"SILENCE YOU FILTH PEASANT. Now ready the right paddle. In this one we'll plant the idea that intelligence is a negative trait. That measured thought and critical thinking and examining of facts is a tool by the elite to confuse you. Climate change is just some scientific elitist nonsense. You don't want a leader who makes careful measured decisions. You want a "maverick" and a "straight shooter" who "tells it like he sees it." You don't want to be part of the ivory tower of intellectual elitism."

"Sir this seems like a poor-"

"I WILL FEED YOU TO THE DOGS IGOR FLIP THE SWITCH."

The sky rumbled. Lightning cracked across the landscape as a cackling Dr. FrankenGOP leaned over his subject and pressed the paddles to his chest. "Clear!"

The orange beast began to stir. To shuffle. At first his fingers twitched violently until slowly unwinding into a slow flex of its hand. The creature sat upright. Dr. FrankenGOP mumbled beneath his breath. "We've done it Igor. Success. Think of the rallies. The overwhelming support. The-"

The creature adjusted his hair and spoke.

"Believe me folks. Mexicans are rapists. I would date my daughter if it were legal. I lost 918 million dollars because I'm smart, you fuckin losers."

The Dr. went pale as a ghost. He stumbled backwards away from the table in horror. Igor smiled slyly as the beast continued. "Hillary is probably cheating on Bill. Did you guys see that one whore's sex tape? We should drop some Nukes."

The Dr. frantically scrambles backwards and shouts at Igor. "REVERSE THE PROCESS. WE MADE A TERRIBLE MISTAKE."

The orange menace stood and slowly crossed the room towards Dr. FrankenGOP. Menacingly strutting his way over "See how I walk? I don't collapse or cough. I can use my arms unlike some retard reporters."

Igor looked up from the instruments. "I'm sorry, Sir. We've gone too far. We can't reverse this now."

The Dr. froze in abject horror. The monster crossed the room and he felt two cold and tiny hands wrap around his throat. It throttled the oxygen from his brain. He felt himself choking and slipping from the mortal coil. And before he made his pained and disappointed exit from existence he heard the monster loudly exclaim one final declaration.

"Yup! Grab 'em right in the Pussy."