It's worth noting that a lot of character traits are harmful when taken to extremes. For example, both extremes of assertiveness/dominance are very bad. An extremely non-assertive person will get taken advantage of and be unhappy because they have a hard time speaking up for themselves. An overly-assertive person will tend to accidentally run over the needs and feelings of less assertive people unless they specifically focus on listening to others and taking their wants/needs into account.

And when people say "Men aren't....", they mean that all men aren't that way. Of course, some are. So are some women. And so are some people who don't fit into the neat gender/sex boxes. There are trends in behaviour, and it's useful to be aware of those, but everybody I've gotten to know is an exception in some way or another (some more than others, but that's how things work) and those stereotypes shouldn't define us.

Liking sex a lot and with a lot of people doesn't make you a bad person, so long as you behave ethically (being honest, respecting boundaries, etc). You may be a person who finds more fulfillment in an open relationship of some variety. However, you also made a promise to your wife and should of course honor that promise. You could renegotiate some of those terms, though given many people's prejudices that may simply end things immediately. That's a very big discussion that I'm not really equipped to participate in, so I'll let you seek out some resources if you wish.

Furthermore, there's nothing wrong with being taciturn or not feeling much emotional connection to some things. Most days I barely care emotionally if my own parents live or die, but nonetheless I still think they're important to me and I only want the best for them. Not having your emotions all up in your face all the time helps you make better decisions, so long as you don't ignore them and how they affect you (because they do).

Aggression and recklessness can even be an advantage. For example, that kind of person would be much more likely to start a business. It obviously has to be tempered with some wisdom and care if you want the best chance of success and to make fewer dumb mistakes, but someone without a certain level of recklessness wouldn't even get to the point of trying. We wouldn't have a lot of the big internet companies of today without reckless people.

Long and the short of it is, figure out how to channel the way you are as a person into doing good stuff. Work with and befriend people who complement who you are and can check you if you start going off in a bad direction. I have a friend who routinely talks to me about ethical stuff because he knows has trouble properly evaluating the impact his actions will have on others. And he's learning. His intuitions are much more accurate now.

Keep working on building up the areas where you feel weakest, too. Keep learning how to talk about your feelings and how to listen to others, how to look before you leap, how to talk things out rather than punch through them. Just because you might suck at it doesn't mean you shouldn't try and it doesn't mean you're denying who you are either. You're just growing in all directions. After all, everyone has skills they need to work on. When I started as a lifeguard, I was quite shy and I had to learn how to give orders that would be followed. I sucked at it for a while. I always felt bad for just telling people what to do. I got better at it over time and I'm glad I did. It's a valuable skill to have in an emergency. But I also didn't change fundamentally. I don't talk to people that way unless I have to. I'm much more likely to have a quiet conversation where I explain why they should behave and I like doing that more, but having the choice available to me makes me better as a person.

So yeah, just try to be your best self. Find constructive outlets for your tendencies. Figure out the so-called "required secondary powers" that make your strengths into real strengths. Self-improvement is a pain in the ass a lot of the time, but it's almost never bad.