Hello all.
I've been lurking here for the past month or so, reading almost every single post. So much of what I find here resonates with a part of me that until now, has never really found the comfort of validation by so many like-minded peers. I am 100% certain that I will never marry and 95% sure that I will never have children. That 5% is reserved for the possibility of a surrogate/egg-donor situation or adoption. This is for several reasons that of course, all of you are familiar with. I have many big plans for my life and I know that being a provider will hold me back. I also know love is scientifically proven not to last and will never allow myself to be in a situation like so many of the ones I've read here - divorce, alimony, and having your kids taken away from you. This is where I agree completely with the sentiments of the community...now let me address where I lose you guys.
I don't understand the hate. Maybe I am misunderstanding something but there seems to be an intense hatred of woman here. I understand why a man who has been put through hell by his wife would hate her. But why hate all women? Is it because of what they would/might do to you if you let them? First of all, I'm not so sure that all women are the way they are portrayed here on this sub. It seems that many are though and it is impossible to know you won't get screwed after marriage. Since it doesn't really matter for the sake of my argument, I will just concede though that all women are this way. Fine. Let me frame it a different way.
If you were playing chess with someone and you noticed that s/he was attempting to set up a fork to trap you and force you to lose your rook. Would you hate that person? No. You would recognize that s/he has a goal and you have a goal and your goals don't co-align. You wouldn't hate the person but you sure as hell, aren't going to let him/her succeed with the fork. I see the issue at hand similarly. If a women expressing interest in you truly is trying to trap you and force you to provide for her while she goes off and fucks Chad, why is that so terrible? She has something she wants and she is trying to get it. You have agency and it is your responsibility to never let that happen. You have your agenda and she has hers.
Now I'll take it even one step further and say that I don't think women almost ever have such a clear devious agenda going into a marriage. I think what happens is that because humans aren't meant to have life-long monogamous relationships, marriages eventually fall apart. When this happens, one's selfish and malevolent nature presents itself as they attempt to destroy the other's life and take everything. As it is in our current society though, women have a huge advantage here and are usually the ones who succeed.
To me, what turns me away for the ideology is similar to what turns me away from feminism. Just because you realize you are at odds with another group and attempt to make changes to turn the tables in your favor doesn't mean you have to hate the other side. That's why I lose feminism when it starts to hate men. And I lose MGTOW when its starts to hate women.
I apologize for the long post but I really wanted to spell out exactly what was holding me back from completely embracing this community. If you have read this far, I'd just like to conclude that I completely agree it makes no sense to get married in today's age and you will most likely fuck yourself over by doing so. That being said, please help me understand why this hatred of women is justified. Thank you.
ここには何もないようです