Men don't want to date single mothers

[benjamin]

The message has gotten across to women: men are now wiser -- do not want a woman with a child not his. It is becoming more difficult to pull ol' Alfa-lay Beta-Pay strategy:

Me and my girlfriend Heather have been together a year, and have discussed moving in together. We spend the night at each others' places regularly. Sometimes her "niece" Jenna is there too and shes a good kid, little nosy but hey she's seven. I've never met Jenna's mom/ Heather's sister but Heather said it's cause her sister travels a lot and since her ex (whom I've also never met) lives in the same city Jenna stays with Heather a lot.

The other night she tells me to come over cause she needs to talk. When I get there her niece is there with her. Along with some dude I've never met. He introduces himself as my Heather's ex and Jenna's dad. I think it's weird how she dated her sister's ex but then Heather drops this bomb on me. Jenna her daughter, and she doesn't have a sister. Heather said she kept this a secret because she knows how people don't want to date single mothers. Her ex Don then said he would take Jenna out for ice cream and left us to talk.

Of course I start drilling her about how she could lie to me all of this time. Her parents lied to me, all of her friends lied to me. She's countering that if I had known she had a kid I never would have even asked her out, so since we're in such a good place now it shouldn't matter that Jenna is her daughter. It went back and forth till I left. It's been about two days and we haven't seen or spoken to each other since.

I feel totally 100% justifiable in breaking up. This was a huge breach of trust, and on top of that she's right, I wouldn't have asked her out if I had known she'd had a kid. I do not want kids whether they're mine or some one else's. i love Heather, and Jenna's a good kid, but I don't think there's any coming back from this. Could this step parent dynamic work out after this?

Run Forrest, Run!!!

Edit: Link

[TDG]

After the first paragraph, I knew where this was heading.

[trajan]

On the plus side, he got a full year of top quality husband-latching sex, and now he gets to walk away without an ounce of guilt.

[Demosthenes]

What is so laughable is how these women think they get to take advantage of a man's 'time investment' into a relationship.

Yes, they are close, and yes they have enjoyed things to this point, but she based their entire relationship on a lie.

Repeat that again. She based the entire relationship on a lie. And she expects it to be overlooked because 'they are in a good place now'. From whose fucking perspective are things 'in a good place'? Hers…because she thinks he'll forgive her lie. Worse, she had everyone he met through her lie to him, disrespect him, and they fucking did. Is that 'a good place'?

Talk about a whole list of people who he knows he can write off for lying to him. Hell, the kid has actively been going along with this bullshit lie, and the ex was there to help her with her 'we're in a good place - forgive the lies I told' intervention.

When everything you've shared has been based on a foundational lie, there is no 'good place' in that relationship. This bitch thought she's get a pass because she felt the time was good 'the good place' where she could manipulate him into forgiving her for her lying and deceptions. That is the 'good place' where she thought things were.

She has perhaps provided some enjoyable moments in his life, but their entire relationship is based on a lie, which she and her family and friends, to whatever degree of involvement, maintained in order for her to deceive him in hopes that he would simply have a low enough self esteem to just forgive her for her lies.

This guy is completely justified in ending the relationship and never speaking to this woman, and anyone else who lied to him along the way.

No sympathy for the lying bitch who was using him and the feelings she hoped he had developed to keep him in a situation he would not have chosen to begin with.

The question at the end is awful though. Step parenting is difficult enough, let alone having to deal with a child, and her mother, and the mothers friends and family who have consistently lied to him the entire time.

No - there's no coming back from that bullshit.

[Baldhiker]

So, he met her family, met her friends, but never met her sister? Did he ever ask to see a picture of said sister? Hell, my older brother got involved with single mom in 1974, by May, 1975 he was dead by his own hand. Yeah, they're just the fuckin' best aren't they?

[womanhater]

So did this duplicitous mendacious gash make her kid pretend to be her niece too? How's that going to affect the kid? Sorry pumpkin, you're worthless and mommy has to pretend you're not my kid so I can try to trick a man into loving me. I see a future involving a notch count documented in scientific notation, multiple stints in rehab, and a bare minimum of four abortions.

[Primus_Pilus]

Things never to expect from women ....

Loyalty
Honesty
Honor
Selflessness


Once you accept that, women become pretty easy to figure out.

[Demosthenes]

Things never to expect from women ....

Loyalty
Honesty
Honor
Selflessness


Once you accept that, women become pretty easy to figure out.

Here's another group of words that work as well…

Caring
Understanding
Nurturing
Tender

[Calloway]

"*Phew* I'm so glad we're getting stuff off our chests and out in the open. There's something that I've been meaning to tell you, too. And since we're in a good place, I hope you'll be open to this.

I'm married."

[Sam I Am]

yeah, this really had zero to do with her being a single mother.... (although true enough, if he'd known that, maybe he wouldn't have gotten involved).

but her being a single mother isn't why he dumped her. He dumped for actually the more important reason:

she's a fucking mendacious cunt.

If there's anything worse than being a single mother, it's being a fucking liar.

[ubermensch]

Single mothers are the very scourge of modern society.

They are responsible for most of the evil we encounter today.

And that's what this story is all about - evil - everything this woman has done entails evil.

There's quite a few single mothers at work who flirt with me - a few of them are quite hot - I'd rather eat shaved glass and battery acid, than date any of them.

[NightWriter]

At least the kid has a dad that doesn't need to lie to find dates. The emotional damage this woman caused on all parties involved, especially the daughter that has to pretend she's just a niece, is downright despicable.

[Kcorain130]

Fuck me... she justifies lying because "oh you wouldn't want to date me if you knew I was a single mum but now we're stable it doesn't matter right?"

That's 100 times worse!

FFS... I wouldn't date a single mum... (wouldn't date full stop but regardless...) but to find out she's been lying about the kid being hers and trying to introduce her by stealth is just wrong!

The guy is 100% justified in walking away... deceiving bitch!

God, they're getting desperate...

Own up to your own god damn decisions ladies... men aren't "bad" for not wanting to deal with your shit... we don't owe you our lives, to become step fathers to the children whose father's you knowingly chucked away...

That's your problem not ours...

"Not my sperm, not my concern."

Repeat that again. She based the entire relationship on a lie. And she expects it to be overlooked because 'they are in a good place now'. From whose fucking perspective are things 'in a good place'? Hers…because she thinks he'll forgive her lie. Worse

Yes and for her that was the entire point... from her perspective she believed things were in a "good place," she is so fucking selfish and self interested that she believes the shitty lie will be ignored... my god... talk about deluded. She didn't care about the damage it did to everyone else in the relationship... she just wanted her way and was prepared to destroy everyone else just to do it!

She knowingly lied right from the start working on the assumption that he would be so "in love with her" that he would be prepared to forgive her deceit...

My god, that's just... evil!

[womanhater]

He should have smiled and said, "And here I was wondering how I was going to tell you about having HIV and resistant syphillis!"

[Phathack]

Single mothers are just another woman to fuck, only they are easier than girls with no kids.
Since I will never meet their kids or the any other member of their family I could care less.
She just another dumpster to buts a nut in and move on.

I didn't used to be this way but a man leans from his mistakes and makes his own rules to the game, ones that level the playing field.

[TH49]

The Liar had to have been coaching the youngster to NEVER refer to her mother
as mom, mama, mother, etc. and to call her Aunt Liar when in the presence
of the Target Wallet.

That is truly contemptible.

[Greg Deman]

Along with some dude I've never met. He introduces himself as my Heather's ex and Jenna's dad. I think it's weird how she dated her sister's ex but then Heather drops this bomb on me. Jenna her daughter, and she doesn't have a sister. Heather said she kept this a secret because she knows how people don't want to date single mothers. Her ex Don then said he would take Jenna out for ice cream and left us to talk.

That's just fucking weird. Her ex also knew what was going on and showed up to take part in this fucking car crash.

I wonder if he was thinking - "here you go simp you can have my sloppy seconds... and this child support and being a father thing is killing my social life so please take over so I can get back to banging other chicks".

[Delmore Schwartz]

Loved this one from the OP Thread's comments:

sumplings 800 points 21 hours ago
Tell her that you are actually gay and have a boyfriend but knew she wouldn't date you if you told her that.

[fester]

You just know that "Don" the real dad, is sitting there with his fingers crossed, hoping Mr. The Beta Slave will go through with the wedding, letting him off the hook.

Good move, taking the kid out for ice cream while Mommy attempts damage control...she badly underestimated him, and overestimated the power of her sex, which I'm sure has been in overdrive while attempting to reel him in like a fish on a hook.

Run, Forrest....run far far away.

[MrPolityczny]

Single mothers? Do you mean widows? If not they are not single mothers because father/s of the child/children is/are still alive

[Notorious GIT]

I had stuff to say, but then I read all your comments. Pretty much just what you guys said.

Our name should be Legion, for we are many.

Best part to this? He's still free, and he's still got time to snag younger and better.

Her? Clock's ticking and she's got the kid.

Thank you feminism.

[Slade]

You just know that "Don" the real dad, is sitting there with his fingers crossed, hoping Mr. The Beta Slave will go through with the wedding, letting him off the hook.

Or better yet,he's hoping that Mr. Beta Bucks will adopt his daughter, letting him off the hook for CS. Sadly, I know a guy who is doing that right now, adopting his wife's daughter from her previous marriage ... when I found out through the grapevine I face palmed.

I did find it kind of comical that "real dad" was there, helping his ex to "work things out" with Mr. Beta Bux, who is absolutely clueless about why he might be doing that. It never occurs to him that the dude is desperate to hit the eject button and have him raise (and pay for) his daughter,

[Naadvis]

Ahh.. this story sure brightened up my fucked up day . Glad to see the innumerable articles on net by the good people, warning men about dangers of wifing up a single mother is bearing fruit

And this is one of the best examples to show that why children of single mothers are so mentally and morally fucked up

They see the mothers Lie, deceive, manipulate , basically do everything a person with honor should not ( I know , I know natural female behavior) take shitty decisions, manage things badly, letting their lives controlled by a hamster and blame others for their mistakes ..etc . Single mothers sure are a curse

[Calloway]

Here's the irony of this situation.

She didn't know his stance on single mothers. If she had been honest in the beginning, he might not have had a problem with her having a daughter. He might have even grown attached to the kid over these past few weeks and start seeing all of them as a family.

But she never gave him that chance. She lied. And when she told him the truth, his view of her, of her daughter/niece, of the two of them together - all of it changed, drastically. His head was spinning from this, and she wants to hear him say it's ok. But it's not. She has proven herself to be a liar and a narcissist. In grand fashion.

Her actions, not the fact that she has a daughter, wrecked this relationship, for her.

For the man, it gave him a glimpse into what he would be getting with her. And so, he bailed.