全 153 件のコメント

[–]Teri102563 263ポイント264ポイント  (2子コメント)

Maybe you need new friends.

[–]BosmanJ 61ポイント62ポイント  (0子コメント)

Yes and OP don't go looking for boys exclusively, I know a lot of terrible male friends and have had way better female friends. But it's just different per person really.

[–]mtm5891 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

I agree. My group of friends is pretty equally split gender-wise and we all get along and support each other despite that. I think a big part of that is looking past gender unless it's relevant to the conversation as people are always more complex than their gender, race, etc.

In the same vein, gender doesn't need to define your sense of self or how you interact with people. You're a person first and foremost, the labels are secondary and often arbitrary categories we happen to fall into.

[–]bongo1138 34ポイント35ポイント  (1子コメント)

Sometimes, I love reading about exceptional women, but then it makes me realize they are just exceptions...

Exceptional men are the exceptions as well, just remember that. Sure, the list might appear longer for men, but women have also been fighting an uphill battle (and continue to).

[–]jocap 6ポイント7ポイント  (0子コメント)

I think it's healthy to remember that throughout history, most men and women alike have been poor farmers, never inventing anything or doing anything really spectacular. Less than 1% of the population were rich, and maybe only 5% of the rich invented or discovered something groundbreaking. So nobody should feel bad about not doing anything spectacular.

[–]pilotdog 148ポイント149ポイント  (9子コメント)

There is nothing that says women can't have loyal and strong friendships. There are both men and women that would fit your description of 'hurtful behavior'. Yes, you are not able to be as physically strong as a man and will experience periods, menopause etc. Equality under the law does not erase the differences between genders. You are a woman and that's okay, you are as human as any man.

You should acknowledge the strides women have made legally and socially because women, especially in North America, have great privileges. You're not a victim.

[–]Duke-W 48ポイント49ポイント  (5子コメント)

"Be the change you want to see in the world."

[–]talks2deadpeeps -3ポイント-2ポイント  (2子コメント)

differences between genders

I think you mean "differences between the sexes".

[–]Rusty_Hackleford 90ポイント91ポイント  (7子コメント)

Men do nasty shit to each other all the time, but it's part society's current expectation that we have to let it slide or otherwise be considered oversensitive, it has it's pros and cons.

Being physically stronger is becoming less and less relevent everyday in the modern world.

Men have been responsible for most of the major breakthroughs in human history because for most of our history women were barely allowed access to education, let alone positions of power(mostly).

Men don't have periods but are slave to an over active sex drive for their entire adult life, it would be a blessing to be able to switch it off sometimes.

It's worth stepping back and looking at the big picture, ..women's role in society has changed far more than men's in the last 50 years alone, a blink in the scheme if things.That role is still constantly being redefined and while it seems like many women are missing the point, plenty are hard at work.

While a woman just starting out today could easily end up as an elected official, a CEO or groundbreaking scientist, that same woman's grandmother was lucky if she was able to vote.

It's a work in progress, men have been top of the social pyramid for at least the last 130,000 years and we still suck, the world doesn't change overnight but you can still play your part.

[–]johnnywatts 43ポイント44ポイント  (3子コメント)

Being physically stronger is becoming less and less relevent everyday in the modern world.

Sure, but until we stop keeping stuff in jars, it will have a minimum level of relevance.

[–]nikdahl 10ポイント11ポイント  (0子コメント)

Alexa, open this fucking jar.

[–]riotousviscera 3ポイント4ポイント  (1子コメント)

meh, that's what angle grinders are for!

[–][削除されました]  (1子コメント)

[deleted]

    [–]tete90000 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

    So very true. Lose yourself ONE TIME and punch someone in the face. It could so very easily turn into an assault charge and a prison sentence. You become a felon.

    [–]javisarias 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

    Men don't have periods but are slave to an over active sex drive for their entire adult life, it would be a blessing to be able to switch it off sometimes

    This is so true, we are blamed for always having sexual thoughts all the time, but it's not our fault!

    [–]narukamiyu 24ポイント25ポイント  (3子コメント)

    Heh, sometimes I wish I was a woman. The grass is greener on the other side.

    [–]manflusurvivor 11ポイント12ポイント  (2子コメント)

    Never pay for another date ever again! In all seriousness though there are pros and cons that come with being either a man or woman, just got to look on it with a positive outlook and challenge things you don't agree with!

    [–]narukamiyu 6ポイント7ポイント  (1子コメント)

    Agreed. Although I can never wear a bikini and show off my boobs, at least I never have to worry about buying bras right?

    [–]manflusurvivor 3ポイント4ポイント  (0子コメント)

    Woah, hold on a minute, nobody said anything about not showing off boobs! I always find the best way to really show mine off is just to go topless!

    Haters gonna hate, potato's gonna potate!

    [–]bworf 5ポイント6ポイント  (0子コメント)

    Assuming you are 100% correct in your observations: How do you know you are not one of those exceptions?

    [–]colibri_beleza 4ポイント5ポイント  (0子コメント)

    I'm a man. Very few of my male friends have been loyal and the strong friendships i had are all gone. In fact, men are kind of notorious for superficial friendships with little depth beyond activity partners.

    I think you're idealising men and vilifying women, for lack of a better word. It seems that you have a deeper issue and find examples out in the world to confirm your biases.

    Male and female cultures and individuals both have flaws. I hope you can someday find peace with yourself and your gender, whatever that may be.

    [–]yellow07 21ポイント22ポイント  (2子コメント)

    Men are also responsible for a lot of horrible things in the world. Dare I say more than women? You are buying into all these stereotypes. I have loyal and strong friendships with other women. The women in my family have aged beautifully. My body is not weak. It has created and nurtured three human beings. I wouldn't have them without periods and menopause.

    I adore being a woman. The things you see as disadvantages I see as challenges to go barreling through. Be the woman you want to be. Not what society tells you you are. Be one of the exceptional ones!

    [–]Enthuzimuzzy 0ポイント1ポイント  (1子コメント)

    Your experience is nice but you can't tell someone they are wrong because they don't feel the same as you or have the same experience. Being a woman is not great for everyone and many of us don't have good female friends.

    [–]yellow07 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

    I didn't tell her she was wrong.

    [–]ProtagonistForHire 31ポイント32ポイント  (7子コメント)

    Women have had major contributions in society through history in every field from war to science. What is even more amazing is that they persevered and made great contributions even though they were oppressed for hundreds of years and practically written out of history because of sexism. It is a testament to the female gender that they have been able to achieve so much despite society literally acting against them and depriving women of so many rights. Be proud that women fought the good fight so that you can enjoy all the rights and liberties you have as woman you now take for granted. And ignore all the bullshit stereotypes, they are created out of insecurities.

    [–]bonekeeper 9ポイント10ポイント  (2子コメント)

    Out of curiosity, is there a compiled list or book with all of women's contributions to science and philosophy and medicine and whatnot that were suppressed throughout history?

    [–]Enthuzimuzzy 1ポイント2ポイント  (1子コメント)

    The podcasts "Stuff mom never told you" and "Stuff you missed in History Class" are excellent source for this info.

    [–]bonekeeper [スコア非表示]  (0子コメント)

    Checking http://www.missedinhistory.com/podcasts/mih-archive.htm I see there are hundreds of episodes there and none seem related - do you remember which episode in particular talks about it?

    [–]FantasticHamburguesa 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

    written out of history because of sexism

    Exactly.

    [–]Hulier117 -1ポイント0ポイント  (2子コメント)

    So if their feats of societal contributions were written out of history how do you know that they contributed?

    [–]nixiedust 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

    From non-mass media sources like personal letters, journals, oral histories and testimonies, business ledgers, etc. That's where raw history lies. The big stories that get reported are just part of the truth.

    [–]TILnothingAMA -4ポイント-3ポイント  (0子コメント)

    The answer to all your questions: sexism. Duh!

    [–]ChaoticTransfer 3ポイント4ポイント  (0子コメント)

    Women like that were never exceptions, they just got buried in history because men were afraid to acknowledge this and erased as much evidence of women's importance as they could, which was (and is) aggravated by the fact that women are wolves to women. Women ruled society for thousands of years, and they still rule from behind the curtains to this day. Men are just more boastful about their accomplishments and more insecure about being bested by the other sex than the other way around. I know alot of girls with really strong friendships, and I also know some men who would like nothing more then to see their friends fail. Maybe everybody sort of hates who they are, but the trick is also loving it. Women are the creators of all human life. They invented agriculture, without which we would still be living in the stone age. Women also invented most staple foods like beer, bread, soup etc. which allowed our brains to grow bigger and bigger and bigger. Men were mostly shooting deer and looking at the stars back then. Women invented commerce, marriage, animal husbandry leading to modern day cows, chickens and most of our meats, the centralised state, legal courts, mummification and many other medical procedures, early church communities, systems of writing and record keeping, art, pottery, weaving, etc etc etc. I think you would make a great friend and are unliky to betray someone's trust. You are more agile and more flexible than I am as a man, and still I know alot of girls who could beat me up. You will grow old beatifully, your smile will light up the entire room and your grandchildren will love you for it. Women are amazing. I would love nothing more than to spend the rest of my life with them.

    [–]nixiedust 3ポイント4ポイント  (0子コメント)

    Sure, you could be trans, but you could also just be a woman who relates better to a stereotypically male lifestyle. A lot of your opinions are based on what I would call false perceptions (e.g. women are untrustworthy, women age poorly). I suspect either this is something you've heard from the people around you or something you gleaned from mass media. Men seem to have invented everything because that's the history that got recorded. If you dig deeper, you find that women have always been inventors and entrepreneurs. All exceptional people, male or female, are exceptions (hence the word). We just hear about more male exceptions.

    Whether you are male, female, gender fluid, whatever, I hope you can branch out and learn about some of the hidden histories of women and share these stories for future generations.

    [–]jazzbot247 14ポイント15ポイント  (0子コメント)

    Women dont age worse than men, Men have lower standards of attractiveness Imho.

    Proof:I am a massage therapist in Florida. I see old men and women naked everyday.

    [–]Blind_Sypher 10ポイント11ポイント  (0子コメント)

    I think most women age just fine, the problem is you're all taught to be obsessed with looking immortal. That aint us either sister, look at your rolemodels and the way you like being targeted in ads.

    [–]unseine 52ポイント53ポイント  (42子コメント)

    Nothing you have said is true, it's just shitty stereotypes you choose to believe in.

    [–]Howie_Makem 68ポイント69ポイント  (36子コメント)

    The menopause and periods part is true.

    [–]Letracho 60ポイント61ポイント  (28子コメント)

    And physically weaker.

    [–]Letracho 29ポイント30ポイント  (3子コメント)

    And that men have created or invented most things throughout history. But this is probably due to women having different societal roles until fairly recently in human history.

    [–][削除されました]  (1子コメント)

    [deleted]

      [–]nixiedust 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

      Not to mention underreporting. Even when women did break from traditional roles and create, it was often done under false names or in partnership with men who were credited. It was just considered unseemly for a lady to be involved in work outside the home. And while many women were innovative within the home, these advances weren't considered as noteworthy.

      [–]shamesister 1ポイント2ポイント  (2子コメント)

      The periods part isn't true anymore. I got rid of mine 12 years ago. Got one, got pregnant, and got rid of it again.

      God bless modern contraceptives.

      [–]Enthuzimuzzy 1ポイント2ポイント  (1子コメント)

      Unfortunately that doesn't work for everyone.

      [–]nixiedust 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

      No, but even so, periods are so much easier to deal with now that we have mild painkillers and modern sanitary supplies. I personally like to take it easy during mine but there's no reason a period is a restriction anymore for the majority of women.

      [–]theanonymousthing 1ポイント2ポイント  (2子コメント)

      Apart from being physically weaker, which is scientifically true due to increased muscle mass in males as well as, obviously, the stuff about periods, as well as the fact that most inventions whereby men-BUT that is because there have been quite rigid gender roles and expectations for most of human history.

      [–]unseine 0ポイント1ポイント  (1子コメント)

      Women have less strength and bone density but physically women do have some advantages as well especially flexibility. Crediting gender or race to inventions is absolutely stupid, you can only really credit individuals and even then so many are wrongly credited.

      [–]theanonymousthing [スコア非表示]  (0子コメント)

      I think it is stupid too, I'm simply pointing out as a matter of fact that OP is correct but that is largely due to the fact that education was widely restricted for women and thus it is not at all a relevant or accurate reflection of anything.

      [–]paxgarmana -2ポイント-1ポイント  (0子コメント)

      I was just thinking that

      [–]MrSnippets 7ポイント8ポイント  (1子コメント)

      Don't be so hard on yourself. What you think are cold, hard facts, is actually the curated image society wants you to believe.

      I hate the fact that men seem to be the creators and inventors of almost everything

      Ask yourself: Why? Why does it seem that way? Because for the longest time, women weren't taken seriously in the scientific (or any, for that matter) community. Because of that, you couldn't have heard of that many female invetors or creators. Because they had to be extra special and capable to be recognized.

      I hate the stereotypes that women make horrible friends and are untrustworthy

      It is what it is: A stereotype. I hate that men are portrayed as sex-crazed apes or incapable man-children. Doesn't mean it's true.

      I hate being physically weaker

      Sexual dimorphism is a bitch you gotta deal with.

      I hate that women age horribly

      Again, society tells you that. Why do you think women age badly? Why don't men? Because society conditions you (as a woman) to tie your personal value to your looks. Men aren't. Because of that, some wrinkles are a crisis for a middle aged woman, when they aren't for a man. It's bullshit. Don't buy into bullshit.

      and have to go through periods and menopause.

      Again, those are biological facts you can't really change without major surgery.

      Sometimes, I love reading about exceptional women, but then it makes me realize they are just exceptions

      Someone needs to take the first step. Of course it would be better if they didn't have to. But that's not how this thing works.

      I sometimes wonder if I am transgender

      Could be. You could also just experience frustration. If you really want to be certain, you should speak to a doctor you trust about it.

      I really don't relate to most women and can easily talk to men

      You should find new female friends, then. The small sample of women you befriended don't make out all of them.

      I envy how men have loyal and strong friendships where they bond with activities and life experiences

      Bullshit. There are just as many awkward, half-assed, non-commital friendships between men as there are between women. Don't compare an unrealistic expectation of friendship with actual friendships.

      I really hate feeling like this because I am a feminist, I believe men and women should be equal, but see so much hurtful behavior from women I just don't know anymore.

      I've seen that from both sides. And men can be just as back-stabbing, lying and deceiving as you think all women are. Just as women can be loyal, honest and genuine friends.

      TLDR: It's all about nuances and details. Don't compare real-life friendships with lofty ideals. Connect with women from other social circles than your current one.

      [–]Two2twoD 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

      Hell yes!!! You're right on all accounts! I also wanted to add that I've felt like OP many times in younger years, and it took me a lot of reading and bettering myself through a lot of stuff to change that thought but it is great once you realize you can be an awesome person, have awesome friends who will understand and love you and you can come to terms with whatever setback in your life. Hope things get better for OP.

      [–]Oniknight 3ポイント4ポイント  (0子コメント)

      Hating women doesn't mean that you want to be a man. It may mean that you've got some really badly internalized misogyny, though.

      Perhaps you ought to start reading more about how many things women have done instead of simply believing the things that you are told.

      [–]SarcasticRidley 9ポイント10ポイント  (0子コメント)

      I hate the fact that men seem to be the creators and inventors of almost everything.

      Have you tried inventing or creating something?

      I really don't relate to most women and can easily talk to men.

      Then don't talk to them if you can't relate to them.

      It sounds like you have your solutions there already. If you complain that men are the only ones that create things, and then you yourself don't attempt to create things, you kinda make a self fulfilling prophecy right there. If you decided to make something, it would prove that you are capable of doing it.

      As for wondering if you are transgender, getting along better with the opposite sex doesn't mean that you were a boy born as a girl or vice versa. It just means you get along better with some people.

      [–]callmesnake13 12ポイント13ポイント  (1子コメント)

      That isn't being transgender, that's you wanting the particular freedoms and treatments that men receive. People seem to confuse this a lot.

      [–]beauty_in_dirt 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

      If you don't understand what "internalized misogyny" is and how it relates to you, you're a shitty feminist.

      [–]Droidaphone 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

      I just feel for you, OP. I can personally attest it's not a great headspace to be in. I hope you can grow to realize that you don't have to let stereotypes of what women/men define or weigh heavy on you or your relationships with others.

      [–]RHJ44 1ポイント2ポイント  (1子コメント)

      Maybe you should start working out, better yourself, become the best person you can be, and go on to achieve great things, nothing is holding you back, your potential is infinite.

      [–]astraydoge 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

      I felt the same being a male,and i agree with the top comment, you need better friends.

      [–]Coolfuckingname 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

      Solution:

      Create and invent things. Become an engineer or designer. Be a good trustworthy friend. Take jiujitsu and MMA classes. Take great care of yourself, drink water, get sleep, eat well, avoid too much sun, be happy. Find the best women friends and be loyal and real with them. Periods...ya just gotta put up with. But you get to create life so thats fucking amaze balls!

      Build the world you want. Adapt. That is real strength and thats not owned by any one gender. Be a person first, a female second. You're about one year away from having the exact life you say you want. You can do it.

      Cheers.

      [–]ricktrillion [スコア非表示]  (0子コメント)

      Both have their good and bad sides. As a man, I feel like I can't really converse on an emotional level with most dudes. Most guys only care about trivial things like sports or cars, etc. You can hardly find a woman that isn't willing to talk about real life, experiences, God, life lessons, family life. I can honestly say I've had more interesting conversations with women than with men. Every now and then I'll find another bro that I can have these sorts of talks with, but they only happen once in a blue moon. Women also tend to be more mature, and are more ready to help if needed. I also admire the bond that women usually have. When I went through my divorce, I could hardly find another guy around to truly vent to (save for my brother), but my ex had girlfriends left and right willing to talk and hang out and be there for her. Now, I do understand that some of the women only were there to listen so they could go back and gossip her business, but she did actually have some friends that truly cared to be there for her.

      If you were a guy, I don't think you'd have as easy of a time talking to the amount of guys you do. I'm sure being a female yourself has a lot to do with it. I'm a guy, and even though I have many male acquaintances, I find it very hard to even talk to some of them for more than 10 minutes outside of work or church.

      [–]slothscantswim [スコア非表示]  (0子コメント)

      Bro, I am a dude, I know plenty of worthless, rude, shitbag, boring men and I know plenty of strong, successful, loyal, caring, interesting women.

      [–]everythingisopposite 6ポイント7ポイント  (5子コメント)

      I love being a woman. Women are strong, self-reliant, smart, ambitious, they work in harmony with one another. You can talk to them easily and form strong friendships. I don't consider myself weak in the least.

      You may be a woman yourself but it seems like you were raised by misogynists and have a level of self hate. You should seek counseling to work out those issues.

      “I do not think I ever opened a book in my life which had not something to say upon woman's inconstancy. Songs and proverbs, all talk of woman's fickleness. But perhaps you will say, these were all written by men."

      "Perhaps I shall. Yes, yes, if you please, no reference to examples in books. Men have had every advantage of us in telling their own story. Education has been theirs in so much higher a degree; the pen has been in their hands. I will not allow books to prove anything.” ― Jane Austen, Persuasion

      [–]WallOfSleep56 [スコア非表示]  (4子コメント)

      Bullshit. Yeah turn on the TV and tell me that every commercial/sitcom doesn't portray the guy as a bumbling idiot cuckold who takes every order from his wife and every woman is portrayed as strong/independent/intelligent and able to take charge.

      Edit: Proof

      More (some of these comments are 5 years old, it's been going on for a long time)

      More

      [–]everythingisopposite [スコア非表示]  (3子コメント)

      Most of the bullshit is written by men so blame your own sex. You have serious anger issues towards women, you should seek therapy.

      [–]WallOfSleep56 [スコア非表示]  (2子コメント)

      What the fuck are you on about, and no it's not, a lot of it is written by the corporate elite (many these days which are women) who want to suppress masculine energy because that is what challenges the current power structure.

      [–]everythingisopposite [スコア非表示]  (1子コメント)

      You're a fucking loon, leave me alone. Direct your hate towards yourself, where it belongs. You're on ignore.

      [–]WallOfSleep56 [スコア非表示]  (0子コメント)

      Good, crawl into your little safe space. Bitch.

      [–]CanisLupusBaileyi 3ポイント4ポイント  (0子コメント)

      You remind me of a cousin of mine that has ZERO female friends because she thinks all girls are bitches when in fact she is the bitch. Whenever she makes a new "girl friend" she starts saying how "this girl's bf is hitting on her" and how "this girl is jealous of me" and shit like that.

      Any woman that trash talks about other women is most likely one of those girls that cannot keep a friendship with another girl because they see every female as competition, and most likely they get along better with men because they cannot build a trust worthy relationship without all the "disloyalty and drama" that OP describes. It seems like you might be the one with the problem and not "women".

      [–]Chernograd 3ポイント4ポイント  (0子コメント)

      Huh. Lots of MRAs drawn out of the woodwork for this one.

      [–]borderow 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

      You are able to do everything that a man can according the law. The only restrictions are physical. However, don't forget that women have strengths too that men don't have. Physically they're much more flexible and mentally they're generally more nurturing( obviously varies between individuals). But you're wrong to say you don't have the same opportunities and you're probably not transgender.

      [–]nerdling 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

      An education can explain most of the fact that men have done more inventing and creating. Men used to be the ones who got educated, but now most people can get an education.

      Being strong doesn't matter as much or we'd all look like the Terminator. A mind matters more today.

      Most men's relationships stay strong because they mostly talk superficial subjects. Sports, video games, movies, etc. Besides, men are simpletons most of the time. You can have good relationships with anyone, you just have to choose your friends carefully.

      You're looking at the world with a "grass is greener on the other side mentality" when there are pros and cons to everything. Ask some guys about what it is like being a guy. It's not all roses and sunshine.

      [–]the_nil 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

      Change comes too fast to those who don't want it and not fast enough to those that need it.

      Unrequested advice portion

      I am not agreeing or disagreeing with any of your confession but I do think you need to dig deep for some patience.

      [–]onesadpuppytoo 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

      I feel the same way. You're not alone!

      [–]DrArcadius 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

      You could always just listen to endless love in the dark and eat cookie dough. Don't say i don't have goals.

      [–]Redwing4114 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

      Most of good memories in my childhood come from women, few come from men, a lot from good situations. Female teachers, babysitters, even strangers. So in that sense women are emotionally farther then men in bringing happiness, health and progress. There is still the stigma about women not censoring or unloading on other people/ being horrible friends and so on. In that regard there is improvement that can be made, identical to men being unnecessarily hateful that we see progress in.

      Women should look in terms of this as an option, instead of comparing themselves and trying to out do men in inventing and earning, not to say it is the only option.

      I will say socially and with emotion persuasion, women are several times better than men at. Once society recognizes this I believe this will make women that do not take advantage, better than those that do. Much like men are treated better/viewed better when they are not assholes or egomaniac.

      [–]panella_monster 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

      Not that I have felt that specifically, but I empathize with you and hope that sharing it here helped a little. It's hard to put feelings like those into words, sometimes.

      "This too shall pass"

      [–]Shizo211 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

      Note that the following is not to invalidate you but to give an other perspective. Also it seems that your thinking is sort of narrow minded in that regard and even delusional. People go to therapy because of exactly this kind of thinking/mentally.

      It is everything. I hate the fact that men seem to be the creators and inventors of almost everything.

      That's probably not true and changing more and more.

      I hate the stereotypes that women make horrible friends and are untrustworthy.

      Not sure about that and I've heard similiar things about men. This isn't gender specific.

      I hate being physically weaker

      There are a lot of skinny men that are physically weaker than other men or women especially if they do fitness. If you were a men then this wouldn't necessarily change.

      I hate that women age horribly and have to go through periods and menopause.

      Yeah, periods and menopause suck.

      I envy how men have loyal and strong friendships where they bond with activities and life experiences.

      This isn't gender specific and just being a men wouldn't change that. There are a lot of men who don't have that either.

      After all simply being a men wouldn't change most of tbose things at all.

      [–]Spiritofchokedout 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

      You've got "grass is greener" syndrome.

      No one gets it truly easy, everyone gets some seriously unfair handicap--however marginal--and you cannot possibly paint with a broad brush.

      [–]DrSuperSlim 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

      At first I wondered why there was such an important difference between men and women to you instead of everyone just being people, but then you said the f word.

      [–]FieldsofNope 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

      I believe this is a thinking problem. You care too much about what others think. You also can't change other people's minds. Some people do think men are superior, that's just how life is.

      [–]lady_speedstick 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

      When I was a kid I used to resent women and wish I was like my dad and my brother. They laughed more, they had more fun, got up to trouble, didn't seem as uptight... my mom's overwrought housewife image kind of terrified me and definitely tainted the way I saw my gender for a long time.

      I know (now) that my strong feelings were solely based on my perception: there is (was) amazingness in the things I found so repulsive, you just have to see the different angles and layers and that can take some time.

      Also yeah, the people you want to hang out with need to be secure in who they are. Shitty behaviour comes from insecurity.

      [–]cylonrobot 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

      I am a guy. I am comfortable with my sexuality (hetero) and my gender. And yet, I've always been outsider when it comes to guy circles. I don't even like most guys as friends. I like talking to women, even just platonic-ally. Growing up as a guy was a pain, though. I always had to prove myself. Even worse, I grew up Hispanic in poor neighborhoods. I just wanted to read sci-fi and comic books. shrugs

      [–]Enthuzimuzzy 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

      I feel the same way. I usually have male friends but have been working on relationships with the few women I've known for almost 20 years. They're still not what I would consider stereotypical women so I got really lucky there. However I've always lived in different cities than these people so we don't drive eachother crazy. I see them every 3 to 5 years of the last 10 but we're friends online as well. My boyfriend is my best friend, but as a guy, and emotionally repressed like many, is lacking in emotions...so I'm very alone in a lot of ways and actually seeing a therapist now. I've wondered if I was trans too but really all my issue are my hate of societal expectations of me, and men really. But I do so so much hate having a period and being thought of by anyone as a human who makes babies, that is literally the farthest from how I see myself, having a gender at all sort of disturbs me, and having a name, but that's another thing I guess. I have considered sterilization, especially if it would end my period but I don't think that's how it works....I look forward to the day when I can get a hysterectomy like other women in my family.

      [–]MastermindX 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

      Here's a secret: being a man sucks too.

      [–]StormieDarkLord 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

      I dislike being a girl. But just because our bodies are assholes to us. Especially when you're pregnant, like I am. 😂

      [–]gemologyst 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

      dude I feel you. I try really hard to own being a woman and being the best I can be, whatever my gender. but talking to other women is typically so disappointing and I also wish my best friends weren't such....girls.

      [–]clomjompsonjim 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

      Don't feel that you need to "become" a man. I know the feeling, and it's hard, and it's overwhelming at times, to feel this frustrating with what we have to go through just because of how we're born. I felt the way you do, and the first thing I did was find good women to spend time with. Women who support each other. You'll never feel as happy or loved or as understood as when you're with women who really appreciate you. A lot of women gravitate towards men as friends because they don't "fit" with the gender roles they're "supposed" to follow, but just as many women reject those roles and love other women and support each other. I promise you, removing toxic people from your life and seeking out women who support other women, it will make you feel a million times happier. Trying to be someone you're not will not make you happier. I've noticed sisterhood not just in feminist friends discussing mutual opinions, or in family, or good friends, even in drunk girls in bathrooms who lend you their lip balm because you're out (I'll never forget that girl! we chicks help each other out). Girls are amazing, and that includes you.

      From one woman to another- you're loved, sister.

      [–]ForensicFungineer -3ポイント-2ポイント  (0子コメント)

      Man here. Every single thing you think men get by default has to be earned. There are tons of dudes out there that suck at life to varying degrees, me being no exception, who are living proof that men don't have an easy life because we were born with a wiener.

      I do completely get some of the downsides though. Menstrual cycles by themselves would be a major drag, and women definitely don't age as well as men. But the upside is that if you're ever on a sinking ship nobody is going to expect you to hang out while it goes down.

      [–]AssassiNerd 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

      There are pros and cons to both sides of the gender spectrum. It sucks to bleed every month but I bet it sucks just as bad to have a sensitive dangly appendage that constantly distracts you and has a low pain tolerance.

      It sucks to be a slave to your emotions sometime but men are constant slaves to their sec drive so I think tho are pretty even.

      Its the goddamned patriarchy that's fucking things up for women. Societal roles shouldn't be automatic. Everyone is different.

      [–]fuzzyshorts -1ポイント0ポイント  (0子コメント)

      Godammit woman, don't you know how fricking awesome and powerful you are? Don't let this society and the pinheads fuck you up. You ARE creation. http://abiyamo.com/10-shocking-beliefs-of-the-yorubas-about-menstrual-blood/

      [–]despisedlove2 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

      You are way ahead of the game. Most feminists flunked biology and had too much fun in the gender studies class to remain linked to reality.

      You on the other hand have been gifted with the power to introspect and to be honest with yourself. Men and women, despite feminist fantasies, aren't the same or equal. They are "equal" in the sense an apple and an orange are equal.

      We have different roles in life, different natural aspirations, and different ways of coping with reality.

      Imagine if a bear was raised to think that it was a tiger and it should spend its days stalking and chasing deer. Let us even stipulate that the tigers agreed to handicap the game and let the beer score a few kills with some help (invisible). Do you think that the beer could go through life not having a clue that something was wrong? Sure, with sufficient delusions and brain washing it could, but the unnaturalness of it all would begin to internally grate and cause unhappiness.

      This is what is happening in society these days with the genders. The feminists who flunked biology don't know that biology determines hormones, which in turn determines our minds and the way we think. But they push this fantasy ideology on to women and force them through direct exhortation or shaming to live like men, while attacking men for being men, and forcing the society to support their mass delusions. The result of this madness is that women are unhappier than ever, there is an ongoing war on boys and men, and traditional marriage has nearly gone the way of the dodo.

      So, every woman needs to ask herself a basic question: do I want to spend my life being a fake man and feel like a fraud internally, or do I want to excel at being a woman that I have natural advantages for?

      Men are more creative in male things. Women are more creative in female things. Those that ascribe status to the first and cajole the second to live a life of imitation are insane and should be ignored until they sort out their personal issues with a therapist.

      To answer your question. You are very likely not a trans (a feminist invention more or less). You are an unhappy woman.

      Be happy and let go of this needless burden.

      [–]Smileadoo 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

      I agree, it's shitty being the "lesser" gender. but the more you read about history the more you will realize how much these definitions and roles are societally imposed. If you hate women's lesser role in history, wish there were fewer negative stereotypes about women's roles in relationships, and want to be able to be friends with people as equals who treat each other well, that makes you a feminist, not a trans man. Now, it's totally possible that you're also a trans man. But men aren't defined by what they think of women. they're defined by how they perceive and perform their own gender. so if you don't feel like your body suits you, maybe do some research into gender identity and gender noncomformity as well. good luck!

      [–]buttblastinstr8maxin 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

      I've never read anything like this

      By a man...

      [–]njtrafficsignshopper 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

      Men age just as much - probably faster given that we die earlier. Anyway the other stuff sounds a lot like self-fulfilling prophesy. If you are expecting women to be horrible and untrustworthy as friends you are probably going a long way to making it happen. Or maybe you are just surrounded by toxic people. Lots of women aren't like that!

      [–]FantasticHamburguesa -1ポイント0ポイント  (2子コメント)

      The only biological thing that sucks about being a woman is periods. IMO. Women even statistically live longer than men, so there's that!

      It does suck to be physically weaker than men though. I think that's why women have been doormats mostly throughout history. If a man told you to do something, he could MAKE you do it. You can't fight him off. So I think women naturally slipped into subservient roles because it's either that or get the shit beat out of us. (or killed)

      That's why women's rights are so big now because we finally get the chance to speak. Reddit doesn't seem to like any sort of feminism for some odd reason but I do like it, shit.

      And as some others have said...maybe you don't have good female friends lol. And hey, maybe you're a man stuck in a woman's body, who knows?

      [–]Tech_Philosophy 1ポイント2ポイント  (1子コメント)

      If a man told you to do something, he could MAKE you do it. You can't fight him off. So I think women naturally slipped into subservient roles because it's either that or get the shit beat out of us.

      I had to log in for this one. I think the explanation for this phenomenon lives much deeper in the past. Maybe with the most recent hominid ancestor. Maybe even earlier. Women didn't become subservient to men just a few thousand years ago because men were stronger.

      Why does it have to be seen as shameful that empowerment for women means overcoming biological impulses? Men must also overcome biological impulses. There's no shame in fighting your nature. That's all it really means to be human.

      [–]FantasticHamburguesa 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

      Aw man! Sorry for making you log on haha. Great input, thanks for the response!

      [–]mightcanbelight -1ポイント0ポイント  (0子コメント)

      Because of stupid stereotypes, far too many men drop dead from a heart attack because hugging a puppy is not macho.

      [–]shutuphenrygeorge -1ポイント0ポイント  (3子コメント)

      You're not transgender just because you hate other women. Most women do get along better with men than other women. I for one find friendships with women exhausting. My male friends like to drink beer, go fishing, hang out. If I don't want to do something, they don't care. My female friend I've been friends with since we were 3 years old isn't talking to me because I didn't stay the night on her bachelorette party. I attended it, I just went home afterwards. I drove 5 hours that day to be there, but apparently I'm a terrible friend who doesn't care that she's getting married because I didn't stay the night. I know she bitched about me to everyone else there after I left. It's really hard to be friends with women. Why does everything have to be taken so personally? This isn't the first time she's been mad at me for "being a bad friend", but it's probably the last because I'm old now and have a house, job and husband, and don't need or want demanding friends. So there you have it. A 25 year friendship ruined over the absence of a slumber party...

      Anyways, I too hate most women and hate being a woman in society today.

      [–]gemologyst 0ポイント1ポイント  (2子コメント)

      it's that petty shit that my girl friends too that drive me crazy. can we just be normal and not sensitive about everything? understand I have your best interest in mind and don't go looking for things to get riled up about, please??

      [–]shutuphenrygeorge -1ポイント0ポイント  (1子コメント)

      Yes, I see posts on Reddit all the time bashing girls who have a lot of guys friends, saying they are just attention whores and what not. But seriously - women are so annoying to deal with. When women say other women are catty or jealous or drama queens - it's not always about fighting for a man's attention. In fact, most of the time it's not.

      I am constantly being asked to go to baby showers, bridal showers, bachelorette parties. God forbid you blow one off, while everyone hushes behind your back "So Sally didn't come, eh...?" Guys don't have to constantly buy gifts for each other and spend countless weekend afternoons at stupid gender-only parties. And if they did do those things, I bet no one would blink an eye if one of the guys chose not to participate.

      It just seems like nothing you do is ever enough for women. There is always a reason for them to be upset with you.

      [–]gemologyst [スコア非表示]  (0子コメント)

      My main issue is that most of the girls I've been close to never say, "Oh yeah I remember that one thing. It kinda pissed me off but whatever, I got over it." They always harp on some small shit they could have simply let slide and then they either need to talk about it or they let it fester and turn into some giant monster of a problem.

      My best friend JUST mentioned to me the other day how I said something like, a year ago and that made her rethink all sorts of shit and blah blah blah. Like, holy shit dude how am I always walking on egg shells around these people??

      [–]reddit7979 -3ポイント-2ポイント  (0子コメント)

      Stop being such a girl. I'm teasing you, sorry to hear your situation.

      [–]eatspam88 -3ポイント-2ポイント  (0子コメント)

      Enjoy your intact genitals. It's illegal to cut yours in most of the world. It was open season on mine.

      [–]telios87 -1ポイント0ポイント  (0子コメント)

      Be happy with yourself and don't worry about what labels, your own (feminist) or others' (woman), are supposed to define you.

      [–]skelliking[🍰] -1ポイント0ポイント  (0子コメント)

      I think its harder for men to have really close emotional relationships. its not socially acceptable for us to show them

      [–]TheProfessorOfNames -1ポイント0ポイント  (0子コメント)

      I'll trade you anyday.

      [–]Silveroriole -1ポイント0ポイント  (0子コメント)

      Hi OP. I feel the same way. Fine, yes, of course I know that woman have achieved things, and are underappreciated in history, and that a lot of the nasty things about being a woman are down to sexism - but when the best advantages of being a woman offered up in these comments are along the lines of 'they're more nurturing and emotional and have better clothes options, it's not as bad as it used to be for women, hey at least you don't have a high sex drive' I absolutely despair.

      I went to an all girls school, so yes, I have had female friends through most of my life. Now that I'm in the tech workforce, I realise I much prefer talking with men. My boyfriend is ten times stronger than me without even trying, and I wish I could be like that. I have asked him what he thinks about it all, and he pretty much said yep, being a man is way better!

      I have always refused to wear dresses, ever since primary school. I've never worn makeup or painted my nails or any of the other things only women 'get' to 'enjoy'. Pretty often, talking to women or reading the female-oriented/feminist subs just leaves me feeling totally alienated because I can't discuss any of those things and I don't seem to like the same shows or music or even food that are popular with them. I just end up feeling like I've failed somehow at being female, or at least I have a hard time joining in so I feel isolated. I don't have this problem with places or things which are decried for being too male-skewed. Yeah, lame reasons to hate being a woman. I know; I admit it, I'm jealous of the women who do the same things as me - stereotypically male work/hobbies - and yet feel totally secure in their gender and their female friend group and all their interests. Good on them for doing it, but I can't.

      I wouldn't transition now but I do fantasise sometimes about how I would look as a man and what my life would be like. Sure, some of it might have been harder. But I wish I'd had the child/teen experience all my guy friends seem to have had, lots of friends to play video games with and rip the piss out of each other (sorry, but all my female friends hate that or can't return it!). I wish I was strong without working out. I wish I didn't have periods. I wish I could not look ridiculous having short hair and wearing shirts. Sure, I wish I had a penis too, why not, they're fun.

      OP, try reading The Female Man, I like it a lot and you might too.

      [–]MediocreDreams -4ポイント-3ポイント  (1子コメント)

      If it makes you feel better, sometimes I wish I was a woman, just to play with my tits

      [–]gemologyst 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

      tits are great. gay, straight, man, woman. everyone can enjoy tits.

      [–]mcmur -3ポイント-2ポイント  (0子コメント)

      The uncomfortable truth is that you're struggling with the fact that the genders were not created equal.

      Now you won't ever hear this in feminist circles because they refuse to criticise femininity in our society, instead masculinity is the source of society's evils.

      Gender equality is impossible. The masculine gender is simply superior by most people's value systems. Men and masculinity got all of the great qualities relegated to them that drives people to be more than they think they can be and achieve great things. While the feminine gender got most of the awful, greedy and lazy attributes with a couple OK attributes (that contributes to greater society) mixed in there.

      Now this doesn't necessarily mean that equality of the sexes isn't possible, but that it would require a massive restructuring/redefining of what it means to be 'feminine' in society. Femininity basically sucks. And its a shame half of our society conforms to that set of behaviours.