I had a thought last night. I'd rather not go into detail because I think it'd reveal a bit much about my mental state but today I went out and bought a knife and I've initiated her on myself

the pain is nothing compared to the beauty laid out before me

blood dotting up where she danced across

I've restarted a very bad habit but my heart is fluttering and it's a feeling better than an orgasm or even ten. It just lasts and fills me with eyes-rolling-back emotion. Rivulets running down my arms and legs is my ultimate desire

I thought I was broken before. The voices, the noises, the insults. I know those have nothing to do with it because I am broken now. Am I human?