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My girlfriend elaborately made me homeless. (self.legaladvice)

tumanityaway が 投稿

Two years ago my girlfriend and I had a small DV incident where I hit her. It was wrong of me. I completely owned it and apologized. I was incensed about something I found on her phone but that is absolutely not excuse. She left for a few days but didn't call the cops. She eventually came back home. We finished out our lease and things were fine. We even moved to a better apartment earlier this year with the same landlord. My girlfriend insisted on handling the lease and making all the payments on everything, which is fine. I gave her the money for my half of the bills and keep asking her when I needed to sign the lease with her. She said there was no need and that the landlord hadn't required it.

We were given permission to change the locks because the last tenant hadn't returned a key. I was suppose to help coordinate that but my girlfriend offered to schedule the appointment with the landlord's guy that was suppose to do that.

Things were fine in our new place for a few months but recently we have had a few spats. Nothing like two years ago. I never hit her again.

This morning when I left for work, everything seemed fine but I got a call from a lawyer friend of hers informing me that I had 45 days to move out of the apartment. I try to call her and can't. I'm blocked on her phone. I leave work and go home and find her car gone and all her stuff gone. I call the landlord and he tells me that he had no idea I was living there, the lease is under her name only, only she signed it. He says that he isn't my landlord, she is and I need to talk to her.

I call the lawyer back and he reiterates that I am a month to month subleaser and she has given me 45 days notice to find another place. He says she will continue to pay the rent but I am not to contact her or try to contact her. He gives me an official date to be out and that I should be served with a notice today by 12(noon) stating everything he just said.

He said the locks would be changed at the end of 45 days and that I would need to do a walk-through with him to make sure there is no damage.

He is saying that I could be liable for any damage and that someone of my girlfriend's choosing would be given a key to check on the property but that I would be given notice of that check.

He is saying I need to have the power and internet turned on in my name today. He didn't say that the power or internet would be shut off, but can they do that?

I have no idea what to do or where to go. This is my home.

I have some questions to what my rights are in the this situation.

Is she even allowed to have a lawyer do this for her? Do I have to do a walk-through with the lawyer? Can they just change the locks? Can I be charged for any damage? He didn't mention paying my half of the rent to her, am I required to do that? Can I leave now? Would I be liable for the remainder of the rent?

Can she just do this?

The lawyer also stated that any attempt to contact her could result in the police being called. Could I get arrested?

All my stuff is here and untouched so I am not missing anything.

I am in the state of Arkansas. Northeast. I am not sure if she is planning on moving back into the apartment after I am forced to leave. I'd like to avoid that.

Do I need to get a lawyer here?

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[–]batmansmotorcycle 23ポイント24ポイント  (1子コメント)

I am genuinely impressed the lengths this Woman went to to protect her self.

Sounds like she gave you one last shot OP and made sure she could get out if you messed it up.

Good luck in the future, maybe seek a little anger management counseling too.

[–]surly_elk 13ポイント14ポイント  (0子コメント)

There's nothing wrong with what they are doing. You didn't sign a lease. You're a month to month tenant. You're being given adequate notice to relocate.

You're better served saving your money for deposit on a new place.

Abuse doesn't need to be physical. She clearly felt you were abusive, and even if not, it's clear the relationship wasn't healthy. She got out. Let her go, find a new place, and move on.

[–]ishootsigs 6ポイント7ポイント  (0子コメント)

Op, you need to find somewhere else to live and move out without any drama within 45 days. You need to stop all attempts to contact your now ex girlfriend.

Anything else will end badly for you, very possibly with you in handcuffs.

[–]53045248437532743874Quality Contributor 18ポイント19ポイント  (0子コメント)

He says that he isn't my landlord, she is and I need to talk to her.

Correct.

This is my home.

For the next 45 days, yes.

[–]SenorJuansieQuality Contributor 11ポイント12ポイント  (11子コメント)

the lawyer is right. since you're not on the lease, the leaseholder can evict you. find a new apartment and move on with your life.

idk if they can change the locks after 45 days. usually i'd say no way, but Arkansas is weird. If you damage anything, you are of course liable to the landlord and to girlfriend (who is in turn liable to landlord).

you don't have to do a walkthrough. you don't have to change the utilities.

and if there's no restraining order, youre not barred from contacting GF. Though of course you shouldn't contact her. What's the point? And she could try to use whatever you say or do to get a restraining order.

[–]tumanityaway[S] -2ポイント-1ポイント  (10子コメント)

If I don't change the utilities, can they shut them off if they are in her name? We don't have a sublease or anything. I believed her when she implied I was on the real lease with the landlord just like at our old place.

[–]SenorJuansieQuality Contributor 5ポイント6ポイント  (1子コメント)

usually id say the answer is no, but AR is weird. It doesn't make any difference, though. You need to move. You can do it of your own free will right now or you can do it against your will by an eviction suit. that's what's coming after 45 days. and if you've got an eviction on your record, no one will ever rent to you again.

and i know you'll have some excuse for not doing this, but you could also negotiate with your girlfriend and LL to take over the lease.

[–]tumanityaway[S] -2ポイント-1ポイント  (0子コメント)

I can't afford the full rent alone. And the landlord is unlikely to rent to me over the girlfriend. My credit isn't great. We used hers to get the apartment.

Guess I need to start planning.

[–]BUBBLYSTRING 4ポイント5ポイント  (7子コメント)

I just don't understand how you thought you were on a lease you never signed

[–]tumanityaway[S] -4ポイント-3ポイント  (6子コメント)

She always takes car of this kind of stuff. She handled the utilities too.

[–]shadowofashadow 2ポイント3ポイント  (5子コメント)

Well she can take care of everything for your two up to the signing of the document. Not doing that generally means you're not on the lease.

[–]spoeftmagyar 13ポイント14ポイント  (17子コメント)

Is she even allowed to have a lawyer do this for her?

Of course. A victim of domestic abuse has absolutely no duty to have any direct contact with you. No private person has such a duty, actually

Do I have to do a walk-through with the lawyer?

You're the one who is going to want to do that so you can make sure you aren't going to end up charged for damages that weren't there in the final walk-through.

Can they just change the locks?

You can not live there forever. Especially not as someone who doesn't pay rent. So long as the law is followed, and I suspect a licensed attorney will, you'll walk out of that place at some point or a law enforcement officer will remove you following an eviction order.

Can she just do this?

No. She is according to the domestic abuse victim act of 2004 obligated to stay by your side for at least four hundred years or until one of you dies. ... ..... ..... ...... ....... ...... ...... ...... .....

[–]caringexecutive 11ポイント12ポイント  (12子コメント)

He didn't say that the power or internet would be shut off, but can they do that?

If your girlfriend was the one paying the bills, and listed on the utilities, yes.

Your girlfriend has given you the stated notice period required in AR and is doing nothing illegal here. You will be served with the notice he mentioned and once that is complete their duty has been met.

He isn't necessarily right about the police portion. Sure, the police can be called if you attempt to contact her. If you do not have a no contact order against her and don't threaten/incite any violence the cops won't do anything.

[–]Dash_O_Cunt 0ポイント1ポイント  (2子コメント)

AR. Not AK

[–]caringexecutive 1ポイント2ポイント  (1子コメント)

Mixed up my state abbreviations, whoops!

[–]Dash_O_Cunt 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

It's ok it's a common mistake

[–]Counsel_for_RBNResident Expert in nPosters 5ポイント6ポイント  (3子コメント)

Is she even allowed to have a lawyer do this for her?

Yes.

Do I have to do a walk-through with the lawyer?

It's good to do it with the LL or an agent of the LL (the lawyer). If not, they may come up with some phantom damages to charge you for.

Can they just change the locks?

At the end of the notice period, typically no but as someone already mentioned Arkansas is weird. If you are there beyond that time usually they would have to go to court to formally evict you. They would absolutely be successful, and I don't know whether or not your state makes you liable for the other side's attorneys' fees. At any rate, if you have an eviction on your record good luck renting anywhere in the near future.

Can I be charged for any damage?

Yes.

He didn't mention paying my half of the rent to her, am I required to do that?

You're still required to pay whatever rent you agreed to pay until you leave.

Can I leave now?

Yes.

Would I be liable for the remainder of the rent?

You'd be liable for at least the rent of the next rental period since you didn't provide notice that you are terminating. For example, if you said first "I'm leaving in 60 days," and then they said "I want you out in 45 days" and you agreed to that, you'd only be liable for the 45 days.

[–]taylorcatz 1ポイント2ポイント  (1子コメント)

Be glad that you are not on the lease? Although if you paid anything towards a deposit you may be entitled for that back

[–]tumanityaway[S] -3ポイント-2ポイント  (0子コメント)

She paid the deposit. I just give her cash for half rent and utilities .

I'd like to live here though so I wanted to be on the lease.

[–]Willie365 -1ポイント0ポイント  (1子コメント)

Why don't you just ask the landlord if you can pick up the lease that she dropping? You aren't his tenant now, but there is no reason you couldn't be at the end of the lease she has...

[–]tumanityaway[S] -1ポイント0ポイント  (0子コメント)

She isn't dropping the lease. She just isn't living there until I leave. She just wants me out and since I am not on the lease, just a month to month subleaser then she can make me get out. I couldn't afford the place on my own anyway.

[–]tumanityaway[S] -5ポイント-4ポイント  (2子コメント)

Someone just dropped off the papers the lawyer said would come but I refused to sign the paperwork. The server woman said it didn't matter.

[–]jmurphy42 7ポイント8ポイント  (0子コメント)

She's right, it doesn't. You were properly served whether or not you signed.

[–]caringexecutive 5ポイント6ポイント  (0子コメント)

The server woman said it didn't matter.

When you are served, all that matters is that it can be verified it was delivered.

[–]damageddude -4ポイント-3ポイント  (2子コメント)

Op, your (now) ex has obviously been planning this for a time.

All communications should be through your ex's lawyer. Be civil. Find out if your ex is planning to move back at the end of the 45 days. If not see if the LL will rent the place to you (or has another place you can rent, preferably in another building). Otherwise, you have 45 days to be out.

Take pictures NOW of everything in the apartment showing lack of damage and what is actually in the apartment. Leave her possessions alone.

[–]tumanityaway[S] -1ポイント0ポイント  (1子コメント)

She is planning on moving back in 45 days, that is why she wants me out and why the locks are being changed after I leave. The Landlord likes her and would unlikely rent to me on my own as we used her credit to get the apartment ( I have bad credit). Regardless, I could not afford the place alone.

I will take the pictures though to protect myself.

[–]damageddude 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

You can probably find someone looking for a roommate within the 45 days. Good luck.