全 76 件のコメント

[–]TAKEitTOrCIRCLEJERK[M] 244ポイント245ポイント  (2子コメント)

Hey dude. You're a very new user, and all of your posts have been about the gender wars.

We want TrollY to be an unserious place. Would you mind keeping this kind of stuff in other subreddits?

[–]Gyrant 77ポイント78ポイント  (6子コメント)

Enh. People can have their standards. All's fair as long as they don't get uptight when I have mine. If you don't want to date someone because they're too short or their boobs are too small or their hair is the wrong colour, that's your choice to make. It's nobody's god-given right to fuck you.

The only basic expectation I have is that everyone be comfortable with the fact that other people have similar hangups.

[–]winter83 204ポイント205ポイント  (16子コメント)

Huh....I guess this is relevant. It was at the top of trollx yesterday.

http://imgur.com/dEfj4kK

[–]evilmeow 25ポイント26ポイント  (2子コメント)

I think this pic is a little unfair. I am very annoyed at the amount of standards that I feel like I have to uphold as a woman, but I think guys also have more than just one (height) of those as well. For example, men in films and commercials always have a "manly" fairly muscular build that most of the guys I know don't hold up to (just like the thin waist and hourglass shape for women). Also dick size. The pressure for dick size is probably comparable to the boob size/vagina looks. Oh and clear skin + perfect teeth is an issue for every human being regardless of their genitals so I'm not sure why it's there. My brother and I have the same shitty skin genes so both of us had bad skin and we had the same shitty consequences for that. The way I see it is that we all have issues with things that are imposed on us by society so the competition of who has it worse doesn't help anyone. The woman who is shamed for having small boobs doesn't make the 5'3 guy feel any better about himself and vice versa.

[–]unclefisty 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

Oh and clear skin + perfect teeth is an issue for every human being regardless of their genitals so I'm not sure why it's there.

Because you can never have enough cudgels to beat someone with.

[–]atlantis145 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

I agree with you. I think the pic is a little strawman-y for my tastes.

[–]Hyrrokin 6ポイント7ポイント  (0子コメント)

I saw this the other day and realized a little later how unrealistic this post is. 6ft+ guys isn't the only sought after quality. If we're talking media/patriarchal expectations men also have to have defined muscles, clear skin, a well paying job, and 6+ inches of dick. The 6ft tall threshold is not the only quality men are expected to clear.

[–]praptor 39ポイント40ポイント  (0子コメント)

While height may matter to many women, to many others it doesn't. Sounds like you guys just weren't compatible, not sure why this has to become a whole men vs women issue.

[–]Dent18 34ポイント35ポイント  (6子コメント)

I understand having preferences, but it's absolutely fucking insane all the shit I'm hearing about how people won't date someone that isn't tall enough

Like, I prefer girls with red hair. That doesn't mean I won't date girls with blonde hair

[–]SugarTits1 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

I'm with you on this. I have my preferences i.e. features/characteristics which will help me notice someone more upon meeting them. But when it comes to dating none of that matters really, the stuff that matters is connection and morals (I need a guy to have similar morals for me to even consider dating them)

[–]GingerBizcuit 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

I think a lot of it has to do with the fact that as girls we're conditioned from day one to believe that we have to be small to be attractive, so for a lot women dating someone who isn't significantly taller/bigger than them can seem really scary, because the last thing most of us want is to be seen as "big". So as opposed to some other preferences like hair and eye color, the strict preference for tall guys is often rooted in insecurity.

I'm not saying that that makes it okay at all. It's pretty fucked up all around, but that's my theory on the whole thing. Personally I'm not hung up on height at all anymore (my boyfriend is maybe an inch taller than me) but when I was younger I definitely would have felt uncomfortable dating a guy who wasn't tall, because I was one of those girls who grew faster than all the boys and I was also somewhat overweight growing up, so I had some major hangups about feeling "big".

[–]Skulder 10ポイント11ポイント  (1子コメント)

Lots of people ask silly questions, but personally I think that by far the most of them are just nervous, trying to ask something to keep the conversation going, and then they go and ask something silly like, "how tall are you".

And it's up to you, at that point, to decide where to go from there.

I've given silly answers (If I was any shorter, I couldn't reach the floor) innuendo-ish answers (When I lie down? 1 ft - thinking of you, 1ft and a half) and more.

But it's up to you to make this conversation work, and you know as well as I do, that sometimes you're the one saying something stupid.

And of course, some people are just obsessed with superficial things, but really, if they ask flat-out like that, be thankful that they at least give a fair warning of what they're like.

[–]YouShallDealWithIt 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

I've given silly answers

5'3" guy here. My favorite is "I'm not short. I'm just realllllly far away. (Shamelessly stolen from an episode of Johnny Bravo.)

[–][deleted] 12ポイント13ポイント  (0子コメント)

I can imagine if you were a tall woman, seeking a man who would be taller than you. The 6ft cut off seems as unhelpful as the "thigh gap" though.

[–]alalal982 1ポイント2ポイント  (2子コメント)

But why is she called 'Bay' in your phone? lol was this set up?

[–]praptor 6ポイント7ポイント  (1子コメント)

That's a Tinder screenshot, so it's her name.

[–]SOURCREAMSWEETONION[S] -1ポイント0ポイント  (31子コメント)

Even as a 6'3 guy I hate this question, any girl who asks is automatically deleted.

[–]Freeofsalvation 13ポイント14ポイント  (27子コメント)

Everybody has standards but I've never asked the height question, like why does it matter?

[–]SOURCREAMSWEETONION[S] -4ポイント-3ポイント  (26子コメント)

Because its asked frequently and objectifying to be valued only on your height alone.

[–]Lily_May 57ポイント58ポイント  (19子コメント)

Imagine how women must feel just like, all the time.

[–]TAKEitTOrCIRCLEJERK 17ポイント18ポイント  (7子コメント)

Don't get me wrong, I think this post is better-suited elsewhere, but I also think it's pretty fair for short men to feel frustrated by cultural norms (just like women do) for their perceived flaws.

[–][削除されました]  (6子コメント)

[deleted]

    [–]TAKEitTOrCIRCLEJERK 0ポイント1ポイント  (5子コメント)

    I saw the pun when I wrote it, but I hit save thinking it wasn't that bad, so I changed it.

    [–][削除されました]  (4子コメント)

    [deleted]

      [–]BBOY6814 7ポイント8ポイント  (7子コメント)

      idk to me that's kinda shitty. The societal expectations placed on woman are bad and they face them more than men do. That's fact. But when a guy says he's experiencing maybe one of those shitty things I don't see why it's okay to play the "women have it worse" card. I'm not saying it isn't true, to me it just feels like when someone says that they are kinda just trying to invalidate their feelings. I'm not trying to start a flame war or anything but I'm just expressing my opinion from what I've seen.

      [–]Lily_May -1ポイント0ポイント  (6子コメント)

      Normally I wouldn't say anything but this post and OPs history really rubbed me the wrong way. We all have BS in our lives we're fully justified to complain about but OP seems to post about how women kind of suck, not hoe this experience kind of sucks, and doesn't seem to acknowledge at all this is an issue that affects everybody.

      Smells a little MRA.

      [–]TAKEitTOrCIRCLEJERK 5ポイント6ポイント  (0子コメント)

      In a sub like TrollY, which is designed and maintained for men to talk about men, I think it's OK for men to complain about things that annoy them without inserting caveats about women.

      Again: agreed about OP overplaying the gender wars, I don't like that either and I called it out ^ up there. But I also think what you wrote is a bit unfair and doesn't fit very well in TrollY. Y'know what I mean?

      [–]SOURCREAMSWEETONION[S] 7ポイント8ポイント  (2子コメント)

      Hey, were in a safe space for guys and I'm posting my experience. I shouldn't have to acknowledge the problems you have, right now I'm talking about mine. TrollX is for discussing yours, I'm venting mine.

      But if the mods dont want this content in here then that's fair enough

      [–]Lily_May 0ポイント1ポイント  (1子コメント)

      You can talk about whatever you want, but if you don't know know then you should be informed that this is the kind of thing MRAs obsess over and use as some kind of catch-all to both hate on women and excuse misogyny towards women.

      Maybe it's just you shooting the breeze about your day and it's being misread. It does happen.

      [–]SOURCREAMSWEETONION[S] 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

      With all due respect, you post in SRS so I'll pass on the advice about gender matters.

      [–]ChkYrHead 3ポイント4ポイント  (0子コメント)

      This is TrollY. This is where MEN talk about dumb shit that they deal with. Just like TrollX is where WOMEN talk about dumb shit they had to deal with. I'm not gonna go over there and whine about a woman posting something about a man being a hypocrite and how this is life and men have to deal with hypocrisy too.
      Honestly, in this context, I see nothing wrong with OP's post. A girl was placing value on his height, but when he implied value on her weight, she got upset about it. It seems like a pretty clear double standard.

      [–]Gyrant 3ポイント4ポイント  (0子コメント)

      I'm not trying to take OP's side here, just giving my two cents. There are more than enough guys who stumble on to TrollX and get a similar impression, and when they complain about it they get righteously shut down. That's because women on TrollX should be able to complain about shit that happens to them without constantly inserting caveats that "I know not all men are like this" or "I know men have issues too", because that knowledge is implied and shouldn't have to be reiterated before someone can talk about their experience.

      OP is not obligated to acknowledge, before he makes his complaint, that his issues affect everybody, and he's not obligated to insert the caveat that women don't suck. For starters, benefit of the doubt means assuming that he knows this. Secondly, it's a bit hypocritical unless that's also what you expect of TrollX, and I hope it's not.

      [–][削除されました]  (2子コメント)

      [removed]

        [–]TAKEitTOrCIRCLEJERK[M] 9ポイント10ポイント  (1子コメント)

        This is a very good example of what I'm talking about. Don't do this.

        [–]Freeofsalvation 9ポイント10ポイント  (3子コメント)

        I must of worded my question wrong, i meant why does it matter to other girls, I can't wrap my head around it?

        [–]III-V 17ポイント18ポイント  (0子コメント)

        Because that's what our society subtly programs into their behavior. Gender norms and roles -- also known as the "patriarchy." Dumb old traditions that need to die and hold social progress back.

        It screws over both men and women.

        [–]Phenomenem 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

        It doesn't matter to me, but I do enquire if I notice he's tall looking in his photos... just so I know how much of a dwarf I will feel standing next to him!

        [–]PM_ME_48HR_XBOX_LIVE 5ポイント6ポイント  (0子コメント)

        It's fucking tinder. You're literally judging someone on face value. Why do you make a big deal about "objectifying" if that's literally the whole point of the app?

        If she responded with her actual weight and didn't get offended that you asked her for it, would you still be butthurt over it? If you would, get the fuck off tinder because it's not for people like you.

        [–]Subclavian 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

        Man, I get that. Those sorts of things just don't even matter but you're still judged harshly on them.

        [–]Lily_May 0ポイント1ポイント  (1子コメント)

        For the brief few weeks I tindr'ed I always asked, largely because I could see what someone looked like in pictures but couldn't imagine them without height.

        I didn't care but it was more a mental image thing. Someone's weight in numbers or waistband size is less descriptive.

        [–]Gyrant -1ポイント0ポイント  (0子コメント)

        Idk what the beef is. It's fucking Tinder. If you don't want to bang anyone who doesn't fit certain parameters of height, weight, hair colour, race, bra size, shoe size, or people who watch dubbed anime, that's entirely your call. As long as you don't get butthurt about other people having their own expectations, and those expectations occasionally excluding you, all is fair.

        [–]SugarTits1 -1ポイント0ポイント  (5子コメント)

        At first I was mildly upset that this post was borderline gender-war-ish but then the comments made me properly realise how fucking amazing this sub is <3

        [–]ChkYrHead 7ポイント8ポイント  (4子コメント)

        I'm missing how it's gender war-ish.

        [–]SugarTits1 0ポイント1ポイント  (3子コメント)

        borderline gender-war-ish

        Because it's being all "seriously, women have these insane double-standards" and is pretty provocative in the way that it could make women go "yeah but men expect this when all they have to offer is this". When really, the majority of intelligent women wouldn't react that way about being asked their weight so close to asking a guy how tall he is and going "oh good" or whatever she said.

        That's not to say if this wasn't an original I would think the same, if this was the original I would 100% think "damn, that girl's a big little hypocrite isn't she?" but again my thoughts would be about her only, not a double standard that women in general have. I mean, realistically speaking, if I'm going to expect my potential male partner to be of a certain height, he's totally entitled to expect me to be of a certain height.

        Weight is a little bit different though, probably because I actually don't care about weight as long as it isn't hindering my lover's health, so it would amaze me to think someone wants me to be a certain weight as long as I'm healthy.

        I'm sorry, I'm not sure if I'm making any sense.

        [–]ChkYrHead 2ポイント3ポイント  (2子コメント)

        I guess I just don't see it. OP didn't say all women. This was an example of one women who was concerned about how tall he was, but when he showed concern about a physical feature of hers, it was questioned. I just know in my experiences, it seems that women can often ask about height, yet when men bring up weight, we're looked at as superficial.
        I'm not sure what you mean by this being original.

        [–]SugarTits1 0ポイント1ポイント  (1子コメント)

        The screenshot is very old and circulates on Facebook every now and then. By original I meant if it was a screenshot he took from his own experience with a girl on Tinder, rather than just taking someone else's screenshot that he could use to be like "see? Women suck for this reason", while TrollX has a lot of unoriginal stuff, I tend not to pay as much attention to Tinder screenshots unless it's evident it's something OP screenshot from their own Tinder because screenshots that are unoriginal tend to just be used to nudge a gender-war agenda.

        The thing about the argument of height and weight is how many of these women that you commented on the weight on were the same women who commented on preferring tall guys? I prefer tall guys but I would never see a guy as superficial for either preferring me for how short I am or for being less attracted to me because I'm too short.

        Also, you can't really compare height and weight equally. Height is something you can't control and no matter someone's preference, there is simply nothing you can do about your height. Where as weight is something you can control, so if you comment on someone's weight, you're running the risk of commenting on the weight of someone who is actually actively trying to lose weight but is just finding it difficult. I would never ask a guy "how much do you weigh?" unless they brought up the conversation themselves, and even at that for all I know I could be talking to a guy who really struggled with his weight in the past. At least with height you're only running the risk of commenting on the height of someone who hasn't quite been able to become comfortable with their natural height yet although that's something I can't really empathise with because I have always loved my height (bar a brief period when I wanted to be a supermodel).

        Even when some guy asks me what height I prefer I generally just say "if they're taller than me then I'm happy" which is kind of a lie, I will always have a soft spot for ridiculously tall men but that's just my preference and I believe everyone is entitled to their preferences, as long as they accept the same level of expectations to be placed on them. I still wouldn't reject a guy because of his height and most feminists who don't have strong preferences won't do that, and if they do, they definitely won't have an issue with potential partners having their own set of standards and preferences.

        The people who expect their partner to look a certain way but don't want to have expectations placed on them are simply called hypocrites and it isn't exclusive to women (not that anyone said it was but the screenshot suggested the #doublestandards came from women but there are plenty of double standards on both sides, it should really just be a "people with double standards like this suck" kind of thing)

        Anyway, I said it was borderline gender-war-ish. I.E. it borderline suggested that women are the only demographic with this kind of double-standard.

        [–]siwenna 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

        What's the problem with her asking why it matters? Just answer the fucking question. You didn't ask why she wanted to know your height.