Here, in the Genocide Event, Germany lines up to make it's third attempt.
We see Team Captain, A. Hitler, known to his friends as 'Dolfie', speaking to his team. Earlier this morning, he told us he was confident in not only winning gold, but in breaking the world record. He clarified he didn't mean the official record set by the Ottoman team in 1916, but the record by the now-infamous Soviet hyperindustrial famine, a contentious issue, as blood tests of the Soviet team during those games found traces of Socialism. Very potent stuff. Nonetheless, the German team faces an imposing challenge, weighing in a mere 70,000,000 people.
And they're off!
Well, this is an odd start. They seem to be using a technique not seen since the debut of the event in the 1900 South Africa games. My word, what are they doing.
Oh, Dolfie has done his rally! Truly a master of the technique, it might be an odd start, but the German team looks set on seeing it to the end. And Ernst Rohm goes down! I hope we had that on camera, we'll have to see what happened, but the German team aren't stopping. It's getting messy, a lot of glass of the stadium track, but it looks, in a stunning move, they've gotten their Jews to keep it clean! Is there nothing they haven't thought of?
Oh? OH NO! They've seemed to have brought in the Czech and Austrian teams on the track! We're not sure of the legality of this technique. Oh dear, they're getting more and more teams in...what is they're doing? Heydrich looks to be trying something different--OH GOD! THEY DONE IT! THEY DONE IT! GERMANY SETS A NEW RECORD! Oh, a moment of pride for the German team!
Umm, I believe to be hearing some disturbances among the British and American teams. They don't look happy at all. Hold on, what's that rumbling in the sky?
ここには何もないようです