If the Democrats were smart they’d co-promote their convention with Marvel. After all, they share the same audience. Take a look around and you’d see so many fat, sweaty women along with their low-t lady boys that you could easily believe you were at a gross comic book convention.

Girls with blue hair and the horny geeks who love them.

The Democrats come off like the victim of a bullying long-con where the cool kids managed to convince the nerds that they were seriously hip, and then can sit back and with the losers strut around like imbeciles.

Obama’s real legacy isn’t as America’s first black president, but it’s first geek in power, and now the loser’s club finally has some confidence.

So grab your popcorn and watch the sideshow.

My favorite thing about “Ghostbusters” (2016) so far has been everything but the grueling two-hour cinematic castration that I’ll be missing with the kind of enthusiasm typically reserved for skipping out on math class. Summer time is for wet dogs and snow cones, not this; not doing long division while being shouted at by nasty women for not grinning and clapping as my balls are cut-off and fed to a gorilla.

No thank you, not for me.

But would you believe there are men actually into that kind of thing? Who gladly admit their lack of masculine self-respect in public forum, all while defending their terrible sadistic overlords?

It’s true, I’ve seen it!

The pedestrian take on their open display of bullshit- lets be clear, no one like this fucking movie- is that they’ve been paid off by a frightened movie studio fearing disaster.

A more sophisticated interpretation of these geeks tripping over themselves to give “Ghostbusters” a lot of thumbs-up is based in ideology; that the film embodies Progress, and that Progress must always be good. The production team behind the movie had these people in mind when they green lit it, and its box-office success will surely be an early read on the election.

And you explaining that to a real adult and you feel half-retarded, but I’m certain it’s true. I’m certain that the fate of this film holds some degree of major significance regarding the cultural, and yes- political, future of the western world.

But something lies beneath the obsession with ideology: sexual strategy. These poor saps just want to get laid.

Try to imagine yourself as one of these guys- after only a cursory inspection it’s clear that you’re genetically inadequate, but you’re horny and frustrated too. The very same inadequacies that have crushed your self-esteem also indicate a likelihood that you’re cowardly, stupid, and lazy.

You have nothing going for you, and studying examples of more successful men only produces anger and contempt within your vile, fat heart. Competing directly with these cool guys- you know, the type who were gaming teachers in sixth grade like it’s no big thing– is impossible… so the best you could do is to try to win by disqualification!

You position yourself as morally superior while deriding the more sexually successful for lacking the qualities that women say they want.

Foremost, you accumulate thousands of hours of quiet observation- listening to your crying BFF complain about how her bad-boy-of-the-week only wants quick blowies- between negotiating tabs of PornHub and furious masturbation sessions. You could never be her bad boy, and you know it, but you convince yourself- while chugging Code Red and wiping your ass with comic books- that she doesn’t really want a bad boy. I mean, listen to her, she said so! So you signal to her that you’re different; you respect women; you aren’t a dreaded BernieBro, you love Hillary Clinton and girl Ghostbusters- your dick is worthy.

And when your darling little snow-angel, lost in a world of quick sex and hypergamous promiscuity, needs a shoulder to cry on you’d never make her feel guilty for her short-sighted choices.

You signal acceptance, and kindness, and canned Feminist theory, that you’re with Grandma and you fucking loved lady Ghostbusters, all while disqualifying those awful studs for being so one-dimensional for only wanting something as stupid and basic as icky sex… because then maybe the slut will buy the shit you’re selling and fuck you.

Maybe your dick is worthy.

And you cling to this bullshit for the very same reason Hillary desperately needs to trump Donald- it’s all you have… and when the sad tactic of a win by disqualification fails, you’ll cry the very same tears Grandma will face in November.

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