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Cops of Reddit, what is the saddest arrest that you've ever had to make? (self.AskReddit)

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[–]xapco 590ポイント591ポイント  (151子コメント)

I have finally found an opportunity to tell this story.

So a few years ago, I got a call at a skatepark about some kids who were smoking weed. Age was never specified, but when I got there, my partner waited in the car and I looked around until I picked up a funky smell in the air and managed to follow it to behind a little shed at the park. Behind it were four little kids, passing a bag around, huffing whatever was inside. I mean LITTLE kids. Like, 7/8/9. Two of them ran off as soon as they saw me approach. The two that were left looked really ragged, beaten up, smelled like they hadn't showered in weeks, and you could tell from their faces how fucked up they were on whatever it was that they were huffing. I called my partner over, since I saw, and confirmed that one of the kids had a knife on him, although clearly too fucked up to use it. I honestly froze and teared up a little bit, looking at these children who were probably homeless or didn't have a good home to go to at all, looking up at me with their doped-up deer-in-the-headlights look on their faces. My partner was the one who took them away while I picked up the bag out of curiosity to see what it was that was in that brown paper bag. I'll never forget what I saw that day. It was really, really saddening and it honestly brings back some tears writing this out now. In that bag was: the serious tag that OP forgot.

EDIT: My first reddit gold was some bullshit I made up to set up for a bad, unoriginal punchline and I love you all.

[–]dallasmay18 269ポイント270ポイント  (2子コメント)

Dammit

[–]TheInfamousHim 130ポイント131ポイント  (0子コメント)

Fuck

[–]Based_Tee 109ポイント110ポイント  (0子コメント)

God fucking dammit.

[–]OsIrBi 78ポイント79ポイント  (0子コメント)

Fuck you

[–]Sun_Stealer 68ポイント69ポイント  (0子コメント)

You dirty son of a bitch.

[–]Valdrax 86ポイント87ポイント  (6子コメント)

Someone gilded you for this. I'm not sure who should be more ashamed.

[–]bigbur 166ポイント167ポイント  (8子コメント)

This shitty meme isnt even funny anymore it's been beaten to death by unoriginal, uncreative redditors who upvote the same damn joke.

[–]Jowhoof 25ポイント26ポイント  (1子コメント)

How does this shit get gold every time?

[–]Pipthepirate 4ポイント5ポイント  (0子コメント)

Because there are enough people who think they are clever for pointing out nobody asked them to use some situational awareness to determine if it was a silly thread or a not silly thread and then they all jerk each other off for being so clever

[–]stillalone 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

Yeah, it would have been better if he found $3.50 in the bag and one of the kids was bearing physical similarities to a plesiosaur, an extinct order of aquatic reptiles from the Mesozoic era.

[–]dryhumpback -1ポイント0ポイント  (0子コメント)

Shh bby is ok

[–]enoughdakka 349ポイント350ポイント  (5子コメント)

It's a DAE LE SERIOUS TAG comment, dont get rused

[–]Greatwhit3 40ポイント41ポイント  (3子コメント)

You know comments show up under the post, not above it right?

[–]enoughdakka 7ポイント8ポイント  (0子コメント)

You know you don't have to read comments on reddit with the comment you're reading at the very bottom of your screen, right?

[–]roger_ranter 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

That's why he used superscript.

[–]Chaost -1ポイント0ポイント  (0子コメント)

I think that's why he's trying to be bigger.

[–]JUICE_LEE [スコア非表示]  (0子コメント)

Too late! The master ruseman got me!

[–]MjrJWPowell 337ポイント338ポイント  (12子コメント)

You are the reason we can't have good threads. Seriously, you're just a douchebag.

[–]NEEDLE_UP_YOUR_PENIS 46ポイント47ポイント  (3子コメント)

Was gonna say: Go fuck yourself, guy. We shouldn't need a serious tag just to have people post appropriately. Hope ya butt falls off.

[–]cohrt 2ポイント3ポイント  (2子コメント)

We shouldn't need a serious tag

but we do. the serious tag should be applied by default. just because the op forgets to apply it doesn't mean a potentially interesting thread should be ruined by stupid puns and bad jokes.

[–]Ol_Shitcakes_Magoo 0ポイント1ポイント  (1子コメント)

I don't understand why it's such a big deal.

There's a lot of good comments here. Most comments are good and relevant. Just downvote and move on.

[–]cohrt 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

I don't understand why it's such a big deal.

this thread isn't so bad but there are some threads that are completely ruined because idiots can't control themselves and think that no serious tag = time to fill the thread with fake stores, bad puns and three fitty stories.

[–]Cogs13 3ポイント4ポイント  (0子コメント)

Most of the time the only reason we even need a serious tag is because of people like him. If you are interested in writing stories got writing prompts otherwise don't be that guy.

[–]roger_ranter [スコア非表示]  (0子コメント)

Well, he didn't upvote himself 650 times....

[–]Thingymrbob 34ポイント35ポイント  (0子コメント)

You piece of shit

[–]oneevilchicken 105ポイント106ポイント  (6子コメント)

I really wish people would start down voting shit posts like these.

[–]alextoria 47ポイント48ポイント  (3子コメント)

I downvote these every time. I'm with you :(

[–]oneevilchicken 49ポイント50ポイント  (2子コメント)

Like they're not even funny, just a waste of time and are in no way contributing to the conversation. Not every thread needs a serious tag that way you can throw in a joke that contributes to the discussion without it getting deleted.

[–]Plbn_01 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

I always downvote movie references, shitty puns and shit posts like this one

[–]janyk 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

It's all I ever downvote!

[–]kopkiwi 35ポイント36ポイント  (0子コメント)

Prick

[–]ardenture 9ポイント10ポイント  (0子コメント)

I hate you.

[–]preasefanks 23ポイント24ポイント  (8子コメント)

Shame

[–]Madlibsluver 7ポイント8ポイント  (7子コメント)

Shame

[–]littleseasalt 12ポイント13ポイント  (0子コメント)

Wha... How dare you.

[–]ColdLatvianPotato 21ポイント22ポイント  (1子コメント)

If it's bad and unoriginal then why do it at all? It's never funny, just annoying.

[–]Ol_Shitcakes_Magoo 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

You probably read it to the end.

If it was that unoriginal, you wouldn't have known.

[–]thevelvetunderfrown 10ポイント11ポイント  (0子コメント)

Take a fucking hike

[–]sattorie 15ポイント16ポイント  (0子コメント)

what an asshole

[–]arth99 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

Fuck off, it's not fucking funny. No one gives a shit there wasn't a serious tag.

[–]Leharen 8ポイント9ポイント  (0子コメント)

I have no words right now. I can't put into words how much I hate this post.

[–]Greasydorito 17ポイント18ポイント  (1子コメント)

Are you fucking kidding me right meow

[–]Gast8 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

Are you fucking kitten me right meow

[–]BirdKevin 14ポイント15ポイント  (0子コメント)

You win, I'm tearing up man that's some heavy shit

[–]TheSpinningWalrus 4ポイント5ポイント  (0子コメント)

I should've seen it coming god damn it

[–]sniperdude12a 4ポイント5ポイント  (0子コメント)

Son of a bitch

[–]bad_at_passwords 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

  • I love how polarizing these posts are.

  • I apparently don't take this nearly as seriously as most.

[–]ApolloEmu 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

I love you

[–]OkArmordillo 1ポイント2ポイント  (1子コメント)

Downvote all you want, but I think it's funny.

[–]PalapaSlaps [スコア非表示]  (0子コメント)

It's fucking insane how legitimately upset people get over this stuff.

[–]AssFaceTittyMongler 4ポイント5ポイント  (0子コメント)

Ohhhh you motherfucker

[–]2u3e9v 11ポイント12ポイント  (1子コメント)

I hate you!!!!

Seriously. I can't even explain to my girlfriend how I'm shaking my damn phone because she doesn't Reddit. I hate you so fucking much.

[–]PmYourWittyAnecdote -2ポイント-1ポイント  (0子コメント)

You're shaking out of anger at some post on reddit?

[–]Anonymous_user7 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

Shame.

[–]PM_ME_AYY_LMAOS 5ポイント6ポイント  (0子コメント)

Perfection. I was so sad for 90% of that.

[–]DTX41 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

I hear those serious tags get you pretty fucked up if you huff them

[–]Taper13 -1ポイント0ポイント  (1子コメント)

You deserve a medal.

[–]forestdino 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

Damm, got me.

[–]TheLastSparten 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

Why?

[–]Jamies_redditAccount 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

Fuck this place

[–]TiredEngineer 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

Motherfucker !!

[–]Kokiri_Salia 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

People like you used to be the ones natural selection eliminated first. Those were the days...

[–]vickzzzzz 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

You son of a bitch!

[–]fanatiqual 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

First time I was gotten so good I was tearing up, you magnificent motherfucker

[–]lechocco 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

ZZZ

[–]someone0794 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

was this in russia? sounds like children of leningradsky. its a good documentary... and was it glue in the bag?

[–]SirBaconMcPorkchop 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

Maybe it's because I'm not on reddit as much as some people, but I find posts like these to be consistently hilarious. The fact that people are super pissed off at you because they had to read one paragraph that turned out to be a troll will never stop being funny.

[–]Ramrod312 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

Fuck everyone else that was funny. Not sure why you're getting borderline death threats for tricking people on the internet. It's like it's never happened before or something.

[–]Metalworks13 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

Fuck you!

[–]PalapaSlaps [スコア非表示]  (0子コメント)

I can't believe how angry people are about this. Seriously, over this so many people are livid, it boggles the mind. Reddit needs to chill.

[–]BobBobingston [スコア非表示]  (0子コメント)

Eat shit

[–]Primo_uomo [スコア非表示]  (0子コメント)

Asshole.

Edit: fucking asshole

[–]Rihsatra [スコア非表示]  (0子コメント)

All of the replies you're getting are hilarious. Thank you so much for this post.

[–]19southmainco [スコア非表示]  (0子コメント)

u cheeky cunt

[–]Unknownirish [スコア非表示]  (0子コメント)

I hate you

[–]Chocolate-Panda [スコア非表示]  (0子コメント)

you absolute bastard

[–]illonlyusethisonceok -1ポイント0ポイント  (2子コメント)

So this wasn't real?

[–]fortheloveofjorge 12ポイント13ポイント  (1子コメント)

No, it was real. OP forgot his serious tag in a bag after he bought it down at the internet-mart.

[–]fireork12 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

I fucking hate the people that do this shit.

I mean COME ON, WE JUST WANT TO HAVE SOME GOOD STORIES GOD DAMMIT

[–]-negative_creep- 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

Ctfu

[–]brewtown138 -5ポイント-4ポイント  (0子コメント)

Well, here is a up vote.... Jerk

[–]Famixofpower -1ポイント0ポイント  (0子コメント)

SERIOUSLY!!!!!

WHAT THE HELL!!!!

[–]Old-Man-Henderson -1ポイント0ポイント  (0子コメント)

Fuck...

[–]Dexaan -4ポイント-3ポイント  (0子コメント)

Fuck you, take my upvote, asshole

[–]ecordell11 -1ポイント0ポイント  (0子コメント)

You Rick rolled the fuck out of me.

[–]kazizza -4ポイント-3ポイント  (0子コメント)

You are my hero.

[–]NyonMan -2ポイント-1ポイント  (1子コメント)

Bamboozled

[–]Kendo16 -2ポイント-1ポイント  (0子コメント)

Hoodwinked! Shmeckledorfed!

[–]DemiGod9 -1ポイント0ポイント  (0子コメント)

I'm still impressed by that freaking story though

[–]penguinfarts -1ポイント0ポイント  (0子コメント)

You dirty rat bastard.

[–]penguinfarts -1ポイント0ポイント  (0子コメント)

I trusted you.

[–]Mphlol -1ポイント0ポイント  (0子コメント)

You fucking fiend.

[–]VaultToast -1ポイント0ポイント  (0子コメント)

I thought there was going to be fermented turd in the bag or something. Still deciding if I'm disappointed or not.

[–]KnowledgeThirsty -1ポイント0ポイント  (0子コメント)

... Fucking Bravo!

[–]SLEEPWALKING_KOALA -1ポイント0ポイント  (0子コメント)

Get out. I can't decide whether I hate you or not.

[–]VanillaSarsaparilla -1ポイント0ポイント  (0子コメント)

fuck you.

Just....fuck you.

[–]8vincey -1ポイント0ポイント  (0子コメント)

Literally screamed out "FUCK YOU" AHAHAHAHAH

[–]Arkonisas -1ポイント0ポイント  (0子コメント)

Go fucking die, you goddamn asshole. Can't you just answer honsetly. Also what kind of fucking idiot pays money for this tired bullshit ?

[–]ThirdAmbiguousColor -1ポイント0ポイント  (0子コメント)

I still find these mildly amusing because if you give the thread a few more hours to mature, some great stories will rise to the top in its place. And this is a pretty funny placeholder, good jorb doggo 👌🏾👌🏾

[–]PM-Dat-Ass-Girl -4ポイント-3ポイント  (0子コメント)

You know what to do.

[–]mental_mentalist -2ポイント-1ポイント  (0子コメント)

I will kill your fucking cat.

[–]obviousflamebait -3ポイント-2ポイント  (0子コメント)

Beautiful work there.

[–]13_f_cali69 -4ポイント-3ポイント  (0子コメント)

loved it, don't know why everyone is getting so upset. A+ tom foolery

[–]ViolentThespian -2ポイント-1ポイント  (1子コメント)

You fucking cocksucker. Here I am getting emotionally invested in the story and then you tear my heart out with bullshit.

[–]Jebus-Crust -2ポイント-1ポイント  (0子コメント)

Damn it, not again!

[–]ButtCrackMcGee -2ポイント-1ポイント  (0子コメント)

Must be channeling Vargas or something. That was good. You got me.

[–]ZombiePope -2ポイント-1ポイント  (0子コメント)

This is such a shitpost i saw it being huffed as jenkem by orphans.

[–]WOTDcuntology -2ポイント-1ポイント  (0子コメント)

asshole. upvotes

[–]MiamiPower -3ポイント-2ポイント  (0子コメント)

Smells like some seriously golden shit meng.

[–]BamaboyinUT -3ポイント-2ポイント  (0子コメント)

Kudos, good sir (or ma'am or whatever pronoun you prefer). Kudos.

[–]jaythecat69 -3ポイント-2ポイント  (2子コメント)

What was in the bag, a shark or something?

[–]SadGhoster87 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

No, it was tree fiddy.

[–]Soldier1317 -3ポイント-2ポイント  (0子コメント)

The serious tag that OP forgot.