Why did you join the Army? What's your MOS?

I'm leaving after 9 years tomorrow on disability so let me offer you some gems of knowledge to help you:

1) immediately start investing in retirement. Unless the TSP Roth matches contributions (I doubt it) use Vanguard's Roth IRA. Avoid TSP at all costs.

2) keep an emergency fund handy but most of your savings should go into an Index500 or something. You will make money and lose money but don't touch it when times get bad for the account. Leave it alone and you'll leave 20 years of active with a LOT of cash.

3) go to college while in. Tuition Assistance is free and even taking 1 class a semester will set you above your peers.

4) you will eventually make rank up to SGT. Study for the board when you are PFC, learn and go to Soldier of the Month boards.

5) Do NOT get caught up in drama/politics. People can and will sell you the fuck out. You will witness this in Basic and AIT. CYA. Cover Your Ass

6) Don't let anyone shame you into seeking help for medical or mental health issues. If it's still broken, keep going back even if they said nothing we can do for you. The VA has decided that several issues I have aren't worth disability because I stopped going when they told me to "nothing more we can do."

7) do not buy a fancy fucking car. Buy used, but simple, and affordable for payments. Avoid places right off post. Get the loan through your bank (USAA) and do not, I repeat do NOT, feel guilty for walking off a lot. USAA actually has a car buying service that gives you some cash back for buying through them and they only use approved vendors. I bought my car 2k under true value using USAA

8) If you are single, don't buy a shitload of toys for your barracks room. Don't go out every weekend or eat out every day. You'll hemorrhage money this way. If you're married, USAA has the same service for homes.

9) get it in your head that you WILL deploy at some point. It's not that bad. Try not to get complacent as it is the real killer doe range.

10) keep copies of everything like orders (PCS, Awards, Schools) certificates and stuff in an "I love me" book. This will save your ass at some point.

11) you signed up for 8 years regardless. You can do it active or however long you signed up for and the rest IRR/NG/AR. I'd do it active. There are more benefits.

12) don't date strippers

13) wear protection. Sex wise and stuff like eye pro/ hearing pro

14) your leaders may be shitty, be professional. Remember you don't have any privileges or entitlement here. As Gunny Emry said in Full Metal Jacket "Here you are all equally worthless."

15) people will say not to volunteer. I say do, but ask your first line supervisor first. Someone who volunteers a lot gets a lot of better gigs. Ie: you've picked up trash and shoveled snow off parking lots for a bit. Next time you volunteer you might get picked for something cool like seats needing to be filled at a baseball game.

16) carry yourself with pride, but not with hubris.

17) make friends, network, learn other people's jobs. The more value you bring to the table, the better off you will be.

18) don't eat crappy food 24/7.

19) sleep if you can. The worst offender for shit in the military is lack of sleep.

20) back to college, your Basic and AIT will count for college courses. Look up DODJST when you get out of AIT and send those transcripts to your college. You'll get a few credits.

21) no one wants to hear excuses. Say "Roger" or "My mistake, how can I fix it" instead of defending yourself.

22) complain down, not up

23) know what you can change and what you cannot. Do not dedicate the energy worrying about something you can not change or whatever. You'll drive yourself crazy and exhausted doing otherwise.

24) you will become jaded and hate life eventually. Rediscover why you joined and being that passion back.

25) get used to seeing the same sex naked. Also get used to being uncomfortably close to them during such time.

26) you will get sick in Basic and AIT. Don't be afraid to go to sick call, but be cautious because you might get worse thanks to people with no fucking hygiene etiquette like covering mouths when sneezing or coughing.

27) enjoy what you can. I've been to Germany, The Netherlands, Japan, and Australia on military assignments. It was awesome. Space A is essentially a free plane ticket. Look into it. You will also move a lot, so options will always change. ASK is on AKO and let's you select preference of duty station.

28) some times will suck more than others. This is where you will bond with your squad/team and come out stronger

29) want to make some extra cash in the field? Bring tobacco (cigarettes AND dip) and sell it at a mark up. You'll make friends and turn profit.

30) best field item are small water boilers that help make coffee and ramen. I also pack a bucket. It fits in the bottom of your duffel and takes no extra room

31) keep EVERYTHING the army gives you. If you loan it out, write up a 2062 and had the person sign it. You will have to turn (most of) it in at several points. Also clean it.

32) push yourself for PT but don't let the bullshit get to you. Know the difference between pain and hurting. You can push through hurt, pain is needing to see a doctor

33) you cannot sue anyone in the military for botching medical issues or getting Hurt. It's called Frey's law or something. Be careful

34) ask yourself "can I get caught? How bad will it be if I do?" Before you do something like smoke weed, drink and drive etc.

35) No means no. You will be briefed this every week, yet every week there is some type of sexual assault in the military. If it happens to you, report it. No counts as No even if you're right about to cum, and she/he says stop. The next thrust is rape.

36) always look presentable. Appearances are everything

37) do as I say, not as I do. Don't bitch that I'm not doing it.

38) get used to cleaning bathrooms, offices, picking up cigarette butts and doing stupid tasks.

39) your rifle should be an extension of you regardless if your combat arms or not. Learn your weapon, CLEAN your weapon even if no one says to do it. Clean the star cluster because everyone checks there.

40) you'll probably end up fucking someone in your unit unless your married (or even if). Be careful.

41) be who you are and embrace your individuality, but don't let it be the rust spot on a clean sheet of steel.

42) get everything concerning your career on paper and save it. S1 will fuck up your ERB and you need to produce whatever paperwork they need to fix it.

43) never give anyone your last copy of said paperwork.

44) don't wear a mustache. Everyone fucking hates them. Only real exception is Movember and in the field.

45) you are active duty on and off leave, on and off duty, on and off post. Don't do something stupid that you'll regret.

46) EVERYONE fucks up. It'll be OK. Learn from it.

47) don't harbor grudges. That specialist you hate may become your NCOIC at some point.

48) if you don't like your job, change it. Check the Star MOS and BEAR sheet that retention should have. Don't reenlist for STAR and BEAR MOS'. You can do those without having to reenlist. Reenlist for money, stabilization, duty station, or whatever.

49) not everyone gets an award. Remember this. Also your awards will mostly be bittersweet. You'll think you deserve more but you won't get it based on your rank. So what.

50) lastly, besides asking for help and ignoring barracks lawyers (remember, go to IG if it breaks regulation and FMs do not count as regulations) when you need it, try to make the most of it. I joined with just t clothes and a Walkman/Discman. I now have a wife, two kids, 2 cars, and a house. I made the right decisions at the right time. You'll know when this is. Have fun when you can, enjoy the small things like the sunsets in the field or the cool crisp mornings as you are rucking 12 miles or whatever. You'll make memories, friends and lose both with PTSD. You'll see yourself change. Embrace it. I went from super passive aggressive to aggressively tackling situations that come to my attention.

Good luck. I don't go into the Army Reddit but I'm sure you can get help there if you need it. You can ask me, I'll tell you how it is for what it is.

Remember, whatever reason you chose to put on the uniform is yours and yours only. Because you're patriotic and the guy next to you just needed a job does not make him less of a soldier than you. Be proud of who you are and what you do, but don't brag about it. You are the 1% of 1% and are brave for signing up.

Good luck, have fun.