Both sides of this issue are missing a bigger picture and point.

Except for one point (explain below), Government has no business in licensing marriage at all. Government should have no say in the matter on any social or religious union. It is only big government regulation minded bureaucrats that want to tax that want marriage licensing.

As it stands before all this gay marriage nonsense anyone could join in a mutual contact over property or what have you. That isn't a reason to have government specifically involved in marriage. If you wanted, you could sign an agreement that grants mutal power of attorney and mutual property ownership, etc. You could do that before gay marriage was "legal".

So what reason would govenment have to be involved specifically in marriage? There is only one reason there would need to be specific law about marriage that couldn't be satisfied with common contract law. There is no other contact law that exists in which a new person is formed into existence. The contractual protection of a new citizen minor is the only place for government in marriage law.

Therefore there is no need for gay marriage law as there is no precedent for gay couples for creating new citizens. If they adopt, then legal agreements can be entered into at that time, or if insemination is performed then legal agreements can then be made, otherwise there is no point to government involvement in marriage at all beyond common contract law.

The whole issue is off mark on both sides.

The flammatory nature of this issue is in trying to regulate and legislate the social acceptance of gay relationships. While there is definitely improvement that can be made in regards to tolerance of other's practices, historically it has proven to be a dangerous slippery slope to attempt to legislate and institutionalized social acceptance. And if you are so gung-ho about having the government force others to accept your position at the expense of their own counter beliefs beware the power and precedent you grant that government for one day you or your children will find themselves on the wrong side of that force. Very dangerous power to grant.