全 13 件のコメント

[–]Big_Gay_Ganondorf 3ポイント4ポイント  (5子コメント)

The field reports are the equivalent of those 'IT REALLY WORKS!!!' fat loss adverts. With so many of them, it's clear to see they are little more red pill fanfic, as they are desperate for validation that their unfounded beliefs make sense somehow.

Just think for a moment. If red pill was actually true, don't you think that a) we already would have figured this out by now, considering how long men and women have been interacting, and b) actual scientists and psychologists would agree with it?

It's a power fantasy dressed up to appeal to young guys looking for the 'secret'

[–]Frrrosty[S] 0ポイント1ポイント  (4子コメント)

I agree with everything you say except for the equivalence to "it really works" advertisements, as these are (allegedly) real people who aren't being paid to say these things.

[–]Big_Gay_Ganondorf 0ポイント1ポイント  (3子コメント)

They aren't getting paid in money, sure - but they are getting validation, respect from a community they want to feel a part of, and they are lending legitimacy to it.

It's like a "if we can make enough people believe it, then it will be true!" attitude.

[–]Frrrosty[S] 0ポイント1ポイント  (2子コメント)

Ah, I see. Still, I don't think online respect is enough for thousands of men to outright lie about these things.

[–]WestsideMoonWalkerKing of the Chadettes 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

I think you are severely underestimating how much lonely people who tend to be socially awkward crave validation. It's something that captivates a lot of people if they aren't aware of it.

[–]Big_Gay_Ganondorf 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

Check out the sunk cost fallacy. It's a recognised phenomenon, where people don't want to think something they have invested time or resources in is actually useless or detrimental.

[–]WestsideMoonWalkerKing of the Chadettes 2ポイント3ポイント  (3子コメント)

First off, I came across TRP and TBP at 18, so I kinda see what you are going through. I'll have more on that later.

some of the theory and field reports make me wonder if there's some legitimacy to it all.

Like? I dunno about you, but for me, in my relationship, if I acted the way TRP says to, I would be dropped like a rock. If my girlfriend acted the way TRP describes all women to be, I would drop her faster than you can finish this sentence. I can't take it seriously because it literally doesn't work for any well-adjusted people. Most of the field reports are absolutely lies. They read like shitty fan-fiction written by 15 year olds.

It seems to be working in a positive way for lots of men, so what am I missing? I am well aware that TRPers get stuck in a feedback loop of "attract damaged/untrustworthy girls, bang them, toy with them to get them to bang you some more". That being said, many arguments I've heard have been that it isn't ethical.

The fact that it makes them toxic, and the fact that most of them are lying through their teeth. The head mod of TRP is a whiny, sniveling 30 year old manchild who had a breakdown because some people on an red pill affiliated sub disagreed with him on whether to marry or not. The way that most Terpers act, they would get dropped like a rock by anyone who has any self respect. Their views on sex are toxic as fuck too. They literally view sex as a way to exert power over someone (which is an interesting parallel with rapists, who view sex in the same way. Not that all Twerps are rapists, but they are much more likely to view sex in that way than most). Do you really want to turn into someone that is that disconnected from other people? How would you feel if someone made sex about power with you and used it to exert control over you? Bad, right? Anyone who sees sex in that manner (regardless of gender) is toxic and doesn't deserve your time.

That isn't to say that casual sex is bad if that is what you want. However, at the same time, you can have casual sex without making sex about exerting control over someone, or having power over them)

To many people, not just TRPers, regardless of if something is ethical or not, if it works in a way that is beneficial to them, they will still employ it.

There are also many many people who act ethically because it is advantageous not only to them, but to everyone else as well. The thing that most Twerps don't understand is that acting like a massive twat (like they are predisposed to) may not have consequences now, but will absolutely screw them in the long term when they wreck all their relationships with others. Eventually, if someone is selfish enough, people will absolutely get fed up with their bullshit and just decide to not deal with them anymore.

I have yet to see a highly upvoted consensus of why RP theory doesn't work the way it's supposed to.

It is basically snake oil. It doesn't really work due to a multitude of reasons, and many of them are because the theory literally is garbage. Very few, if any TRP types even understand the studies they look at. There are multiple sidebar writings by white nationalists. Think about it. The theory literally has no problem with being represented by people who are stuck in pre-Civil War America (with regards to their mentality on race and gender).

There is nothing special about some parts of TRP theory. The advice of eat right, work out, dress well, get hobbies, and put yourself out there is shit that basically everyone knows. The rest of it is unnecessary drivel that actually hinders your ability to form lasting, healthy relationships.

Anyway, story time. When I was about your age, I had just discovered TBP and TRP. At the time, I fell for a girl I liked. By all accounts, she seemed pretty great at first. She cheated on me within a month. I took her back, stupidly, but things were toxic and we broke up a little while later. I quite literally dated someone who was a caricature of TRP's view of women, and she was my very first girlfriend no less. You know why I didn't turn to TRP? Because even sitting there, wallowing in the pain of heartbreak, I could look at the theory critically and see that it was not applicable at all to any type of relationship I wanted to form. A TRP relationship sounds fucking exhausting honestly. Within the next month, I ended up hooking up with someone else. That didn't turn into anything, but by all accounts, my interactions with her were very non-Twerpy, and the reason it didn't work it is because I didn't want to pursue anything.

Less than a month after that, I started seeing someone else, an ex-friend of my first girlfriend. I am still with her today and our relationship has been nothing short of perfect. It is everything I ever could have hoped for in a relationship and more. She treats me better than I could ever have imagined, and I do the same for her. If I pulled TRP tactics with her, she would be out so quick that I wouldn't know what happened, and if she acted in a similar manner (since TRP often says that women are naturally red pill), she would be a goner. One of the hallmarks of a healthy relationship is a high level of mutual respect. If you can look at the other person and say to yourself that you believe in them and their values, trust them fully, and know that they would be supportive of you in a tough spot, you know you are with someone who is worth it. It's a very abstract idea, but relationships are an abstract concept at heart.

TRP never talks about this, and actually dismisses it, because it doesn't fit their narrow biotruth driven world view.

Plus, on top of it all, the folks at Married Red Pill (who are shitty in their own way) think that most of the advice on the main TRP sub is pretty shitty because it comes from insecure teenagers, and they are actually right about it. MRP isn't better. They don't know anything about what an emotionally intimate and healthy relationship is either, but it's telling that older Twerps think younger Twerps are absolute idiots.

[–]Frrrosty[S] 0ポイント1ポイント  (2子コメント)

I think most TRPers go through similar relationships that cause them to look for easy answers. My first girlfriend was incredibly manipulative and more or less "proved" RP theory, since I was pretty emotionally needy, but it wasn't one sided at all.

[–]WestsideMoonWalkerKing of the Chadettes 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

I mean, you read what I wrote about my first girlfriend. She was very manipulative, and I was not in a place where I had proper boundaries. Being isn't the worst thing, but some people take advantage of that if you let them. Teenagers are especially shitty with regards to mind games and the like. I mean, my ex quite literally was a TRP caricature and I could still see that the theory is bullshit. She was pretty damn codependent too. So yea, it really wasn't one sides for me either. Either way, the big issue is being disrespectful of boundaries. Setting proper boundaries and enforcing them is an extremely important skill, but of course, that is not TRP specific either.

[–]CharaSm 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

The thing you have to realize is that manipulative, shitty behavior isn't exclusive to women. The common adage is "all men cheat" (boys will be boys riiiiiight?) but as a woman I don't believe that garbage because I know that there are very good men out there who are worth being with, and that believing absolutes like that lets poor behavior off the hook in a way.

Do what you want, but first ask yourself if you want your future relationships to be smothered in paranoia, bitterness, and exhausting power struggles. Or would you prefer fulfilling, loving, stable relationships that work on the basis of mutual trust and respect?

[–]TripleJam 0ポイント1ポイント  (1子コメント)

There can be problems with relationships that have nothing to do with what you may think. RP isn't going to save you if there is a specific problem. It may not even be your fault, the relationship might just not work out.

Also, I can't say I know a lot about feminism but I would try looking into some of it. One problem RP seems to have is a capitalistic mindset. When I recently started to explore more socialist ideas, accepting at least some feminist concepts is a logical inevitability.

[–]Frrrosty[S] 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

A logical inevitably? That's a pretty tall horse you're on, bud.

[–]EmilyCharland 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

Umm it doubt it really works.

If it does, it's placebo which causes people who always had the ability to find partners to get more confident. But you can work on your confidence (as well as everything else TRP tells you to do like work out and dress well) without ruining your life and personality.