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[–]kingchoopa 39ポイント40ポイント  (76子コメント)

So, I'm afraid I'm becoming a nice guy. I'm older. I have an amazing wife and we have an amazing relationship. There is no one else whom I want to grow old with.

But recently I have been meeting women that are so hot that it makes me angry. Like unreasonably upset. These women seem nice enough. But I think niceguy bullshit is intruding my thoughts. Just from having beautiful girls talk to me and knowing that I will never sleep with them is turning me hostile.

I feel bad about this and I wanted to admit it to a judgmental audience.

[–]roald_head_dahl 23ポイント24ポイント  (2子コメント)

I wonder if this is more an aging thing, and a refusal to take responsibility thing, than a nice-guy thing (though the responsibility thing is definitely a Nice Guy trait). Like, you're getting older, you're settled into a relationship you will DIE in, and right now, even hot girl you meet represents an option you didn't take. You have to work through that on your own.
Getting angry at these women isn't taking responsibility for your feelings. It's not fair to place it on them for existing. That's super shitty. Admitting it's irrational is the first step. Now you gotta figure out what underlying feelings shit you have going on, and work through that.

(That said, I have a friend who is RIDICULOUSLY hot. Like Instagram girl hot. But she's also one of the sweetest women I know. And it makes me irrationally angry that I can't hate her, on a superficial level? So I get it, but I think the difference is whether you know it's ridiculous and it's on a superficial level, or if it's going to fester resentment in you and make you a shitty old man.)

[–]xboxer102 14ポイント15ポイント  (0子コメント)

What is making you upset about that? Just that you can't have them?

[–]bolognahole 11ポイント12ポイント  (0子コメント)

I have an amazing wife

Just from having beautiful girls talk to me and knowing that I will never sleep with them is turning me hostile.

Fuckin cock-blocked by marriage again!

[–]Walking_the_dead 62ポイント63ポイント  (25子コメント)

You're turning into a huge dick and a step away from a red piller, telling us will do shit, go seek actual help

[–]GhostlyFireCunt 15ポイント16ポイント  (0子コメント)

You need counseling and marriage counseling stat.

[–]dylang92 4ポイント5ポイント  (0子コメント)

This doesn't really sound like NiceGuyness because you don't think that you're not going to be able to sleep with them because you are nice. You are more or less struggling in the relationship with your wife and being tempted by other women. It happens more often than you think.

[–]ariagrayx 3ポイント4ポイント  (0子コメント)

I'm a bit late to the party but it seems like you just need to go to counselling and figure out why you hate women for being hot.

Everyone has to deal with being attracted to hot women. Everyone is attracted to hot women, even straight women. Everyone runs in to people they would/want to fuck every day.

Your issue is that you, for some reason, get angry at the women for existing and talking to you / being nice to you. I would say that you're right for calling this a niceguy thing. But where does it come from? Is it just that you're sad that you can't fuck young hot women? I mean that would be a normal emotion, and maybe it's turned into anger as a defence mechanism. I only say that because most niceguy activity is a defence mechanism against self-improvement (i.e. blaming the girl), so your anger is probably also a defence mechanism. Again, go to therapy.

[–]gkr974 4ポイント5ポイント  (0子コメント)

This just sounds like either misdirected anger or that you're being triggered, or a combination of the two. You're angry about something -- maybe it's that you're feeling your age and resent the idea that you'll never get to sleep with these attractive women, maybe it's something in the relationship, maybe there's some relationship you had in the past the left you with unresolved issues, who knows? But the interactions with these women are triggering that anger.

The good news is you're aware of this, and you're aware that it's unreasonable. I suspect that if you figure out the root of why you're being triggered or what's really making you angry, that will help you unwind the issue, bring it into your consciousness, and make it easier to guard against the unreasonable reactions.

But no, I don't think this makes you a "nice guy" at all.

[–]Whatnow666 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

Yeah... You need to consider therapy...

[–]__notmythrowaway__ 11ポイント12ポイント  (34子コメント)

You're probably experiencing what any married person experiences. Nothing wrong with being friends with hot chicks and flirting all the time. Your wife will love you even more if she knows you could tap that ass but you're holding off. Just don't act on anything, unless you're ready to deal with the consequences.

[–]MrsClaireUnderwood 5ポイント6ポイント  (12子コメント)

I don't think his post was serious...

[–]kingchoopa 2ポイント3ポイント  (11子コメント)

Nope. It's serious.

[–]MrsClaireUnderwood 38ポイント39ポイント  (10子コメント)

I'm not sure this sub is the correct place for your shit, especially since you're already married and say you have a good relationship.

Classic NiceGuy can't achieve that.

[–]kingchoopa 2ポイント3ポイント  (9子コメント)

Ha. Thanks I think? It is niceguy though. I have no right to be mad at these girls. And it's the niceguy phenomenon that makes me angry that I'm not fucking them.

[–]hobochicfantastic 37ポイント38ポイント  (0子コメント)

Maybe work on your views of women a bit. I know you have a wife but maybe you're starting to get a bit unhappy with your relationship. Talk to her about it. And it seems like you are maybe starting to see women as just something to fuck. That's the problem.

[–]MrsClaireUnderwood 25ポイント26ポイント  (1子コメント)

Nah, I think you're just an asshole.

Edit: sorry, self-aware asshole. That first portion differentiates you from NiceGuy status. :)

[–]kingchoopa 3ポイント4ポイント  (0子コメント)

Haha. I'll take "self-aware asshole" any day. That's exactly how I feel.

[–]margethemouse 16ポイント17ポイント  (0子コメント)

You could try posting in /r/confessions or /r/OffMyChest if you'd like a bigger audience who might give you some insight and advice.

[–][deleted] 8ポイント9ポイント  (0子コメント)

Refreshingly honest! Niceguys are the ones that don't have the critical faculties to think this stuff through or to examine themselves. I think you're thoughts are entirely normal and natural. We are all obsessed with hot girls. The human race is obsessed with hot girls. I'm exactly the same, I hate them sometimes because I'll never be one. But Iike you I realise that and I deal with it, rather than commenting stuff like "eat a sandwich, bitch," on bikini models' Instagram photos.

[–]Avaese 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

I have no right to be mad at these girls. And it's the niceguy phenomenon that makes me angry that I'm not fucking them.

This right there means you are not a NiceGuy, because you are probably not acting out on it (being nasty or acting as someones friend to fuck them), and you seem like you feel ashamed of it and know its not a way you want to be thinking. NiceGuys think its NORMAL to think this way, and act on the thoughts.

[–]Exilon1 2ポイント3ポイント  (2子コメント)

Wait. Are you mad at them or upset with yourself? Because that makes a difference.

[–]kingchoopa 0ポイント1ポイント  (1子コメント)

honestly, its bad. This is usually the sequence of events. I realize i'm getting flirted with, then i'm mad at them, because they know i'm happily married,

then i get mad at them for having a significantly easier life than mine, and now trying to make my more difficult life even harder,

and then i get mad at myself for being mad at a nice girl that is probably just being nice to me.

[–]candle_and_bra 4ポイント5ポイント  (0子コメント)

Some people are just naturally flirty, they might not even notice they're doing it.

Edit:jesus just saw your other comments, you sound like a petulant child.

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