Fellow men and you filth of the lesser sex,

I decided a couple weeks back to follow the MGTOW philosophy and ran out on my wife of nearly thirty years and my daughter. I hopped into my old Volvo sedan and started to drive to London.

Instantly, I noticed incredible results. As I crossed the border into England, I decided to pop off into Chester, where I went into a bar for a few drinks. All the men there congratulated me, and some of the women, and the bartender even gave me a pint on the house.

I continued south on the M6 for a while and, to avoid the toll, drove into Birmingham. I saw an advertisement for some nightclub, and it hit me that since I'd come down with oneitis, I hadn't been clubbing since the early '80s. I pulled off and drove around until I found a promising club, parked, and approached. Despite the fact that this was clearly a club for young people, and I'm past 55, the bouncer let me in without a second glance. Once I was in, I approached some young babe closer to my daughter's age than my wife's and told her I'd ditched my family because women are scum. She immediately led me to a lavatory and gave me a blowjob in the stall.

I left the club and left Birmingham via the M40, so I could swing by Oxford University. I popped off onto campus and found my daughter's roommate. I negged her a bit and told her about AWALT and she took me back to her room and let me fuck her and even put it in her arse. I then went and wrote and published a paper about AWALT and MGTOW and got every bird in the University so wet they all wanted to fuck me, but I only fucked the five hottest. The paper was so good that I was given a doctorate on the spot and offered a position as the head of their STEM science department. I accepted, and now I pull in half a million quid a year. My car was taken and replaced with a mint-condition Jaguar E-Type from the early '60s. In addition, an emergency by-election was called, and I was elected MP with 69% of the vote. Tomorrow I'm driving to London to accept the knighthood I was just offered. And all because I followed the path of MGTOW.