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top 200 commentsshow 500
[–]Shangrilama 3891 points3892 points3893 points  (224 children)
You're not stuck unless you let yourself be stuck...not with that person, or that job, or that life. You can change it if you have the guts, and it's better to do it when you know it is intolerable than to try to 'stick it out' hoping things will get better. They only get better if you make them better.
[–]suckafuckduck 2267 points2268 points2269 points  (80 children)
wow dude thanks! time to go dump my gf
[–]xaxaxaxa4u 544 points545 points546 points  (22 children)
/u/fuckswithducks can be your new SO
[–]suckafuckduck 375 points376 points377 points  (17 children)
I wish :( lol but he has a drunk gf who is upset at losing in connect four.
[–]Happy_Bridge 143 points144 points145 points  (32 children)
Unless you are stuck because you signed up for 4 years in the Navy in Oklahoma, of course.
[–]beckyburrow 128 points129 points130 points  (18 children)
I'm going to jump on the bandwagon and say that I really needed to read this as well. I've spent over a year in a job that makes me miserable because I thought that being miserable now is better than taking a risk.
[–]rowrowyothrowaway 199 points200 points201 points  (2 children)
I love this and needed to read it today. Thank you!
[–]lostjules 1256 points1257 points1258 points  (62 children)
Leave those credit card applications alone. You have no income, idiot.
[–]wusol 3298 points3299 points3300 points  (782 children)
If you join the Navy, you will spend 4.5 years of your life lonely and depressed and out at sea in a radar maintenance room listening to loud radar noise, counting the days until you get out.
[–]Hatch- 1632 points1633 points1634 points  (330 children)
Mine:
If you join the Air Force, you will spend 4 years of your life lonely and depressed with only a bunch of college coeds to comfort you. It's really the best possible way to spend the depressed years IMO.
Edit: Just like this: http://i.imgur.com/QZrLLPi.gif
But instead of money, it was labia.
[–]mytotalwaraccount 201 points202 points203 points  (9 children)
only college coeds to comfort you.
Air Force: banging your girl back home so you don't have to.
[–]LargeTeethHere 13 points14 points15 points  (2 children)
I don't get it. Do you mean that your wife travels with you if you're in the air force?
Edit: I get the joke and thanks for the info on traveling wives below!
[–]madogvelkor 21 points22 points23 points  (0 children)
Yes, usually. Maybe not Bagram, but the others, sure. It's not like the Navy where you get stuck on a ship, or the Army and Marines where you get sent to some base in a combat zone.
But that doesn't stop Air Force wives from sleeping around, of course. They just don't wait for their husbands to get deployed.
[–]719_CO 215 points216 points217 points  (45 children)
They got me for six . Shit !
[–]PM_ME_YOUR_FEETS_PLS 83 points84 points85 points  (39 children)
Haha fellow Air Force joiner from same area code. Did your recruiters last name start with an L?
[–]josh841854 24 points25 points26 points  (36 children)
Also from CO, You two have no idea what you are getting into. just please tell me you didnt go security forces?
[–]meowhahaha 1558 points1559 points1560 points  (199 children)
If you are a female and join the USAF, your first combat skill will be learning how to fight off the male airmen who are supposed to be your battle buddies. If you succeed, you get a new nickname - man-hating dyke!
[–]Mgsoloist 887 points888 points889 points  (73 children)
If you're a female and join the Army...well. May God have mercy on your soul, you slut. I hear the rumors. I know you slept with 1SG. You think you're gonna get ahead, huh? Because you know you could never get promoted any other way. Females have no place here.
Why won't you sleep with me, bitch? I'm a nice guy. What, you think you're too good for me? Let me knock you down a peg or two.
In reality, I'm married and sleeping with nobody but my husband, but shit gets fuckin hostile. There's a lot of guys that are really cool and will defend me and my name til the end of days. And the others who think that females are only there for their convenience.
[–]CVance1 323 points324 points325 points  (38 children)
That sounds absolutely soul-crushing to deal with on a daily basis.
[–]Mgsoloist 183 points184 points185 points  (25 children)
On a daily basis...eh. Not so much. It's not like I'm getting berated every day. But it does happen, and it does seriously suck. Especially the "you only got promoted because you sucked and fucked your way there." Like no. Promotions to a point are automatic, and after that you only promote if you have the score and experience and know your shit.
[–]Deltahotel_ [score hidden]  (8 children)
You're probably just catching flak because they aren't happy with what they've got. Can't get laid, can't make rank, their MOS sucks, blahblahblah and they wanna pin it on you because then they don't have to feel responsible for it. They wanna make E4 or whatever and they think they're entitled to it, and then you get ahead and they assume it's because you're a chick and you fucked someone but really they just suck and they're butthurt.
[–]Mgsoloist [score hidden]  (6 children)
That's exactly it. Shit, E4 is automatic if you're not a complete fucking idiot. Wanna know why I picked up? Because I've been in longer than you, ya fuckin shower shoe. Someone else's success shouldn't make a person so insecure that they have to do shit like that, but whatever. Things will be how they are I guess.
[–]mytotalwaraccount 425 points426 points427 points  (37 children)
Every male airman thinks he's Tom Cruise. "You're a cook with a buzz cut. Put your hair net back on and wash the dishes."
[–]BadBadBrownStuff 158 points159 points160 points  (22 children)
Not all of them are so daring. I'm sure some aspire to be Goose.
[–]CookingWithoutWater 1001 points1002 points1003 points  (278 children)
Or, worse, you can get stationed in Oklahoma City. In the Navy. In Oklahoma City.
Edit: Just to be clear, I am not in the Navy. My buddy from college dropped out and joined the Navy. "I'm going to be a Seal," said buddy. Sure buddy, sure. Now buddy is stationed in OKC, and our conversations typically begin and end with how awful OKC is, and how funny (for me) it is that he joined the Navy and is stationed there. But, stupid is as stupid does; he just signed on for 6 more years. That sweet retirement package though if you can make it to 20 years...
I on the other hand, made a similarly stupid decision and went to graduate school... but I can insist on people calling me Dr. now. So that's cool.
Edit2: The use of "stupid" and the "Dr." thing is clearly sarcastic. So here: /s.
[–]jus10beare 419 points420 points421 points  (162 children)
Let's fire up the Oklahoma hate karma train again. God that place is hell on Earth.
[–]Tsw159 223 points224 points225 points  (76 children)
I live in Oklahoma :(
[–]TheTaoOfBill 719 points720 points721 points  (46 children)
You're probably ugly then. Everyone in Oklahoma is ugly.
[–]BadBadBrownStuff 108 points109 points110 points  (5 children)
That's not fair. At least let him show his ugliness before you judge him.
[–]Prison_Vape 239 points240 points241 points  (4 children)
No one wants to see that mess.
[–]wombocombo86 66 points67 points68 points  (22 children)
Or you can join the active duty army, get assigned to an infantry unit, and deploy every other year. 1 year on, 1 year off, 1 year on, 1 year off, etc etc etc. Longest one was 15 months. Been twice but i know a lot of guys at my old unit who's been 3-5 deployments from 2003-2013. 1 army deployment = 2 deployments for you navy/af/marine people. Pick your poison, but the navy/airforce is a much safer choice imo.
and the 1 year off we get. most of that time is spent in training. out of the year, i'd say a good 3-4 months of it was spent in the field. sometimes 1 month at a time, sometimes 3 days, sometimes weeks, with no showers no nothing
[–]lurw 104 points105 points106 points  (33 children)
100 dB? Are you wearing ear protection? Otherwise that will fuck with your hearing after a short while (days, not weeks).
[–]Tyrango 703 points704 points705 points  (78 children)
Do that exciting thing before you have too many responsibilities to not be able to do the thing..
[–]dum_dums 138 points139 points140 points  (12 children)
I'm getting some very mixed signals in this thread
[–]TheHomelesDepot [score hidden]  (7 children)
It seems like every time this question is asked half the people say save your money and stay in school while the other half say take a semester off and spend all your money traveling. Very mixed signals indeed.
[–]Lexinoz [score hidden]  (0 children)
Well, to be fair, none of these signals are meant for /u/dum_dums or you. They're meant for young versions of themselves, and they know what they needed to change for their life to be better at that time.
[–]jennthemermaid 189 points190 points191 points  (37 children)
I agree 100%. I always followed this advice in my head. I thought at 22...if I get hit by a truck tomorrow, I will have traveled, etc!
I have told my dad so many times, "But, dad! This is a once-in-a-lifetime-opportunity and I have to go!"
He didn't always agree, but I went anyway. And, I'm SO glad I did! I've had more cool experiences that a lot of people I know.
Live now, while you can.
[–]CitizenOi 13 points14 points15 points  (6 children)
You always can. It's awesome that people take steps in there early youth to do cool shit but there's no reason to stop. It's not like it ever ends, it's just people choose to do things that tie them down.
Nothing wrong with that, it's just not a set path.
[–]Icarus_Jones 1198 points1199 points1200 points  (48 children)
Read a few books on personal finance, and quit pissing your money away.
[–]EnricoPalazz0 564 points565 points566 points  (74 children)
That getting that sweet tribal band tattoo will be the decision you come to regret most.
[–]jennthemermaid 129 points130 points131 points  (44 children)
Oh, God. I concur. I have a stupid tattoo that's not cool anymore. The only saving grace is that it is located in a place no one can see it unless I show it. I wish I would have listened to my mom.
[–]shittyunamehere 541 points542 points543 points  (7 children)
At 35+, if a bad tattoo is your biggest regret, you're probably ahead of the game.
[–]Narissis 43 points44 points45 points  (4 children)
I know a guy with "WEST SIDE" tattooed in two-inch-high Old English font across his solar plexus.
He's a Redditor, too; let's see if he finds this comment.
[–]VaginaFishSmell 4067 points4068 points4069 points  (151 children)
Wear a rubber, moron.
[–]holyslot 1051 points1052 points1053 points  (29 children)
But you liked how you smelled afterwards.
[–]deathbunny69 946 points947 points948 points  (33 children)
hi dad
[–]VaginaFishSmell 720 points721 points722 points  (29 children)
Enh sorry i never called. I just now found out you existed.
[–]Anima_Honorem 274 points275 points276 points  (25 children)
Well, that got dark.
[–]Kendo16 580 points581 points582 points  (18 children)
Oh. So just because he just found out he has a kid he's black. Racist/s
[–]The_Living_Daylights 148 points149 points150 points  (12 children)
Proceeds to buy a Goodyear tire.
[–]Shirt_Face 3500 points3501 points3502 points  (278 children)
Powerball Numbers
1/9/2016
16 19 32 34 57 13
Now workout and eat healthy so we don't end up too fat to enjoy it, dickhead.
[–]vlatheimpaler 34 points35 points36 points  (4 children)
I wouldn't trust my 18 year old self to keep those numbers for so long. They'd just be laying around and end up in the trash whenever I was cleaning next.
[–]b4gelbites_ 22 points23 points24 points  (1 child)
You could tattoo them on you with the date, Memento style.
[–]laserbong 712 points713 points714 points  (246 children)
If you're over 35 now, changing your course of actions as far back as when you were 18 would almost certainly butterfly effect those numbers into different positions at the time of the drawing.
[–]whatamwhy 492 points493 points494 points  (163 children)
I don't think it would. This isn't even him going back in time, it's him talking to his younger self somehow. Unless I'm missing something?
[–]MoroccoBotix 262 points263 points264 points  (53 children)
The act of interacting with the past will change the past and the future.
[–]effa94 11 points12 points13 points  (1 child)
Depends on the nature of time. Is it static like interstellar, or one dynamic one like back to the future or multiverse like terminator 2 and 3? Or is it the "fuck you, fuck your logic and fuck the rules" kind that is drwho?
basicly, 1: You cant change the future, or 2: you can change the future but you gotta be careful so you dont create a paradox, or 3: you can do what you want since a new timeline is just created, or 4, you can maybe do stuff if the plot allows it.
[–]JeepBike 1113 points1114 points1115 points  (126 children)
Keep up the good work son, and uh, don't sell that 80k of AAPL you buy in 2003.
[–]likeabosstroll 529 points530 points531 points  (21 children)
Oh shit. I'm sorry dude. I'm sorry for your 40 million dollar lost.
[–]Satsumomo 194 points195 points196 points  (0 children)
Fuck.
[–]KoNy_BoLoGnA 162 points163 points164 points  (56 children)
You were able to buy $80K of stock when you were 22? Holy shit what is your job?
[–]fifyi 2556 points2557 points2558 points  (150 children)
Tell your dad you love him. He won't be around for much longer.
[–]AdClemson 358 points359 points360 points  (16 children)
Same goes for your mom and your brothers/sisters or whoever you love but don't say it. I lost my young brother last year and I regret not telling him that I loved him.
[–]Anastik 1132 points1133 points1134 points  (54 children)
There are three reasons I will wake up before the sun rises: there’s a fire in the house, I have to work, or I’m going fishing. I like the last reason the best.
So it was with great anticipation that I awoke in the wee hours of the morning on Wednesday last April to go fishing with my dad in the San Francisco Bay.
But this almost didn’t happen. Our relationship had broken down and was in need of repairs, like a vacant home in a once-vibrant neighborhood.
Instead of visiting in person, we now only spoke on the phone, where Dad often dominated the conversation.
And to exacerbate things, instead of visiting with his family in the United States, he now took long vacations to see his distant family in Thailand.
I wasn’t sure I wanted to see him before I left for India, my assignment for my job. Why put myself out there if he’s not willing to do the same?
But after much consternation, I called and told him what had been bothering me. He apologized for neglecting our relationship. I apologized, too. I could have been honest with him earlier, but instead I ignored the issue and didn’t return his phone calls for a time. And you can’t be upset with someone if you aren’t going to tell them why.
We agreed to put this behind us and move on. We kept talking and decided to take a fishing trip to the Bay Area. What talking won’t cure, fishing will.
There were 11 people on the boat when we arrived that morning, the other clientele comprised of fathers and their adolescent sons.
Twenty years ago, the first time we went fishing, Dad and I were the youngest on board. Now we were the oldest.
The boat launched as the sun was rising, the skipper navigating to the middle of the bay.
The scenery was magnificent, the skyscrapers of San Francisco flanking our left and the pillars of the Golden Gate on our right. We made it to the fishing grounds and dropped our lines in the water. The morning passed by quietly, neither of us hooking a fish. Then around noon, I tipped my hat over my eyes and took a siesta.
Five minutes later, Dad yelled he had a fish on the line. After a short struggle, he reeled in an 8-pound striped bass.
I realized combat and fishing are similar in that both are filled with long periods of boredom and rapid bursts of exhilaration.
The rest of the day picked up nicely, but Dad won bragging rights in the end. He caught five fish; I caught three, but more importantly we’d spent time together. Sometimes I think that’s enough.
I’m happy to say I swallowed my pride and reached out to my dad. It sure was nice fishing with him again.
[–]IceFire909 406 points407 points408 points  (15 children)
Holy fuck I thought this was gonna take a downward spiral
[–]InZaintJohn 80 points81 points82 points  (1 child)
Why put myself out there if he’s not willing to do the same?
and he died... oh, he didn't?
We agreed to put this behind us and move on. We kept talking and decided to take a fishing trip to the Bay Area.
But before he could make the trip he... didn't die?
The rest of the day picked up nicely, but Dad won bragging rights in the end. He caught five fish; I caught three, but more importantly we’d spent time together. Sometimes I think that’s enough.
Uhm, ok... that's really nice actually.
[–]20150506 99 points100 points101 points  (0 children)
Upvote for heartwarming. :)
[–]isrly_eder 23 points24 points25 points  (1 child)
I was convinced that the dad was gonna die at some point in this story
[–]ManicMURRAY 111 points112 points113 points  (18 children)
23 and dad just past away, your post hits home hard.
[–]Suchahandsomeperson 45 points46 points47 points  (10 children)
I'm also 23 and my dad died on New Year's eve just gone. It sucks. :(
[–]Dirty_D93 36 points37 points38 points  (4 children)
To say "it sucks" is pretty much the understatement of a lifetime. I lost my mom to her cancer coming back fast and brutal last July. My mom was THE best thing that ever has and ever will happen to me. I miss her so frikn much. Keep your parents close, people.
Edit: I always feel like I could just go on and on about my mother. Thanks for eveything, mom. You deserved more than the world. Now you make it spin. RIP. Heres a pic
[–]Beramer 22 points23 points24 points  (5 children)
I'm glad you had a good father, someone who you loved. If my dad passed away today I wouldn't care.
[–]TheRoseOfSolidarity 9 points10 points11 points  (0 children)
I feel for you! I know how it feels to lose someone close to you.
Try to remember the good parts, because that's what creates your memory of him.
[–]Lovefoolthrowaway 1751 points1752 points1753 points  (256 children)
Dudes who spend their days in strip clubs do NOT make good husbands. :/ EOM.
[–]InVultusSolis 604 points605 points606 points  (69 children)
How did you rationalize that he would?
[–]timesuck897 1890 points1891 points1892 points  (61 children)
He's a good provider, pays attention to women, gives to Charity, helps students with tuition, and likes dancing. Member of a gentleman's club.
[–]Ferelar 1710 points1711 points1712 points  (32 children)
He also has complete control of the weather. Curiously he only chooses to make it rain.
[–]Quixilver05 133 points134 points135 points  (20 children)
I like making it hail
[–]rex1030 11 points12 points13 points  (0 children)
Have some nickles, bitches!
[–]kjdflkas 71 points72 points73 points  (2 children)
Charity is the stripper's name, correct? Nicely done
[–]meghanerd 357 points358 points359 points  (105 children)
I danced for three shifts before I decided that I hated it. Almost all of the guys I talked to felt the need to emphasize to me that they were actually good husbands, fathers, and men.
They weren't.
Edit: I've said this in a few comments but I'll just put it here to avoid confusion. I don't find anything inherently wrong with going to strip clubs. But if you're a married man with kids whose wife doesn't know where you are, defending yourself to me when I never questioned you, it sounds like you're not even convinced you're a good guy. And that is because you aren't.
[–]Pedro95 105 points106 points107 points  (2 children)
If you have to tell someone you're a good man in a bad situation that you and only you put yourself in, you probably aren't a good man.
[–]tentoothpicks 327 points328 points329 points  (13 children)
"Because other people expect me to" is a very poor reason to do anything.
[–]Rivuzu 738 points739 points740 points  (61 children)
Don't leave her for something new. Appreciate what you've got.
Because boy, let me tell you, that something new is a complete fucking mess and 100% going to break your heart and leave you.
Edit: Thanks for the advice guys. Just so you know, I did move on and am completely happy with my new SO now. This was about 12 years ago remember!
[–]Shogun01 187 points188 points189 points  (43 children)
Im 26 and in the midst of this right now. I really wish I could go back to not knowing her. She has completely ruined me and knows it...and doesn't care.
[–]Rivuzu 218 points219 points220 points  (32 children)
Yup. I left my then girlfriend, whom I'd been with for years, for the "love of my life" who I thought I'd known for years and years of being friends (she had to move away, when she moved back we just got lost in each other).
Broke up with my then partner not even caring really, and I did it pretty badly to be honest. Just wrong of me. What's even worse is, looking back, I was so much more at ease with her and enjoyed my life much more with her in it. She was the best thing that happened to me, and I threw away the relationship like a used condom.
Turns out the person I left her to be with was a compulsive cheat, and not even six months later I caught her with someone else. Ended it there and then, but my ex - who I don't expect to have welcomed me back with open arms anyway - had already moved on.
Fun times, yo. Fun times.
[–]somastars 30 points31 points32 points  (11 children)
I went through something kind of similar, but on the flip side of the gender divide. I wasn't ecstatic about the relationship I was in, but it was comfortable. Left it and tried dating someone I'd been friends with for years, who I thought I knew really well. Dude turned out to be a major asshole and I suspect a cheater/player, too.
In the long run, it worked out for the best. I'm with someone now who makes me happier than any of them did. I hope the same result comes (or came) to you.
[–]ABurpThatHurts 30 points31 points32 points  (9 children)
Let the guy of my dreams walk away because I wasn't ready for commitment. He was smart, quiet, incredibly intelligent, respectable, I found him so incredibly attractive (though other girls haven't really agreed with me here), an all around amazing person, we had the same values and he loved LOTR. When I first met him I had never been so viscerally attracted to someone in my life. At the time I just wasn't thinking and just wanted to have fun. He went to grad school, I've tried dating since then but no one comes close. I still think about him all the time, and it's been over 3 years.
[–]Shogun01 17 points18 points19 points  (4 children)
Thats pretty much exactly what im going through. Left my girlfriend of five years to be with my now ex-fiance. We both worked together in the same department and fell for each other right away. I left a very stable relationship to be with who I thought was the "love of my life".
Two months into the relationship and she was already talking about "soulmates" and "best thing that ever happened to each other" and wanting to marry me. I fell for it, and a year later I proposed. She said yes, then three weeks later, tells me in mid argument that she doesnt want to marry me anymore. Tells me that she loves me, but not in the same way that I love her and hasn't been in love with me for a couple of months...
I wouldn't attempt to go back to my girlfriend before my ex-fiance because of the damage I know I caused her. It really feels like karma is coming back around for leaving her the way I did. The way my ex-fiance left me is almost exactly how I left my previous relationship.
So, now I'm living completely alone, with a three thousand dollar ring as a constant reminder of what I thought was going to be. Im not sure, but I have a feeling that my ex-fiance has already moved onto someone else, even though she said she doesn't want to be with anyone else for a long time.
Cue the depression and emptiness.
[–]techniforus 1097 points1098 points1099 points  (40 children)
Be there for your sister. She will need you. Of all the regrets in my life, her death was by far the most painful.
Do not take those in your life for granted. They are what truly matter above all else.
[–]WildTurkey81 76 points77 points78 points  (14 children)
I worry about my brother. He's a hermit and I think he'll live with my Dad from here on out, I dont see him getting a job. He can barely go into town without risking a panic attack, and therapy isnt something he'll do. And Im planning on going away to university this year. I want to stay close enough to home so that I can easily visit my friends and family. Im so scared that one day he might not be there. Its something that Ive accepted and am less afraid of these days because he has adapted to the lifestyle and seems healthier than he used to be, in all ways. But I dont ever want to regret not being there. This conment choked me for a sec lol and if it's any consolation, I'll take your life experience and make sure I am there.
[–]urbanpixie2 55 points56 points57 points  (3 children)
No no no. Your brother knows you love him. Go to college and live your life. As the sibling who's struggled in life and stayed close to home, it makes me happy to see my brother living away from us and enjoying a happy and fulfilling life. I understand that I don't have the skills to be part of his world, and I would have felt worse if he stayed close to home just to protect me.
[–]Something_Personal 113 points114 points115 points  (0 children)
I'm sorry for your loss. Thanks for sharing
[–]njpete 907 points908 points909 points  (196 children)
STAY IN COLLEGE!
[–]notahipster- 242 points243 points244 points  (138 children)
I dropped out and have kind of been going back. But honestly I'm screaming this at myself right now because I want to leave again pretty badly. I'm almost 22.
Edit: Most of you are being really supportive, so thank you. I never really get that from anyone so it's pretty helpful. If my reponce seems short and generic, it's because I'm still half asleep, but what you are all saying really means a lot. I'll try my best to get my shit together.
[–]tacknosaddle 134 points135 points136 points  (30 children)
I dropped out but finally pushed through an undergrad as an adult and even a master's when I had a family. I regret that I didn't finish sooner but on the other hand I also feel like I got more out of school when I was going because I wanted to and not because I was supposed to (YMMV). If you can gut it out and push through I would say do it but if you stop, keep taking at least one class at a time (even if unrelated to your degree but for shits and giggles) because I can tell you that getting your ass back into a classroom after a long absence is much harder than actually taking the class.
[–]Warrlock608 47 points48 points49 points  (20 children)
This is where I am at right now, when I was younger I went to school because everyone told me it is what I'm supposed to do. Now I go to school because I sincerely want to go to class and learn. I'm taking a lot more away from it than I would've and I'm getting exceptional grades because I'm actually putting in the effort.
[–]AnimalPowers 72 points73 points74 points  (16 children)
I dropped out of community colleges twice.
Ultimately, I had enrolled in those alone.
The third time I went to a trade-school like college and made a really good friend. The days I was ready to walk in and quit, or didn't get out of bed, he would drag me in and make me do the work.
The days he wanted to quit I would drag him in and make him do the work.
We held each other accountable and together, we got through it. Completing it was such an accomplishment, for myself. Finally, able to commit on something for two years. To make it through.
During that time, I had seen lots of people drop out. I had seen people who would drop to go do some work and make some cash and come back to "finish later" but never come back, with half the work done and no degree, all the debt and when they come back they start over because everything expired.
Towards the end, I saw a few students who were like me in the beginning. Sitting in the labs not doing the work, or skipping out of class as soon as possible. I saw these lazy young kids, who embodied something I was just a year or two prior and thought to myself "I can't believe I was ever that guy, I'm proud of where I've come".
It helps that a lot of these people were 35+, 40+ enrolling to learn a new skill and get a better job, often on top of two jobs. It helps to see those people who inspire you and remember there is a greater purpose and you can learn some of their urgency. That you don't want to do this 20 years from now, get it out of the way now and do it right the first time.
Honestly though, without that friend, I don't think I would've made it. Now we stay competitive in the job market and keep each other on our toes, while still being able to rely on each other as a resource.
Do whatever you have to do to get into class. Make sure you're there. Make sure you do the work, whatever it takes. Don't drop out. If you can, pay attention.
[–]riconquer 50 points51 points52 points  (19 children)
Honestly, 22 isn't bad. I fucked around a bit, and didn't graduate until 24, and it really hasn't killed me. In fact, I think I did better last year because I was a little older.
Just make sure you can explain the gap in your education. "I didn't know what I wanted to study, so I slowed down a bit in order to save some money and figure things out before getting my degree." Works pretty well in an interview if the topic comes up.
[–]Turfie146 82 points83 points84 points  (18 children)
Conversely, I should have bailed out.
I did very well, obtained scholarships but deep down, I was only fooling myself. I was trying to fulfill my parents dreams of me working in the health care field. Turns out, that's no place for me.
I then spent 9-10 years trying to make some use of my degree out of guilt/stubborness/frustration.
Had I just bailed out and gotten a trade related to construction or equipment operation, I'd be far happier now.
[–]inardtickler 406 points407 points408 points  (33 children)
QUIT SMOKING CIGARETTES!!!!!
[–]kurodoku 77 points78 points79 points  (19 children)
dont start smoking
FTFY
[–]GoggleField 18 points19 points20 points  (5 children)
Most people who are truly addicted to smoking start before 18.
[–]gronkspike25 451 points452 points453 points  (63 children)
She is cheating on you and the kid isn't yours. Would have saved me a lot of pain if I knew what my ex wife was capable of.
Edit: Since some of you have asked, here's the story.
I work a job where I am gone half the year. While I was gone she cheated on me with the father of the kid. The kid was born and I thought we were a happy family. For two years I thought we were this happy family. Beautiful wife and great little girl. Then I came home from work early. Didn't catch them in the act or anything but apparently this fucking asshole thought I was still at work and texted my ex-wife to ask when her parents were taking the kid so he could come over. I saw it and flipped the fuck out. I was devastated. I worked my ass off so she didn't have to work or do anything. All she had to do was raise what I thought was our kid. We fought for that whole month I was home. When I went back to work she moved out and I decided to file for divorce. It was quick and easy because I had a prenup but it fucked me up for a long time.
I haven't seen the kid since. She is now married to the fucking asshole that she was fucking behind my back and I suppose they raise the girl as if I never existed hoping she doesn't remember. I didn't fight for any sort of custody or anything because I just couldn't fucking believe it.
[–]mushperv 56 points57 points58 points  (9 children)
Goddammit man. I'm irate just reading that. Hang in there.
[–]gronkspike25 75 points76 points77 points  (8 children)
I'm good now. This was awhile ago. Lucking a year and a half after I met an amazing woman who I am happily married to.
[–]ThatGuyFromOhio 550 points551 points552 points  (108 children)
Don't marry her!
[–]AgingLolita 337 points338 points339 points  (10 children)
Move out. The problem is not you. Don't leave it until the only way out is an abusive man who moves you in with him. Save up, put down a deposit or get a shared room, it doesn't matter. You are not the idiot they claim that you are, and you will cope fine as long as you stay on the meds.
[–]uswhole 840 points841 points842 points  (29 children)
YESTERDAY YOU SAID TOMORROW...
[–]juskajo 1808 points1809 points1810 points  (102 children)
  • Networking, connections, schmoozing, social skills, etc. do more to determine your place in the world more than any hard work or talent (not that you're remotely hard working or talented, but still). Here’s a crazy thought, try being USEFUL to other people, rather than cool & cocky, and see where that gets you.
  • If you were too good for that job, you wouldn’t be working there in the first place. You would already have something better. Same goes for your friends, your school, everything else about your life you feel is sub-par or inadequate. The universe is not going to just see you pouting and correct whatever mistake you think it’s made.
  • Your taste in art/music/movies/games/literature/politics does not make you any more interesting than the next asshole. No, it doesn’t. Those things are for your own private entertainment, they're not fashion accessories. Christ. As if you’re the first 21yo white guy to get into Radiohead or Tom Waits. Oh, you think reality shows are for idiots? Well then, let's get you in MENSA right away! Wait, what was last fall’s GPA again? Yeah, that’s what I thought. Get over yourself.
  • Grow some judgment, don’t stick it in crazy, just stay the fuck away from her, any moron with six brain cells could see that she's fucking whack-a-doo, use your head you godawful insufferable oblivious self-involved asshole I mean jesus fucking christ almighty.
Okay.
I feel better...
Sort of....
[–]jbaird 37 points38 points39 points  (2 children)
This is the best thing in this thread:
Your taste in art/music/movies/games/literature/politics does not make you any more interesting than the next asshole. No, it doesn’t. Those things are for your own private entertainment, they're not fashion accessories. Christ. As if you’re the first 21yo white guy to get into Radiohead or Tom Waits. Oh, you think reality shows are for idiots? Well then, let's get you in MENSA right away! Wait, what was last fall’s GPA again? Yeah, that’s what I thought. Get over yourself.
[–]KingOfBongoz 116 points117 points118 points  (3 children)
Your comment was nice, at least for me
[–]FletcherMiller 159 points160 points161 points  (11 children)
I enjoy the rage/embarrassment in your post, but there shouldn't be too much shame in being a self-absorbed, narcissistic 18 year-old who thinks he knows everything. You are not the only one. Not by a long shot.
[–]bscottprice 539 points540 points541 points  (25 children)
On 9 June 2006, that won't be a rock in the road. It is a 155mm artillery shell waiting for you and your crew to run over it. When you run over it, the inside of your truck will turn into the pit of hell. In fact, do not pass the EOD sweep team, stay behind them. Yeah, they're doing 2mph, but they won't miss the IED. They will see it, and disarm it before it can eviscerate your truck.
[–]Iscabibble 103 points104 points105 points  (5 children)
That dude is abusive as fuck. Run little Iscabibble, run!
[–]Bucket_O_Beef 547 points548 points549 points  (76 children)
Invest in Google and Apple.
[–]hwarang_ 378 points379 points380 points  (12 children)
Invest in Gugalendapel, got it! Sounds European.
[–]SenTedStevens 123 points124 points125 points  (40 children)
For me, it was Tesla. I had the chance to buy in at around $30/share. I could have been so rich.
[–]Spytap 101 points102 points103 points  (29 children)
I bought Apple at 18/share (two or three splits ago) and Tesla at 32, but I still kick myself for not throwing a couple grand into Bitcoin when I first considered it - back in mid 2009.
You always remember the big misses, even with a couple hits under your belt.
[–]-AstralSlide- 60 points61 points62 points  (2 children)
Girls dig confidence. Just be your fucking self and proud of it. Approach them. Talk. Laugh. Don't keep standing sheepishly at a bar hoping they'll flock to your cool ass. They won't.
[–]TossTheDog 129 points130 points131 points  (28 children)
Read up on alcoholism, the genetics of it and how your mom was... all of it. Its gonna be an important 'thing' in your life in about 20 years. Check it out and make some better decisions now rather than later.
[–]AskMeSomeOtherTime 149 points150 points151 points  (23 children)
Don't slice your arms up! You will, in fact, want to wear sleeveless shirts some day.
[–]JamealTheSeal 10 points11 points12 points  (1 child)
Many people I care about have these scars. I don't judge, I'm glad for you that your life is going better
[–]pyth1100 89 points90 points91 points  (10 children)
For what it's worth, I personally don't judge people who have these scars. You cope with shit however you cope.
[–]EndlessIntermission 105 points106 points107 points  (54 children)
Major in a subject that you actually give a fuck about. This IT career is the pits.
[–]bcra00 56 points57 points58 points  (9 children)
Exercise! Start now. It takes literally an hour a day. Look at it as hygiene like taking a shower or brushing your teeth.
[–]Slapo2 125 points126 points127 points  (13 children)
You should REALLY go for that girl
[–]tCaFoaG 17 points18 points19 points  (4 children)
I don't think I'll ever be in such a situation.
[–]animado 54 points55 points56 points  (2 children)
Invest some of that drinking money.
[–]-eDgAR- 176 points177 points178 points  (25 children)
Learn to better manage your money and start saving now.
[–]I_SPLIT_INFINITIVES 292 points293 points294 points  (8 children)
You at 18-22
Haha no fuck you
[–]ohlookahipster 23 points24 points25 points  (12 children)
Honest question. I see you all the time in askreddit at the top of the threads. How do you do it? Is there some secret formula you have or is it just a numbers game?
edit: stop giving me financial advice silly beans
[–]beingthatguy 18 points19 points20 points  (6 children)
Somehow either everyone else seems to have misinterpreted your question, or I have. Anyways, I imagine he browses /r/new and responds to a large number of the posts he thinks have potential to be seen. The earlier you get in on stuff like that, the better shot you have, even though a good number of your posts will still get overlooked.
[–]drizzl 155 points156 points157 points  (9 children)
Don't go to that small, expensive college. Go to a big, cheaper one. You'll have a better time, get the same education, and won't be in debt the rest of your life.
[–]Buck_Thunderpumper 73 points74 points75 points  (9 children)
Restaurant work is for the birds. It will kill your social life, family life, and destroy your body. Find a job that doesn't involve so much sacrifice for such shit wages. Also, don't fuck Michelle.
[–]gustogus 49 points50 points51 points  (4 children)
Go To Class.
[–]breakerfall 22 points23 points24 points  (3 children)
I ctrl-F'd so as not to duplicate, but I was thinking something more along the lines of:
GO TO CLASS, ASSHOLE!
[–]raiast 125 points126 points127 points  (17 children)
Opening your legs for them won't make them like you or, more importantly, respect you.
Edit: Whoops, just actually read the title. I'm a tad younger than 35. Still though.
[–]zomgitsduke 105 points106 points107 points  (25 children)
I'm 27 but I'd love to yell at myself to save 25% of my income and invest in stocks. Even $500 a year would have gone miles by today.
The most important thing would have been getting the learning stage out of the way before I had all this extra money in my life. I would've probably lost less money my first year investing.
[–]rkschmidt11 5 points6 points7 points  (0 children)
Seconded. You learn each mistake one time.
'Oh, maybe i shouldn't buy $50 worth of AMD and somehow expect to cover the transaction fees'
'Oh, maybe I shouldn't sell at market price without setting a minimum just because the ticker said it was up when I clicked sell'
'Oh, maybe penny stocks really are shit'
Luckily I'm just 25, and my lessons only cost me like $300 (and a potential $700 because of the 2nd one). but If you're in you're early 20s drop a grand in an account and play around and learn your lessons early, and you just might one day cover inflation like the master himself (me).
[–]greenmask 2 points3 points4 points  (6 children)
Gotta invest in right ones though. Who knows, maybe you'd have pissed away your savings by investing in some shitty company.
[–]zomgitsduke 1 point2 points3 points  (4 children)
I would have done safe investments hopefully.
[–]greenmask 7 points8 points9 points  (1 child)
You could also invest in Index funds if you have the money! They're pretty safe!
[–]iamgaben 1 point2 points3 points  (0 children)
Index funds for safe long periods of saving. Retirement for example. Stocks are for playing around imo. Dont invest more than you can afford to lose, one day it could all be worth nothing.
[–]greenmask 0 points1 point2 points  (1 child)
See you say to yourself you'd invest in Netflix and Apple but you'd have never known. There is probably a company waiting to blow up like Netflix so it's not too late yet!
[–]edinburg 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
I'm only 24 and I wish I could have given similar advice to myself when I was starting college. I correctly figured that my income would massively increase after I graduated but failed to realize that my expenses would increase from almost nothing to consuming most of my paycheck.
I pissed away thousands of dollars on the stupidest stuff in college assuming I'd just have even more money to play with after graduation. Now I'm slowly building savings and investments with what I have leftover at the end of each month and kicking myself for not realizing just how much money I was earning back then and taking better care of it.
[–]Drudicta [score hidden]  (0 children)
You made enough money that you could save 25% of your income?
[–]wilsky25 [score hidden]  (0 children)
I don't really do new years resolutions but I have money in a savings account and have been telling myself to visit /r/personalfinance and learn about investing. Do you or anyone else have a place where I can start. I'm not sure if I necessarily want to do stocks I just want a safe investment that will earn more than the savings account it is in now which is ~1%. I have between 10-15k to invest and am college aged
[–]SegwayDriveby 0 points1 point2 points  (6 children)
As an opinion from someone who seems like they've found some success. I want to start the learning stage. How/where do I go about it?
[–]xSnuggleBear 7 points8 points9 points  (2 children)
Check out investopedia.com, they have a stock market simulator where they give you fake money, and it's tied to the real markets, it's pretty fun. (Also shows you how easy it is to make money if you have capital.) They have a ton of great tutorials from super beginner stuff, to really advanced concepts (and believe me, there are a ton of them.)
If you want to throw some real money at it, get on RobinHood! I don't think there is a desktop version, it's solely a mobile app, but the trades are 0 commission, which is a huge deal. I started on ING before they got bought out by Capital One, and I think the trades were 8$ a piece, well, I was just putting like $50 a week away, so by the time I'd buy a stock and then sell it again to cash out, I had already lost $16! So I wasn't even able to cover the commission.
RobinHood is badass, the App itself is beautiful and works well, and the company is backed and vetted. The $0 commission is great, it's fun to play around with your money and not have to lose it all on trades. Sitting in Starbucks and come up with a good idea? Sell your Dunkin Donuts stock and buy Starbucks right there, pretty cool.
The main thing with me for stocks was mostly just that I wanted to learn, but also, bank transfers out of the app take about 3 days, so this way I could put money away and not just transfer it out like an idiot when I saw some stupid thing I thought I wanted to buy, this would force me to wait three days, and by then I had always completely forgotten about it. Savings accounts don't really work for me, too easy to just transfer to checking and blow it away.
Sorry this is written like a commercial for Robinhood, I don't work for them, they wouldn't let me, trust me.
EDIT: Also, after a year, I was up 19%, I think I made like $400 in the end, just tucking away $50 at a time. Don't use this as your primary savings obviously, as stocks are a risk. They won't make you rich unless you have a good amount of money to invest (On investopedia I started with 250k of fake money, two months into this round I'm up 75k. Imagine making 75k in two months and not even working... You just need 250k to start with.)
EDIT2: When I got on RobinHood it was an invite only thing, I'm not sure if it still is, but if it is I can send you an invite.
[–]killevery1ne 0 points1 point2 points  (1 child)
Uni student here, super interested so thanks for the info. Been wanting to get into stocks. Are you able to use it if you're not located in the US? UK here.
[–]xSnuggleBear [score hidden]  (0 children)
From their site:
To apply for a Robinhood account, you must:
be 18 years or older (custodial accounts are coming soon) have a valid Social Security Number (not a Taxpayer Identification Number) have a legal U.S. residential address be a U.S. citizen or U.S. permanent resident or have a valid U.S. visa*
So, looks like no. I don't know anything about the euro stock market. Maybe google "commission free UK stock trading" or something similar, or "robinhood alternatives"
[–]pacefire 1 point2 points3 points  (0 children)
Go check out /r/personalfinance The tl:dr is basically figure out your expenses, get your budget together, and invest as much as you can into low cost index funds via your tax advantages accounts (IRA or 401k, etc.)
[–]zomgitsduke 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
Spend a year with $10000 theroetical dollars and have fun. Remember you pay a $10 fee for each trade on average so keep that in mind.
Do research.
Join /r/investing and /r/stocks, but realize they aren't a professional organization nor 100% reliable.
If you want to start investing, look up retirement accounts and their benefits, and invest in super safe stocks.
[–]capitolprostitute 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
Never put more in high risk stocks than you are willing to lose. Think of the number you would be comfortable saying good bye to and stick with it
[–]mikasjoman 0 points1 point2 points  (1 child)
Me and my wife saves about 50% of our salaries now. It can be done, it takes dicipline though. Marrying a chinese woman helps allot with dicipline :)
[–]aydiosmio [score hidden]  (0 children)
Helps to be a dual income household.
[–]TractorOfTheDoom 439 points440 points441 points  (19 children)
Work the fuck out. Fucking study. And stop fucking swearing all the motherfucking time.
[–]PaulClarkLoadletter 4 points5 points6 points  (0 children)
Holy shit, you're right on. I could run a mile in about 5 fucking minutes back then. Now it takes me 15 minutes to move my lazy ass. Had I just kept up with it, I wouldn't have to work as hard as I am now.
As for the swearing, I can say whatever the fuck I want as long as there's fucking context. If you're just filling in stuttering space with the word "fucking" it's time to read a fucking book and exercise your vernacular so you don't sound like an imbecile. Keep that profanity handy because when the moment calls for it you'll want to summon every fucking vestige of profanity to scare the shit out of somebody that needs a talking to.
[–]PokeZillaX3000 40 points41 points42 points  (5 children)
Hey! Watch your fucking language, ya twat! There might be children here! The fucking nerve of some people...
[+][deleted]  (4 children)
[removed]
    [–]Kylethetrashpile 1 point2 points3 points  (0 children)
    /u/trollabot tractorofthedoom
    [–]Yangoose [score hidden]  (1 child)
    I've explained to my teenage son that there will never be a better, easier time in his life to get in better shape and put on muscle than right now.
    He'd rather play more video games...
    [–]dannighe [score hidden]  (0 children)
    My dad gave me the same advice. I really wish I had listened.
    [–]ZehFrenchman [score hidden]  (0 children)
    Samuel L. Jackson?
    [–]Cishet_Shitlord 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
    Fucking this right here.
    [–]tCaFoaG -1 points0 points1 point  (0 children)
    I am fat pootis
    [–]BadBadBrownStuff -1 points0 points1 point  (0 children)
    Fuck Yeah
    [–]kurodoku -1 points0 points1 point  (0 children)
    Damn it that was a fucking good advice, ya old bastard. Thanks.
    [–]streetsweepskeet -1 points0 points1 point  (0 children)
    Fuck yeah
    [–]scarletmanuka 1259 points1260 points1261 points  (102 children)
    Stop worrying so much about what other people think of you. At the end of the day what they think doesn't matter.
    Also, stop dwelling on the past. Rehashing past mistakes and injustices will do naught but feed your anxieties.
    [–]Meat_Confetti 8 points9 points10 points  (0 children)
    Also, stop dwelling on the past.
    I was positively plagued by this when I was ~22. I'm 38 now and it still happens sometimes, but it's nowhere near as bad it used to be.
    [–]jlhc55 7 points8 points9 points  (0 children)
    Yeah, I used to worry a lot about making people like me. It really doesn't matter. I haven't seen most of those people in years anyway.
    [–]InVultusSolis 664 points665 points666 points  (80 children)
    Stop worrying so much about what other people think of you.
    This is what I call "meaningless trite life advice". It's also found in Hobby Lobby printed on canvas signs with phrases like "shoot for the moon, even if you miss you'll still land among the stars!"
    About 9/10ths of succeeding in life is based upon what other people think of you. Imagine any situation in which you need to ask another person for something, be it trying to get a job, dating, trying to finance a house/car, etc. Guess the fuck what! The other person in any of these transactions judges you extensively. If you show up wearing a bathrobe and a greasy white T-shirt smelling like unwashed balls, talk obnoxiously, tell stupid jokes that only you laugh at, or have any other irritating habits, people are not going to like you. Your reputation and your word are probably the two most valuable things you have. So saying "it doesn't matter what people think of you" is a load of bollocks, because what people think of you is probably the most important metric in your life.
    [–]MuppetusMaximus 483 points484 points485 points  (22 children)
    While you're correct, you're extrapolating.
    The "don't worry what other people think of you" advice is best applied to your self interests. So many of our younger years are spent worrying about impressing our peers. Listening to the same music. Watching the same shows/movies. Wearing the same clothes. Having the same hobbies.
    As you age, you realize those things don't matter. Like what you like. Those who judge you for it are idiots. Of course there's proper busines etiquette and basic hygiene to worry about, but if those things are met, who gives a shit what you or others like to do in their spare time?
    It's an important lesson for children to learn. The opinion of a classmate who makes fun of you for listening to a different band doesn't matter. Do what you like and make yourself happy.
    [–]contom422 66 points67 points68 points  (5 children)
    I agree with you. I wasted so much time and energy in college trying to impress people that I would never see again, and I wasn't being true to myself. I wish I could go back to that time and not worry about it so much and just do me.
    [–]Tktarr 5 points6 points7 points  (0 children)
    You probably "did yourself" more times than you'll care to admit
    [–]InVultusSolis 2 points3 points4 points  (1 child)
    I wish I could go back to that time and not worry about it so much
    Why so much regret? If I sat down and thought about it, I could probably think of some pretty blundery stuff I did in high school, but that's just the thing. Nothing comes to mind because I don't think about it. The past is dead and gone has has very little bearing over right now.
    [–]verotx 20 points21 points22 points  (4 children)
    I think this is meant for college and school-type social interactions. Especially in high school and college, who the fuck cares what people think because in 4 years you'll likely never see them again!
    [–]shatheid 2 points3 points4 points  (0 children)
    It also means to like what you like.
    Don't avoid listening to a band you like, or talking to the quiet weird kid whose actually pretty nice, or avoid taking up music classes because you're worried about what people will think.
    Do what you like, its what makes you...you, and will eventually attract people (friends & love interests) towards you that have the same interests.
    If you're always hiding what you truly enjoy, you can't be surprised when you don't find others who enjoy the same things you do.
    [–]King_of_the_Quill 1 point2 points3 points  (1 child)
    Try the end of the semester lol
    [–]verotx 1 point2 points3 points  (0 children)
    Teachers tend to pass you if they care about their reputation. It reflects negative on a teacher if students fail so they like to jump students 10-15 points to pass.
    I got bumped 25 points to pass math so she got good appraises.
    [–]klousGT 52 points53 points54 points  (3 children)
    If you feel this way, you likely don't have an anxiety disorder.
    [–]rivalarrival 6 points7 points8 points  (1 child)
    shoot for the moon, even if you miss you'll still land among the stars!
    Actually, you're most likely to end up in a highly eccentric earth orbit, only to be perturbed enough by the moon's gravity to end up crashing into the earth, the moon, or flung into a solar orbit. Miss the moon, and you're dead, you just don't know it yet.
    [–]GamerKey [score hidden]  (0 children)
    I see /r/KerbalSpaceProgram is leaking again.
    One of us! One of us!
    [–]Shnakepup 4 points5 points6 points  (1 child)
    I think you missed an important qualifier in there:
    Stop worrying so much about what other people think of you
    The point isn't that you shouldn't worry at all. Obviously there is a modicum of attention you need to pay to other people's thoughts and judgements about you. The problem is when you get overly consumed with it, constantly worrying and having anxiety over what people think.
    [–]InVultusSolis [score hidden]  (0 children)
    The problem is when you get overly consumed with it, constantly worrying and having anxiety over what people think.
    There is definitely some point at which you have to express your individualism and say "I just don't give a fuck anymore, I'm doing things my own way". Believe me, living in a super conformist suburb where every parent is obsessed with sports to what I would consider an unhealthy level, I've found that tipping point long ago. But I know that not being like of those people comes at a cost... I'm never going to be taken seriously in the local community because I'm not a "sports dad", I don't dress like a suburbanite (head to toe in UA gear, in other words), I have tattoos, my ears are pierced, etc. But I've accepted the cost and made peace with it. I don't just expect that those things aren't going to factor in at all with my dealings with others.
    My previous comment doesn't mean that people are required to always consider others' opinions of them first and foremost. It means "Ignore others' thoughts at your peril, don't expect to disregard social conventions without consequence."
    [–]mdSAX 20 points21 points22 points  (5 children)
    Hey what you said isn't false but you really completely missed the point. You should really reconsider how you try to impress and worry about everyone else and instead focus on yourself. Otherwise you are wasting your time becoming something for someone else instead of something for yourself. Which of course is also fine but I think the general consensus is its better to not be a sheep/pleb/follower like you want to be. Of course it is easier to follow than to lead so if you like the easy road then keep on keeping on.
    [–]thepinkservbot 0 points1 point2 points  (2 children)
    Which of course is also fine but I think the general consensus is its better to not be a sheep/pleb/follower like you want to be.
    Really, dude? You sound like a 15-year-old who just read The Catcher in the Rye for the first time.
    [–]mdSAX [score hidden]  (1 child)
    I generally try to reply to people in the tone they present their arguments with, dude. I'm not a fan of any of Salinger's works either, but I do adamantly believe in self-determined individuality. You can keep making jokes about high schoolers if you want though.
    [–]thepinkservbot [score hidden]  (0 children)
    I thought I matched your tone, but perhaps I was not judgmental enough. I'm not really sure how you expect me to respond to someone who apparently feels it's his place to determine that another person's behaviors or tastes is or isn't a result of "self-determined individuality." I'm also not really sure how you can expect to remain unscathed by scorn as you throw words like "sheep" and "pleb" around.
    Most people I meet who "adamantly believe in self-determined individuality" in such a way that manifests in talk of the cow-eyed, unthinking masses typically end up looking back a decade later, shocked at how much money they invested into the "self-determined individuality" that was advertised to them.
    [–]InVultusSolis -1 points0 points1 point  (1 child)
    its better to not be a sheep/pleb/follower like you want to be
    Yeah, I'm not nearly edgy enough to not be a pleb.
    [–]mdSAX 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
    Just trying to use reddit lingo to fit in. You know, to be a pleb :._.:
    [–]Lawlcat 1 point2 points3 points  (0 children)
    because what people think of you is probably the most important metric in your life.
    [anxiety intensifies]
    [–]contentBat 1 point2 points3 points  (1 child)
    About 9/10ths of succeeding in life is based upon what other people think of you.
    People overthink what others think of them. Truth is 99% of people don't give a shit about what they think of others. People are too wrapped up in themselves and what other people think of them.
    [–]InVultusSolis 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
    People overthink what others think of them.
    No, people like to feel superior and/or special. There's quite the difference there.
    [–]asimplescribe 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
    Stop worrying so much does not mean don't be concerned with what others think at all ever.
    [–]BackInOmNomNam 0 points1 point2 points  (1 child)
    The phrase is definitely vague enough that it can be explained your way. That's kind of the point of a motivational phrase, specific enough to have a point, vague enough so it applies to everyone.
    I believe the meaning lies more in your own self-confidence. Say what you think. Act genuinely. Examples like hygiene, or professionalism aren't the point of the phrase, it's more about the state of mind. Overall, own your personality and be confident. People will respect and like you more.
    [–]InVultusSolis 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
    Say what you think.
    Unless you think things that are objectively awful, then you need to keep that shit to yourself.
    Overall, own your personality and be confident.
    What if you're a narcissistic dickwad and no one can stand to be in the room with you for more than five minutes?
    Sorry, there is an objective standard of being a decent human being, and platitudes like "just be yourself" are about as helpful as a can of silly string in a gunfight.
    [–]GamerKey 0 points1 point2 points  (3 children)
    If you show up wearing a bathrobe and a greasy white T-shirt smelling like unwashed balls, talk obnoxiously, tell stupid jokes that only you laugh at, or have any other irritating habits, people are not going to like you
    This is what I call a Strawman Argument.
    Nobody honestly means "stop caring completely about anything" when they say
    Stop worrying so much about what other people think of you.
    There is a time and place to consider what people think of you, and basic ettiquette and cleanliness go without saying. But many people worry about absolutely mundane interactions like
    "oh my god what will that cashier think of me when I only put X articles on the band"
    and similar things. Some people even go out of their way to uphold a certain appearance when it is entirely unneccessary, such as buying something else that they don't actually need to make their purchase seem more "normal" in the aforementioned example.
    People worry so much that there might be someone, somewhere, who might end up not liking them or thinking less of them that it leads to anxiety. That is what people mean you shouldn't do when they say "stop caring so much".
    [–]InVultusSolis 0 points1 point2 points  (2 children)
    This is what I call a Strawman Argument.
    Yes, as much of a surprise as it may be, I too took English 102: Rhetoric.
    People worry so much that there might be someone, somewhere, who might end up not liking them or thinking less of them that it leads to anxiety.
    I guess I simply don't understand. I don't feel anxiety, but I carry myself knowing actions have consequences. I don't bend over backwards for people, but I'm also not needlessly brash and do offer a helping hand when needed. Shit like that (what people think of the person I am) seems to just work itself out for me.
    [–]GamerKey 0 points1 point2 points  (1 child)
    Shit like that (what people think of the person I am) seems to just work itself out for me.
    I'm the same way and 7 years ago I would probably have responded like you did.
    But after getting a long, hard look into the world of people who suffer from depression and anxiety, which surprisingly lead to other people I considered to be like me confiding their worries in me because they felt I should understand them it's hard to not want to correct someone who bluntly takes a simple statement like this at pure face value and with the most literal interpretation imaginable.
    [–]InVultusSolis [score hidden]  (0 children)
    someone who bluntly takes a simple statement like this at pure face value and with the most literal interpretation imaginable.
    It's not like I don't understand what you're saying and/or trying to do, but I still contend that this advice, just at face value, is essentially meaningless and trite without a lot of clarification and qualifiers.
    [–]Mashflob 0 points1 point2 points  (1 child)
    It depends on how you measure a life. I mean you're pretty right but there is a balance. No one is saying don't wash your balls when they say this. What the spirit of the adage is is to spend energy working on you and being the person you like. Don't chase other people's happiness -- find your own. That's my belief at least.
    [–]InVultusSolis 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
    Absolutely, but you must admit that without a series of qualifiers, that advice is essentially meaningless and open-ended.
    What if my happiness is living in a van down by the river? Objectively speaking, if I can still dress and groom myself and present myself in a respectable manner, it shouldn't matter one bit that I choose to live in a van down by the river. But as soon as I go to apply for anything (job, bank account, loan) I'm either going to have to put homeless or a PO box as an address. No respectable institution accepts a PO box as an address, or if they entertain the idea, they're going to inquire as to why I have a PO box, and I'll have to tell them I live in a van down by the river (which presumes homelessness and financial irresponsibility). So what is the cost of my happiness in this case? I'd better either be independently wealthy or plan on being very poor.
    I grant you, this is an extreme example, but it does illustrate an important point: your happiness and how much you're willing to disregard convention and social norms comes at a cost.
    [–]RockAShadow 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
    This is what I call "meaningless trite life advice".
    Yet you seem to have taken it. I'm thinking you're kinda of dick right now.
    [–]Dougiethefresh2333 0 points1 point2 points  (1 child)
    I think you're absolutely missing the point. If you worry about what others think of you they won't like you just because of that. Like yourself and other people most likely will too.
    If I'm giving out a loan am I gonna give it to the nervous guy who wants to please me or the confident guy who believes in himself regardless of if I do or not?
    [–]InVultusSolis [score hidden]  (0 children)
    If I'm giving out a loan am I gonna give it to the nervous guy who wants to please me or the confident guy who believes in himself regardless of if I do or not?
    I don't know, are you a banker who underwrites loans? That seems to be a pretty relevant question when making a statement like that.
    [–]irrumatrix 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
    Missing the point entirely. Worrying too much about what other people think of you is THE VERY THING that negatively impacts how you behave around other people.
    If you weren't so worried, that interview would go much smoother. If you weren't so anxious, that date would be easy. If you weren't so nervous, you could deliver that joke better. If you didn't care about what other people thought of you, you'd go follow your dreams and become an artist or horse rider or whatever it is you'd really like to do. And so on.
    When people express their admiration for a IDGAF attitude, they're not talking about poor hygiene and shitty conversation. Those are signs of depression and antisocial behaviour and who the fuck wants that? They're talking about people who manage to enter into things without letting fear of the outcome impact the moment when the outcome is decided. They're talking about people who are true to their own desires and convictions, not living their lives dependent on the approval of others.
    [–]grass_cutter 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
    because what people think of you is probably the most important metric in your life.
    I wouldn't go that far. I think you're taking life too seriously.
    First of all with girls, the bathrobe and unwashed balls idea is probably a lot more effective than what most dudes do. It shows confidence (and unwashed balls).
    I think the statement is not to be taken as a dichotomy but a scale.
    Take the scale of "giving a fuck about others' opinions"
    I really really care < ----------------------- > I have severe autism and am a sociopath
    We're not saying go all the way to the right. We're saying "relax it a bit" ... most people do not give a single solitary fuck about the shit you are thinking or doing or even wearing. As individuals we attach way more importance on how we are externally viewed that necessary. But yeah personal hygiene may be a minor exception to the rule.
    [–]issybo415 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
    Yeah, but all of life is an individualized representation of reality. you can't read minds, and you can't change thoughts, so the only person who can actually make you feel the way you feel is you. The only person in your life that is real and tangible is you. Everything else is probably just a figment of your imagination. Because life is completely pointless.
    But to gratify your point, in the words of Rupaul, "Unless they payin' your bills, pay them bitches no mind"
    [–]gelfin 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
    The only thing wrong with "don't worry what others think of you" is that it's too vaguely stated for people, you included, to have any idea what it means or how to apply it in their lives. It's actually the most important bit of advice you'll ever get, but you won't recognize it until you've got it, and then you'll have trouble explaining it to those who haven't.
    I'm going to try anyway: the point of your life is not to impress other people or to make them happy. You don't shower or dress decently or otherwise behave like a civilized adult because you're afraid of how other people will react if you don't. You do those things because you have some goddamned self-respect. Lots of important decisions become a lot clearer once you stop letting yourself be driven by fear of other people's appraisal of you. You might make the rational choice that if you want a particular kind of job, you need to turn up for the interview in clothes appropriate for the occasion, but that's different from treating the interview as an exercise in validating you as a human being, even if you turn up in the same suit either way.
    If you're doing the latter, then you need the interviewer's approval so much that you're prone to making bad choices. Say he tells you that you need to stock up your wardrobe so you can wear a suit like that every day and also that he'll need you to work weekends. If you're chasing approval, you say "yes" and end up fucking miserable and probably not even understanding why. As far as you're concerned you've been doing "all the right things" and yet you hate your life. Probably you think there's something wrong with you. Really the only thing wrong is that your definition of "doing the right things" is adopting someone else's priorities to the exclusion of even forming any of your own, and taking other people's happiness with you as an objective metric of success. On the other hand, if you're not so worried about approval, you can say "thanks but no thanks" and move on without caring that you didn't live up to some random person's standards at your own expense.
    Thus a much better way of stating it, in my opinion, is, "do not borrow other people's standards. Have your own standards and work to live up to them." Most of the guys you're criticizing, those unkempt "take me as I am" types, aren't there yet. They're just experimenting with an alternate means of seeking approval by impressing other people. In this case they've heard about the importance of "not caring what others think" and they're trying to put on a performance of what they imagine that trait looks like because they still do care too much about what others think. It will fail them, of course, but mostly they've got to figure that out for themselves.
    [–]expaticus [score hidden]  (0 children)
    You're reading too much into it. It just means to do what is best for you and not worry about what others think you should do.
    [–]MikeCharlieUniform [score hidden]  (0 children)
    About 9/10ths of succeeding in life is based upon what other people think of you.
    Skipping past the definition of "succeeding in life", it's worth pointing out that you cannot control what other people think of you. You can't. It isn't possible.
    Be a good person because it is the right thing to do, and most of the rest of it will work out on its own.
    [–]idownvotestuff [score hidden]  (1 child)
    This is what I call "meaningless trite life advice".
    He still has the most upvotes. Joke's on you, sucker!
    [–]InVultusSolis [score hidden]  (0 children)
    People upvote stupid shit on Reddit all the time. I'm not too worried about it.
    [–]Ohchristmastreee [score hidden]  (0 children)
    You're missing the point of that saying. Your self perspective is the only perspective that matters as far as being happy in oneself. If you want to go to work in your bathrobe, and you get fired, well if that's what gives you happiness and allows you t feel fulfilled and happy that's all the matters.
    [–]TheRoseOfSolidarity 4 points5 points6 points  (0 children)
    I've been telling myself this for the last 3 years. It has finally stucked with me.
    [–]IncrediblySexyTomato 3 points4 points5 points  (0 children)
    So what you're saying is I don't have to wear clothes anymore? Yes
    [–]Jesse_Boyer 16 points17 points18 points  (0 children)
    This. This only and nothing else. Nothing about working out, nothing about being popular, nothing about making good choices, nothing.
    . Be your own person, do what makes YOU happy. . I have two kids, a boy and a girl, and this is one of the most important things I intend to teach both of them.
    [–]Drama79 63 points64 points65 points  (8 children)
    Put the pop tarts down.
    Stop bleaching your hair, you look like a fat member of Green Day.
    Keep watching all the movies. You learn visually, and you're essentially teaching yourself.
    And lastly - It's going to be fine - you've been a loner your whole life to this point, and the skills you've developed to get this far are what are going to make you fucking shine in a few years time. If I told you the adventures you're going to have, you wouldn't believe me but you'd be fucking stoked. Also, it's 2016 and you're still using the word "stoked". You should probably learn some other words.
    [–]xSnuggleBear 4 points5 points6 points  (1 child)
    If you're from CA stoked is still hella chill, you can use it.
    [–]flyawayjay 2 points3 points4 points  (0 children)
    Adventures? Story time!
    [–]New_Car_Wrecked [score hidden]  (0 children)
    Are you Guy Fieri?
    [–]blindmansarrow [score hidden]  (0 children)
    Stoked is a great word
    [–]finelytunedwalnut [score hidden]  (0 children)
    Whaaat I still use "stoked"...
    Then again I am also a loner in poor health who wishes I could go on adventures
    Shit I made myself sad
    [–]Aran55336 [score hidden]  (0 children)
    I love pop tarts....
    [–]Dave_MW [score hidden]  (0 children)
    . Also, it's 2016 and you're still using the word "stoked". You should probably learn some other words.
    Are you talking to yourself now? Or your past self.
    [–]anon0108 213 points214 points215 points  (8 children)
    see her? yeah. that one. she's fucking crazy. if you gotta sleep with her then go ahead but DO NOT try to build a relationship out of it no matter WHAT THE 2 OF YOU THINK YOU WANT. and wear a condom you fucking idiot.
    see that Fortune 500 job? yeah, don't take it. its not worth the money.
    your parents? listen don't take their condemnation to heart. no, you are NOT as bad as they are telling you. they are some damaged people who've never gotten help with what damaged them. its gonna spill over on you. sorry. get ready.
    [–]EdgarAllenPanda 32 points33 points34 points  (3 children)
    "your parents? listen don't take their condemnation to heart. no, you are NOT as bad as they are telling you. they are some damaged people who've never gotten help with what damaged them. its gonna spill over on you. sorry. get ready."
    This hit home hard. I think one of the major parts of growing up is realizing your parents aren't right about everything.
    [–]supermacrox5 [score hidden]  (0 children)
    This made me feel just a bit better about my day.
    [–]Tocoapuffs [score hidden]  (0 children)
    Was so mad at my parents because they could have done X or Y better while raising me. In like college I realized they were trying and probably tired (I'm the last of 5) from raising everyone else.
    They criticize because they think they're trying to cause improvement. They work all of the time because they want to provide for you. They force you to go to church to try to give you something they hold dear to their heart. They say don't take that risk because they care about you and always think of the worst scenerio.
    There are books and stuff on good parenting, but it's not easy to keep up to date on that while they age.
    [–]ryzzie [score hidden]  (0 children)
    is realizing your parents *are only human.
    [–]fwisd0m 1 point2 points3 points  (2 children)
    Why not take a fortune 500 job? (I'm a ignorant stupid 17 y/o i don't have much life experience)
    [–]anon0108 4 points5 points6 points  (1 child)
    There's nothing wrong with them in general.
    But given my personality at 22, hell given my personality now, the corporate culture at fortune 500 companies does not meshh well with what I find important.
    Took me 4 years to figure that out
    [–]yo_dj [score hidden]  (0 children)
    At least you got that four years of experience, now you can more easily do what you want. Grad degree, career change, you name it. No need to regret that one.
    [–]DaMan11[🍰] 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
    Welp. Checked off number one the wrong way, working on fucking up 2 and 3.
    [–]siouxsie_siouxv2 71 points72 points73 points  (10 children)
    Don't worry, it will all work out in the end!
    [–]idiopithic 21 points22 points23 points  (2 children)
    That's less of a scream and more of a hug, but maybe compassion for who you were then is compassion for who you are now.
    [–]Steinberg1 3 points4 points5 points  (0 children)
    DON'T WORRY IT WILL ALL WORK OUT IN THE END!!!!
    [–]blindmansarrow [score hidden]  (0 children)
    Nah worrying all the time can fuck tour shit up, not a bad idea to scream it.
    [–]DevotedToNeurosis 5 points6 points7 points  (0 children)
    Don't worry, you'll rationalize whatever path you choose as the correct one retro-actively!
    [–]Gl33m 2 points3 points4 points  (1 child)
    So you're telling your past self to be more open to anal?
    [–]siouxsie_siouxv2 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
    be more open
    Best advice for anal
    [–]bloodycreature 1 point2 points3 points  (1 child)
    As a 19 yo, i always tell myself that it's okay, don't get too stressed, everyone is also a mess they're just good at hiding it.
    [–]siouxsie_siouxv2 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
    Late teens/early 20's are some of the most stressful years. Suddenly it dawns on you that oh yeah, you are actually going to have to do things to make your life work out. It's hard not knowing if you have it in you to succeed. But that stress motivates you and then 20 years later you're content almost all of the time.
    [–]Hayes231 1 point2 points3 points  (0 children)
    hey Siouxsie!
    [–]_dive_ [score hidden]  (0 children)
    "You have a lot more time than you realize, so don't be in such a rush to do it all".
    [–]erftonz 18 points19 points20 points  (2 children)
    you don't know nearly as much as you think you do... oh, and girls aren't just going to come and talk to you... ask out a bunch of girls you think are out of your league... also, settle the fuck down spaz. Talk a lot less and listen more. Stand up straight, nobody thinks you're dark and mysterious. You're not pulling that off at all.
    also, stop being so damn negative... oh, don't start smoking cigarettes either.
    Also, buckle down and finish school properly... it's important. Otherwise, you'll be back there when you're 40.
    [–]MostlyHorizontal [score hidden]  (1 child)
    Oh dear god, this is me right now
    [–]erftonz [score hidden]  (0 children)
    me too, man. me too.
    [–]SleepIsForChumps 94 points95 points96 points  (7 children)
    Stay in college, don't date that boy, don't marry that boy, it's okay to be geeky/nerdy and get the hell out of that town.
    [–]karmatir 2 points3 points4 points  (0 children)
    Life story here for me as well. Divorced, remarried, back to college and living somewhere else. Too bad it took so long.
    [–]HappyInNature 1 point2 points3 points  (1 child)
    Did you go back to college and divorce him?
    [–]SleepIsForChumps [score hidden]  (0 children)
    Divorced. Floundered a bit finding out who I was as an adult, then back to college. Now doing what I love.
    [–]dagormz 1 point2 points3 points  (2 children)
    As a college kid who smokes a lot, how did pot effect your academics and life in general?
    [–]greg4045 3 points4 points5 points  (0 children)
    As a former college stoner, I was able to meet a lot of people through the social act of smoking. After college, most of them got piss test jobs and now we have little in common.
    Woe is me, a lonely pothead who employs himself and travels the world 4 months a year whilst my friends work their piss test jobs.
    WOE WILL BE YOU!! ....Its not that bad ;)
    [–]SleepIsForChumps [score hidden]  (0 children)
    I never smoked pot. Hung out with the stoners in high school. I was the girl who drank like a fish however. I was a clever child. I credit that more to having excellent memorization skills. Academics was pretty much me memorizing the chapter and then quoting it back in my own words for tests.
    Life in general? I slowed down my drinking, maybe two drinks a week. Hangovers aren't worth it when I'm really just wanting the relaxing buzz while I netflix with the spouse before bed.
    [–]Nickonthepc [score hidden]  (0 children)
    Did leaving your hometown help? Currently in that state of emergency to leave
    [–]MalenkoMC 36 points37 points38 points  (1 child)
    GO TO COLLEGE AND ACTUALLY TRY!!! Get that shit out of the way before you are 30!!!
    [–]TheBIackRose [score hidden]  (0 children)
    I'm 25 about to graduate with my undergrad after clawing my gpa up from a 1.8 to a 3.4. But now I don't know what to do.....
    [–]flibbidygibbit 53 points54 points55 points  (7 children)
    Journalism? What the hell are you thinking?
    Get that network management degree from the community college and pull network cables. You're going to be under-employed anyways, you might as well do something interesting that pays better and is more fulfilling than a call center.
    [–]dogpersonwithacat 3 points4 points5 points  (0 children)
    To be fair, if you're making better pay in a different field that's in high demand, you're not underemployed, you're just employed in a different field than you'd wanted to be in. Underemployed is for people who are earning far below their wage potential at low-skill jobs--hence the "under."
    [–]isotaco 1 point2 points3 points  (1 child)
    tbh, that sounds a lot less interesting than journalism
    [–]Kino_Eye [score hidden]  (0 children)
    You've clearly never sat through a school board meeting. Like I did last night for six hours. Pulling network cables sounds like a laugh riot after that.
    I think I need a new job.
    [–]Battleroid 0 points1 point2 points  (1 child)
    Dunno, my father made quite a career out of a single bachelor's degree in journalism.
    [–]Bomb_Tombadil [score hidden]  (0 children)
    Wow, I feel better. I just signed up for network management at my local community college instead of a journalism degree.
    [–]some_random_kaluna [score hidden]  (0 children)
    Also take this to heart:
    If you have footage of something newsworthy, send it in to the stations. They'll air it with your name.
    Congrats: you're what they call a "stringer".
    [–]NDRoughNeck 35 points36 points37 points  (4 children)
    Quit smoking you dumbass.
    [–]Throwawayidontcare22 0 points1 point2 points  (1 child)
    How has it negatively effected you?
    [–]NDRoughNeck 1 point2 points3 points  (0 children)
    Health, Health, and Health.
    [–]ChanadalerBong [score hidden]  (1 child)
    Read that like Red from That 70's Show.
    [–]NDRoughNeck [score hidden]  (0 children)
    I typed it that way too....lol
    [–]adverb_adjective 35 points36 points37 points  (1 child)
    You don't listen to anyone, which I'm assuming includes your future self, so fuck it. There's nothing I can say that will change your life. But seriously, don't marry that chick. Doesnt end well.
    [–]yegtoyyz [score hidden]  (0 children)
    this.
    The title of this post should be "would you give your 20 yo self advice or punch him in the face". I'd punch. lol.
    [–]accountonreddit1234 59 points60 points61 points  (8 children)
    Don't. Ever. Touch. WoW.
    [–]Lyryx92 2 points3 points4 points  (0 children)
    I laughed pretty hard.
    [–]walkitoffloser 1 point2 points3 points  (0 children)
    preach. lol.
    [–]Kim-chan [score hidden]  (1 child)
    Did you just say.... THUNDERFURY, BLESSED BLADE OF THE WINDSEEKER!?
    But seriously, no regrets.
    [–]ep1939 [score hidden]  (0 children)
    Just wasted 2 years of my life.
    Had some fun? Yes.
    Met some nice people? Yes.
    Could I have much more fun and meet people that would really stick in my life? Yes.
    [–]emmettiow 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
    My names emmettiow, I am 27yo, and I am a former addict.
    [–]KernalBacon [score hidden]  (0 children)
    I'm glad I never had the money for WoW when it first became popular.
    [–]Penthakee [score hidden]  (1 child)
    just got back into it again, it's much better than before. AAAAND my life is gone again.
    [–]accountonreddit1234 [score hidden]  (0 children)
    It's been good many times before, it's been bad many times before. It's never been worth it.
    [–]re7erse 33 points34 points35 points  (4 children)
    Just go to the gym, I don't want to hear any more excuses.
    [–]tCaFoaG 1 point2 points3 points  (2 children)
    My BMI is at about 35. :( I'm 15.
    [–]pina_koala 3 points4 points5 points  (0 children)
    Start now. You'll be happy that you did before summer, and you'll want to continue. Health is the fountain from which all good things come. /r/fitness is very supportive and they'll answer all of your questions.
    [–]QuesoPantera [score hidden]  (0 children)
    You're me. Graduated HS a bitter virgin, wasted 3/4 of college being sorry for myself. Got pressured to go to a doctor and I was prediabetic and prescribed lipitor. At 20!
    I tore it up and begged meat head friend for help instead. Weights and cardio, 3 - 4 times a week and a strict diet lost 70 lbs in 9 months. Confidence and girls ensued. Do it now, make your brain call the shots and your body will get used to it.
    Remember, if you leave town to go to college you get to start your reputation all over again.
    [–]BWZA 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
    I dont want to
    [–]ElectronicNightmare 69 points70 points71 points  (11 children)
    Jesus Fucking Christ, you idiot... don't get a god damn fucking credit card...
    Also, work through college - the education you get in the classroom is about 1/4 as important as the education you get in any job.
    AND DONT PLAY WORLD OF WARCRAFT FOR 50+ HOURS PER WEEK!
    [–]DrCybrus 5 points6 points7 points  (1 child)
    I got a credit card, use it to pay for mostly everything, and then pay it back on full automatic payments and usually manually pay it back daily. I've got great credit, I keep getting raises to my limit, and I'm only 22. I do work in college (in the college's IT department for 3 years now). Only problem is I have a horrible addiction to games, mostly because I can't find anything else to do.
    [–]edinburg [score hidden]  (0 children)
    Don't waste your time manually paying your card off daily. As long as you have autopay set to pay the full balance you won't be charged any interest. If you charge the card at the beginning of the billing cycle and let the autopay pay it off on the due date you will have gotten a free two-month loan and expended absolutely zero effort. Also, as paradoxical as it seems you actually get better credit if you have a small balance on your account at the end of each billing cycle, which will always happen if you let the autopay do its thing. The only exception is if you routinely spend more than 1/3 your limit every month, then you might want to manually pay some back before the end of the cycle since it becomes less good for your credit to have a statement balance of over 30% or so.
    Some other tips: once you have several years of regular card spending on your record and assuming you have a good income to housing expenses ratio you will be accepted for almost any card you apply for. You can use this to your advantage by getting a bunch of free loyalty programs that work well together. Different companies offer cards with higher cashback for different things (3% at Amazon from Amazon, 3% on gas from Bank of America, 3% on restaurants [or something else of your choice] from Huntington, 3% on groceries from American Express, 5% rotating categories from Chase and Discover), with enough cards you can get 3%-5% back on almost every purchase you make (just don't ever apply for a card that has an annual fee). Some good ones are the Citi double cash card that has 2% back on every purchase (great for utilities), Bank of America which will routinely mail you checks that allow you take out interest-free cash loans against the card for up to the full limit for over a year (as long as you don't use the card for anything else in that time), and American Express which will triple your credit limit after six months several times if you ask.
    Also, since many cards offer a $100+ sign-up bonus if you spend several hundred dollars in the first few months, if you wait to apply for a card you have your eye on until you know you have a big purchase coming up you can easily nab that bonus each time. I would go so far as to say you should almost never apply for a card that doesn't have such an offer, as well as never doing so unless you know you are already planning to hit the required amount of spending.
    [–]Nictionary 5 points6 points7 points  (5 children)
    Why would you not get a credit card? As long as you pay it off every month it's great to have.
    [–]thedudeabides152 3 points4 points5 points  (0 children)
    Maybe his younger self was the type of person not to pay off the balance or something
    [–]walkitoffloser 1 point2 points3 points  (2 children)
    or if you charge too much and can't pay it off your left with thousands in debt and your min payments (the only thing you can afford) only covers the interest
    [–]Nictionary [score hidden]  (0 children)
    So don't do that? The problem isn't with the card, it's with spending money you don't have.
    [–]dreadcain 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
    It usually doesn't even cover that
    [–]thedudeabides152 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
    Maybe his younger self was the type of person not to pay off the balance or something
    [–]walkitoffloser 2 points3 points4 points  (0 children)
    this applies to me lol, god i wish i hadn't wasted so much time play WoW
    [–]Damon980 [score hidden]  (0 children)
    are you future me.....?
    [–]slowdrivers [score hidden]  (0 children)
    Funny, I would say the opposite to myself -- forget about the shit paying jobs in college and just study and build something or contribute to open source projects (computer science).
    [–]sward11 29 points30 points31 points  (2 children)
    I'm only 27, but this is what I would like to say: Get help for your depression NOW so it doesn't ruin your college career. Then start actually taking advantage of the opportunities your super awesome university has so when you graduate, you can do something cool and not get a desk job like you have planned your whole life.
    [–]lushiecat 1 point2 points3 points  (1 child)
    Getting help for depression only works if you realise you have depression. I thought at best I had a two week bout of depression when I was 15.
    Oh. So it's not normal to feel like this your entire life.
    Oh, so I was depressed as a kid as well. Fucking awesome.
    [–]sward11 1 point2 points3 points  (0 children)
    Thanks. I'm not depressed anymore, but looking back, I never realized how bad it was. I was fine when I started college - typical over achiever and all that. I went from a 3.8 after freshman year to almost failing out. It took everything in me to finish, and my degree wasn't hard. If I had just gotten help, or even taken a semester off, I would have been so much better. I'm smart. I could have rocked college. My mind is in a much healthier, happier place now.
    Depression is one hell of a monster. You have to decide to get it fixed, get help, etc., but you can't because you're depressed and probably don't even realize it, as in your experience. I couldn't imagine going through that as a teenager. I hope you're better and thriving.
    [–]AnchovieProton 76 points77 points78 points  (9 children)
    You don't know shit!
    [–]pvbob 12 points13 points14 points  (1 child)
    Great advice!
    [–]ComeToTermsWithIt 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
    My little brother (now 25) said once "I remember when I was 21 and thought I knew everything." You don't even need to be 35 to know that you really do not know anything when you are younger even though you swear up and down that you do.
    [–]OhLookAnAirplane 3 points4 points5 points  (0 children)
    I really don't.
    Source: Am 22.
    [–]clothespinned 1 point2 points3 points  (0 children)
    YOU WANNA KNOW HOW I KNOW? I STILL DON'T KNOW SHIT.
    [–]Salvationunending [score hidden]  (0 children)
    Pretty fucking much
    [–]_dive_ [score hidden]  (0 children)
    Early 20s me was an arrogant know-it-all. It doesn't help anyone or yourself. Be humble and willing to learn new things. Don't brag. Listen more than you speak... actually... just STFU for a while. People think you're full of it.
    [–]degenerate_DJ 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
    That you Jon?
    [–]thirdfounder 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
    Exactly. Shut the fuck up and listen.
    [–]41anddone 14 points15 points16 points  (3 children)
    Travel, you idiot!
    [–]OhLookAnAirplane 2 points3 points4 points  (3 children)
    I never got to travel when I was young (only 22 now so not so bad I guess). My dad was always absorbed in his work and we never took vacations, which he now openly regrets.
    For the first time ever, I'm leaving the US in March. My dad and I are taking a trip to London and I couldn't be more excited to FINALLY get to do something.
    I'm really hoping this trip will spur more travel, I'd love to take yearly trips or something like that.
    [–]Ape1 1 point2 points3 points  (2 children)
    Get out of London, It's not that fun for more than 3 days or so. Go to Wales and go castle sightseeing or something.
    [–]OhLookAnAirplane 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
    I think that was the plan. We don't have a whole lot on the agenda, aside from the RAF Museum (both pilots, it's a must do thing). We're sorta just gonna go day by day, I think.
    [–]MyQueendoesntlikeyou [score hidden]  (0 children)
    I live in london. London will easily be amazing for a good 2 weeks if you have tons of money, say £200 a day to spend. Otherwise yea, you can see and do all the normal touristy stuff in 2 days.
    [–]calmclear 15 points16 points17 points  (1 child)
    For the love of God, eat healthy! Don't bother going to the gym it's too hard to follow through. Do join a workout class where someone tells you exactly what to do. Do not get fat not even a few lbs. Learn to meditate, it's better than anti-anxiety meds. Don't be so judgmental, it's a reflection on you and not others. Save money. Life is long, and you'll live most of it old. If I had every nickel I spent on worthless stuff I don't own anymore I'd be able to retire. Plan to retire way early, maybe you live in a camper, maybe you travel the world. Don't buy stuff, it's a trap… Wait to get pets until your 35+ so you don't have someone keeping you from traveling. Move out of the midwest sooner. Just do it. If you want something, go for it.
    [–]my_shoulder_devil [score hidden]  (0 children)
    I'm 24 and already realizing that all this nice stuff my SO and I have bought together is just holding us back. We're getting the hell out of Texas and moving back to the Rockies. We'd rather spend our money on a camper and climbing gear than a 50in TV and a mortgage.
    [–]JargonPhat 63 points64 points65 points  (38 children)
    Don't do MDMA.
    Occasional use is fine (even therapeutic in some cases), but continual use will change your brain and body chemistry drastically.
    [–]blighter711 5 points6 points7 points  (12 children)
    Yea... uh how much were you doing and how long?
    [–]JargonPhat [score hidden]  (11 children)
    From about 21 - 23 yrs old, I was doing every other weekend (sometimes every weekend). At first, it was maybe 2 - 3 over the course of the weekend. At worst, I was doing 12 in one sitting. Do not recommend.
    [–]blighter711 [score hidden]  (6 children)
    12 pills? 12 mg? 12 lbs? 12 hogsheads?
    [–]bluefootedboob [score hidden]  (3 children)
    Probably means 12 points, or 1.2 grams.
    [–]BesniLOL [score hidden]  (1 child)
    or 12 pills which could be over 2 grams of mdma
    [–]blighter711 [score hidden]  (0 children)
    whoa thats a lot
    [–]JargonPhat [score hidden]  (1 child)
    Pills. It was the late 90's, early 2000's. There was less structure in regards to measuring dosages.
    [–]BonerShoes [score hidden]  (1 child)
    Sounds like my situation, except every weekend for sure, and a couple days during the week. I built up quite the tolerance. Not sure what you mean by your numbering though. 2-3? 12? Doses? Typically, what size dose are you talkin?
    [–]JargonPhat [score hidden]  (0 children)
    Pills is the only measurement I can give you. It was the late 90's, early 2000's. We didn't (at least, in MY region of the US) have much in the way of learning/reporting dosages with dealers.
    [–]Coontang [score hidden]  (0 children)
    Holy shit. That's a lot, I can't imagine taking 12 points.
    [–]Fleeto95 [score hidden]  (0 children)
    This is some bad fucking news for a lot of people I know.
    [–]Corsair3820 7 points8 points9 points  (6 children)
    Ex early 2000's raver here. Can confirm.
    [–]Nriich 3 points4 points5 points  (4 children)
    Can you describe your experience for me? I am an very occasional user (3-5 times a year) and I know I probably should not use it.
    [–]TimeWaitsForNoMan [score hidden]  (1 child)
    So long as you're not doing more than ~200mg staggered over the course of the night, using 3-5 times a year is completely fine. Studies have shown negligible harm to infrequent, moderate use. Also, test your shit! Otherwise, though, you've nothing to worry about.
    [–]dalco [score hidden]  (1 child)
    Get a test kit. Police reports are saying MDMA is almost always bath salts now.
    [–]Kibubik [score hidden]  (0 children)
    Come on, there's no way. Do you have a source for that?
    [–]GordonGekkbro 2 points3 points4 points  (0 children)
    Please elaborate for us
    [–]Buck_Thunderpumper 2 points3 points4 points  (0 children)
    Yeah that's what I told all my e-tarded friends in the 90s. Most of them chased the rave feeling right into heroin addiction.
    [–]illBoopYaHead 1 point2 points3 points  (7 children)
    How has it affected you? I'm genuinely curious as I've used it maybe 10 times in the last year.
    [–]mosam17 7 points8 points9 points  (4 children)
    Anxiety, Depression, Anhedonia, Fear of things that didn't used to bother you, just a general falling apart that isn't easy to bounce back from
    [–]xSnuggleBear 0 points1 point2 points  (1 child)
    How much were you using, and how long did it take for you to start noticing these things? Someone I know has used it a few weekends out of the last couple months, and was actually surprised at how fine he feels. He was worried about all of the above, and other stories he had heard, especially about the comedown, but the day after he usually feels completely normal, if not better than normal even. I think three or four beers make him feel shittier the next day than MDMA.
    I understand there are probably long term effects, but how long? How heavy was your use?
    [–]illBoopYaHead [score hidden]  (0 children)
    I'm like your friend. Never had a problem, not even with a comedown. Alcohol makes me feel worse as well.
    I don't take a lot though. Maybe 150 to 300mg. On a rare occasion about 800mg in one entire day (festival).
    [–]OmeletteDuLeFromage [score hidden]  (0 children)
    Ironic how it can be used to relieve anxiety.
    [–]BonerShoes [score hidden]  (0 children)
    Damn. I definitely don't deny that it can have these long term affects. However, it is NOT the same for everyone. A few years back I was very addicted to MDMA, I did it constantly. The only adverse affects I've ever noticed only took place in the days surrounding my drug intake. I am perfectly fine now though.
    [–]Extre 1 point2 points3 points  (0 children)
    I m interested ... for a friend.
    [–]TimeWaitsForNoMan [score hidden]  (0 children)
    The heavy users might take 8 pills a night, every weekend, before getting the serotonin disruptions in the brain we see in people one might call "e-tarded". 10 is on the higher side, but assuming you're not doing 300+ mg a night, you're still not using like a hardcore pill head.
    [–]BestRbx 1 point2 points3 points  (0 children)
    Current young casual raver here, I think I missed an important pamphlet somewhere because I did not know that ._. Mind sharing a bit?
    [–]Vandilbg [score hidden]  (0 children)
    I can thank an unnamed Chicago audio\lighting technician for pointing this out first hand back at Assembly 96. Dude always had a big old bottle of caps but he was a walking talking example of don't abuse E.
    [–]fakehalo 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
    I only did it once, the best feeling I ever had in my life. I'm surprised I don't have the desire to do it more, probably for the best.
    [–]ColonelSanders_1930 308 points309 points310 points  (38 children)
    Don't sell your company to PepsiCo
    [–]FPJaques 54 points55 points56 points  (28 children)
    Story?
    [–]ColonelSanders_1930 320 points321 points322 points  (20 children)
    KFC isn't what it used to be. And I can't stand seeing Norm MacDonald as the face of the restaurant
    [–]FPJaques 60 points61 points62 points  (1 child)
    ah, didn't read your username. Thanks :)
    [–]atworkbeincovert 1 point2 points3 points  (0 children)
    All the more impressive they've been redditing for 2+ months. So they didn't make it just to comment here. Impressive
    [–]born_again_atheist 40 points41 points42 points  (10 children)
    Norm Macdonald is way better that that creepy fuck they had before him.
    [–]ColonelSanders_1930 13 points14 points15 points  (4 children)
    You're wrong. Darrell Hammond was 10 times more accurate
    [–]personalcheesecake 2 points3 points4 points  (0 children)
    Darrell Hammond is great
    [–]kjdflkas 3 points4 points5 points  (1 child)
    Why do you want it to be accurate? Colonel Sanders is dead. I love what they're doing with Norm; making fun of all the companies (themselves included) that try to pretend that the original spokesman is some immortal being. They make it obvious in the commercials that he's a poor Colonel Sanders impostor and that's the joke.
    [–]Forestisinthetrees [score hidden]  (0 children)
    Colonel Sanders isn't dead, he's the one who you replied to.
    [–]born_again_atheist 2 points3 points4 points  (0 children)
    Colonel knows best I suppose. But I still prefer Norm.
    [–]notashleyjudd 1 point2 points3 points  (2 children)
    Darrel Hammond? I respectfully disagree.
    [–]lundah -2 points-1 points0 points  (1 child)
    No, he was awkward and creepy as well, but still better in the role than Norm MacDonald.
    [–]notashleyjudd 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
    Um, that's what I said.
    [–]Kirkzillaa 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
    Preach!
    [–]Stax493 [score hidden]  (0 children)
    Preferred the creep.
    [–]lestranger_ 1 point2 points3 points  (0 children)
    Don't ever insult Norm MacDonald that man is a saint.
    [–]Tyzorg 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
    HAHAHA Colonel you drunk fuck. Go back to bed.
    [–]gamemachine6 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
    What are you babbling about? That's the REAL Colonel Sanders.
    [–]Pay-Me-No-Mind 0 points1 point2 points  (2 children)
    TIL KFC is owned by PepsiCo.
    [–]kamekazi_crotch 0 points1 point2 points  (1 child)
    Not any more. KFC is owned by Yum Brads who also owns Pizza Hut and Taco Bell
    [–]Pay-Me-No-Mind [score hidden]  (0 children)
    Woah!
    Talk about monopoly.. Am not American so those are the only ones I hear about in that business. So the fact that they're owned by one company is insane.
    [–]the_killionaire1 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
    You wouldn't know, you're too drunk to taste the chicken anyway.
    [–]TheKayWok 6 points7 points8 points  (6 children)
    KFC was sold to PepsiCo I believe.
    [–]FPJaques 10 points11 points12 points  (0 children)
    Didn't read his username. Now I get it ;)
    [–]1dirtypig 1 point2 points3 points  (4 children)
    I thought it was Yum! Brands
    [–]chamender3 3 points4 points5 points  (3 children)
    Yum! Bought KFC, Long John Silvers, and Pizza Hut (maybe 1 more) from PepsiCo
    [–]Mayneman304 1 point2 points3 points  (0 children)
    Taco bell too
    [–]ohnjaynb 0 points1 point2 points  (1 child)
    Yeah, this is one of those things that keeps me up at night(don't judge me). What exactly is the current relationship between Yum! brands and PepsiCo?
    [–]kamekazi_crotch 1 point2 points3 points  (0 children)
    I can answer that for you. Pepsi spun off its restaurant division into a company called TriCon (Three Concepts) which consisted of KFC, Pizza Hut, and Taco bell. TriCon then acquired A&W and Long John Silvers, so the three concepts brand didn't make sense so it was rebranded to Yum Brands (Yum was the stock ticker for TriCon). Today there is a still a strong relationship between pepsi and all Yum restaurants as TriCon basically agreed to only serve PepsiCo products in all their restaurants forever. Yum also gets some benefits from that such as special products like Baja Blast and other Yum only beverages.
    Source: Work for Yum
    Edit: Yum's US headquarters used to be PepsiCo offices. They still have some people who work there due to the huge amount of business.
    [–]CaneVandas 1 point2 points3 points  (3 children)
    You didn't. You sold it to a couple of investors, who sold it to Heinlein, who was acquired by R.J. Reynolds, who sold it to Pesico.
    But hey, you're dead. So, quit whining.
    [–]drummer0702 0 points1 point2 points  (2 children)
    And has since been broken off from Pepsico
    [–]CaneVandas [score hidden]  (1 child)
    Yum! Brands is a spin-off and corporate partner with Pepsico. It hasn't gone too far.
    [–]drummer0702 [score hidden]  (0 children)
    I understand the relationship. It is just not accurate to say they are owned by Pepsico
    [–]VernonDent 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
    Yeah, but you sold your company to Heublein.
    [–]xsp4rrow 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
    username checks out
    [–]stalkedthelady 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
    This is a really lame attempt at a joke answer and everyone who upvoted this is retarded.
    [–]triGuitar 40 points41 points42 points  (7 children)
    Enjoy yourself. Start getting serious at about 25. Make a life plan. Review it every year.
    [–]uvwaex 4 points5 points6 points  (2 children)
    As someone who is starting to get serious at 25 I saw this with great relief
    [–]Ignisti 2 points3 points4 points  (1 child)
    As someone who is starting to get serious at 20, fuck.
    [–]ozhj [score hidden]  (0 children)
    You won't have to much time later on.
    [–]DeathbyHappy [score hidden]  (0 children)
    29 here, serious people are boring. Do what makes you happy.
    [–]karlw1 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
    I will hopefully be graduating when i'm 25 (2 years time) so i am taking this as good advice.
    [–]JohnsmiThunderscore 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
    Oh shit I'm two years late!
    [–]greg4045 [score hidden]  (0 children)
    Currently 25. Feels like the time to get my plan drawn up is fast approaching. Settling down sounded like absolute hell 2 years ago, but now it sounds pleasant.
    ...ladies??
    [–]StinkinFinger 60 points61 points62 points  (10 children)
    Save money earlier and learn how finance works. Diversification isn't just different stocks. It's that and real estate and cash and gold.
    [–]ds580 2 points3 points4 points  (0 children)
    This is a bit misleading...
    • Real estate can be good but you have to do your homework on places,
    • cash has no investment value but the liquidity is important to have for a certain amount,
    • don't invest in individual stocks,
    [–]ComeToTermsWithIt 3 points4 points5 points  (3 children)
    I'm no spring chicken but that is good advice even now.
    [–]greg4045 3 points4 points5 points  (0 children)
    I'm no space panda but my shoes are well-tied
    [–]Tinfoilpain 2 points3 points4 points  (0 children)
    I'm no fall turkey but I can confirm.
    [–]curiously_Altoids 1 point2 points3 points  (0 children)
    .....winter chicken? no can't be that...summer chicken? no still not right.....must be a autumn chicken....
    [–]DrMarioLutherKing 1 point2 points3 points  (3 children)
    What kind of real estate we talkin?
    [–]Woxvis 1 point2 points3 points  (1 child)
    Meth
    [–]curiously_Altoids 1 point2 points3 points  (0 children)
    Meth, the REAL real-estate
    [–]StinkinFinger 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
    If you can't afford a place of your own you can buy into what is called a real estate investment trust (REIT). Basically it's a fund that invests in real estate. The advantage of buying your own home is that it is diversification and you end up in the long run with no rent.
    [–]Sealyy 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
    and some bitcoins!
    [–]playblu 114 points115 points116 points  (10 children)
    Dump a girl if she ever hits you. Add a second major in computer programming and don't drop it if it gets difficult. Never start dating someone unless you'll be living near them 6 months later.
    [–]briandeli99 4 points5 points6 points  (0 children)
    The latter is the words of the wise, my friend
    [–]sirmadam [score hidden]  (0 children)
    That's it then, I'm moving to Thailand. Thank you kind stranger.
    [–]JamealTheSeal 1 point2 points3 points  (1 child)
    I'm in college and I havent officially picked my major yet but I plan on doing a double major in computer science and business management. The idea is that I could work my way up to being some sort of team leader in a programming environment working for a big company like microsoft. Do you think that's a good idea?
    [–]thnksfrthemmrs [score hidden]  (0 children)
    If you can handle the stress, absolutely. But be honest with yourself. The last thing you want is to burn out halfway through college and drop out.
    Take your time. Learn because you want to, not because you feel like you need to perform.
    Another option would be to complete the computer science degree and then get an MBA, either right after earning the first degree or after working in industry for a few years.
    [–]eatingisoverrated 1 point2 points3 points  (2 children)
    Never start dating someone unless you'll be living near them 6 months later.
    THIS. A million times this. This is the best advice EVER, especially if you're in your early/mid 20s.
    [–]COYSpurs203 [score hidden]  (1 child)
    I'm sorry but I could not understand what that phrase meant. Could you explain?
    [–]jojoga [score hidden]  (0 children)
    Long distance relationships you start over the internet or on a stay abroad are not going to be cake and fun.
    [–]i_draw_touhou 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
    Being 22 and reading all this advice to get a second major here, y'all seem to have forgotten how damn difficult it was just getting a single major, haha!
    [–]10ocupado [score hidden]  (0 children)
    don't drop it if it gets difficult
    Its serves for anything
    [–]jojoga [score hidden]  (0 children)
    Wow, I could have used that last advice. Long distance relationships between Central Europe and Japan are tough!
    [–]LucifersDuckling 181 points182 points183 points  (34 children)
    I'm only 19... "Get your life together you lazy sack of shit!"
    [–]notahipster- 92 points93 points94 points  (20 children)
    21 here, mines the same but louder since it's still not together.
    [–]TheHollowJester 52 points53 points54 points  (14 children)
    26 reporting in; getting-shit-together still in progress.
    I should probably decide on some victory conditions to know when I'm done; there's always some shit you could be doing better.
    [–]biscuitwise 39 points40 points41 points  (7 children)
    23 report; not a single shit connecting idea in sight
    [–]IHadACatOnce 1 point2 points3 points  (1 child)
    23 here, I guess it's too early for me to see where i fucked up, but too late to fix it.
    [–]notahipster- 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
    I fucked up several times. Whenever life kicks me in the ass, I run away from it and that's what fucks me the hell over.
    [–]tcpip4lyfe 1 point2 points3 points  (1 child)
    It just gets louder when you're in your 30s. I've found drugs and alcohol do a good job at silencing it.
    [–]notahipster- 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
    Already started drinking a decent amount. Although I think for me it's just making it worse.
    [–]dacotahd [score hidden]  (0 children)
    Yup
    Sitting here feeling useless and came across this
    21 here, but I guess it's nice to know I'm not alone
    I mean I am, but you know
    [–]NoomOken 61 points62 points63 points  (9 children)
    1. Your religion is a cult
    2. You are gay, and that is okay.
    3. Find a man and be safe and happy.
    [–]lowlightsource 52 points53 points54 points  (12 children)
    Stop smoking weed every goddamn day!
    [–]thomas80anderson 11 points12 points13 points  (1 child)
    It's true when they say that things can get better, it won't be this bad forever.
    [–]Rosaly8 1 point2 points3 points  (0 children)
    Are you sure? That would mean a lot to me.
    [–]nopedotswf 93 points94 points95 points  (2 children)
    Don't quit trying to find a solution for your chronic pain. It's not going to go away.
    Also stay in college.
    Also she's a good fuck but she's cheating on you. Leave before she ruins you like she did me.
    [–]Faces_in_the_Rock 37 points38 points39 points  (2 children)
    Stop thinking, and start doing. Stop being so judgmental of other people. Video games, bars, endless Internet surfing and tv are not a good use of time. Go live abroad for a year, you might not get that chance again. Get organized and get disciplined.
    [–]nordic_barnacles 20 points21 points22 points  (1 child)
    You don't have to lift that. Sincerely, your back.
    [–]sirpilsofd 10 points11 points12 points  (0 children)
    EXERCISE!!!
    [–]HamburgerMonkeyPants 10 points11 points12 points  (0 children)
    You will always think you are fat. Days from now you'll look back at your 20s and remember how fat you used to be - when you really weren't. Its all in your head!
    [–]Ghostwoods 25 points26 points27 points  (14 children)
    DUCK!
    [–]JSmoothie 7 points8 points9 points  (8 children)
    26 here but there's a lot of shit I'd like to say to my 18yo self. Like "hey the army is an option" wish I would have joined out of highschool and gone to school then.
    [–]JayTS 8 points9 points10 points  (0 children)
    You're not as smart as you think you are. Your core classes are easy because you went to a really good high school. As soon as you start taking courses you've never studied before, you're gonna have to study and go to class if you want to pass.
    Go on that study abroad trip. You're really going to regret not following through with your paperwork.
    [–]stacksuponstacks 64 points65 points66 points  (30 children)
    Do not get married! Do not buy a house!
    [–]chips_y_salsaaa 128 points129 points130 points  (3 children)
    Do not pass Go! And do not collect $200!
    [–]Spytap 7 points8 points9 points  (1 child)
    Start working out now. When you wait until you're nearly 30 to begin, it makes the whole process infinitely harder.
    Learn to code! Much of your life will be easier if you have the basic knowledge to demo and participate instead of crudely drawing shit on index cards. And then you won't be the old guy learning Python because it's supposedly the "easiest" to learn when you don't know shit.
    She's not "the one" but she'll end up your best friend, and you'll both find people you're happier (and more stable) with. Work it out, don't burn bridges, you'll still want to be in each others' lives, just not that way.
    [–]grandplans 6 points7 points8 points  (1 child)
    I wouldn't scream it, I would very calmly and gently say:
    Relax. Enjoy this. Life will never be easier than it is right now.
    I may say to myself a bit more firmly
    Be more Careful with your money. Oh and buy shares of Apple
    [–]grizzly-grr 7 points8 points9 points  (1 child)
    DO NOT PUT EVERYTHING IN YOUR LIFE ON CREDIT! And stay the fuck away from Frank!!
    [–]Yambag_the_Barbarian 33 points34 points35 points  (22 children)
    STAY AWAY FROM ALYSON!
    [–]Definately_God 22 points23 points24 points  (19 children)
    Shit, Alyson gets your time travel advice and all caps, what the fuck did Alyson do?
    [–]Yambag_the_Barbarian 32 points33 points34 points  (16 children)
    We were together for 5 years, and in that span she slept with 5 of my best friends (not my friends anymore), destroyed my brand new car in a bar parking lot, and got me jumped at a party. Those are the big talking points. There is a ton of other little things that happened as well. As good as the pussy is, DO NOT, under any circumstances, stick your dick in crazy.
    [–]TheLabyrinthOfMaps 10 points11 points12 points  (1 child)
    That's a lot of 'best' friends.
    [–]the_darkest_side 55 points56 points57 points  (9 children)
    Go to university, don't start smoking weed and then continue to do so for twenty years.
    [–]SecretAgentZeroNine 13 points14 points15 points  (2 children)
    Trade school >>>>>> college
    [–]psclafani 29 points30 points31 points  (7 children)
    Quit smoking and have more sex.
    [–]TheRoseOfSolidarity 23 points24 points25 points  (6 children)
    Unfortunately what happened to me was reversed.
    [–]tfusayin 8 points9 points10 points  (1 child)
    quit sex and have more smoking
    [–]tanman1975 39 points40 points41 points  (7 children)
    You're not just lazy! YOU HAVE ADHD! Get treated immediately!
    [–]BillCosbysButler 24 points25 points26 points  (4 children)
    Push your fingers into your eyes!!
    [–]aqsis 5 points6 points7 points  (1 child)
    Never settle for what you have because it's easy, start each day asking if you want to do this, and if not, do something about it, before it's too late.
    [–]tick2010 5 points6 points7 points  (0 children)
    STOP SMOKING NOW!
    [–]trentdarby126 6 points7 points8 points  (0 children)
    Don't borrow money. Switch jobs, and start saving you fucking idiot.
    [–]beachedsailor 5 points6 points7 points  (0 children)
    Tell her you like her you idiot!
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