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Damn girl are you a Rubik's cube? (self.Jokes)

flare_phoenix が 投稿

Because fuck you, you stupid piece of shit.

上位 200 件のコメント全て表示する 338
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[–]Falardeau 926ポイント927ポイント  (55子コメント)

Because I'm done in 30 seconds

[–]dudebroth 116ポイント117ポイント  (12子コメント)

But that's a compliment

[–]sillythaumatrope 46ポイント47ポイント  (16子コメント)

It takes me 3 hours, then i smash it into pieces and try to put it back together, after crying. edit: The rubiks cube is also pretty hard.

[–]ASCIIpotatos 14ポイント15ポイント  (5子コメント)

come over to /r/cubers and learn. It's not that difficult once you get a a hang of it.

[–]vonunov 3ポイント4ポイント  (9子コメント)

Are you trying to do it by yourself, because it's pretty much impossible if you don't know how to do it. It's more an algorithm than some kind of amazing spatial genius. I started a couple of weeks ago and I'm under 4 minutes, which actually kinda sucks.

[–]ryumichael 1ポイント2ポイント  (5子コメント)

Yea, if you are using the same method as me(which i would assume since its the first and easier one most people learn) than 4 minutes is pretty slow, and i think about 1:30-2 is the lowest time you are going to get

コメントをもっと表示する (3 返事)

    [–]TragicKid 22ポイント23ポイント  (7子コメント)

    Wow that's long.

    [–]ghettotuesday 14ポイント15ポイント  (4子コメント)

    That's what she said

    [–]tuibiel 17ポイント18ポイント  (3子コメント)

    *didn't say

    [–]ghettotuesday 10ポイント11ポイント  (2子コメント)

    Hey you take that back

    [–]LyingForTruth 11ポイント12ポイント  (0子コメント)

    You can't give the herpes back, that's not how this works.

    That's not how any of this works.

    [–]wasprobot 7ポイント8ポイント  (0子コメント)

    Take that in the back?

    [–]SecretiveNarwhals 3ポイント4ポイント  (0子コメント)

    look at mr stamina over here

    [–]iliketowhispertoo 3ポイント4ポイント  (0子コメント)

    He's a showoff

    [–]Jazzbone 5ポイント6ポイント  (1子コメント)

    because I'm done in thirty seconds

    And you never get finished

    [–]itsnotallbadmom [スコア非表示]  (0子コメント)

    Yes. He edged out my old mark by two seconds... and 16 minutes... and 12 hours. I do plan to finish someday, Kif.

    [–]Eldaia 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

    No need to brag about it!

    コメントをもっと表示する (13 返事)

      [–]CallMeJeanz 971ポイント972ポイント  (32子コメント)

      ...because you're fucking difficult

      [–]Steaky92 379ポイント380ポイント  (14子コメント)

      .....And because every fucking side of you is never the same.

      [–]starstarstar42 236ポイント237ポイント  (10子コメント)

      ..and because when i'm finally SICK and TIRED of your SHIT and I just can't take it any more, I peel your clothes off and re-arrange them on you to look the way I want them to and, and, and !!!...

      ...

      <looks around>

      ...

      I'll see myself out

      [–]smoresgalore15 54ポイント55ポイント  (8子コメント)

      But it was just getting good

      [–]Thisoneismyfavourite 6ポイント7ポイント  (1子コメント)

      Too good if you ask me.

      [–]use_a_choosername1 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

      damn son ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

      [–]srkambbs1 15ポイント16ポイント  (5子コメント)

      And then I break you again and through you in the garbage. Until a few days after, I find a piece of you stuck in me, which I proceed to flush.

      コメントをもっと表示する (1 返事)

        [–]jesterspaz 4ポイント5ポイント  (0子コメント)

        Just when you think you have it figured out, you still aren't even fucking close. Edit: the auto correct for fucking is ducking.

        [–]Alarid 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

        And I tear your stickers off and glue them back on to try to fix you

        [–]randomdefence 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

        Actually ....

        [–]Pairomedics 47ポイント48ポイント  (0子コメント)

        Because you have so many sides and faces, and no matter what I can't solve your shit.

        [–]difficult_lady 23ポイント24ポイント  (5子コメント)

        Why yes,,,yes I am.

        [–]Nitroserum 22ポイント23ポイント  (4子コメント)

        ,,,

        Combining the comma and the ellipsis. Revolutionary.

        [–]DFORKX 10ポイント11ポイント  (0子コメント)

        Typoriffic

        [–]I_love_swiss_cheese 4ポイント5ポイント  (2子コメント)

        A new punctuation symbol is born: commipsis,,,

        [–]cathode-ray-tube 7ポイント8ポイント  (1子コメント)

        That sounds like a nervous fit.

        [–]MasterSolar 3ポイント4ポイント  (1子コメント)

        Upvote, better than OP's punchline.

        [–]taway9777 3ポイント4ポイント  (0子コメント)

        OP's punchline was meant to be unexpected. Similar to what you would find in /r/antijokes

        [–]JokerSage 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

        http://www.cube20.org/

        [–]theoneIusetosub 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

        I was gonna say complicated, but this is good too.

        コメントをもっと表示する (6 返事)

          [–]ChitChatJuiJitsu 177ポイント178ポイント  (17子コメント)

          Because top, right, top back, right back, top back, face back, top, face.

          [–]ShrekisSexy 109ポイント110ポイント  (2子コメント)

          don't you mean u,r,u',r',u',f',u,f?

          [–]GoToTell 69ポイント70ポイント  (0子コメント)

          Drowning in pussy algorithms, this one.

          [–]InsaneZee 4ポイント5ポイント  (0子コメント)

          Oh, fancy.

          [–]DragnHntr 22ポイント23ポイント  (12子コメント)

          Pfsh, learn to F2L noob ;)

          [–]TLDM 9ポイント10ポイント  (3子コメント)

          F2L? Now that is for noobs. Learn F2B!

          Edit: or you could just use petrus

          [–]DragnHntr 3ポイント4ポイント  (2子コメント)

          Haha, perhaps =p but the algorithm I replied to is like straight out of the beginner method.

          I am happy enough with my average sub 1 minute solve ;)

          [–]TLDM 2ポイント3ポイント  (1子コメント)

          Yeah, F2L is easier to learn after the beginner's method. F2B is part of the Roux method, which I think is a more fun method. It's also easy to get fast without learning many algs - and it looks cool for the people watching too!

          But cubing is something you plan on doing often then I don't think it's worth switching to.

          [–]DragnHntr 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

          Right on, good advice. =)

          [–]Cabooseman 5ポイント6ポイント  (4子コメント)

          F2L is not a fun time, I'd rather stick to what I know and collect different cubes

          [–]DragnHntr 2ポイント3ポイント  (1子コメント)

          Ha ha, I hear that. I have half a dozen 3x3 shape mods I enjoy. Can't be bothered to learn anything bigger =p

          I was hesitant to learn F2L too, until I saw that video I edited into my comment. It was fun to learn it intuitively rather than try to memorize a bunch of different little algorithms. =)

          [–]NotStevenPink 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

          Agreed! I learned F2L intuitively and, though I'm not 100% positive I know every way to solve the F2L cases, it was easy and I'm WAYYYY faster!

          [–]ASCIIpotatos 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

          Learn it intuitively. Its difficult at first but then it becomes pretty easy. No algorithms required if you learn intuitively.

          コメントをもっと表示する (1 返事)

            [–]FizzFoxFaxen 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

            Petrus here :)

            [–]Alphaetus_Prime 0ポイント1ポイント  (1子コメント)

            I watched that whole video and I still don't know what F2L means.

            [–]DragnHntr 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

            First 2 Layers. It means you solve the first two layers at the same time, which bypasses the algorithm that he referenced.

            コメントをもっと表示する (1 返事)

              [–]pandah 86ポイント87ポイント  (8子コメント)

              Nice steal, Rubick.

              [–]Ikamuzu-Ukir3 23ポイント24ポイント  (4子コメント)

              Because F U2

              [–]Hatchriani 162ポイント163ポイント  (22子コメント)

              I think all girls are kinda like rubix cubes, because I'm shit at figuring them out

              [–]ugotamesij 71ポイント72ポイント  (8子コメント)

              You can try unpeeling the stickers and then reapplying so they all match.

              This also applies for Rubix cubes.

              [–]jfb1337 17ポイント18ポイント  (5子コメント)

              You can also break them up into pieces and reassemble them in the correct way.

              This applies to Rubik's Cubes as well.

              [–]mrducky78 15ポイント16ポイント  (2子コメント)

              You can leave them in a dark dusty ward drobe under the stairs, forgotten and never to see the light of day except in a few years time.

              This applies to harry potter as well.

              コメントをもっと表示する (2 返事)

                コメントをもっと表示する (2 返事)

                  [–]PunjabiPlaya 45ポイント46ポイント  (6子コメント)

                  "Don't try to understand women. Women understand women and they hate each other." - Al Bundy

                  [–]MachineFknHead 9ポイント10ポイント  (0子コメント)

                  -Ted "ladies' man" Bundy

                  [–]willtheyeverlearn 6ポイント7ポイント  (4子コメント)

                  If this wasn't Al Bundy it might've become one of my fave quotes.

                  edit lol I'm a moron, I was thinking of Ted Bundy. This is now one of my fave quotes :)

                  [–]Dancatpro 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

                  I thought a variation of this would be the punchline :/

                  [–]NameTheory 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

                  Find a guide, read the guide and then follow exactly what the guide says without trying to improvise. It's really easy. Just forget about trying to understand how it actually works because it is actually magic.

                  [–]firetroll 0ポイント1ポイント  (1子コメント)

                  Slip her some rupees. She'll be in your bed instantly.

                  [–]Sweaty-Panda 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

                  I just don't have a rubix cube

                  [–]Azwildcat8892 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

                  We should just stick to video games. They are easier to figure out, and usually a hell of a lot more fun.

                  [–]drphilthay 14ポイント15ポイント  (1子コメント)

                  Hey girl, did it hurt? When you ascended through the earth's crust from hell?

                  [–]Fuzzy_Taco 3ポイント4ポイント  (0子コメント)

                  Not really, but the scrape on my knee hurts like a bitch.

                  [–]Tashre 129ポイント130ポイント  (7子コメント)

                  "Girls are like Rubik's cubes: with a simple algorithm, they're all easy to solve."

                  [–]quentin-coldwater 26ポイント27ポイント  (3子コメント)

                  Girls are like Rubiks cubes - they're all looking to exploit unsuspecting men because of the feminist agenda.

                  [–]Augustus1125 9ポイント10ポイント  (2子コメント)

                  Lol?

                  [–]ColonelSandersCult 18ポイント19ポイント  (1子コメント)

                  If you're unsure if you're laughing out loud, visit an ear doctor.

                  [–]merchantinging 14ポイント15ポイント  (0子コメント)

                  well, time to leave this thread

                  コメントをもっと表示する (2 返事)

                    [–]CleverUserName1980 11ポイント12ポイント  (0子コメント)

                    Because when I get frustrated I just turn to the Internet.

                    [–]mrflex13 9ポイント10ポイント  (1子コメント)

                    Because it takes me 15 moves to do you

                    [–]swng 5ポイント6ポイント  (0子コメント)

                    15 < 20

                    You have surpassed God's number.

                    [–]Erikz93 32ポイント33ポイント  (0子コメント)

                    Much like a Rubik's cube, easy to do once you know the right moves

                    [–]ArrowRobber[🍰] 23ポイント24ポイント  (3子コメント)

                    Am I the only one that wouldn't turn down a pretty girl that offered me a chance to rearrange stickers all over her body?

                    [–]WarLorax 7ポイント8ポイント  (2子コメント)

                    Taking the stickers off was too obvious. Pry the cubes off and reassemble.

                    [–]ArrowRobber[🍰] 6ポイント7ポイント  (0子コメント)

                    I guess that works if you're into mrs.potato head / some pretty kinky amputee/prosthetic stuff.

                    コメントをもっと表示する (1 返事)

                      [–]reddit_dude_71 4ポイント5ポイント  (0子コメント)

                      Because you're toying with me

                      [–]Foon19 10ポイント11ポイント  (5子コメント)

                      Isnt this an r/antijokes ? Im sorry if im wrong.

                      [–]MacGyverMacGuffin 9ポイント10ポイント  (0子コメント)

                      Apology accepted.

                      [–]ShrekisSexy 13ポイント14ポイント  (2子コメント)

                      antijokes are jokes too.

                      [–]Destiiel 11ポイント12ポイント  (0子コメント)

                      Do they annihilate when interacting with their respective joke?

                      コメントをもっと表示する (1 返事)

                        [–]Mutoid 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

                        Very nearly. But I still think the joke still lies on the positive half of the scale.

                        [–]ben314 3ポイント4ポイント  (0子コメント)

                        /r/cubers

                        [–]SorryImProbablyDrunk 7ポイント8ポイント  (0子コメント)

                        Because I feel like I've just wasted an hour and all I have to show for it are aching fingers.

                        [–]long-tom 2ポイント3ポイント  (1子コメント)

                        My dad fingered you in the 70s.

                        [–]hazmaximus 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

                        Because I can solve you in less than a minute and know how you work! Shout out to r/cubers

                        [–]MhmmmmHmm 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

                        No. I'm Rubix cube. Hard as hell, but my ex was super Christian. Awful with her hands so I wasn't finished the entire time we were together. But then I went to college and majored in engineering. Sure, I had to go the other way (because females in an engineering program are like ghosts..often talked about, with little proof they exist). But it was worth it because Amit could have finished me with his eyes closed.

                        [–]manpandad 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

                        That escalated quickly

                        [–]jaegerbombs33 3ポイント4ポイント  (1子コメント)

                        Cause I had to google how to do you

                        [–]flying_fat_guy 4ポイント5ポイント  (3子コメント)

                        Because you're R U R' U'

                        [–]TLDM 1ポイント2ポイント  (1子コメント)

                        :D

                        Do you know about /r/cubers?

                        [–]flying_fat_guy 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

                        No, actually. Thanks for notifying me about it, I'll go check it out.

                        [–]OfficialHughJanus 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

                        Easy to do quickly once properly lubed?

                        [–]calmcucumber 10ポイント11ポイント  (0子コメント)

                        Cause you square as fuck... bitch.

                        [–]toohardforthesecats 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

                        I pull all your stickers off and then place them back in the right place and tell people I completed you correctly.

                        [–]KingOfCubes 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

                        To all those cubers:

                        Hey are you a Rubik's cube?

                        Cuz I bet I could do you in 20 seconds

                        [–]C9_littlemer 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

                        Cause I can't figure you out and wasted to much time trying

                        [–]bardia132713 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

                        because i wanna mess you up for others

                        [–]2relevant 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

                        Because I can't finish you off.

                        [–]NateSoma 2ポイント3ポイント  (2子コメント)

                        I cant understand how this website has become known for misogyny

                        [–]I_ama_Borat 15ポイント16ポイント  (14子コメント)

                        I very much dislike these type of jokes.

                        [–]huffmyfarts 7ポイント8ポイント  (8子コメント)

                        Seriously, not even a little funny or clever. I don't know why this gets so popular.

                        [–]Gerden 17ポイント18ポイント  (2子コメント)

                        Probably because there are a lot of people with different tastes in humor. Maybe. Possibly.

                        [–]Kep0a 2ポイント3ポイント  (1子コメント)

                        There was a similar joke a day ago, don't remember what it was exactly but was creative, I think this is just a joke on that.

                        [–]Clobbersaurus7 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

                        Damn girl, are you a smoke detector? Because you're annoying and won't shut up. That might be the one

                        コメントをもっと表示する (2 返事)

                          コメントをもっと表示する (5 返事)

                            [–]BUSean 4ポイント5ポイント  (0子コメント)

                            "jokes"

                            [–]street_philosopher 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

                            Damn girl are you a rubix cube?

                            Because I'm not sexually attracted to rubix cubes

                            [–]troponinnutrition 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

                            Because you were interesting for about 5 minutes but now I just want to toss you in the junk drawer

                            [–]Vpie649 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

                            Yeah...you like that, you fucking retard?

                            [–]Tom_Bedlam 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

                            Cuz I would be happy with just one side of you.

                            [–]magicaxis 1ポイント2ポイント  (2子コメント)

                            The more I play with you, the harder I get

                            [–]Rfpower -1ポイント0ポイント  (0子コメント)

                            .. Because if I tried to do you it would end in 7 seconds

                            [–]Scandalicius 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

                            Because I don't understand you at all, and honestly, why do I even bother?

                            [–]AllanKempe 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

                            Well, you got algorithms for the Rubik's cube. I learned one in university as part of a project in a basic programming course and could actually use it in practice for some time until I forgot it. This was in the fall of 1999, I wouldn't waste time to learn it today.

                            [–]calcul8r 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

                            At first I thought you were mixed up, but now you're just being twisted.

                            [–]Knockfinger 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

                            Pff! Someone has obviously not bothered learning the correct moves

                            [–]Hungtingtong 0ポイント1ポイント  (1子コメント)

                            You are not. But I know I am, because the more you play with me the harder I get.

                            [–]nysv 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

                            ...because I could totally do you in few minutes?
                            ...because you are easy to complete after learning few moves?
                            ...because every robotics student makes a machine to solve you?
                            ...because even a lego set can do you?

                            [–]gammaplay 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

                            Lol too complicated for you?

                            [–]fred4201 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

                            Because you're fat, square and I suspect you're colourful.

                            [–]rockymountaineer1 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

                            Because you masquerade as a complex puzzle but really you defined all the arbitrary rules and just expect me to memorize them and never fuck up

                            [–]Shadoninja 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

                            Because every time I think I have you figured out, I make one wrong move and end up fucked.

                            [–]Bugbrain_04 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

                            'Cause I just can't figure you out.

                            [–]StandingChair 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

                            Because Right Inverted Down Inverted Right Down

                            [–]Broskavich1 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

                            lolololololololol

                            [–]northfall 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

                            But I can solve a rubik's cube, but I can't talk to girls...

                            [–]the-h8ful-m8 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

                            ...Because I feel like twisting your neck 180 degrees.

                            [–]Abcdq7 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

                            ...because I want to twist all of your stupid ligaments around until they snap off

                            [–]martypanic 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

                            The standards for humor in this sub are at an all time low

                            [–]greatslyfer 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

                            new meta incoming

                            [–]Vatrumyr 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

                            Because you are predictable and I can finish you in under a minute?

                            [–]zibiti 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

                            Does that mean I have the ability to solve all my problems?

                            [–]Rat-Tat-Tat-Tat 0ポイント1ポイント  (1子コメント)

                            Because I can break you?

                            [–]Suttonian 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

                            Because I want to break you and put you back together in a more pleasing manner.

                            [–]hotshot0123 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

                            Because fuck you, you stupid piece of shit.

                            it would have been better if you said, Because I couldn't figure you out.

                            [–]356afan 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

                            Because you have 6 faces and all of them are messed up.

                            [–]Brandon48236 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

                            Because you seem to be made of movable cubes.

                            [–]NickCageIsAWoman 0ポイント1ポイント  (1子コメント)

                            Nah, you're just an idiot

                            [–]erduenoeg 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

                            yeah... I've got news for you

                            [–]confirmSuspicions -1ポイント0ポイント  (0子コメント)

                            Because I could see me turnin your block, if ya know what I'm sayin.

                            [–]Servo35 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

                            Confucius says penis is like rubik's cube. The longer you play with it, the harder it gets.

                            [–]palmagranate 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

                            because you're a pain in the ass

                            [–]crazyderk 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

                            I laughed out loud in a pub because of this joke. People looked at me it, it got weird. I don't care though, take your upvote OP you mad bastard

                            [–]Theingloriousak2 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

                            Because I watched a video of someone doing you on the Internet

                            [–]MsPenguinette 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

                            You mean, I can finish myself in 2 minutes but you'd take a lifetime?

                            [–]CloggedNozzle 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

                            I think this was meant to be posted to /r/circlejerk

                            [–]gmsc 0ポイント1ポイント  (1子コメント)

                            Relevant: https://xkcd.com/457/

                            [–]xkcd_transcriber 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

                            Image

                            Title: Frustration

                            Title-text: 'Don't worry, I can do it in under a minute.' 'Yes, I've noticed.'

                            Comic Explanation

                            Stats: This comic has been referenced 23 times, representing 0.0275% of referenced xkcds.

                            xkcd.com | xkcd sub | Problems/Bugs? | Statistics | Stop Replying | Delete

                            [–]Omniderpectional 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

                            How about, Damn girl, are you a Rubik's cube? Because i can't figure your dumb ass out.

                            [–]RizzMustbolt 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

                            Because it's impossible to solve you in less than 20 moves.

                            [–]Wess_Mantooth_ 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

                            Because I peeled the outside off and put it back in proper order?

                            [–]toxipoly 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

                            Rubik's Cubes are easy. Especially with my Gans 356.

                            [–]dryjuly 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

                            Rude

                            [–]AmsterDayum 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

                            ITT: People too dumb and/or too impatient to figure out a rubik's cube.

                            [–]a9s 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

                            I have lots of Rubik's cubes. I also have lots of girls. I've never stuck my dick in either.

                            ...wait a moment.

                            Edit: It's official. I've stuck my dick in more Rubik's cubes than girls.

                            [–]Booblicle 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

                            Am I the only one that finds Rubik's cubes easy and fun?

                            [–]lowglowjoe 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

                            Because I'm gonna peel off your face and arrange it in the correct order.

                            [–]Billy_Not_Really 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

                            This somehow seems fitting

                            [–]ub3rb3n 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

                            "Because you confuse the shit out of me"

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