A lady I was sort-of-dating-but-not-really and I once got Chinese food from a food truck after a night of heavy drinking, to consume while traveling from one bar to the next. One of us dropped it almost immediately after purchase, and the Styrofoam food container landed food-side down, spilling Chinese food all up on the pavement. Most of it was safe inside the container, even though it couldn't really be scooped back in.

I'm in a wheelchair, so after collectively deciding that this food could NOT go to waste, I climbed down out of it to sit on the sidewalk next to our greasy pile and eat. Imagine the sight. A very small and hairy man sitting in between a dolled up and sparkly lady, and an empty wheelchair, inhaling Chinese food off of the pavement in front of them. We ate most of it. Aside from the occasional sidewalk pebble you'd pick out of your mouth, it was some of the best damn Chinese food I've ever fucking eaten in my life. It was so good in fact, that everyone we talked to at the next bar got to hear about how great our sidewalk Chinese food was.

God, I miss Portland. Everyone is perpetually 21 and a shitshow.