Gay Men + Misogyny + Sexual Assault

I asked my followers to send their experiences with sexual assault and Misogyny with gay men and this is what I got. 

 Women aren’t the only people who are targeted by gay misogyny, dfab trans people are targeted as well

I’m making this post because while, yes, misogyny is something that everyone is capable of perpetuating, gay misogyny is dangerous because it’s often laughed off, dismissed or made out to not be serious.

Because of that, many women and dfab people suffer in silence. Touching someone’s breasts, pinching their butt or touching someone’s genitalia may not seem like sexual assault to you, but it absolutely is.

The reality of sexual assault is that sexual assault does not require sexual attraction. A sexual assault is not suddenly invalid because the person who committed the assault didn’t get anything sexual out of it.

This is not a conversation that is anti-gay. It’s a conversation that’s simply about acknowledging a blind spot in the conversation about misogyny. Many of these assaults occurred in the context of supporting gay men and socializing with them.

If your reaction to this is “wow, you just hate gay men”, then you need to realize that in this wall of accounts of sexual assault, you decided to prioritize your feelings about gay men over your feelings about women and dfab people who are survivors of sexual assault. The point I’m making is that sexual assault is sexual assault regardless of who commits it. So we cannot absolve gay men of this sexual assault because they didn’t enjoy it or because they were doing it “out of curiosity”. At the end of the day, many women and dfab people are told to laugh it off or not take it as seriously when it’s absolutely just as serious.

I’m currently editing my first video about gay men and misogyny. I wanted to thank all the brave people who came to my inbox and told me their stories. Their identities have been hidden for obvious reasons. I know it was hard, but I want to bring attention to something people are viewing as a small issue that is a lot more widespread than a lot of people seem to realize.