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Saw Lesnar (self.SquaredCircle)

positivefeelings が 投稿

Walking through Minneapolis airport... see Brock walking in the hallway with Sable, lock eyes with Brock Alpha male style, give a head nod, put out my fist, he bumps it, we got on our separate ways.

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トップ新着論争中古い順Q&A

[–]schkibberdProud Kananite 398ポイント399ポイント  (49子コメント)

And then you ran around the corner and marked the fuck out like a small child...?

[–]alpha-k 58ポイント59ポイント  (0子コメント)

The appropriate reaction

[–]Psych0BoyJacki'm the Jew in Jewjitsu 17ポイント18ポイント  (1子コメント)

and then he ran around the airport again, but this time with a fake moustache so he could bump fist him again

[–]WhirlyTwirlyMustacheStand back! There's a tropical depression comin' through! 9ポイント10ポイント  (0子コメント)

I'm going to pretend he did Bo's victory lap around the terminal, with his belly jiggling for all to see.

[–]JERKONfilmsTom Phillips is the future 185ポイント186ポイント  (44子コメント)

Is your hand broken?

[–]Jerry_Colalos mejores del mundo 79ポイント80ポイント  (12子コメント)

Probably. Along with his arm, shoulder, neck, spine, skull, ribs, legs, feet and everything else.

[–]JERKONfilmsTom Phillips is the future 44ポイント45ポイント  (5子コメント)

OP has turned to milk.

[–]dots218*kicks out at 1* 15ポイント16ポイント  (0子コメント)

Which Brock loves just as much as his friend Kurt.

[–]Kaysauce 4ポイント5ポイント  (0子コメント)

A Strawberry Quik-looking concoction referred to by Paul Heyman as "conquered milk"

[–]phyllop23I WISH YOU DIED IN THE WOMB! 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

Only milk can save him now!

[–]bobbythecorkyTOO SWEEEEEEEEEET !!! 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

This post made me mark

[–]ithilkir 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

RIP /u/positivefeelings ??? - 15th July, 2015

[–]rbarton812 13ポイント14ポイント  (0子コメント)

That song we learned in preschool (the shin bone's connected to the knee bone, etc...)... is simply to describe the order in which your bones break when you come in contact w/ Brock Lesnar.

Edit - Words.

[–]richarddhagennluck is for losers 6ポイント7ポイント  (2子コメント)

OP goes home and his car is crushed

[–]whiskeymann 4ポイント5ポイント  (0子コメント)

Next week on Raw / Look for it 30 times

[–]Jerry_Colalos mejores del mundo 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

As well as the house itself.

[–]PointClickDaveYou sawft like spaghetti 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

I pictured that as a Mortal Kombat X-Ray move

[–]tyerkerCM Punk's Burst MRSA Sack 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

And his vomit, blood, and urine.

[–]JD_Blunderbuss 20ポイント21ポイント  (0子コメント)

My hand is broken, all I did was read this post.

[–]Baitdoll#YesMovement 15ポイント16ポイント  (7子コメント)

I have a great story about his hands actually.

He doesn't shake strongly. The dudes hands are gargantuan, massive. When you get to shake hands with him, especially as a young adult, it's like sticking your hand in a wizards sleeve. His hand fully encompasses yours and your forearm. His hands are bigger than big shows but they never sell it. They sold it in ufc though.

I shook his hand and it was the weakest sissy bullshit I ever experienced. I was mad agt first but then you realize it's because if he even barely gripped he'd squeeze the shit right out of you. Literally. All over the place.

[–]AssholeMunchin 14ポイント15ポイント  (0子コメント)

Bah gawd. His handshake... it's limp!

[–]FCeezer 3ポイント4ポイント  (0子コメント)

Also it's an old school wrestlers tradition (don't think it's used much anymore) to shake hands extremely weakly. The idea behind it that I heard was it was a way to show another wrestler that you get it and know how to work safely rather than trying to act macho and trying to outgrip the other person.

[–]xychosisLove your hate 2ポイント3ポイント  (1子コメント)

I imagine if he gripped your hand, your blood flow would stop, and one of your limbs would pop with blood like a tube of toothpaste

[–]KragsHave a nice day 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

It'd just turn your hand into a limp bag of bone-and-blood paste.

[–]sternlookInnovator of the Insidious 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

I (average-size male) slapped hands with Big Show once at a live event in a small town. My loose, opened hand, turned sideways, thumb-to-pinky, fit inside Big Show's PALM. I cannot fathom a hand larger than that.

Trying to imagine Lennox Lewis, Paul Wight, and Brock Lesnar going glove-shopping. I can't. I guess you'd have to custom-order at that point.

[–]TopherRocksBaaaad for business 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

He probably stopped giving real handshakes after ripping someone's arm off.

[–]positivefeelings[S] 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

His fist was huge. He is an incredibly enormous person. He's just fucking wide on all sides with a horse neck.

[–]kierono10Reigns can barely even finish his sentences 44ポイント45ポイント  (19子コメント)

Nah, OP did used to work in Hollywood on the Sony lot. He's met tons of celebs and high profile people. Doesn't phase him. Every one is human and at the end of the day if they're not working they just wanna go about their business. The only person he's ever met that would always be down to chat was Seth Rogan. One of the coolest people he's ever met.

[–]Markioperpe 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

Underrated post.

[–]HotPikachuSexRoddy Piper has AIDS 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

No. A crack traveled through his arm and destroyed his entire body in slow motion like a Mortal Kombat X-Ray move.

[–]P4NK-TPI hate this stupid country 86ポイント87ポイント  (19子コメント)

Did you encounter him in the bathroom afterwards?

[–]CN14Sneaking Across the border 73ポイント74ポイント  (16子コメント)

Even the beast incarnate BAROCK LESSSSSnar needs to poop

[–]CammmJ 61ポイント62ポイント  (10子コメント)

I know this mostly a joke however, something abt Brock Lesnar pooping terrifies me. Like whole house smells like manure for 2-3 days type stuff. Just really bad.

[–]UndertakerBloop 36ポイント37ポイント  (0子コメント)

I bet he goes once a week and it's like the sick Triceratops scene in Jurassic Park.

[–]Natetendo83 27ポイント28ポイント  (2子コメント)

POOPLEX CITY!

[–]longislandicedzI want Zack Ryder inside me 17ポイント18ポイント  (1子コメント)

SUPLEX SHITTY!

[–]AstroZombie95The champ buys the beers 7ポイント8ポイント  (0子コメント)

Is Sean Connery staying there

[–]EkimSretlaw 9ポイント10ポイント  (1子コメント)

Or its always a no wipe poop constantly for lesnar

[–]magpie_armyPeople Power! 5ポイント6ポイント  (0子コメント)

The poo would simply be too scared to cling to his bum hole

[–]retrospectsdo do de dooooo 8ポイント9ポイント  (2子コメント)

He just goes out in his woods and digs a hold.

Edit: haha oops. Whateves

[–]patrick79x 7ポイント8ポイント  (0子コメント)

His shit is so strong that his intestines can't handle it. Hence the diverticulitis.

[–]DragonbornZBudokai3:16 14ポイント15ポイント  (1子コメント)

Paul Heyman has to cut a promo on the toilet before Lesnar enters,

Lesnar enters toilet with heyman with party poppers used as pyro and a boombox playing Lesnars song,

Lesnar does the jump onto ring apron thing but in reverse to the toilet, HERE COMES THE PAIN!

[–]CN14Sneaking Across the border 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

Here comes the pain? Looks like the beast is in need of some laxatives

[–]TheGreatRayPape 4ポイント5ポイント  (0子コメント)

Strangely enough, my shit grunts sound like Paul Heyman yelling BROCK LESNAR.

[–]d13filmsBowling shoe handsome 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

EAT. POOP. WIPE. REPEAT.

[–]RJPennyweatherAnd I'm free, free falling. 3ポイント4ポイント  (0子コメント)

Actually Brock's body is so highly evolved and in tune with itself that he uses all of the meat that he ingests. He literally turns every last big of steak and potatoes into useable energy.

[–]CFGXThe Bella Twins are winning the total airtime?? 7ポイント8ポイント  (1子コメント)

One day, I'll get to this reference first.

One day.

[–]P4NK-TPI hate this stupid country 5ポイント6ポイント  (0子コメント)

But my time is now

[–]Boyd_Loner 48ポイント49ポイント  (0子コメント)

OP is a fucking liar. My friend once locked eyes with Brock and he died on the spot.

[–]womb_raider__What does that hothead want? 67ポイント68ポイント  (8子コメント)

I'd have thrown my bags down like an alpha and said:

"Brock. You're here. I'm here. LETS. DO. THIiiis!"

for those who don't get the reference

[–]sashunderaDEAN FUCKING AMBROSE 30ポイント31ポイント  (4子コメント)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nB_xOLcYTlw

[–]MajorInsane 12ポイント13ポイント  (0子コメント)

This will never be not funny.

[–]dametupata 3ポイント4ポイント  (0子コメント)

The best Bork screams are still the two he did when he walked down the ramp before borking Y2J

[–]Big_TruckEat. Sleep. Reddit. Repeat. 1ポイント2ポイント  (1子コメント)

Oh my God. I can't stop laughing. That was amazing.

[–]sashunderaDEAN FUCKING AMBROSE 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

You should come to WredditStreams 5 minutes before a live show then.

[–]darthgallionIT WAS ME AUSTIN 11ポイント12ポイント  (0子コメント)

dammit who put the question mark on the teleprompter!

[–]Ollimus3 months 13ポイント14ポイント  (0子コメント)

version 2

コメントをもっと表示する (1 返事)

    [–]danielbryanjack 17ポイント18ポイント  (4子コメント)

    I wanna believe this so bad but it sounds too good to be true

    [–]theViKNGwe need something here 19ポイント20ポイント  (2子コメント)

    I'm pretty sure he's just a troll.

    [–]kierono10Reigns can barely even finish his sentences 19ポイント20ポイント  (0子コメント)

    Apparently he's met tonnes of celebrities and meeting them doesn't phase him, but he gets all giddy and excited when one blocks him on twitter.

    コメントをもっと表示する (1 返事)

      [–]kingajeezyI found my smile 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

      Considering I doubt Brock flies commercial and he doesn't live in Minnesota anymore, I really doubt it

      [–]MenteFria 54ポイント55ポイント  (0子コメント)

      Hi! I'm /u/positivefeelings and I'm about to touch Brock Lesnar. Welcome to Jackass!!

      [–]El_Nombre_OccupadoI bless the Reigns down in Africa 12ポイント13ポイント  (4子コメント)

      Did you meet him in the bathroom afterwards and swear you didn't follow him in?

      [–]xzerosleepYou can't break me. 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

      No, but OP did used to work in Hollywood on the Sony lot. He's met tons of celebs and high profile people. Doesn't phase him. Every one is human and at the end of the day if they're not working they just wanna go about their business. The only person he's ever met that would always be down to chat was Seth Rogan. One of the coolest people he's ever met.

      コメントをもっと表示する (3 返事)

        [–]jatorres"..fell flat on his ass...!" 13ポイント14ポイント  (2子コメント)

        Sable still hot?

        [–]quagmire0Dammit this poster has a family! 9ポイント10ポイント  (0子コメント)

        THIS is the most pertinent question in this entire thread.

        [–]Psych0BoyJacki'm the Jew in Jewjitsu 3ポイント4ポイント  (0子コメント)

        Sable was right next to Brock Lesnar... would you even dare to look?

        [–]YMic321Ambrose mark 6ポイント7ポイント  (2子コメント)

        This is about as believable as the Edge bathroom stall story.

        [–]sternlookInnovator of the Insidious 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

        I once passed Edge (out on injury at the time) in a narrow hotel hallway. The biggest detail is his height. He is seriously taller than he looks on TV.

        [–]OrcSoldat 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

        What's this story?

        [–]matto123It's Yersel! 7ポイント8ポイント  (1子コメント)

        The current state of OP's Hand

        [–]msctexWinnersNeverQuietQuietersNeverWin 5ポイント6ポイント  (0子コメント)

        The Brock Eyelock is like the Kimura: once you are in it, it is up to him what happens.

        [–]killerkali87 4ポイント5ポイント  (1子コメント)

        Did you see him F5 an airplane?

        [–]crazzzy_bongoone-on-one with da Undertaker 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

        That's how planes take work, Brock Lesnar F5's them into the next country.

        [–]DragonbornZBudokai3:16 3ポイント4ポイント  (2子コメント)

        What happens if Brock Lesnar walks into an F5 tornado hitting an F5 on a keyboard while pressing F5 on another keyboard?

        [–]chris2webby 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

        the universe explodes

        [–]Whaddaulookinat 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

        He would hoist the tornado across his shoulders and... well you know the rest.

        [–]randyheadlockortonthank you, fuck you, bye! 4ポイント5ポイント  (0子コメント)

        spoiler alert, /u/positivefeelings is actually Paul Heyman

        [–]aNJrewBelloDirtiest Wredditor in the Game 3ポイント4ポイント  (2子コメント)

        How's your fist feel?

        [–]ThatScottishBesterd 4ポイント5ポイント  (1子コメント)

        If OP says anything but "broken", I will not believe him.

        [–]msctexWinnersNeverQuietQuietersNeverWin 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

        That or now he can pound nails with it.

        [–]Dennyboy101 11ポイント12ポイント  (1子コメント)

        Why does this have 72 upvotes? He could be lying? People lie

        [–]Jewrusalem3MB ain't enuff man I need 3.5 4ポイント5ポイント  (0子コメント)

        You lie, man!

        [–]allhailxenuA BROKEN FREAKIN NECK 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

        In this thread OP is J&Js caddy and everyone else is Lesnar

        [–]the6crimson6fucker6it's better to burn out, than to TNA 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

        Now he knows your smell. In the next couple of days you will wake up in the middle of the night, than you look in the darkest corner of the room only to hear the last words you ever will. "Suplex City, bitch."

        [–]etherealcaitiffLGCTYTBWITWYIWBSTTB 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

        Wow, that was a risky move. What if Brock was a little groggy and he saw some random guy move his fist towards him, and he just freaked the fuck out and killed you? Didn't think of that did you?

        [–]Canadia86Nash Internet Defense Force 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

        I saw him once when I was living in Alberta. He was at the Montana's in Medicine Hat, but he was eating so I didn't bother him. I guess he was on a hunting trip. His dinner was two cooked chickens.

        [–]BONGLISH 3ポイント4ポイント  (0子コメント)

        Fucking hell, locking eyes alpha male style?

        Really?

        [–]jamielfc1994kanenite 3ポイント4ポイント  (0子コメント)

        This subreddit has gone down the drain fast

        [–]Hmmmmm__ 10ポイント11ポイント  (9子コメント)

        /r/thathappened

        [–]Fr4tSelf high five! 5ポイント6ポイント  (0子コメント)

        I'm with you here http://i.imgur.com/Y0bn9HD.gif

        [–]cbartholomewFruit Basket Man/wredditevents.com 22ポイント23ポイント  (7子コメント)

        Man, why do people do this? Why cant we be more like /r/MLP and just embrace positivity, trust, and the power of friendship!

        Wait... what the fuck did I just say?

        [–]dardargnanThere's poop on this chair! 22ポイント23ポイント  (1子コメント)

        IT'S A NEW DAY YES IT IS

        [–]cbartholomewFruit Basket Man/wredditevents.com 4ポイント5ポイント  (0子コメント)

        POP

        [–]NotWolfBlitzerBRASS RINGS DAMMIT 5ポイント6ポイント  (0子コメント)

        What the fuck did you just say?!

        [–]jaketessem 3ポイント4ポイント  (0子コメント)

        Friend, ship rocks!

        [–]PGRacer 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

        Hey mister, you take your gay porn and get out of here.

        [–]John_ManhunterCertified G and a Bonafide Stud 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

        Friendship is Magic.

        And so is Brock.

        コメントをもっと表示する (1 返事)

          [–]FartweaverСАЩ пони фенове жалка 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

          A quick rest stop at Suplex City and you're back on your way.

          [–]TrimmersX7"What's that, Mr. Shovel?" 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

          How did you not die instantly?

          [–]galutz 1ポイント2ポイント  (1子コメント)

          how has sable aged?

          [–]wonderlossI'm a Baaaad Man. 4ポイント5ポイント  (0子コメント)

          Like plastic, I would imagine.

          [–]RocheCoachdammit 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

          Thank you for treating him like a human being that has shit to do today.

          [–]JPizzackY NO Lynch flair? 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

          This is EXACTLY how I'd like to meet Brock Lesnar......

          [–]paco_1090 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

          Was he heading to Suplex City to prepare everything to take Rollins to it on Sunday?

          [–]quagmire0Dammit this poster has a family! 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

          Props to you. I locked eyes with Stone Cold once and cowered away like a frightened animal.

          [–]StoneColdSteveAss316 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

          You could've fisted Brock Lesnar or Sable....you chose Brock Lesnar.

          [–]Steel2TitaniumThe Showstopper 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

          The post was a neat anecdote but the thread is gold.

          [–]phemom 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

          I'm glad you didn't die.

          [–]DirtyxD75 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

          You're alive, so this obviously didn't happen.

          [–]TheBrianJSpanish Announce Table Goes First! 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

          "Hello Seth. I want to play a game."

          [–]Islanderfan17 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

          Jealous as fuck, not going to lie. I've met plenty of wrestlers but the thought of meeting Brock Lesnar is badass in only a way that maybe Steve Austin and the Rock can match, even if it's just a fist bump.

          [–]cbartholomewFruit Basket Man/wredditevents.com 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

          So that's how you connect eyes with the man who noticed Asian Kevin Owens...

          He has hunter instincts... Always knows his surroundings.

          The fist bump: connecting Brock Lesnar and the community since 2015.

          [–]GRAHDENS5859 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

          I know this is cool and all but, how is your hand bro?! That had to hurt so bad

          [–]apache18 0ポイント1ポイント  (1子コメント)

          Was he a big dude? Like, I know it's kind of an obvious question...but does he blow you away with his size in real life?

          [–]allofusarelost 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

          Did you see him walk through the streets at BITE? Looked like He was there to fight Godzilla.

          [–]DonkeyKongBundy 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

          I thought for sure this was gonna be a screenplay with Brock Lesnar starring as Jigsaw

          [–]FourCylinder 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

          OP plays the douchey heel quite well.

          [–]KameratypI'm a Cesaro Guy 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

          I actually dreamt, that I was sitting next to Lesnar in a restaurant and he almost killed me several times unintentionally because of his strength. Like giving me a pat on the back that broke my ribs while acting like a lost child in a giants body.... It was terrifying...

          [–]nismotigerwvu 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

          This is the best way to acknowledge celebrities outside of meet and greets. Now obviously if it was Alton Brown you wouldn't do the nod and fist bump, more like a smile and "thanks for all the recipes". You have to remember, these are people too and think of how awkward you'd feel if some stranger came up to you and wouldn't leave you alone. I know it isn't anywhere on the same level, but I present the prelab videos for my university's Chemistry courses and I even get wierd "hey chemistry guy" comments when I'm out and about, I can't possibly imagine how unbearable it could be for someone that is actually well known.

          [–]jaketessem 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

          I used to live across a lake from his lake cabin. I've seen him water-skiing before, but just on his bare feet. No skis involved.

          [–]TolerancEJ 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

          If the OP owns a car, it better be locked-up in a secured garage.

          [–]DrPogo2488Used to Make Meth and Eat Children 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

          That fist is now empowered; be careful. Don't jerk off, you might pull it clean off.

          [–]WhirlyTwirlyMustacheStand back! There's a tropical depression comin' through! 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

          put out my fist, he bumps it, we got on our separate ways

          Way to no-sell, chump. This is why you'll never get a push.

          [–]gordonmansley 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

          Did you get back to your car only to find out that it had been completely destroyed?

          [–]Markioperpe 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

          That's how you interact as a fans people!

          [–]leaction 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

          if anyone is bored, go through this guys comments. name drops constantly. quite hilarious.

          [–]randompaul100/r/bulletclub 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

          The proper way to meet any celeb. They love that they don't have to do another selfie and have to deal with people swarming him after they see that he's famous

          [–]SaintPhoeniix 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

          /r/thathappened

          [–]HermanVelasquezI eat DOG FOOD -4ポイント-3ポイント  (2子コメント)

          That is the most badass thing I have ever heard.

          [–]Joy_Ride25Wreddit's Voice of the Voiceless 1ポイント2ポイント  (1子コメント)

          Get out more.

          [–]HermanVelasquezI eat DOG FOOD 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

          Thanks, I will.

          [–]Alittude -1ポイント0ポイント  (0子コメント)

          haha this is awesome

          [–]ZubatCountry -3ポイント-2ポイント  (0子コメント)

          Everyone who keeps downvoting OP's legitimate comments just because they didn't like his "didn't phase me" one near the top needs to grow up.

          [–]vertical_suplexWHAT? 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

          that's like the perfect Brock Lesnar encounter

          [–]KSOFMKILL OWENS KILL!! -2ポイント-1ポイント  (0子コメント)

          This isn't low effort content but uploading a screen shot from Raw for people to use as a wallpaper is? Hitler Mods.

          [–]El_Invader_Ten -3ポイント-2ポイント  (0子コメント)

          Hero

          [–]pasta_fireTHAT's MY LINE! -3ポイント-2ポイント  (1子コメント)

          That was one of the coolest things I've ever read in my life.

          [–]Jewrusalem3MB ain't enuff man I need 3.5 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

          You've gotta read more, son.

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