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26 year old woman from Ireland posts video about domestic abuse. (youtu.be)

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[–]nicholmikey 36ポイント37ポイント  (2子コメント)

How I feel about all of this wife beating https://youtu.be/uXom0OP3Rwk?t=32

[–]suicidalkatt 3ポイント4ポイント  (0子コメント)

It's funnier because of his name

[–]Ulrich453 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

There are some crazy people and then there is always two sides of the story...who knows https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mIOY2ezMy9A

[–]sico007 21ポイント22ポイント  (8子コメント)

This video might make things temporarily worse but it also serves as documented evidence of the way she was treated. I wish the best for this young lady as she has a rocky road ahead not to mention raising two children on her own.

[–]redditvlli 10ポイント11ポイント  (6子コメント)

Documented evidence would be recording the events actually taking place. This is just her side of a story. Not saying it didn't happen, but the public has been burned many times before on domestic abuse cases.

[–]kidamy 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

I agree. I think she's being really brave in posting this video. I just hope most of reddit is sensitive about this issue, or just doesn't comment if they're not.

As of me writing this, we're at 13 comments and it's already a bit of a shitstorm.

[–]Clawedd 64ポイント65ポイント  (57子コメント)

The kid looks black. Reddit is going to have a field day with this.

[–]OliverDeBoys 38ポイント39ポイント  (44子コメント)

Statistics don't lie.

People say they're misleading only when they have an agenda to discredit or ignore what the statistics are showing.

I love her hastags, though. Strong, independent woman . . . who don't need no man?

[–]Arn_Thor 3ポイント4ポイント  (0子コメント)

uh, Irish statistics don't lie either. Alcoholism and violence go hand in hand. I bet you my bottom dollar that man heads to the pub for a pint too many

[–]jackblack2323 31ポイント32ポイント  (30子コメント)

http://www.americanbar.org/groups/domestic_violence/resources/statistics/Race_Ethnicity_Statisitcs.html

Overall, African Americans were victimized by intimate partners a significantly higher rates than persons of any other race between 1993 and 1998. Black females experienced intimate partner violence at a rate 35% higher than that of white females, and about 22 times the rate of women of other races.

Surely a rate of 22 times higher than other races can't just be a small problem. The political correctness in the world is so bad that i'm scared of being banned for even posting these statistics.

[–]Coldhardt 30ポイント31ポイント  (6子コメント)

This is US-centered study about the US population.

It is not, in any way, shape or form applicable to a woman in Ireland.

Ireland is a place where domestic violence is very, very common nearing 1/3 women suffering from any sort of domestic abuse and 1/11 women from severe physical abuse.

This isn't a skin color issue, it's a cultural issue.

Some of the highest rates of "first world" domestic violence are in white, homogeneous populations like Denmark, Ireland and Scotland -- ie areas where alcohol culture is common.

[–]AtariBigby 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

I respectfully disagree with some of what you're saying. Statistics about domestic violence are very poor and values vary wildly. What constitutes domestic violence can be defined very differently by different countries and cultures. Take for example this study on domestic abuse in the EU.

http://fra.europa.eu/sites/default/files/fra-2014-vaw-survey-main-results-apr14_en.pdf

According to this study women in the Netherlands, Sweden, France and Finland reported having "experienced physical and/or sexual violence by current and/or previous partner" the most. Croatia and Poland had some of the lowest levels of domestic violence. This study also has Ireland with one of the lowest levels of domestic abuse.

What I'm trying to say is that what is classed as domestic violence varies massively from country with perhaps women in richer countries more likely to report domestic violence.

As such country to country and study to study values vary massively

[–]fleckes 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

Black females experienced intimate partner violence at a rate 35% higher than that of white females, and about 22 times the rate of women of other races.

Surely a rate of 22 times higher than other races can't just be a small problem

OK, there's a good chance I don't quite understand this correctly, but to me it reads as if it says more about the incredible low rate of non-black and non-white females (I guess that leaves mostly Asians?) that experience (or at least report to the police) domestic violence.

Black females experience 35% more domestic violence than white females. That's of course quite a bit. But the "22 times more than other races" reads to me like it's about all the other, not-yet-mentioned races so excluding both black and white.

So I think your "Surely a rate of 22 times higher than other races can't just be a small problem" point is misstating the statistic quite a bit if you just want to make a point about domestic violence regarding black women

The major conjecture I'd draw from the statistic you quoted is that Asian women don't seem to go to the American police if they get beaten, or that in Asian households women really do experience domestic violence on a much smaller level compared to white and black households.

Edit: Reading the site you linked a bit further, Asian women actually do seem to be major outliers when it comes to experiencing (or at least reporting) domestic violence:

12.8% of Asian and Pacific Islander women reported experiencing physical assault by an intimate partner at least once during their lifetime; 3.8% reported having been raped. The rate of physical assault was lower than those reported by Whites (21.3%); African-Americans (26.3%); Hispanic, of any race, (21.2%); mixed race (27.0%); and American Indians and Alaskan Natives (30.7%). The low rate for Asian and Pacific Islander women may be attributed to underreporting.

[–]You_Dont_Party 3ポイント4ポイント  (3子コメント)

The political correctness in the world is so bad that i'm scared of being banned for even posting these statistics.

Oh shut up, you're not worried that that will occur. Stop being dramatic.

[–]Penguin_Party12345 2ポイント3ポイント  (2子コメント)

Am mod, get a lot of requests for far less racially bigoted responses to ban people. Fortunately, in /r/agnostic I leave all comments as long as it is to engage in an open, stimulating dialogue. The only time I've had to ban/remove comments is from morale Christian crusaders who DON'T engage as part of the discussion, but just throw insults and tell everyone they are going to hell etc.

[–]You_Dont_Party -3ポイント-2ポイント  (1子コメント)

I don't doubt you get all sorts of ridiculous requests, but even you say you wouldn't ban him for this.

[–]Penguin_Party12345 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

If you are a mod of a sub over (I forget how many people) you are automatically submitted to a mod subreddit. There are some mods out there that would come close to banning stuff like this. They are probably the crazier ones, but still there are major subreddits out there in which this would happen.

[–]imakemorefreshaccoun 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

i'm scared of being banned for even posting these statistics

That's what it feels like to be right. Either get used to it or start following the herd

[–]DuckMoped 3ポイント4ポイント  (10子コメント)

NUMBERS don't lie. people do. if you want to do the proper analysis then control the variables. you will find out that socio-economic factors have a lot more to do with violence than THE FUCKING TAN OF SOMEBODY'S SKIN

[–]OvesGatukok 11ポイント12ポイント  (5子コメント)

This is from Ireland though. The massive inequality in the US don't exist there.

[–]WhateverWasIThinking 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

Ehh, she's from Ballymun one of the most socially deprived areas in the country, and white people beat their partners there too.

[–]Curvatureland 4ポイント5ポイント  (0子コメント)

This is also one video, so trying to draw any form of socio-economic/racial conclusions in ireland based on one video is silly and you'd think that'd be obvious.

[–]reed311 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

According to Pew, Ireland and the UK have more inequality than the USA before taxes. http://www.pewresearch.org/fact-tank/2013/12/19/global-inequality-how-the-u-s-compares/

[–]Desper 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

Are you saying that the skin color or a person inherently makes them more likely to beat women? Have you been to school?

[–]mkultra50000 -1ポイント0ポイント  (0子コメント)

you sure about that sparky?

[–]98198 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

well actually, numbers/statistics can lie and/or be grossly manipulated.

"There are three kinds of lies; lies, damned lies and statistics." -Benjamin Disraeli

[–]colucci 3ポイント4ポイント  (0子コメント)

Question - it's very fashionable to say that X and Y are caused by socio-economic reasons, and not biological reasons. For example, you're not violent because you're black but because your family is poor; you're not great at school because you're asian but because you study all the time; you didn't get the job not because you're a less-qualified woman, but because men discriminate against you. So on and so on.

Is there any scientific backing for any of these claims? I see it thrown around as if it's common knowledge.

[–]reddotownzu -3ポイント-2ポイント  (0子コメント)

Its not the tan of somebody's skin that makes them more prone to violence, nobody ever said that - it is the increased level of testosterone and many other physiological/anatomical factors that lead to an increase in levels of aggression. It just happens that people of African descent have these physiological and anatomical differences. Same way they have certain genes that make them not absorb or react to certain pharmacologic drugs, same way they have genes that make them more predisposed to sickle cell anemia and many other things.

It just skin color is the easiest to observe and name, so that's what people go for. Also, the faster we acknowledge this as society, the faster we can cater to specific racial differences without the dumb assumption that every human being (race, gender, etc etc) is identical to each other.

[–]dont_stop_smee_now -3ポイント-2ポイント  (0子コメント)

Actually even when you take into account socio-economic factors violence still ties into skin colour. And like others said this is in the U.K so that excuse doesn't really fly.

[–]TotesMessenger 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

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[–]Motherlicka 4ポイント5ポイント  (1子コメント)

You literally are the only one who even brought it up.

[–]Clawedd 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

Find me 1 video to a black person committing a crime or someone saying someone black committed a crime on reddit that doesn't have a bunch of redditors making racist remarks? Of course something with 100+ upvotes and comments. I was just talking about past behavior of reddit. Also other people have made racist remarks in this thread already before you posted that comment.

[–]tangoshukudai -1ポイント0ポイント  (0子コメント)

lol.

[–]cjdennis29 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

My sister knows the guy (he works at her old workplace) and he's black.

[–]ThugjitsuMaster -1ポイント0ポイント  (0子コメント)

The youtube race debate happening in the comments section is absolute gold. This guy in particular had me in stitches, everything about it is perfect. His name, the picture, the comment. Not to mention the fact that 31 people liked it.

[–]raabford 5ポイント6ポイント  (0子コメント)

ITT reddit struggles on whether it should completely discount a woman's domestic abuse story or blame it on black people.

[–]Mentioned_Videos 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

Other videos in this thread: Watch Playlist ▶

VIDEO VOTES - COMMENT
Jimmy Carr talks about wife beating on QI 24 - How I feel about all of this wife beating
Bill Burr NO REASON to hit a woman 1 - There are some crazy people and then there is always two sides of the story...who knows

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[–]franzdpz 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

newspaper report with pics of the partner:

http://www.independent.ie/irish-news/brave-emma-murphys-estranged-partner-says-he-is-not-a-violent-person-31361055.html

[–]hey-easynow 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

Its absolutely sickening. Two things I want to weigh in on is that her husband has most certainly heard of this video and what I got was that he knocked up a client and she confronted him at (? his ) gym. So there will be a rebuttal (feign remorse) not for honor, but economics. I'm happy she has family and friends that are supporting her, not assholes that recommend she stay and blah, blah, blah

[–]WildTurkey81 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

Horrible to think off all of the people who have had to suffer domestic abuse in silence and never escaped it. My grandfather was an abusive drinker. My Dad, his 5 brothers and my Nan had to deal with his mental and physical abuse for years, up until my Dad and his brothers were big enough to force him to leave.

My grandfather was well liked amongst his friends, he was talented and charming, women loved him and men respected him. So no one ever believed that he was doing what he was doing until it got to a point where my Dad and Uncles were big enough to make sure everyone knew and to be able to kick him out without him coming back. The police back then werent much good.

My Nan is the most amazing person and when I think about what that person did to her, who she aptly refers to as "Hitler", it makes me sick. And not even to mention my Dad and Uncles, who are the best role models a boy could have for how to grow up as a man. Not a single one of them became the piece of shit that their father unfortunately was.

And that's just one story, amongst the millions and millions of people around us.

[–]trini3333 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

I know the family the husband is a rapper and goes by the name of wifey mc beat tee

[–]filmsaremyjam 3ポイント4ポイント  (1子コメント)

How about it's not right to raise a hand to ANYONE. I feel terrible for this woman and know she's in a lot of pain, physical and emotional, but making this a woman's issue seems weird. No matter what gender you are and who you are dating, if they are abusive you should leave. End of story.

[–]IdleRhymer 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

You're not wrong. I'm a male survivor of domestic abuse. However I have nothing but sympathy for this woman and she is clearly in a very emotional state. She is addressing the abuse as she experienced it.

[–]fuglyflamingo 7ポイント8ポイント  (7子コメント)

Takes bravery and courage to make this video. I just have 1 comment. She said a man has no right at all regardless of size to hit a woman. What is she hits first and hits hard?

[–]TehDarkKnight 11ポイント12ポイント  (1子コメント)

She's probably not thinking about that in the state she is in now. I would hope she would think that when she is safely away from her abuser.

[–]GeneralEvident 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

Indeed. In a perfect world, nobody hits anybody. In a less perfect world, anybody's allowed to hit back, no matter what gender they are. In this world, which is even lesser, the amount of violence toward women is so much greater that I can live with one-sided facts such as "no man should ever hit a woman" being the norm, even though I'll keep my eyes and ears open for those in the opposite situation. We should not be blind to neither the simple or the complicated truths.

[–]Fenixx117 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

Men and women have the same rates of violence against each other but most people don't realize that. Men are just stronger and therefore better at it

[–]i4NDR3W1 -5ポイント-4ポイント  (3子コメント)

What if that women is a dick? Can't I hit her then?

[–]Omena123 1ポイント2ポイント  (2子コメント)

NO. wtf WHY do you even need to ask! Nobody can hit anyone

[–]i4NDR3W1 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

Seems like my sarcasm didn't go down too well... But seriously, I completely agree. I don't see the need to resolve conflict with violence, at all.

[–]bythepowerofgayscull 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

Yeah, but... what if she's, like, really pissing me off tho... Like, reaaally grinding my gears? Can't I hit her then?

[–]TahaI 4ポイント5ポイント  (3子コメント)

I struggle to watch these videos all the way. I never know who's telling the truth and it wouldn't matter cause either way id be pissed off and angry at the world. Id be pissed if the woman is telling the truth, and id be pissed if she lied. Am I the only one that feels like this most of the time?

[–]Profix 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

Don't focus on the individual case, focus on the message - if you are in an abusive relationship, don't accept it, get out. Doesn't matter if you can't make up your mind in this individual case, her message is a good one regardless, as it is a certainty that relationships like the one described do exist.

[–]Mrdrunkenbatman 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

I feel the same.

[–]kalleluuja 3ポイント4ポイント  (3子コメント)

I support her in every way being anti violence. But when she brings up mental torture she walks on a thin ice. I don't want to be shooting from the hip here, but from my experience women can be equally brutal when it comes to mental "torture". We will never know if she abused him mentally or not, as it does not leave bruises. In my experience the problems in relationships are more often than not caused by both participants. Nothing justifies the physical violence, the man is clearly in the wrong here, but don't bring up something you don't have evidence for, as it will backfire(at least in my mind) and undermine your cause.

[–]BelleRed -1ポイント0ポイント  (0子コメント)

Look, either gender is capable of verbal and emotional abuse (and of course physical), but more often than not it is a male who is the perpetrator. However, if those stats ever change, I'll gladly change my tune.

The fact that you're so dismissive over someone's mental anguish is unnerving. There are so many people in abusive relationships that already doubt themselves and their feelings--they don't need that. Any way you can record your feelings at the time (journal, therapist, video, etc.) helps you in the moment and be able to process what you're going through. Therapy is better but it's not affordable for most.

Yes everything is biased, especially these days as you can't tell who's being honest with their story, but I do take issues with your post. Yes she could have antognized him (on purpose or not) but the other party has the ability to choose how they're going to respond. Lashing out verbally or physically is not OK. Screwing with your emotions is not OK.

Unless you record your whole life Truman-style, or start therapy prior to an abusive relationship, you can always find ways to discredit the person dealing with this crap (victim? I dislike that word for abusive situations).

[–]btcforme2 0ポイント1ポイント  (10子コメント)

Nobody knows how she got the black eye. Nobody knows if she is credible. Ridiculous!

[–]obiwancomeboneme 4ポイント5ポイント  (0子コメント)

I never trust these videos. No matter what side posts them. Relationships are complex and people can be crazy sometimes.

[–]FaceReaityBot[S] 0ポイント1ポイント  (5子コメント)

Seems to be related to the domestic abuse that she is describing. And equally you have no reason to doubt her credibility. What is your motivation?

[–]btcforme2 -5ポイント-4ポイント  (4子コメント)

If it is abuse, perhaps describing it to the police might be the next rational step? What if this man is innocent?

[–]FaceReaityBot[S] 1ポイント2ポイント  (2子コメント)

She probably has informed the police. If he is innocent then an unknown man has some people on the internet unjustly being annoyed with him. What of it?

[–]btcforme2 0ポイント1ポイント  (1子コメント)

I could make guesses all day as to what the facts are, so I can start with the only thing I know and that is, that this woman is making massive, life altering accusations against a man in public on youtube. So, " probably " doesn't cut it.

[–]ahhwell 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

The man has not been named, so there are no accusations to speak of.

[–]RadioHitandRun 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

NOPE! lets describe it to the internet!

[–]edditorRay -3ポイント-2ポイント  (0子コメント)

Shhhh, everyone is busy rushing to judgement!

[–]Freezerburn -5ポイント-4ポイント  (0子コメント)

it's true, we don't know the facts so people need to have control before pulling pitchforks.

[–]develop_the 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

what the hell

[–]mm2222 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

RTE will have a field day with this.

[–]nole908 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

We should all beat the fuck out of that asshole. What a great girl, stupid fuck.

[–]SheriffofBanshee 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

Hashtags on a YouTube video...

[–]Treebranch1 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

Dude got her pregnant twice and is cheating on her, probably knocking up the other woman/women too. It's always the scumbags that seem to get the most women and have the most kids.

[–]anotherOnlineCoward 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

good for her for leaving an abuser. people who stay with abusers are weak and should be mocked

[–]kitano_ken 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

What a bitch. Just go to the police, why post online?

[–]RadioHitandRun 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

Your married to a man..who cheats on you, gets another woman pregnant..and then beats the shit out of you....I'd make a comment that well maybe she's scared, still loves him blah blah blah...

BUT YOU MADE A FUCKING YOUTUBE VIDEO ABOUT IT! Clearly you're brave enough to let the world know, then why the fuck are you with this piece of shit!?

[–]La5eR 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

I think /r/clisare needs to be paged on this one. She /could/ rally support for this fellow Irish woman. At least I hope.

[–]vinspiration -2ポイント-1ポイント  (6子コメント)

Umm... isn't she going to be in even more danger now because of this video?

[–]JigglyArmadillo 5ポイント6ポイント  (0子コメント)

He's probably arrested for domestic abuse.

[–]shiner_man -1ポイント0ポイント  (0子コメント)

I can't watch the whole video.

Can we contact the Dublin authorities to get this guy out of the house and to get this girl help?

[–]RobBanana -2ポイント-1ポイント  (0子コメント)

Someone fuck that man with a hot steel rod up his ass! No homo

[–]nerco8080 -3ポイント-2ポイント  (0子コメント)

No matter the case, there is always a better way to pursue justice or revenge than uploading a video or picture to the internet with hastags and a witch hunt request.

There was a picture on the front page yesterday of two fat people in rented mobility scooters. They were being 'called out' for not being handicapped and using their obesity as a mechanism to cut lines and sit in the front row at sporting events. This time it was sitting in front of a child with an actual disability. The child's parents likely did not ask them to move, or do anything to look into their own accusations against these people; they simply posted the picture to the internet and had people all around the world wishing ill on those two women. No one knew the situation other than what was described. If these women were identified, they would be sent death threats by anonymous people and they would be dragged through the dirt emotionally. This is not the way to handle it because the masses produce this wicked and evil rhetoric when you combine group think with anonymity.

The same goes for this video. There are crazy people out there. There are people who have faked abuse to get back at their "assailant." This woman needs to use her camera to document the abuse and turn it into the police. This is much more effective and ethical than video taping a self-interview and a blackeye and posting it to youtube with hastags. The correct verdict will never be found if you leave it to the masses. Especially with a giant lack of information.

[–]trench_welfare -2ポイント-1ポイント  (0子コメント)

She's casually mentions throwing his phone. Unless she has some kind of mental illness, I cannot imagine a situation where phones get thrown without a long heated argument with lots of verbal abuse coming from both sides. Also, she says this wasn't the first time. Which means she knew, walking in to confront him, that he gets physical.

More questions than answers in this video.

[–]hitlerlovejuice -4ポイント-3ポイント  (0子コメント)

Nice make up skill

[–]doubleas21380 -1ポイント0ポイント  (0子コメント)

I hope she can get help.

[–]Proclivities -2ポイント-1ポイント  (0子コメント)

I would really like to hear the other side of this story.

On the bright side, at least she is not making a video about being harassed in public for having mixed-race babies. Not too long ago a white woman could have been ostracized by her neighbors and family for unacceptable breeding practices.

Upside of a down?

[–]yomassa -3ポイント-2ポイント  (0子コメント)

I have the weirdest boner.

[–]icewalker45 -4ポイント-3ポイント  (0子コメント)

why was this posted to reddit?

[–]IamnotHorace -4ポイント-3ポイント  (0子コメント)

There is a newspaper article in which the ex partner denies that he hit her. He admits there was some shoving but denies hitting her or ever splitting her head open.

I am not posting a link as that may be seen as doxxing.

I don't know what happened. I tend to believe more in her version, but there are two different versions of the story.