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We apologize (self.announcements)

ekjp[A] が 投稿x8

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[–]ekjp[S] 1071ポイント1072ポイント  (177子コメント)

Pics or it didn't happen. :)

[–]Zerei 411ポイント412ポイント  (77子コメント)

Well then... pics when I get home I suppose.

[–]IIIISuperDudeIIII 70ポイント71ポイント  (16子コメント)

We're going to hold you to this.

[–]Zerei 110ポイント111ポイント  (12子コメント)

Am I being detained?

[–]IIIISuperDudeIIII 41ポイント42ポイント  (7子コメント)

You are free to go. But we'll be watching you, buddy.

[–]travcurtis 7ポイント8ポイント  (3子コメント)

What!? I fully expect a pic of /u/Zerei eating a shoelace in under 12 hours.

EDIT: Made of pasta.

[–]Zerei 5ポイント6ポイント  (1子コメント)

I'll be already shitting that shoelace in 12hours.

[–]skrenename4147 -1ポイント0ポイント  (0子コメント)

I'd chop the shoelace up before you eat it dude, they can seriously destroy your intestinal tract. There's a reason giving cats rubber bands, hair ties, and shoelaces is very dangerous.

[–]IIIISuperDudeIIII 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

Well, we're only letting him go under the assumption that he will be back, with a pic of him eating his shoelace.

[–]O-2-L 3ポイント4ポイント  (0子コメント)

2hrs ago when I checked the post it was one long thread of joke buzzfeed headlines.

Now some guys got to eat his shoelaces...

Love you internet...

[–]ADHD7 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

*Sounds of pitchforks sharpening in background

[–]PUSClFER 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

Every breath you take, every move you make, every bond you break, every step you take.

We'll be watching you

[–]noafro1991 2ポイント3ポイント  (2子コメント)

You are. You have to entertain us.

[–]Zerei 1ポイント2ポイント  (1子コメント)

Am I being entertaining?

[–]noafro1991 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

Damn it - so close.

"ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED?!?!" ...

[–]StoneRhino 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

You are free to go... eat your shoelace.

[–]Lynchbread 17ポイント18ポイント  (1子コメント)

You do realize that a shoe lace made out of pasta is just a piece of spaghetti?

[–]IIIISuperDudeIIII 3ポイント4ポイント  (0子コメント)

Doesn't matter. Ate shoelace.

[–]whizzer0 -1ポイント0ポイント  (0子コメント)

reddit: the place where you shouldn't make claims you might not be able to carry out, shouldn't talk about things you know nothing about, shouldn't have an unpopular opinion just leave now

[–]CaptainGroin 95ポイント96ポイント  (6子コメント)

WE DIT IT!!

[–]ah64a 16ポイント17ポイント  (7子コメント)

We'll be here waiting...pls deliver op

[–]Zerei 8ポイント9ポイント  (6子コメント)

It will take a few hours. Don't hold your breath. Or do, I don't own you.

[–]SoraXavier 10ポイント11ポイント  (4子コメント)

Years of swimming competitively have prepared me for this exact moment.

[–]Zerei 3ポイント4ポイント  (3子コメント)

Your video could be more interesting than mine. Mind sharing this moment?

[–]SoraXavier 2ポイント3ポイント  (2子コメント)

It's a lot like that episode of friends where Joey holds his breath.

In fact, I'm gonna go watch that now.

[–]Zerei 2ポイント3ポイント  (1子コメント)

I thought you'd go hold your breath. I'm disappointed here, as in being the only one making sacrifices to get what we want!

[–]SoraXavier 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

I'm just adding on to the free rider problem.

[–]superlulz404 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

You better. Or else you will be added to my thread of "OPs that never delivered and always left you wondering"

[–]CrippledOrphans 8ポイント9ポイント  (7子コメント)

IT"S BEEN 12 MINUTES OP! YOU GONNA DELIVER OR WHAT?

[–]Zerei 18ポイント19ポイント  (6子コメント)

You guys are needy. You do realise that a shoelace made out of pasta stuff is just ol' regular spaghetti, right?

[–]ImOkayAtStuff 7ポイント8ポイント  (2子コメント)

if you like flat laces then it is linguini or fettuccini

[–]Zerei 7ポイント8ポイント  (1子コメント)

I have one sneaker, and it has round laces. It will be spaghetti. It is written.

[–]Team_Slacker 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

What happened to the second sneaker? I MUST KNOW!

[–]ebuh 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

Don't underestimate shoelaces made out of pasta, you need to know how to cook them 'al dente'.

[–]chilehead 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

Getting the aglets right on that is the tough part.

[–]Skelevader 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

Regular old spaghetti that has first been laced through the eyelets of a shoe.

[–]getoverit_now 2ポイント3ポイント  (6子コメント)

RemindMe! 1 Day

[–]Zerei 6ポイント7ポイント  (5子コメント)

I promised a shoelace made of pasta down my throat in a few hours. You're gonna miss the "OP delivered" circlejekr if you wait until tomorrow.

[–]HidingFromThoughts 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

RemindMe! 6 hours

[–]getoverit_now 1ポイント2ポイント  (2子コメント)

You know I called a bot... Anyway, I'll be watching this spot!

[–]Zerei 1ポイント2ポイント  (1子コメント)

I know, I've used this bot before. Just letting you know that shits going down much sooner, you don't wanna miss it.

[–]Ezmoneh 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

RemindMe! 3 hours

[–]ArgonNightmare 2ポイント3ポイント  (2子コメント)

This is what we really came to the thread for anyways.

pulls out camper chair and popcorn

RemindMe! 5 hours

[–]Zerei 1ポイント2ポイント  (1子コメント)

You guys are adding too much pression... D:

[–]PounderMcNasty 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

I swear to God if this doesn't happen I'm going to punch you so hard in the dick and/or vagina.

[–]Velharnin 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

Apparently /u/ekjp is just like the rest of us, get rekt by the CEO man

[–]noafro1991 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

You have to deliver now.

[–]O2C 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

This isn't too bad:

  1. Have a new or really clean pair of shoes.
  2. Make some spaghetti.
  3. Lace it through said shoes.
  4. [Optional] Pour sauce on said shoes.
  5. Eat said spaghetti.

[–]urbaneyezcom 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

It's gotta be video. Pics will not suffice. Laces out Finkle!

[–]AmerikanInfidel 1ポイント2ポイント  (1子コメント)

It's been an hour? Are you ok?

[–]Zerei 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

I'm home now. Expect a video in a few minutes.

[–]PenguinOfBoom 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

You dun goofed, nephew.

[–]JJC3125 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

RemindMe! 6 hours

[–]MasterThalpian 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

A shoelace made out of pasta.....

So, just a normal piece of pasta then? Or will you lace it through a shoe like a shoelace?

[–]HouseTully 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

Zerei better deliver...

[–]Jdduncan14 2ポイント3ポイント  (1子コメント)

Right now I want u/ekjp to deliver a lot more than you.

[–]Zerei 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

Well... apparently all you gotta do is ask here. I could send a few pasta shoelaces your way if that helps.

[–]uriman 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

U dun goofed.

[–]RunningWarrior 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

RemindMe! 1 day

[–]ecatsuj 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

well at least she'll give you gold.. well im sure someone will, I aint giving them any more of my cash though..

speaking of which.. what is the point of the custom snoovitar, seriously..

[–]NoaTacro 0ポイント1ポイント  (1子コメント)

Wait so your going to lace a shoe with pasta, Then eat it? Or do you have some sort of pasta lace hybrid abomination in mind?

[–]Zerei 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

Just regular not-laced-to-a-shoe-pasta.

[–]The_Recusant 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

Watch how Charlie Chaplin does it in Gold Rush. Epic. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gY0DOnNK3Wg

[–]JoshOOOWAH 0ポイント1ポイント  (5子コメント)

The good news is you just have to eat pasta, so really this just comes down to finding your cleanest shoe and lacing it up with spaghetti.

[–]Zerei 2ポイント3ポイント  (4子コメント)

The better news is that it doesn't. Where did I say I need to suck it out of a shoe? I just said I'd eat it.

[–]JoshOOOWAH 3ポイント4ポイント  (1子コメント)

Right, but you somehow need to endow it with shoelace properties. Can you really do that by just, like, stating out loud to no one, "This is a shoelace!" like some sort of magic spell?

I mean, I guess you could.

I feel like we've gone off topic.

[–]Zerei 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

Right, but you somehow need to endow it with shoelace properties. Can you really do that by just, like, stating out loud to no one, "This is a shoelace!" like some sort of magic spell?

It will be mine, doesn't that gives me the right to call it whatever I want?

I feel like we've gone off topic.

I thought I had gone off topic when I promised that.

[–]ATM_TSSC 1ポイント2ポイント  (1子コメント)

Well unless you lace it into a shoe it never was a shoelace, it was just a piece of spaghetti...

[–]Zerei -1ポイント0ポイント  (0子コメント)

So when you buy shoelaces on the market you make sure they were used first? Or they might as well just be spaghetti, right?

[–]Williamcg -1ポイント0ポイント  (0子コメント)

Pao right in the kisser

[–]Mischieftess 82ポイント83ポイント  (14子コメント)

Well, it seems you're learning how reddit works now.

[–]Mapleyy 24ポイント25ポイント  (6子コメント)

She's pretty good at it sometimes.

[–]domuseid 12ポイント13ポイント  (5子コメント)

Masterful

[–]mar10wright 9ポイント10ポイント  (4子コメント)

She wants to see someone eat a shoelace made out of pasta, I do too.

[–]AnOnlineHandle 12ポイント13ポイント  (6子コメント)

She's been on here for years and afaik is one of the original founders/investors. She's probably been on here longer than half the kids screaming about how she doesn't even know how to use reddit.

[–]wasmachien 1ポイント2ポイント  (5子コメント)

afaik is one of the original founders

The fuck

[–][削除されました]  (4子コメント)

[deleted]

    [–]wasmachien 0ポイント1ポイント  (3子コメント)

    She joined reddit in 2013 or so. It was founded by two college students.

    [–]kungpaochickens 8ポイント9ポイント  (3子コメント)

    You heard the woman. Give her the pictures.

    [–]Zerei 8ポイント9ポイント  (2子コメント)

    Alright, alright...

    [–][削除されました]  (1子コメント)

    [deleted]

      [–]rottinguy 4ポイント5ポイント  (0子コメント)

      He said a shoelace made out of pasta, all he has to do is string a spaghetti through a shoe.

      [–]buttcomputing 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

      Looks like you answered the second half of the question but not the first half. How sustainable are sidebar ads and gold as sources of income? Is there any plan to include other forms of advertisement, say, sponsored links that appear among the regular links?

      [–]Ryzzer 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

      reply != answer

      Still want pics.

      [–]halfar 13ポイント14ポイント  (1子コメント)

      SENPAI NOTICED US

      (◕O◕✿)

      [–]lula2488 6ポイント7ポイント  (1子コメント)

      Send photo

      [–]BilgeXA 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

      * This comment edited by Pao's Comedy and Memes consultant.

      [–]x75943 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

      People upvoting the chairman?!

      [–]BeakerandBunsen 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

      Lol you're so quirky Ellen.

      [–][削除されました]  (37子コメント)

      [deleted]

        [–]Bifros7 13ポイント14ポイント  (0子コメント)

        She did respond to that question.

        [–]TehPao 3ポイント4ポイント  (7子コメント)

        https://www.reddit.com/r/announcements/comments/3cbo4m/we_apologize/csu3z58

        [–]LiterallyKesha 2ポイント3ポイント  (6子コメント)

        /u/Firesilver might have deleted their comment out of embarrassment. It originally said something along the lines of "You say this instead of answering the question. You are a joke."

        [–]TehPao 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

        That's what I figured.

        [–]Gimbusa 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

        Here's the comment.

        [–]Firesilver 0ポイント1ポイント  (3子コメント)

        The link I clicked didn't show the response, therefore when I saw the answer I deleted the comment because it was no longer relevant.

        [–]LiterallyKesha 0ポイント1ポイント  (2子コメント)

        Right. The fact that you refreshed an admin page repeatedly just to make a snarky comment but couldn't slow down to gain your outrage karma shows your colours. You are a joke.

        [–]Firesilver 0ポイント1ポイント  (1子コメント)

        Dem assumptions. Not sure why you're so upset about this. But hey, whatever.

        [–]LiterallyKesha 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

        You were awfully whiny in your earlier comment and you are actually accusing someone else of being upset. Lol.

        [–]MundiMori 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

        Aww, an upvoted comment! See, people like you fine when you actually act like you're part of the community, not just lording over it...

        [–]kickingpplisfun 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

        So, al-dente linguini will do for that purpose, right?

        [–]TotesMessenger 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

        I'm a bot, bleep, bloop. Someone has linked to this thread from another place on reddit:

        If you follow any of the above links, please respect the rules of reddit and don't vote in the other threads. (Info / Contact)

        [–]japanesetrapeze 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

        I would like you to do something about our nebulous definition of "brigading".

        [–]zebrake2010 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

        Clap....clap...clap.clap.clapclapclapclap

        [–]0nak 0ポイント1ポイント  (1子コメント)

        LOL !!! SHE ONE OF US :DDD xXDD DAE LIKE HER NOW??? DAE? DAE???? ELLEN PAO FOR PRESIDENTO

        [–]FUCK__PLASTIK 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

        Lol at all these idiots eating her shit up

        [–]snopz -1ポイント0ポイント  (0子コメント)

        How do you feel about how a site seemingly full of supposed Ellen Pao haters seem to worship at your feet at the first sign of you giving them some attention?

        [–]EmJay115 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

        Glad to see you have a sense of humor. Honestly, I think communicating with reddit is the only way this will get sorted out. You're on the right track. Just don't screw up again and start fixing things Ellen!

        [–]mrspoogemonstar 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

        Finally, you've hired a publicist who is also a redditor. Kudos on that one.

        [–]Dr_Victor_Friess -2ポイント-1ポイント  (0子コメント)

        Are you on knowyourmeme.com right now trying to find things to say to make it look like you know the internet well?

        [–]sedemon -1ポイント0ポイント  (0子コメント)

        If (ekjp.answers(3)) { Zerei.eat(shoelace); } //No answer one #3 yet

        [–]DavenF12 -1ポイント0ポイント  (0子コメント)

        CHAIRMAN PAO HAS SPOKEN, LISTEN PEASANT

        [–]djnewton123 -2ポイント-1ポイント  (0子コメント)

        Bearing in mind that your title is Interm CEO, will you soon be opening a vacancy for CEO of reddit?

        [–]OBI_WAN_TECHNOBI -2ポイント-1ポイント  (0子コメント)

        You're a good CEO who made mistakes. I firmly believe things will get better from here on out. Thank you for continuing to make an effort.

        [–]shamelessnameless 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

        Pics or it didn't happen. :)

        You really don't want to be opening up that can of shoelaces Ellen

        [–]Solitairee -1ポイント0ポイント  (0子コメント)

        See interacting with us just makes us like you more. We dont bite

        [–]tedcruzsucks -1ポイント0ポイント  (0子コメント)

        OP better deliver on this one.

        [–]kungpaochickens -4ポイント-3ポイント  (0子コメント)

        L O L!