jump to content
my subreddits
more »
want to join? sign in or create an account in seconds|
[-]
use the following search parameters to narrow your results:
subreddit:subreddit
find submissions in "subreddit"
author:username
find submissions by "username"
site:example.com
find submissions from "example.com"
url:text
search for "text" in url
selftext:text
search for "text" in self post contents
self:yes (or self:no)
include (or exclude) self posts
nsfw:yes (or nsfw:no)
include (or exclude) results marked as NSFW
e.g. subreddit:aww site:imgur.com dog
this post was submitted on
132 points (96% upvoted)
shortlink:
reset password

TheRedPill

subscribeunsubscribe116,864 unplugged readers
491 swallowing the red pill now users here now

Welcome to The Red Pill

The Red Pill: Discussion of sexual strategy in a culture increasingly lacking a positive identity for men.

The Rules

Posting and Commenting Rules - Ignorance not an excuse!
Here to troll? Here's a Glossary of Shaming Tactics, try to be creative and avoid these. We know you won't, that's why you're easy to spot.

Navigation

The Official Failsafe for TRP

The Sidebar

New here? Read the following threads and the Theory Reading below. If you've read the rules above, then you know this is required before posting anyway.
Theory Reading

Links

The Red Pill Network

IRC Channel - servercentral.il.us.quakenet.org #theredpill

The Archives

created by pk_atheista community for
No problem. We won't show you that ad again. Why didn't you like it?
Oops! I didn't mean to do this.
You are not a member of this community. Please respect that by not voting.
131
132
133
submitted by Endorsed Contributor - Class of 2015Modified_Hackware
My friend was talking to me recently about how it all feels completely surreal and somewhat out of place that he is now a father. I did the usual thing you would do for your BP friends and suggested he was just a new dad and this was likely normal. There was something in his eyes though at the back that were restless and possibly bordering scared. Was he scared that he was a dad and 'happily married'? No, he is content with the girl for all that matters and loves his Son. What else then was driving these little moments in our conversation where for all his "happiness" his face was clouded in self doubt and questioning...
I don't know man it's just... I did university and got a job and now... This is it? Right? It just happened very quickly...
At age 30 scrolling through facebook I see father after father sat on their sofas playing Call of Duty or some other videogame with their 4 year old Son with all the typical comment trains running underneath...
Where was their rite of passage? What trial or ordeal did they have to endure to begin to raise a family? Nothing. Nothing at all.
What are they going to tell their grandchildren when they are old?
I used to be good at cod and drinking beer.
Great story.
There is a oft quoted passage in Fight Club - you've all heard it.
“We’re the middle children of history, man. No purpose or place. We have no Great War. No Great Depression. Our Great War’s a spiritual war… our Great Depression is our lives. We’ve all been raised on television to believe that one day we’d all be millionaires, and movie gods, and rock stars. But we won’t. And we’re slowly learning that fact. And we’re very, very pissed off.”
It's true, there is no purpose for men in these days except the ones we make for ourselves and between the television telling us what to think and chasing women we have no space or time to address this most important of issues - generationally we're not very pissed off about having no cause, we're wholly apathetic instead.
Since swallowing the pill you've started to lift weights, dress better and approach women, you're concentrating on your career and have learned how to say no. The truth is:
  • You should have always been in shape
  • You should always have been well dressed and care about your appearance
  • You should have always been able to speak to the blonde in the coffee shop
Our generation feel they should be rewarded for just for tidying their room or leaving the house, turning off the video games or going for a walk... Achievement unlocked - go back to sleep.
The discordance I saw inside my friend was "Eating the bread of shame", he was just a taller, fatter version of himself at 9 years old with all the supposed luxury and privilege of a settled life. He had no rites of passage, no trial by ordeal, no cause greater than himself and professionally sat at a place earning a pension that looks increasingly like it won't matter by the time he comes to claim it.
We were warriors by birth, years of brutal exertion, bravery and commitment was the price of feeling entitled to old age in front of the fire and getting fat. Now we are a generation of spiritually and physically fat and old men at age 20 wondering what this nagging feeling at the back of our collective heads is.
You haven't done anything. We haven't done anything. Short of military service or a committed effort to travelling what could you tell your grandchildren that they'd care for? What have you done to deserve being a family elder, someone to listen to, what have you seen or done that was in anyway remarkable?
I ask myself this as much as the community here and find myself lacking. I've never walked a great Dune in the Sahara, climbed a glacial ice wall, been in a bar fight in Dublin or done a line of cocaine off a Tokyo model, chased by a bear or been genuinely fearful for my life.
What will I tell my grandchildren? I lifted weights day to day and earned money, I partied and fucked girls? I was a wealthy ladies man? Is that it? By my own standards I don't deserve to raise children and settle down if that's my story to date.
What will you tell your grandchildren - what will you have done?
all 60 comments
[–]kalstate 67 points68 points69 points  (7 children)
These posts seem to be getting better lately. It's as if TRP is evolving. I love to see this, my brothers... These are the right questions we must be asking ourselves.
[–]Born2Ball 23 points24 points25 points  (6 children)
Yes it really is evolving. It's directed more towards its original intention now more than ever, as the name would apply, of unplugging yourself from the bullshit that society is trying to feed you. It's a source of legit self improvement advice, empowerment, and being the man you deserve to be.
[–]kalstate 9 points10 points11 points  (5 children)
Interesting. I was just looking over my past posts, and realized how cringe-worthy many of my comments were. I am definitely experiencing quantum leaps in my thinking (thanks to TRP, lifting, eating right, meditation, self-improvement, etc..), and it seems to be happening across the subreddit too. We're having fun, folks!
A side-note for people who thought this subreddit was turning to shit a few months ago..Perhaps it was from a wave of incoming freshmen, but we seem to be figuring it out pretty fast.. I recall one senior suggesting that some of the elders need to step up their game--it seems to be working. And as always--thanks to all of you..
[–]PowerfulHTX 3 points4 points5 points  (0 children)
Interesting, I've noticed the same thing in my self-development process as well. From the blogs and books I've read, they all state that self-awareness and improvement is not a linear progression. The further down this path I go, the more I realize this to be true.
It seems every couple weeks or months I'm stumbling upon a new train of thought that opens a door to a whole new avenue of self-reflection and discovery. The problem I'm facing with this is that this process seems to be never-ending and that can sometimes make it exhausting.
[–]RocketManV 0 points1 point2 points  (3 children)
I may be alone in this, but I picked up TRP fairly quickly. The first two weeks all I did was read, and now I can hold frame, place myself in an abundance mentality, and keep in mind I am the prize.
I can only hope this progression has happened just as fast for the rest of my brothers out there.
[–]Born2Ball 0 points1 point2 points  (2 children)
I feel like this is what happens when you skip the anger phase that I hear so much about. Did that happen in your case?
[–]RocketManV 0 points1 point2 points  (1 child)
Must've, I never really got angry. I sort of came right into this out of a TRP-independent monk mode, and I'm younger, so I didn't have too many preconceived notions I was shattering. Plus, I halfway knew I was doing something wrong with girls haha.
When you start to get it, everything just kind of falls into place.
[–]Born2Ball 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
Wow this pretty much describes me. I half way knew what I was doing cause I was getting with a lot of girls, but not the ones I actually really liked. Of course the red pill solved that mystery for me. I was putting off the "I Don't give a fuck" vibe with the girls I didn't care about. Meanwhile, I was developing oneitis for the girls I really cared about, thereby falling into beta mode.
[–]trpmanforlife 32 points33 points34 points  (5 children)
THIS is core TRP philosophy right here. TRP isn't about getting chicks, it's about improving yourself and making yourself the best man possible and going out there and experiencing new and unique things. The work that you produce and your legacy will be remembered after your death, not how many chicks you banged or how much beer you could hold.
[–]VayneWolf 7 points8 points9 points  (0 children)
We'll said. I read TRP not to learn how to pick up women, but to become a real man who knows what he wants and how to get it. Women really are just another minor benefit to being able to take charge of your own life.
[–]wyit -4 points-3 points-2 points  (3 children)
The Red Pill: Discussion of sexual strategy in a culture increasingly lacking a positive identity for men.
pretty sure its about getting chicks through the core principles masculinity and people keep trying to turn it into some religious following.
[–]648262 1 point2 points3 points  (1 child)
More or less all of us unplugged to get chicks. And you get chicks by being the best man you can possibly be. Not pretending, but being.
That path does involve discussing topics such as "what is a good man", "what does a good man do" or other topics that religious people have been talking about for thousands of years.
Some men then deviates from the path by changing the goal of getting chicks to be a good man. Chicks are still there, but no longer the goal.
[–]RPmatrix -1 points0 points1 point  (0 children)
younger bro, I'd choose your words more carefully when posting around here, unless you wan't to be 'mistaken'
just sayin
[–]VayneWolf 8 points9 points10 points  (1 child)
Excellent post. I'm in my early 20s, and I absolutely hate it when people call me a man.
We are not men just because we are male and reach a certain age, a real man is forged though years of hardship and effort to EARN the lifestyle he has worked to achieve.
There are very few real men left in these times, and it's communities like the Red Pill that give me hope that someday we adult males can become real men like our forefathers who lived, fought, and died to bring mankind as far as it's come.
Modern Feminism is an insult to their memory.
[–]2 Endorsed Contributorvengefully_yours 6 points7 points8 points  (1 child)
Those are good questions to ask yourself, what have you done? What accomplishments have you achieved in spite of apparently insurmountable obstacles and impossible odds? What can you do, as in what do you know you're capable of? You know because you've been tested.
Me? Easy. Two wars, a crazy amount of work punctuated by boredom and terror, which on it's own might be enough. The rest of my life outside those five years separated by a decade, has also been a challenge. I've fought my way back from barely being able to walk. Endured a decade of physical abuse. Achieved a rather hard earned career in wrestling both in high school and in the military. I build cars, not just slap parts on something, I take a rusted out bare shell and make it haul ass, handle well, and run like a practically new car. Full frame off restorations and street machine builds, doing 99% of the work required.
I'm a great dad to my daughters despite the shit the state and my ex did to prevent me from being part of their lives. Of everything this is my proudest part, even if there was 12 years I wasn't allowed to be there for them.
You don't have to be impressed, I simply did my jobs, and I have fun with engines rather than computers. If you want to have confidence, you must be tested. Without the tests, the stress, the dangerous opportunities to overcome what forces others to stop, you will not know just how much you can endure. Once you've endured a great hardship and have been tested, everything else seems insignificant and petty. Stress is easy to handle when you've had lots of it.
Heavy lifting builds you, mentally, physically, and emotionally. Hard men are built by hard lives. Soft men have soft lives. If you want to be hard, you have to earn it. So go earn it.
[–]Endorsed Contributor - Class of 2015Modified_Hackware[S] 2 points3 points4 points  (0 children)
I've been familiar with your story for months, maybe bordering years and I actually thought of you specifically and a few others whilst typing this out.
The submissiion hinges not on the economic gains or lack thereof from military service, it's about knowing yourself, having your mettle tested and having your grandkids love talking to grandad cus "he's seen some shit!".
Without sucking you off too bad I know a beer with you would be more enlightening than a beer with a lot of other ECs, theorists, insightful as they are, do not hold a candle to real struggle and experience. Afterall, in theory, theory and practice are the same, in practice; they are not.
[–]TheQuestion78 16 points17 points18 points  (3 children)
I agree with the general sentiment but this is idolized view of history to me.
Most men of the Great Depression fucking died of starvation.
Most men in the World Wars died before they could even raise a family or if they were lucky went home a cripple.
Most of the chivalrous and brave knights of the Middle Ages typically didn't see more than one battle ever in the lives. Most of their time was spent playing nice with lords and oppressing serfs.
Most men throughout all of time simply went through the motions of life. They, like the typical man of today, grew up, learned a trade (got a job), raise a family, and eventually died.
What I am trying to say is our generation isn't at a much more disadvantage as you imply OP. Yes because of the internet and technology most of our days are spent glued to our computers or TVs, but I am sure the men of old spent most of their time on hobbies of little value as well.
All that being said we definitely ought to make the most out of ourselves and break the mold of the "average" male who does nothing but go through the motions.
[–]docbloodmoney 1 point2 points3 points  (0 children)
I'm wondering if the world wars and all those children growing up without fathers was a strong contributor to the mess men find themselves in today. Boys need strong male role models. Has it just been getting worse every generation since then?
[–]RPmatrix 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
IF ONLY more people saw this as you do Questionsbro, nice post ♂
[–]1Yakatonker 16 points17 points18 points  (4 children)
We were warriors by birth, years of brutal exertion, bravery and commitment was the price of feeling entitled to old age in front of the fire and getting fat. Now we are a generation of spiritually and physically fat and old men at age 20 wondering what this nagging feeling at the back of our collective heads is.
You haven't done anything. We haven't done anything. Short of military service or a committed effort to traveling what could you tell your grandchildren that they'd care for? What have you done to deserve being a family elder, someone to listen to, what have you seen or done that was in anyway remarkable?
Military is a grinder for the economically poor and a hardcore incentivizer of slavery which draws in predatory women(military benefits/credits for married service men). Traveling is fun but over rated in a sense of necessity, really most people are incapable of actually analyzing and observing anything of note from such travels and or establishing and expanding their perspectives, at most its only a means to establish social credit in a local environment which lends more to gynocentric capitol.
The so called fat generation is limited by economical factors, women are not economical, Gynocentrism isn't as attractive or as effective as a dopamine dispenser as video games. Women are also not economical because the new distribution of wealth amongst women, but because the mass dive in male participation in the jobs market and the economy of hypergamy makes most men completely unattractive. Video games are a great redistribution of male time and effort, rather then the abuse of women for men who've fallen below the economic belt line for a majority of women. Most guys here are gynocentric and frankly don't give a shit about the macro, "blue pill men" so this often flies over them and they go into conspiracies about socialism, lazy ass millennials, which are all poor excuses(the alpha hampster) for their own information/perspective deficits.
Does it matter what your legacy is, should such a thing even matter? Frankly being realistic you're being what's termed as a romanticist, an idealist. What actually matters most to children is your investment of time in them, that's the most premium item by which a child, grandchild will ever remember you by if you're in a close familial relationship.
[–]Bronze_Bound 7 points8 points9 points  (0 children)
Agree with this. My grandpa fought in WWII and Korean war (he apparently hated guns after Korean war, I think he saw some shit). Don't really give a shit about him doing all that stuff when he was young ; all I remember is that everyday before his cancer got bad he would pick me up from pre-k and ask me about my day and give me a lollipop or mint candy he got from the bank. 12 years or so after he died my grandma gave me his a-2 leather bomber jacket and in one of the pockets were two mint candies. He was a pretty solid guy in my books. RIP
[–]TheWaterTemple 4 points5 points6 points  (0 children)
Traveling is fun but over rated in a sense of necessity, really most people are incapable of actually analyzing and observing anything of note from such travels and or establishing and expanding their perspectives
Traveling is essential to establishing perspectives. Given the odds, we don't live in one of the best places on the planet. The world is filled with great people and places and the most a person can learn from a place is to spend time experiencing the environment. I wouldn't want to waste my time buying a car before looking under the hood.
Most guys here are gynocentric and frankly don't give a shit about the macro, "blue pill men" so this often flies over them and they go into conspiracies about socialism, lazy ass millennials, which are all poor excuses(the alpha hampster) for their own information/perspective deficits.
Very white knight of you comrade. Go now, ride into the darkness on your high horse.
Edit: I agree with you on everything else.
PS fuck off, I don't give a shit.
[–]thedeathofgod 2 points3 points4 points  (0 children)
I have to say I disagree. My most memorable moments with my grandfather is him telling me stories about working on the pipeline in Alaska. I loved hearing about the bar fights and the bears that would bust into the camp. It always made him seem larger than life.
[–]kaspell 3 points4 points5 points  (0 children)
I've often asked myself this question. I'm gonna be 36 in less than a month and I'm just now starting to feel like a man again. It's been a bit of a trip to tell the truth, and when I sit back and get out of my head and look at the things I've done and what I've experienced, I go wow... why do i not feel confident? 'Saving private Ryan, was the first time I remember really asking myself... what makes a life worth living? I remember asking my dad, who is by all measures a great man... he had no answer for me.
 
A bit of background. In my brief time on this earth, I've been on a nationally ranked wrestling team throughout high school in 4A, should have taken state at least twice but didn't. I've run a nuclear power plant on a naval submarine, I've worked as an operator in chemical plants, done ironwork in refineries, been on search and rescue teams (fire/rescue/hazmat). I managed to get an engineering degree from one of California's more prestigious public schools in my 30's and am now working as an engineer for the Gov in a role I really can't talk about. I've seen and been involved with the dark underbelly of society at times in my past, to the point which nothing really ever surprises me anymore, with the exception of people being stand up when I would have banked against it.
 
The thing is, after getting into some near life wrecking legal trouble in my twenties my self esteem got wrecked. I felt more like an adult at 24 than than I did until quite recently when I took stock of what I've actually been a part of as a contributing member of society.
 
As far as I can tell, the true test of a man, boils down to being able to walk away from the things that leave feelings of regret. It's a lot like how I see happiness. If you're happy/content, more than you aren't, you're winning at this life thing. If you go for something and fail, but left it all out on the line... you won. The only real regret is the lesson unlearned or the mistake repeated.
 
I guess the point I want to share is that, in my experience, We (I) can be our harshest critics. The self can be ruthless, we are not objective when it comes to our own place in the scheme of things. Do what feels right, avoid the things that feel like your getting away with something, own your mistakes, treat people with as much kindness as you can muster. These are the things I've found that have helped start to reclaim my own respect and begin feeling like a man again. Woman and relatioships are all secondary or tertiary issues to how you treat and deal with self.
 
Hopefully you got something from this, I'm out of practice soap-boxing, but wanted to share as this topic.... what qualifies the title 'Man' is one that I ponder often and is central to the things I care about.
[–]nosesandsight 2 points3 points4 points  (0 children)
There are thousands of things to do to have stories to tell...
  • Have a threesome
  • Participate in an amateur boxing match
  • Hike the Pacific Coast Trail
  • Do crazy awesome hallucinogens with a Shaman
  • Ride a motorcycle across asia
  • Open a bar or a restaurant
  • Learn to surf in nicouraga
  • Learn to do acrobatics or trapeeze
  • Live in a monastry for a month
  • Play music on the street for money
  • Live out of a truck and travel the country
  • Learn to repair motorcycles or cars or boats
  • Go to a Dance Party on drugs and let loose
There is a fucking awesome gorgeous world out there. With lots of crazy beautiful things to do and see and participate in. You don’t need a war or paramilitary training. You just need a sense of adventure and mischief.
(Thanks for the post... quality writing and thoughts)
[–]Endorsed Contributorvandaalen 2 points3 points4 points  (1 child)
What I did to deserve being called a man? I acted like a man when I was treated like a man by society.
I didn't give up in the moment I was laying in the gutter and was tempted to choose the easy way out and relief myself from the burden of having to stand myself. I fought my way back up. I grabbed myself by my hair and pulled myself out of the shithole I was in.
And I am still fighting every day and I will never give up again. Most other men at my age have given themselves up already. They are dead without knowing it. They are just waiting for their body to follow their mind and for when the time comes to close their eyes forever.
They are trying to lie to themselves, that they are living the life they always wanted, while getting fatter and fatter. They numb themselves with beer and weed to be able to ignore that nagging feeling, that they've built their own prison for themselves and are now unable to escape because of obligations they feel they have and the social pressure they cannot withstand.
[–]RPmatrix 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
And I am still fighting every day and I will never give up again.
As IS The Way, as Vandaalen bro knows!
Most other men at my age have given themselves up already. They are dead without knowing it.
They are just waiting for their body to follow their mind and for when the time comes to close their eyes forever.
They are trying to lie to themselves, that they are living the life they always wanted, while getting fatter and fatter.
They numb themselves with beer and weed to be able to ignore that nagging feeling, that they've built their own prison for themselves and are now unable to escape because of obligations they feel they have and the social pressure they cannot withstand.
Exactly, and IMO it's FUBAR and sad .... and 'we' CAN help them/us and everyone by NOT being 'these guys'
cheers V
RPM
[–]Endorsed Contributor: "The Court Jester"GayLubeOil 6 points7 points8 points  (6 children)
My father had a 200 Kilo barbell in the middle of our small St Petersburg apartment. He sold steroids to bodyguards and helped prostitutes achieve better bodies. That's how he was able to put meat on the table in 1993 post-Soviet economic collapse Russia.
If you want motivation to not be a fat Call Of Duty couch Dad, then think for a moment about your ancestors. The last thing they need to see is a weak bitch especially after all of the shit they've seen in their lifetimes.
[–]redpillbanana 3 points4 points5 points  (2 children)
This is a teaser for the origin story of GLO.
[–]Endorsed Contributor: "The Court Jester"GayLubeOil 3 points4 points5 points  (1 child)
Ok ill tell you my origin story. My father left my mother for another woman. My mom couldn't raise me on her own so she sent me to live with my Grandparents in Siberia. I spent my early childhood with my grandparents and got most of my values from them.
I emmigrated to the U.S with my mother and she married an American man who has New York Democrat values. At first everything was fine but then I started having a classic male power struggle with my step dad at around 13.
The Value system I had adopted from my grandparents was at odds with the values of my stepdad. We had frequent disagreements. At fifteen or sixteen I decided to pack on as much muscle mass as possible as a passive way of discouraging further conflict. I gained fourty pounds of muscle off Sheiko and heavy Russian food. I also made it a point to be better than my step dad in every way possible.
So when you read my writing and see that I am hyper competitive, lift, vehemently oppose progressivism this is probably why. I was an absolute hellspawn to my stepdad who's liberal parenting style was with Russians Dont Surrender.
The moral of the story is don't marry a Russian woman who has a child from a previous marriage to a bodybuilder especially if he spent extensive time with his Soviet Naval Officer grandfather. Not even once.
[–]redpillbanana 1 point2 points3 points  (0 children)
Thanks for the origin story. Damn, that’s a rough childhood. Folks who have had a tough life don’t have much tolerance for whiners.
Somehow I was expecting to hear that your father started shooting you up with tren when you hit puberty.
[–]Tom_The_Human 2 points3 points4 points  (2 children)
Whenever I want a little boost of motivation, I think of the millions of years of hardship my forefathers have had to endure to get me here, and realise I'm pissing on their graves by squandering my time when there's things to be done.
[–]Endorsed Contributor: "The Court Jester"GayLubeOil 3 points4 points5 points  (1 child)
Exactly my Great Grandfather robbed Czarist banks to fund the Bolshevik revolution so I could live in a Communist utopia. Im not going to let him down.
[–]RPmatrix 2 points3 points4 points  (0 children)
lmao! Ah GLO you're a man after my own heart!
My father was a Croation Partisan (who moved to Oz after the war and became a barrister!)
[–]-The-Prestige- 1 point2 points3 points  (1 child)
This is often what I've thought about when I think of getting married, having kids, and being a man. I like to call myself a young man because 1) Duh, I'm still very young (24) and 2) I'm not a grown man yet. I'm a legal adult for all intensive purposes. I go to school, I have a job, a house, and bills to pay, but that is hardly anything that should make me a "man."
It's true, we all have our own personal struggles. I have a pornography addiction I'm overcoming (no pun intended), and working on self-discipline. But everyone has their own vices that they must wrangle and fight with. Getting up and out of bed on time every day hardly makes someone a "man."
I have friends who are fathers, friends who are single, friends going into marriage, and some falling out of relationships. Not one of them I would say is a man, and, as a lot of you probably have friends like this, all of them have varying degrees of alpha/beta traits. But just an alpha male is hardly being a "man."
I think a man is one who can accurately say how he feels on any matter, whether an expert or a novice. I think a man is someone who can keep himself in check, and if he knows he can't, he has people around him who can help with that. I think a man is someone who respects no person more than anyone else. We're all human, and we're all going to die one day anyway. I think a man is someone who will try to make the best out of any situation. A man keeps his emotions and feelings in check so he can accomplish any task he has committed himself too. But how to make oneself a man, that I don't know. But I do believe figuring it out is part of becoming a man.
[–]RPmatrix 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
Good post bro, but,
I think a man is someone who respects no person more than anyone else.
I respectfully disagree, as 'respect' is earned, not 'given away', do you see why I disagree?/
If not,, feel free to ask/pm me if you like
[–]redpillbanana 2 points3 points4 points  (1 child)
Good post in general but I take issue with lines such as the following:
What will you tell your grandchildren - what will you have done?
This is similar to the "Man up" and "Serve your country" sort of talk, which is a way to shame you into being accountable to someone else instead of yourself.
Personally, I don't care whether I'll be able to entertain my grandkids with my stories. I don't live my life just so I can have stories for my grandkids, I live it for myself, and if my grandkids happen to like who I am, then that's a small bonus. It's more likely they'll be playing their XBox 1000 or watching their version of Spongebob or Dragon Ball Z than it is for them to be chatting with their grandfather - it's an unfortunate fact of today's society, and I don't want their parents to force them to spend time with me.
However, if my grandkids happen to see their swole grandfather working out and they happen to get interested in me on their own, then yes, I'll give them all kinds of great RP advice and stories.
IMAO: Don't live life so your parents will be proud of you and brag about you to their friends. Don't live your life so you can impress your kids or grandkids. Don't live life so you'll have plenty of people weeping at your funeral. Don't live life so you'll have great stories to impress others. Live life so you can look in the mirror and be happy with what you see.
[–]enriquex 1 point2 points3 points  (0 children)
Exactly. We have no purpose on this planet. 50-80 years after you die, no one will be alive who remembers you. Might as well be happy.
Then you have the ones who are remembered. They gave themselves a purpose and succeeded.
So, give yourself a purpose and succeed, or be happy. Nothing will be handed to you.
[–]redpillspeeddate 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
Life sometimes gives you the trials that either destroy you or make you stronger. If they make you stronger, I consider that you can proudly call yourself a man.
My wife and my first cousin/best friend both died of sudden brain defects (Anuresym for her, undetected tumor cutting blood flow for him) within 4 weeks of each other. To add extra fuel, wife and I had separated 6 weeks before she died. So heavy shit.
Thankfully I had a great father and mother that gave me the tools to manage putting away both peoples lives and then making myself stronger from it.
I believe if you can handle extreme loss and still make it through the insurance, the legal and the family issues that crop up then you can do anything.
Since this happened I have visited 15 countries, been with 50+ girls from 10+ countries, had 3 different jobs increasing my salary 50% with work that I love and actually now have a proper RPW as an LTR (she's new but she checks all the boxes but I know AWALT) not bad for 3.5 years of hard work.
So my measure of a man is does he control his destiny or does someone else? And if his world crumbles can he rebuild it better?
[–]PowerfulHTX 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
The way our society is set-up now, a man has to choose the road less traveled, the harder route. With all these creature comforts we have available in our modern age, it seems very easy to slide into complacency. It's so easy to go to college, get drunk, take a shit job, eat shit food, sit on the couch everyday, get lost in sitcoms, and next thing you know 40 years have gone by. It's terrifying.
Unfortunately, I don't see many men choosing the tough route that was necessary in the past. My friends and I often joke about the "pussification" of America. It is all to real. It is something that has me greatly worried for the future.
[–]Masonjarteadrinker2 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
I don't ever save anything, but I couldn't help but to save this right here.
[–]TheGreatAuseil 1 point2 points3 points  (0 children)
The answer is blowin' in the wind.
[–]monzzter221 1 point2 points3 points  (0 children)
"That and a pair of testicles"
--the dude
[–]narazz 1 point2 points3 points  (0 children)
sadly just taking some night classes and getting anAS in art at 34 was an accomplishment for me. pretty much my life is a failure but i'm hoping maybe one day i can at least get good at art. :)
btw the military sucks. i couldnt last a month in it. thankfully my knee gave out on me haha.
[–]slippery_people 1 point2 points3 points  (0 children)
What if a demon crept after you into your loneliest loneliness some day or night, and said to you: "This life as you now live it and have lived it, you will have to live once more and innumerable times more; and there will be nothing new in it, but every pain and every joy and every thought and sigh and everything unutterably small or great in your life will have to return to you, all in the same succession and sequence - even this spider and this moonlight between the trees, and even this moment and I myself. The eternal hourglass of existence will ever be turned once more, and you with it, you speck of dust!" - Would you not throw yourself down and gnash your teeth, and curse the demon that so spoke? Or have you once experienced a tremendous moment in which you would answer him: "You are a God, and never did I hear anything so divine!" If that thought acquired power over you as you are, it would transform you, and perhaps crush you; the question with regard to all and everything: "Do you want this once more, and also for innumerable times?" would lie as the heaviest burden upon your activity! Or, how would you have to become favorably inclined to yourself and to life, so as to long for nothing more ardently than for this last eternal sanctioning and sealing?
[–]-Quotidian 1 point2 points3 points  (0 children)
I've experienced that discontent before. It happens whenever I have too much free time and catch up on all the things I let slip. Once I have nothing to do…I get the feeling that I should be out pillaging. If there are any stories I have--not that I plan to have children for a long time yet--they center around standing up for myself, overcoming certain obstacles, and pulling off some crazy shit by the skin of my teeth. But those stories are amusing or entertaining, not inspiring…and barely respectable, in a few cases.
You're right. We need to do more with ourselves. I think most of us need to build up to anything epic, like ice-climbing, but it can be done. Traveling somewhere alone is a great first step. Just like with lifting or approaching, you just need to keep moving forward.
[–]RPmatrix 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
I suddenly became an orphan at 17yo and literally moved from the house I'd grown up in onto the streets
I had NO choice but to "man up" or be fucked over.
that was the start, 30+yrs ago, and I'm still working on it
[–]TheRealMouseRat 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
I've been chased by a bear, chased by a moose, done construction in the mountains, sailed >12 hours competitions in a tiny boat (while constantly hauling water out of the boat to avoid it sinking), benchpressed 220 punds (100kilos), saved people from suicide. I think I have done some "manly" things, and I keep learning and experiencing new things all the time.
But I can always be better. My experience is that when going trips with the guys is a good way of challenging yourself and seeing new things.
[–]through_a_ways 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
Men today tend to be manchildren. It's simply inevitable, and not only a product of our culture, but our lack of true economic hardship as well.
[–]OilyB 0 points1 point2 points  (1 child)
Our purpose imo, is not practical as much as it is more abstract. It has evolved into abstraction. We're not saving lives and killing mammals to protect our families, not building boats and houses with our own hands. Not fighting wars against intruders that endanger our villages. We can work and provide for our families, that's the same as building houses. We can develop peacetime, take it one step further. We can pursue nobility and all the virtues contained in it.
Ours is maybe a spiritual journey, a spiritual mission. Building or developing integrity, truthfulness, being helpful, strength, frustration tolerance, presence of mind, wisdom, insight, knowledge. These are enough to keep a man busy for a lifetime. And throwing our children as far into the future as we can by making them capable people; well rounded adults, is as good a mission as any. (as opposed to just having them survive into adulthood by feeding them and bathing them).
Any thoughts?
[–]Endorsed Contributor - Class of 2015Modified_Hackware[S] 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
My personal issue with this is that I feel telling my grandchildren I had integrity, strength and stood up for what I believed is an incredibly low bar to set. Where does wisdom come from? Experience right? Just because I'm "better" than "most" people doesn't mean I led a life worth leading. Not being instructive here just thinking aloud as it pertains to me.
[–]OilyB 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
I took a detour from a safe banking job to pursue my dream and I'm living it, been living it for 10 years now.
[–]DonBravera -1 points0 points1 point  (1 child)
Why do we want our children and grandchildren to be proud of where they came from?
Why do we give meaning to our lives?
Why do we choose to let our pasts define who we are?
We all agree that death is inevitable(for now), so why do we fight the impossible?
What is it that makes us want to do anything?
[–]RPmatrix 2 points3 points4 points  (0 children)
Do YOU ever want to be 'happy/content?'
That's "why"
[–]TheRealMewt -1 points0 points1 point  (1 child)
As much as I hate to dash your hopes for all of us to have a story to tell to our loved ones when we're old and grey, let's be real here. The days of the rite of passage are over. The same things that you say make people manly like killing bears or conquering physical obstacles are not worth half as much as they were in more ancient eras. We have high powered guns to kill animals for no effort and we have state of the art equipment meant to help modern people reach similar heights akin to those of our ancestors.
You even say military service is a rite of passage. For every guy who gets sent off all over the world, racks up a kill count, and has an unbelievable story to tell, there are over ten more who sit behind a desk and don't amount to jack shit. Hell, I'm an aircraft maintenance in the US Air Force and I found myself in a situation where I could fire off some rounds behind enemy lines - hardly anybody in the Air Force can lay to that claim! The thing is, though, I fired from an aircraft using what essentially amounted to point and click. I think it's an unforgettable experience, but in the end it's not fighting a bear and living to tell about it.
The days of the rite of passage are over. As humans, we've evolved beyond it - not necessarily because we no longer have a need to prove our adulthood, but because the old methods of making a boy a man are simply no longer relevant. Why do we need to send a teenage boy into the woods to fend for himself and if that were done, what modern technology would be at his disposal to make it more of a cakewalk than a boy beginning his journey during the Spartan age? It's impractical and it doesn't really equip the modern boy to face the challenges of modern life.
[–]RPmatrix 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
I respectfully disagree -- it's just the 'rites of passage' have changed according to the times
Today's Hemmingway's probably see NO value in 'big game hunting' for example, it's "too easy" (as you suggest)
BUT, Ernie also didn't have to face the shit many/most of US, DO, of all sorts, and the things which I would consider 'today's Rite's of Passage' are/can be far more sublime, yet NO less 'intimidating' OR 'rewarding' once achieved
Being in The Military is neither here nor there
IMHO "learning, and then applying" various RP ideas can be called a current 'Rite of Passage' --
Swallowing The Pill is not a 'walk in the park',, that's for sure!
[–]cascadecombo -4 points-3 points-2 points  (0 children)
I was born with a penis, and despite my best efforts was able to reach the age of adulthood.
Thusly, and rightfully, making me worthy of the title of "man"
[–]Piroko comment score below threshold-7 points-6 points-5 points  (1 child)
I've been less than a football field away from a tornado (F1 on the fujita scale).
Use of this site constitutes acceptance of our User Agreement and Privacy Policy {Genitive}. © 2015 reddit inc. All rights reserved.
REDDIT and the ALIEN Logo are registered trademarks of reddit inc.
π Rendered by PID 8605 on app-141 at 2015-06-15 07:49:39.372414+00:00 running 5659adf country code: DE.
0%
 
10%
 
20%
 
30%
 
40%
 
50%
 
60%
 
70%
 
80%
 
90%
 
100%