It’s been a weird year for trans people.
Allow me to be more specific: It’s been a heated, daring, tumultuous, graphic, specularizing, aggressive, pointed, contentious, highly fatal, and really, really complicated year for trans people.
Here are a few examples: Kristina Gomez Reinwald, Ty Underwood, Lamia Beard, and many other transwomen of color have been brutally murdered at the hands of lovers, family members, and strangers. Meanwhile, Laverne Cox and Janet Mock have come to fame and exhibited incredible feats of grace, articulation, and poignancy under the gaze of an eager media. Blake Brockington, Leelah Alcorn, Taylor Alesana, and many other transgender youth have committed suicide after enduring endless bullying and systematic brutality. Meanwhile, Jazz Jennings became the new face of Clean & Clear and published a children’s picture book about her life, and teen trans couple Arin Andrews and Katie Hill (best known for “Can You Even Believe They’re Trans?!” types of headlines) wrote and published individual books about their very public relationship and their mutual transitions. Transman Aydian Dowling took a dramatic lead in the Men’s Health cover contest, and newly out Caitlyn Jenner displayed her insta-transition on the cover of Vanity Fair. Meanwhile, trans people without the genetic predisposition/material wealth/desire to transition into cisnormatively beautiful bodies are disproportionately homeless, or sexually exploited, or incarcerated, or dead.
So, to recap: Transwomen are either models of cisnormative beauty, or they’re dead. Trans youth are either models of cisnormative beauty, or they’re dead. Transmen are either models of cisnormative beauty, or they simply don’t exist. This is the landscape for trans media representation in 2015.
I’m not saying 2015 has offered nothing in the way of pride and productivity for trans people. I’m not even saying the events being applauded as progress are totally useless. But interpretations of ‘pride’ and ‘productivity’ for transgender Americans, as exemplified by Media representation in 2015, have left most of us transfolks (particularly the ones desperate for space and resources) still silenced by louder, more privileged, more lucrative, and more entertaining trans narratives.
If nothing else can be said about this weird cultural climate, it has certainly established a whole gaggle of cisgender people claiming to want to be good advocates for transfolks. The problem, of course, is most new “allies” seem to think reposting Caitlyn Jenner’s reveal photo entitles them to a freshly baked ally cookie, and anyone (even transfolks) challenging the ways they think about transfolks sends them into an immediate cis-savior defensiveness downspiral. Thanks to the Media, even cis people calling themselves “allies” still think they know more about trans people than trans people do, and they are more than happy to tell transfolks to shut up when they don’t like what they’re hearing.
I am here to tell you that I have no cookies to offer. If you still want to be an advocate for transgender people, then you may actually care about transgender people. Neat. Read on.
Here is a short list of standards and principles you can integrate into your daily life to be an all around better person, and to do something with your cisgender privilege (beyond asking pronouns and not asking stupid questions, which are also important) in the era of armchair activism.
1. Shut up.
If one more cis person tells me they’re “entitled to their opinion” about this whole Caitlyn Jenner thing, I’m gonna go pre-maturely gray. When trans people are talking about trans things, stop talking and listen. Turn down the volume on your cis privilege and take your sound-cancelling defensiveness headphones off. When a trans person says, “This media story makes me uncomfortable,” you can say, “Do you want to say more about that?” You cannot say, “You’re thinking about this all wrong!” When a trans person says, “I am really frustrated by the way I’m feeling/being treated,” you can say “Is there something I can do to support you?” You cannot say “But imagine how much worse it could be!” The number one best thing you can do as a cis person advocating for trans people is remember that trans people are experts on their own lives, and though we may or may not be open to hearing it, we don’t actually need your opinion.
2. Show up.
As a cisgender person, regardless of your other intersecting identities, you are privileged with spaces and resources that trans people are not afforded. You may or may not be aware of what these privileges are or how they affect your daily life, but I assure you they are there. Depending on where you find yourself in the matrix of oppression and privilege, there are a variety of ways you might use your position to support transgender people. Can you give $1000 to your friend’s surgery fund? Amazing, do that. Can you give $5? Fabulous, do that then. Do you parent or work with kids? Identify gender-positive youth work or parenting practices that allow your young people to make their own choices about gender expression. Do you work in management or administration? Help ensure your space is safer and more accessible for trans folks, like supporting trans-inclusive hiring practices. Going out to dinner with a friend who’s trans? Choose a place they’ll be able to pee. Micro or macro, just do what you can, and don’t be a dick about it.
3. Stop crying.
Despite the many severe trials and tribulations experienced by transgender communities, it ain’t all bad. While I certainly appreciate the support I have received from my family and peers, the “gosh, you’re just so brave” line is more than a little exhausting. We are people capable of all kinds of emotions: bravery and fear, celebration and crisis, love and pain, and plenty in between. Most of us have some people we call family or friends, most of us have some hobbies and interests we enjoy, most of us laugh as much if not more than we cry. Trans people, like disabled people or homeless people or otherwise seemingly “tragic” people, do not exist to be your inspiration porn. Show us your pride in us by letting both our pains and our successes be our own.
4. Remember we walk among you.
Turns out not all trans people are celebrities (even if we are in our own heads). In fact, despite our transitions, most of us have incredibly boring lives. I won’t say we’re no different from cisgender people, as that’s certainly not the case. But we do drive the same streets as you, and go to the same schools as you, and shop in the same stores as you. If there are trans people in your life, remember we are more than our gender identities. If you are in public, remember there’s probably a trans person within earshot. Remember we are real people with real lives and real needs, working at jobs and living in homes if we’re so privileged, and we need real, honest, authentic advocates to support us in the parts of survival that feel hard. And we also probably don’t want to talk to you about Caitlyn Jenner anymore.
5. Get your information about trans people from trans people.
That doesn’t mean open season on questions about trans politics for any trans person you encounter. Being a trans person who studies and writes gender theory, I am usually somewhere on the happy-to-okay scale about having these conversations with people, but not all trans people live in that sort of headspace. There are an abundance of transfolk writers, scholars, and activists that continuously publish work on any and all aspects of transgender identity, and they are certainly less likely to include/reproduce icky rhetorical errors and factual inaccuracies than cis people writing on the same things. Plus, reading a narrative that a trans person has published with the intent of being read is a much less invasive way of absorbing information than prodding your token trans acquaintance for answers. Some texts are certainly more academic than others, and those can prove difficult to access intellectually if you are not familiar with gender/social theory fields. If you’re new to this whole thing, start with a few gentle reads: Transgender Liberation: Beyond Pink or Blue by Leslie Feinberg, Whipping Girl by Julia Serano, and Redefining Realness by Janet Mock are all excellent places to start. Just read a book, goddammit.
That’s it. That’s all I got. You take it from here.
Just to add to the mix.
https://anonnymouse65.wordpress.com/
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Reblogged this on #ButYallDont_HearMe.
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Thanks a lot of :)
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Thank you so much for the helpful and crystal clear suggestions! Will definitely take note of all this. More power to you!
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I really like point number 5. And it doesn’t just apply to trans people but to all marginalized groups. Often times somebody will say something and I ask “Oh where did you get that info?” And I am met with a blank stare or an “It’s just a fact, I don’t know where I heard it.” The way we keep groups of people oppressed is by spouting misinformation about them. So make sure if you say something about a specific group of people that you heard that info from a member of that group. Nice piece, thanks!
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Bravo
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> Shut up. If one more cis person tells me they’re “entitled to their opinion” about this whole Caitlyn Jenner thing, I’m gonna go pre-maturely gray. When trans people are talking about trans things, stop talking and listen.
Are you aware that by claiming you have the right (as a transperson) to tell non-trans people to shut up you are literally claiming to have the very thing you accuse them of (privilege)?
Do you find the following remark offensive?….. “Shut up. When non-trans people are talking about non-trans things, stop talking and listen”. ….. If you do find that offensive, doesn’t that make you a hypocrite?
> Turn down the volume on your cis privilege
The freedom to have and express an opinion is not a privilege, or a cis privilege, or a white male privilege, or an able bodied heteronormal gender binary conforming white cis male privilege ………. it is simply a human right.
> When a trans person says, “This media story makes me uncomfortable,” you *can* say, “Do you want to say more about that?” You *cannot* say, “You’re thinking about this all wrong!”
So you are literally asserting your right to tell other human beings what they can or cannot think, believe and express as their opinion. And in this politically correct culture we now have, hardly anybody will call you out for trying to limit another group’s right to free speech/ free thought based purely on their gender. Yet at the same time you accuse them of having privilege, while implying you have less privilege when it comes to freedom of expression. Sorry, but that makes no sense. If a non-trans person behaved like you are behaving now and claimed their right to limit YOUR free speech/ free thought based on your status as a ‘transperson’ I’m sure you would claim oppression (and you’d be correct) and society would back you up. So here is a case of a human right that you enjoy (free speech/ free thought), which you say non-trans are somehow not entitled to. Yet you are defining them as privileged, and not you…?
Or to put it another way, when we live in a society where the PERCEPTION of having privilege means being less entitled to free speech/ free thought, then whichever group in society is PERCEIVED as privileged is actually LESS privileged. And that would put cis, white, heteronormal, gender binary male men at the bottom of the hierarchy… which is what we find. They work the most hours, in the most demanding and dangerous jobs (they account for 95% of workplace deaths), they pay the most taxes and receive the least amount of welfare. They have the highest suicide rates, and are the most likely to suffer violent crimes and they receive longer prison sentences for the same crimes than any other demographic. They are society’s mules……and scapegoats!
Also, I’d like to point out that a lot of transpeople do NOT regard ‘trans’ as their identity, but rather as their circumstance – or perhaps predicament is a better word. They identify as male of female, and NOT as trans. So unlike you, they naturally view all males/ females as equals to themselves with respect to the right to voice an opinion, because they do not consider themselves a separate demographic to others with the same gender as them, but rather part of the same demographic, who happen to have been born into a different circumstance/ predicament (just as women born into rainforest tribes and women born in NYC both identify as ‘women’ – but in different circumstances/ predicaments).
> As a cisgender person, regardless of your other intersecting identities, you are privileged with spaces and resources that trans people are not afforded.
Again, the opposite is the truth. We now find gyms and even bike shops are now starting to EXCLUDE non-transpeople, and recently a conference on ethnic and gender diversity in the University of London BARRED ENTRY to white males. You couldn’t make it up!
“Safe spaces” is fast becoming a euphemism for SEGREGATION. And just like in the past, the excuse being given for it is that “it is in everybody’s best interests”.
I gave three recent examples of segregation against non-trans people/ cis men … now I ask you to give one example of a business or institution that has a ‘no trans’ policy. Ready, steady, go….
> While I certainly appreciate the support I have received from my family and peers, the “gosh, you’re just so brave” line is more than a little exhausting. We are people capable of all kinds of emotions: bravery and fear, celebration and crisis, love and pain, and plenty in between.
This contradicts Point 1 where you expressed distress at having to listen to the opinion of a non-trans person. Are you ‘brave’ enough to endure opinions that might not match your own.. or not? Are you ‘brave’ enough to endure the discomfort (often as a result of the extra special treatment and care shown) of being the ‘odd one out’ in a gym or bike shop …. or not? You can’t complain that the mere opinions of other human beings hurts your feelz and that they must ‘shut up’, and then demand to be treated as brave. Sorry but that’s not how the real world works….. that’s called ‘demanding special treatment’ or simply ‘demanding privilege’ based on your status as trans.
Men buying flowers or home furnishings or attending weight watchers might occasionally feel like the odd ones out, which can be uncomfortable, and they might on occasion have to endure quizzical looks from women. Should these men also demand ‘safe spaces’ like some in the trans community are now doing? Or is finding oneself, on occasion, in a minority just a natural part of everyday life – especially if you happen to belong to a minority demographic such as the ‘trans community’?
Do you think ‘safe spaces’ and other forms of ‘special treatment’ might actually help to INCREASE the feeling of exclusion, isolation, ‘otherness’ and of not belonging to society? ….. as well as increase the sense that you cannot cope with being trans and being in a minority?
> But we do drive the same streets as you, and go to the same schools as you, and shop in the same stores as you. If there are trans people in your life, remember we are more than our gender identities.
So given that men, women, redheads, gays, trans, cat lovers, jugglers, submissives, astronauts and fat people are all united in being PEOPLE, is it safe to assume you agree that forced segregation is a step in the wrong direction?
Are non-trans people also more than just their gender identities? If so, why do you claim in Point 1 that their opinion is not welcome? You seem to be saying trans/ non-trans people are all just ‘people’ one moment, and the next you are dictating who can say or do what based on whether they are trans or non-trans. Are you aware that you are exhibiting what’s known as ‘double think’?
> And we also probably don’t want to talk to you about Caitlyn Jenner anymore.
But whose fault is it that everyone is sick to death of her already?
A) Non trans people for being subjected to articles about Caitlyn Jenner 24/7 in the media for the last few weeks?
B) Caitlyn Jenner, for being such an unashamed media whore, and cashing in on her condition by selling her transition for money and making a profound and difficult life journey look kind of like some tacky and superficial lifestyle choice?
No wait, let me guess….. It’s cis white able bodied heteronormal males who are at fault right? They strike again with their oppression! LOL
> That doesn’t mean open season on questions about trans politics for any trans person you encounter.
You are defining trans politics as if it only affects trans people. To me ‘trans politics’ would be the politics operating WITHIN the trans community. That is distinct from gender politics (or just ‘politics’) which affects everyone. As I have already pointed out non-trans people are increasingly finding themselves barred from the free market for the ‘crime’ of being born in the wrong gender. Therefore the subject of transgenderism is as much THEIR ISSUE as it is yours. If being barred from society based on gender doesn’t earn them a place on the roundtable of gender discussion, I don’t know what would.
Did you know that the way you and other trans people behave in society also affects everyone else in society. To fail to understand this is called narcissism.
It is entirely reasonable that non trans people would want to discuss and talk about these issues, just like you. But I suspect if they behaved like you and started telling transpeople when they could and could not broach the subject you would find that offensive. And if they held meetings barred transpeople from them you would also find that offensive.
The point is gender belongs to everyone, and not just the ‘trans community’.
> There are an abundance of transfolk writers, scholars, and activists that continuously publish work on any and all aspects of transgender identity, and they are certainly less likely to include/reproduce icky rhetorical errors and factual inaccuracies than cis people writing on the same things.
Again, what they are really talking about is GENDER identity, and not just transgender identity, which would be how transgendered people identify within the demographic of the transgendered ‘community’. Non trans people also have their own gender and a gender identity which is just as valid and real. Transgendered people do not have a monopoly on discussions of gender, although increasingly they behave like they do.
> Plus, reading a narrative that a trans person has published with the intent of being read is a much less invasive way of absorbing information than prodding your token trans acquaintance for answers.
Non-trans people also have genders and gender identities, because all humans have them, and they also find the subject can be difficult – or just inconvenient – to talk about. Approaching any human and talking to them about their gender is potentially invasive, but at the same time we are all adults and part of being an adult is being able to cope with ‘grown up’ conversations about ‘grown up’ issues at appropriate moments. Again, this is not an issue which only affects to trans people.
Respect and courtesy is a two way street.
Having your thoughts, opinions and discussions about gender issues micromanaged by a complete stranger displaying narcissistic tendencies on the internet can also be felt as ‘invasive’ and offensive….. as can being barred from a shop or meeting open to the public for the crime of being born into the ‘wrong’ gender.
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Ah, yes. The old Derailing for Dummies playbook. http://www.derailingfordummies.com
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You sound nervous, honey. I think maybe it’s because it’s starting to dawn on you that you’ve got a lot of growth & change to look forward to. Because, for the rest of your life, THIS is the direction society is moving in, and those good old days of unchecked privilege to remain oblivious to these issues are never, ever, ever coming back.
Move forward. :) The twentieth century was awesome for white dudes, but it’s over now.
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the author doesn’t want change. the author wants to preserve his right to whine and moan and dictate to others how to feel. you see… positive change would get in the way of all those privileges. there’d be no more fun dictatorial editorials for us ignie “cis”sors.
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> You sound nervous, honey.
Well obviously. I just showed three examples of blatant and unapologetic discrimination / segregation based on gender and race that have recently occurred in our supposedly progressive society. Of course that makes me nervous! Doesn’t it make you nervous?
Obviously, I get what you are insinuating (and that makes me twice as nervous), but I really want you to say it out loud in a public forum – if you dare. So I ask you: In your opinion are there any specific genders or races that you think it’s OK to discriminate against and segregate from the rest of society? If so please name which ones they are?
If not then we agree after all (if only in public, in your case).
> The twentieth century was awesome for white dudes, but it’s over now.
OK, that’s your claim. I am now going to test your claim by reversing the genders. If you are right, women will now seem like the privileged gender, instead of men. Are you ready? Let’s do it.
During the twentieth century women were forced to go to war for the state – to kill others, and be probably killed themselves – in return for the right to ‘vote’. Meanwhile, men were divided on whether or not to demand this same right to vote because a lot of men didn’t really want to be forced to go and fight wars along with all the women soldiers. As a result many men vehemently opposed men’s suffrage and wrote pleading letters to the newspapers of the day opposing it. But in the end a group of ‘radical’ and ‘passionate’ (ie violent and thuggish) men committed acts of domestic terrorism, which are still celebrated to this day, such as trying to pin a banner on the King’s horse during a horserace, which could have easily caused multiple human and horse fatalities (as it turned out the terrorist died and the poor woman rider whose horse trampled him was so traumatised by the event she eventually took her own life).
So anyway, thanks to terrorist acts like these, men were quickly granted the right to vote WITHOUT any obligations at all. This male privilege was granted to men by an all female parliament, who understood that society would never tolerate sending men to war zones! This new male privilege meant men were able to vote for wars, and then have women as young as 18 forced to fight them on their behalf. And if any of these young women refused to fight they were put in a cage, or if they refused to fight while on the battlefield they were simply shot. And that is how millions of women (as young as 18) were slaughtered throughout the 20th century in various wars, which the men did not have to fight. Not only did men do nothing to stop this (and a 5 million man protest in London or Washington surely would have had some effect), but some men actually gave women pacifists a white flower as a symbol of shame and social disapproval. And even to this day men still are quite open about finding the sight of a woman dressed in the costume of a state hired assassin to be a big turn on. Men routinely pay to watch women dressed as killers perform strip tease acts on stage, and glorifying (and let’s face it, objectifying) females as robotic killing machines has always been major part of men’s romance novels and romantic movies for the last century.
Women also did the majority of the manual labour and other dangerous and gruelling jobs for the last century (and the last 5000 years), which they still do to this day, which is why 95% of workplace deaths today are women. And women pay the MOST taxes, but receive the LEAST amount of benefits from those taxes because the majority of tax money is spent on men. Women were expected to provide financially for their husbands, and even today a man who financially supports his wife is a rare thing, with most women contributing the majority of household income – although men control 80% of it. This combination of financial support from the state and from their wives, allows most men the luxury of being able to choose careers that pay more in terms of job satisfaction, flexibility, reduced hours, a pleasant workplace environment and a job in line with their own interests or hobbies. The fact of the matter is that men can AFFORD to choose lower paying jobs – but which pay more in non-financial ways – because they get more financial support from women, both directly (wives/ GFs) and indirectly (taxes). Even today plenty of men can afford to not work at all and just be househusbands, which is perfectly socially acceptable. But if a woman lives as a housewife who is financially supported by her husband she is looked down upon as a parasite and a bit of a loser. But this rarely happens because most men demand their wives or GFs earn at least as much – if not more – than they do.
The rape of a woman was only legally recognised as a ‘thing’ in the US in the last decade, whereas rape laws have protected men going back to the 10th century at least. Even male slaves had laws which protected them – but never female slaves. And in the latest CDC rape study the forced envelopment of a man is defined as rape, whereas forced penetration of a woman is NOT defined as rape. This skews the statistics and results in the public perception that women are rarely raped, when the actual figures show women are raped almost as much as men. Girls are more likely to be severely sexually assaulted (ie penetrated) than boys. And in the same study women suffer nearly three times as much domestic violence from men, than men suffer from women. But there are still virtually no shelters or charities for women, but thousands for men. If a man hits a woman on the street he is likely to be cheered by passers by ….. but if a woman hits a man on the street she will likely be tackled by a passer by, restrained, the police called and she will be arrested, even if it was all in self defence.
Women are forced to work longer than men before retiring, even though women die sooner. Women have no reproductive rights, whereas men have full reproductive rights. Divorce laws and custody laws favour men over women. Women are sentenced more harshly than men for the exact same crimes. And while it is against the law to mutilate a baby boy’s genitals it is still legal in most western countries to mutilate a baby girls genitals.
And lastly, and perhaps most tellingly of all, advocating for men’s issues and men’s rights is openly championed in society, whereas anybody (male or female) advocating for women’s issues or women’s rights is swiftly attacked, demonised and socially ostracised. The very idea of ‘women’s rights’ or ‘women’s issues’ is treated as a joke, as are women themselves. Kick a man in the nuts – that’s violent assault. Kick a woman in the ovaries and that’s hilarious ha ha :) This perfectly illustrates women’s role in society.
OK. We’ll stop there. Now that we have reversed the genders, which gender has just enjoyed an ‘awesome’ century, full of privilege? Men or women?
> and those good old days of unchecked privilege to remain oblivious to these issues are never, ever, ever coming back. Move forward
Ah yes ‘forward’ is your declared destination! That ‘blank scrabble piece’ of a destination favoured throughout history by psychopathic rulers and generals leading their populations or armies into slavery, tyranny, cultural oblivion and social collapse.
Forward = Don’t ask where, just follow me!
Here’s an alternative idea. How about we move towards a society that respects ALL manifestations of gender, race, sexual orientation and lifestyle?
Would you agree to support that …. or would you prefer to class certain genders/ races/ orientations and lifestyles as inherently inferior and therefore not deserving of basic human rights? If that’s your stance, at least have the guts to say it out loud.
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“4. It Is Not Reverse Transphobia
The attempt to turn the cis argument around so that cis people are the victims and trans people are the oppressors is an abuse tactic against trans people.”
Courtesy http://everydayfeminism.com/2015/01/being-called-cis-is-not-oppressive/
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^— what a bunch of hokum. look, this isn’t war ok? you want it to be war because it would make your lives oh so much more meaningful, but i hate to say it, there isn’t a war here, and trans people are not special, so find meaning in your life by some other means. nobody is special. do trans people want equality, or do they simply want to overturn the current situation such that trans people get to dictate society’s opinions on gender and whatnot? do trans people want the oppression to stop or do they simply want to be the oppressors themselves based on feelings of vengeance?
no disrespect, but we’re merely exposing the author’s hypocrisy. be the change you want to see. if the author doesn’t want to be treated like a dick, then perhaps he shouldn’t go so far as to elicit these reactions with his reaction-eliciting commentary. that’s a dick move, if i say so myself.
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yes, yes, and yes. i couldn’t have put it better myself curiosa. a very logical, methodical means of showing the author’s weak points.
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Thank you for this perfect illustration of exactly what cis people should not be, and providing excellent evidence
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Thank you for this perfect illustration of exactly what cis people should not be, and outlining exactly the sort of bullshit people have to live with.
Gender is everyone’s? No, everyone has gender. But only trans people get told that their gender is wrong, that’s it’s sinful, that it’s dirty or simply that they are mistaken about their gender.
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> Gender is everyone’s? No, everyone has gender. But only trans people get told that their gender is wrong, that’s it’s sinful, that it’s dirty or simply that they are mistaken about their gender.
Hello May, please read my comment again. I gave *specific examples* where non-trans people were recently barred entry to public spaces/ public gatherings based solely on their (apparently) ‘wrong’ gender.
I am suggesting we treat all genders and all gender identities and expressions equally by affording them all basic human rights.
Apparently this is a controversial and even an offensive stance…..
And it hardly needs saying, but feminist theory (patriarchy theory) claims males have systematically oppressed females throughout history, and some branches of feminism even claim the oppression of women is an *inherent* aspect of maleness,….. you know, just like how another group once said that black people were *inherently* savages or thieves or rapists.
So if that isn’t an example of a large and influential group claiming a cis-gender is ‘wrong’ I don’t know what is.
Also, not all trans people identify as ‘trans’ (as if trans were an actual gender). A lot of trans people identify as male or female. The treatment of ‘trans’ as if it were a gender (or a non gender) in its own right is a relatively new phenomenon.
My point being if a trans person identifies as male or female then the insistence on segregating society into ‘trans’ and ‘cis’ actually prevents them from fully integrating as they would like to, and expressing (and enjoying!) their natural gender.
And finally, I think it’s fair to say the majority of hate/ ridicule/ persecution directed at trans people is directed at MtF’s – and specifically those who cannot ‘pass’ as female very well due to size, bone structure and so on. In general they are attacked not because they identify as female, but because they are perceived as male. There is a difference. After all, cis-women are not usually attacked for identifying as female are they?
Therefore it is really an attack on a male, and not on a female or a ‘trans’, because the target of any act of persecution is always defined by who the persecutor THINKS he or she is attacking (in this case a male in a dress, to put it bluntly)
For example, if you put dog poo through the letterbox of an elderly lady, but you meant to put it through the letterbox of your ex boyfriend who lives next door (it was dark and you were drunk) then it is not really fair for anyone to accuse you of being anti-old ladies, is it?
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Yep, nervous.
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No but like actually, shut up.
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“Inspiration porn”—–well said!
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I am against everyone… When it pertains to carving thy self a graven image…
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right? like could you suffer loudly enough? it’ll help drown out the rest of the world’s suffering.
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My self-esteem leads me to believe…. A gay man is so infatuated with the woman species he couldn’t appreciate himself how could he love someone else?
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Wait ? So you’re not happy being you? You’re gonna build a new who? God doesn’t make mistakes you do….
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You pious folks like to judge everyone and then claim it’s not you. It’s God. Pretty convenient. There is no God. You’re living a lie. It’s just you and your fear and hate.
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Your comments almost make me understand how a trans person could become so angry and bitter as to write a piece like this in the first place.
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You presume we care. I wish my life were so breezy and trouble-free that I had the capacity to take instructions from a condescending transgender. And what is Cis? Is that common knowledge? What an ego.
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This article offends me, seriously, I felt offended after reading, even if I’m obviously not cis. I wonder how cis person would feel about it but probably it wouldn’t be nice to him/her.
Dear activists, please, please when you say that you demand something from others, or suggest what others should do, talk for yourself not for all transpeople and for all community. It would be a lot better and make much more good work than aligning all of us into some kind of views or needs.
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thanks for writing that. as a well-intentioned cis, and an imperfect being, this blog made me inclined to group trans people all into one category and be defensive. that’s what shitty writing will do. however, that’s never the case. here is an author telling people to whom he cannot relate (cis) how to feel, all the while purporting that he is the spokesperson for the sentiments of the trans community. the whole blog reads like a dictatorial editorial.
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Personally I find this whole thing exhausting, don’t label me anything because its annoying and stupid. Why do we even need labels anyway? Do we really need them to establish our identity as living beings on our planet? It just seems like another way for everyone to separate into different casts and be put into “groups”
Everyone should be allowed the same human rights, I don’t really care what you identify as.
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Such a fine collection of sockpuppets!
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Reblogged this on drquacky.
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Reblogged this on anxiousobsession.
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Reblogged this on PUQUIN WORLD.
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I would have taken all of these rules as common courtesy but I’m glad someone took the time to spell them out- common courtesy isn’t so common these days.
Was fascinated to learn that ‘cis-gender’ is official terminology though, makes sense!
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Reblogged this on GoodOleWoody's Blog and Website.
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Reblogged this on Aussiedlerbetreuung und Behinderten – Fragen.
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You coudnt say anything better than it 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
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Reblogged this on liathegreater.
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Can anyone explain me difference between cis and trans people
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See above.
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Outstanding. Thank You. I hope You Celebrate You. And I hope Everyone In Your Life Celebrates You For Being You. Many Blessings
Rebecca : Positive Thoughts Positive Life 4 Everyone
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Reblogged this on mrktingmix and commented:
Love it!
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Theforgottenonesblog.com
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Reblogged this on Alana Wynne.
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Thanks for the great post :) It’s awesome to see this dialogue building.
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Just so you know- original blogger – if you continue to talk like this to people who are not trans and who are not familiar with trans issues – you will continue to antagonize people. If you are not open to hear or discuss any ideas or opinions or questions other than those totally accepted within the trans community, then you are living in an echo chamber and have stopped critical thinking processes. You may miss some valuable conversations. If your ideas and positions are strong they should be able to withstand open discussion. When you are not willing to engage in a discussion or address points made but instead just deride the person who tried to engage with you, the progress you claim to desire, cannot occur.
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I don’t care about others like me but ..
FROM ME
TO you and LGBT community….
LOVE and RESPECT.
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Amazing. Perfect. My step daughter is trans teenager. As we watch the news and see stories of other trans teens committing suicide, her father and I count ourselves lucky that our families have been so supportive. The world she lives in is not the world we live in, and it is so sad that her exsistance is a cause for debate. People have this ignorant idea that if it doesn’t involve them directly then they shouldn’t be concerned with it. How many centuries do we have to listen to the same privledged group say the same tired line before there is a change. I am proud of her because of the wonderful person she is, and her success in life, as I am proud of all of our children. We support all of our children expressing and living a lifestyle that is true to them. That is what life is about.
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Reblogged this on The Adventures of a Pissed Off Millennial and commented:
A great read about what cisgender people can do for transgender people.
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