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submitted by Endorsed ContributorOmLaLa
Dear RPers,
This will be a multi-part article across the span of a few weeks. They will each cover a different topic, but are all built around a central theme. I hope you all enjoy this one.
I will have sex with a woman for the first time today at 5:00.
I will meet up with a stripper for the second time today at 6:30.
I will have sex with another woman for the first time at 9:30.
I will have sex with a third woman for the first time tomorrow at 8:00.
I’ve increased my productivity at work three-fold. I’ve maxed out my bench twice. I’ve cold approached 3 attractive women within the past 48 hours, have their numbers, and am effectively working them into plates. I just hit on Clair from McDonald’s (I needed a cheap lunch today) and she brought me my food with her number crudely scribbled down on a napkin. I told Wendy from my boxing group that she had nice tits and she told me she’s always wanted to try anal.
This afternoon, I told Crystal that if she behaved well she’d get a doggie treat and told Makayla that the only way I’d drive to her county is if she blew me upon arrival. Saturday, I made my fine china (favorite plate) drive 45 minutes to watch me and my three best friends throw $1s on a set of strippers we went to high school with. I secretly fingered her under a crowded bar while grabbing some well-endowed stripper’s tits (black strip clubs let you touch the strippers, who knew). On Sunday, I made out with a stripper-gone Christian that my friend’s been pining over for months (sorry Kevin).
Half of you will say I’m full of shit. Half of you will say I have god-like super-powers. Half of you will say it’s all due to frame or attractiveness or height or status or that I DGAF.
The truth of the matter is I’m just really, really horny.
I’ve gone the past 2-3 weeks with no sex and no masturbation and I have very high libido. Just as TRP advises you to use your anger and fear to your advantage, your horniness are can be just (if not more) effective.
In these articles I will discuss how complacency inhibits the full utilization of your libido, how porn and idealization come into play, why I’d advise you to stop masturbating over limited masturbation and how to use your over-charged libido to fuel your cold approach.
Brace yourselves, gentlemen.
JACKING OFF TO GirlsGoneWild™ COMMERCIALS AT 1 AM
In order to build a good framework around this subject and to make this article a bit more personal, I’d like to take a minute and talk to you all about my extremely awkward and ill-informed sexual adolescence.
In my sexually-charged youth, my father never gave me what you might call a real “sex talk”. We went to go see a movie one evening, he turned off the radio and it went a little something like this:
“OmLaLa, mah’ boy, sex…well, sex is nice. It’s real nice. Son… it’s fuckin’ great. Like, damn… damn son. But, eh… you gotta… you gotta wrap that shit b’fore you tap that shit, you know? Or you’ll get stuck. Stuck wit’ kids an’ a crazy ass woman. You want kids, son?”
“No, Dad.”
“Do you want a crazy ass woman, son?”
“Uhh, I don’t think so.”
“That’s mah boy. Yah can’t jus’ go around fuck’n every Sarah n’ Sally, son. I rememb’r this one chick from college…”
And then he went on for the next 20 minutes talking about the crazy women he’d banged in college. Do this day, it’s one of the more memorable “talks” my father has given (he really sucked at lectures, but he’s a good dad all-in-all).
My school was no better; they decided teaching abstinence over sex ed was more politically correct, so we sat in a classroom of guys for an hour each day while our awkward gym teacher lectured us on not doing things without telling us what they were.
“Don’t do anal or oral. 'S still sex and c’n give yah diseases.”
Shows picture of diseased penis
Classroom loses its fucking shit
“Teacher, uh.. what’s anal and oral?”
“Don’t worry about it, kid. Jus’ don’ fuggin’ do it, alrigh’?”
“Yes sir.”
“Now who wants’ta see what HPV c'n do to’a grown man’s scrotum?”
Class loses its fucking shit again
And so, I had but one place to learn from: the internet.
During my adolescence, my family possessed this wondrous and archaic form of primitive web browsing called “dial-up” internet (for you younger readers, this was before DSL. For you even younger readers, this was before Wi-Fi). It would take anywhere from 10 to 25 minutes just to load up one website (no lie). I started with pictures (which defined for me what WonderTits™ is supposed to look like), but when we finally got DSL installed I upgraded to videos.
Going in, I knew little to nothing about sex (outside what you hear around the lunch table, but they didn’t know either). I remember watching my first videos thinking, “so this is what I’m supposed to do with girls”. I was pretty sheltered. I remember losing my virginity with some chick from the softball team in some electrical janitorial closet in my school’s cafeteria thinking the sex would be just as intense and charged as it was in those videos.
It wasn’t; we switched positions every 30 seconds, the condoms kept drying up, she kept drying up, we were scared for our lives someone would come in, and I knew nothing about the anatomy of the vagina, so I kept trying to bend her in unrealistic ways.
And I’m sure a lot of you RPers reading this have some stories similar to mine.
In today’s digital age, many of us (and many men around the world) were taught about sex from porn or pornographic material due to the weak or non-existent sex education in schools (teaching abstinence is not the same as teaching sexual education) and a lack of “sex talks” from our parents.
What makes matters worse, we’re constantly pressured to do “it” without ever being properly told what “it” is or how or how long or is this right or does this feel good or is it too small or does that hurt or why is she bleeding or its too dry.
We are all taught by porn. And porn is a lousy fucking teacher.
GIANNA MICHAELS AND SASHA GREY WERE YOUR SEX ED TEACHERS
Porn has does two things to our subconscious: it sets our sexual standards and causes sexual complacency.
The complacency issue I’ve covered previously in Dopamine; porn is a business that profits from how turned on it makes you and how many times you come back for more (like candy or Mcdonald’s or a video game). This is a dopamine addiction that causes complacency which in turn limits you from actively pursuing sexual release from other places (i.e. actual sex).
What I’d like to discuss further is how porn has effected your expectations of sex and women subconsciously. I’ll explain:
In the past, if you’re being honest with yourselves, I’d assume at some point in your lives you’ve thought that the WonderTits™ in the yoga pants over there working out on the elliptical wanted to drag you into the nearest broom closet an bang your pretty brains out just because she gave you an extra second of eye contact.
Now why did you think that? Has that ever happened to you before? Sure, your friend Brad says it happens to him all the time, but have you ever seen it happen? No? Well, then where did you get such a livid imagery from?
Or maybe you’ve seen WonderTits™ in Bi-Lo buying a loaf of WonderBread™ and you suddenly thought that if you went over there and bent her over the dairy section she’d willingly allow it and onlookers would cheer you onward to climax.
Well now, that just sounds like rape. But it didn’t look like rape in your head. It looked awesome in your head. You’d cum on her face and everyone would cheer and it’d be great. Right?
Maybe, you’ve tried something you’ve thought you’ve always wanted to do. You had sex in a crowded movie theatre while watching The Avengers because you’ve always had a thing for exhibitionism. But in reality, positioning her was a nightmare, she was too dry to quickly slip into, the whole time you were terrified of getting caught, your $40 jeans are now covered with soda and butter stains, she was getting too loud so you had to stop be for climaxing, and you’ve missed a third of a movie you were dying to see.
But this was your fantasy, right? It was supposed to be this wild, sexually-charged thing. Why was it awkward? Why was it more difficult than you’d imagined?
There is oft a disconnect between what you want sexually and what you think you want sexually. Again, porn is designed to be as visually stimulating as possible. That’s why folks that frequent porn develop such strange and unexplainable porn fetishes (you know EXACTLY what I'm talking about. Be honest with yourself here).
Because many of us were brought up by porn, we are subconsciously conditioned to learn and adapt our sexuality to porn. In turn, we develop “fetishes” we think we want based on our viewing habits (I watch a lot of bondage porn so I must love BDSM) that aren’t true to our real sexual desires. Porn fetishes and kinks, although in some cases correlated, are never the same thing.
In short, just because you’ve suddenly started watching a bunch of Asian porn that doesn’t mean you’ve now got yellow fever.
Kinks or “real fetishes” are psychologically constructed from a number of outside factors. “Porn fetishes” are simply that; strictly restricted to porn. The mistake is made when we lose the ability to differentiate the two.
Porn has the same influence for your expectations for horny women. We believe, subconsciously, that a woman who really wants to sleep with us will approach us and behave in the manner we’ve seen in porn. This is because for most of us received more insight on sex from porn than the actual act itself (I know I’ve watched more porn than times I’ve had sex, had I’m willing to bet you have too).
As an example, let’s say you’re watching a YouTube video to learn how to drive a stick shift instead of actively attempting to drive stick shift.
Okay, so you may be better prepared than if you’d be if you just jumped in and started pulling levers and mashing pedals. Fine. Great. But you’ll finish that video with some preconceived notion of what driving a stick will be like without taking into account that the business that made the video feeds off your views, the guy teaching in the video is not you, the car he’s driving isn’t the one you’ll be driving, he’s a professional and being paid to teach you, you’ll probably choke the first time you try, the video probably never brought up the difficulty of hills, the clutch point is different in every car, there’ll be no one there to hold your hand for the real thing and if you wreck due to the video’s misinformation it’ll all on you and your insurance and not on the video. Now imagine how much simpler all that’d be if you had your dad or an driving instructor guide you through driving a stick beforehand instead of watching that video.
Let that sink in for a second.
In Part 2, we’ll go into masturbation abstinence and how to channel it to benefit other facets of your life. Until then, RPers.
all 19 comments
[–]JumpXVI 3 points4 points5 points  (1 child)
We believe, subconsciously, that a woman who really wants to sleep with us will approach us and behave in the manner we’ve seen in porn.
I have a hard time reconciling this. Most hardcore these days doesn't even have a plot, it focuses on the chick stripping or whatever then the dude comes out of nowhere and she starts blowing him.
Any actual attraction, comfort or seduction (the stuff you need to establish to bang any woman you're not paying for sex) that comes before sex in any remotely realistic situation is glaringly absent in most hardcore porn.
[–]Endorsed ContributorOmLaLa[S] 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
It's more of a notion that we expect every girl we have sex with to jump our bones in the manner portrayed in porn and become disappointed when it doesn't happen.
The truth of the matter is they probably would do so should they see us as the Alphas we aim to become.
[–]BrunoOh 4 points5 points6 points  (2 children)
I've been porn free for a couple of months now and it has done wonders for my libido and how more attractive women appear to me. I'd recommend it for everyone.
[–]Endorsed ContributorOmLaLa[S] 1 point2 points3 points  (0 children)
It's all about perception. If you get of to highly attractive women daily (digital or otherwise), your idea of what's "attractive" will be very skewed.
[–]JumpXVI 3 points4 points5 points  (0 children)
Porn has does two things to our subconscious: it sets our sexual standards and causes sexual complacency.
I believe this is the tl;dr for the lazy here, and it's a marvelously intriguing idea. NoFap and hard rebooting are tried-and-true methods, of course, but you posted this in TRP for a reason.
I would love for you to expand upon how, if at all, porn could be used to actually set realistic sexual expectations (rather than just no porn ever), as this could be more beneficial than just quitting porn altogether.
[–]omegashakaz 2 points3 points4 points  (2 children)
What if i like where i am, masturbation has no shame like when i was young, i know what gets me off, and then i do other things till i need to get off again, i have time and money because im not using them for getting a girl so the method of op is more for people that need motivation or want to fuck real girls.
[–]Endorsed ContributorOmLaLa[S] 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
Yes, you are correct. This is an active pursuit methid.
[–]nodiggity9721 1 point2 points3 points  (2 children)
I have never seen porn in my life. Hand to god. I don't know why, I can't explain it. That might be the reason I have a very hard time relating to fetishes. People ask "what's your weird fetish?", well umm, sex I guess?
[–]1redpillbanana 5 points6 points7 points  (1 child)
Scientists at the University of Montreal launched a search for men who had never looked at pornography - but couldn't find any.
[–]Endorsed ContributorOmLaLa[S] 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
That makes nodiggity a very rare specimen.
[–]FrameWalker 1 point2 points3 points  (1 child)
Just curious, why a 2 week break after your online binge? BTW your "what are you looking for opener has been helpful"
[–]Endorsed ContributorOmLaLa[S] 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
Towards the end of that article I explained how I'd grown a disdain and a slight to sex. I abstained for personal reasons and to build back my enjoyment of sexual encounters.
[–]NeoreactionSafe 1 point2 points3 points  (1 child)
In most porn the acting and plot are really poor.
What would be interesting is to show actual subtle cues of two people getting turned on by each other so that you can see how things really happen. (with closeups of facial expressions, body language, etc)
If there was such a thing as "great acting porn" which maybe was even intertwined with a real plot it would be interesting.
50 Shades of Gray seems to have been designed to showcase a specific fetish, but not all of us are into that.
A good seduction porn flick with great acting.... hmmmmmm...
[–]Endorsed ContributorOmLaLa[S] 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
I agree whole heartedly, although I fear that in a capitalist economy, so thing that niche wouldn't sell well.
[–]bebestman 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
I struggle with going abstinent. Once I went abstinent for almost two weeks but it didn't do much for me then, now I am unable to keep abstinent for more than a day.
[–]antariusz -5 points-4 points-3 points  (1 child)
Looks like nofap is leaking.
I've had sex in a movie theater several times... Not once was the girl dry. Gotten blowjobs in the parking lot in my car afterward to help finish. Same with the closet. Shit, usually in a cramped space has been the hottest sex I've had.
If your girl is dry it's because YOU are awkward, and her emotions will mirror yours. She's dry because you're not really that good. You're not fucking her hard enough, or she shit-tests you in the middle of sex... And you fail. My current LTR likes to do that actually, that's my cue to cover her mouth with my hand to get her to shut up and fuck her harder.
Women get wet for alphas, they dry up for betas, and "reward" them with sex in a public place for being "a good boy". An alpha gets sex wherever he happens to be. So think about that the next time you're in a movie theater, is she rewarding you because you bought her ticket? Is she just trying to relive her own teenage fantasy of when the football player she used to date in high school fingered her in the theater?
If you want to abstain from porn, do so because your schedule is too full because you're working too hard to bang actual women.
Don't think that abstaining from porn will lead to more women, correlation is not causation.
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