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FWD: If evolution is true... (i.imgur.com)

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[–]platinumarksHAVE U HERD ABOUT BENGAZI 2DAY?! 196ポイント197ポイント  (16子コメント)

Except this image isn't accurate, Grandma. It's not that we evolved directly from other monkeys currently living today, it's that we had a common ancestor (now extinct) that both modern monkeys/apes and humans evolved from. So in that sense, the image makes no sense, because there isn't millions of that common ancestor around.

[–]scumpile 121ポイント122ポイント  (5子コメント)

MAH GRANDPA WERENT NO MONKEY EITHER, YEW AINT MAKIN SANSE

[–]migsantos001 18ポイント19ポイント  (3子コメント)

Reminds me of that Louis CK joke where he asks if you're just gonna keep going back in time until you find a monkey ancestor.

[–]King_of_AvalonJESUS IS LORD 8ポイント9ポイント  (2子コメント)

"Did you read the thing? It doesn't seem like you read... it didn't happen in 1972..."

[–]Guyote_That's A Fact, Jack 4ポイント5ポイント  (1子コメント)

Every time I watch this clip, I cant help but laugh at his impersonation of the human freezing.

[–]outadoc 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

He's pretty good at representing my inner hatred.

[–]pranceswitwerewolves 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

Reading this hurt a bit

[–]yaosioGuns don't kill people, Obama does. 56ポイント57ポイント  (2子コメント)

UNDER GOD UNDER GOD UNDER GOD UNDER GOD UNDER GOD UNDER GOD UNDER GOD UNDER GOD UNDER GOD UNDER GOD UNDER GOD UNDER GOD UNDER GOD UNDER GOD UNDER DOG UNDER GOD UNDER GOD UNDER GOD UNDER GOD UNDER GOD UNDER GOD UNDER GOD UNDER GOD UNDER GOD UNDER GOD UNDER GOD UNDER GOD UNDER GOD UNDER GOD UNDER GOD

[–]Gohanson 2ポイント3ポイント  (1子コメント)

Weerd Science?

[–]Bull3tM0nk3yI'll take "Racist eMails" for $200, Alex. 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

Plastic tubes and pots and pans.

[–]Dispro 11ポイント12ポイント  (1子コメント)

We don't have a lot of extant ancestors, but we sure have a lot of evidence that they (and non-ancestral proto-humans) existed in various forms. If they went extinct, well, that might have something to do with changing climatic conditions (all humans are descended from just a couple thousand ice age survivors, as I recall) and it may have something to do with fights over land or resources (one theory of Neanderthal extinction is that we hunted them for food - and they wouldn't be the only species that primitive man extinguished, either).

[–]monkeydog808 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

Wow is that just speculation or is there actual evidence of homo sapiens eating Neanderthals?

[–]maslowk 3ポイント4ポイント  (0子コメント)

Congrats, you passed high school biology! A pity grandma had to miss it :/

[–]leiner63 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

It's possible that the image (not text) is accurate. The ape on the left is a common ancestor, not a monkey. Grandma just doesn't understand the difference.

[–]turkey_berzerky 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

That's what they're missing: the "going extinct" part. For some reason, the person making this image didn't think of that.

[–]BadTRAFFIC 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

How convenient! /s

[–]Beef_Nuggets 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

It's a valid argument if it were true. It seems like a common misconception people have.

[–]Ferdofreason 66ポイント67ポイント  (6子コメント)

If god made man from dust .. .. why is there still dust?

[–]StewMcgoo 8ポイント9ポイント  (2子コメント)

It's all the people returning to dust!

[–]kekkyman 12ポイント13ポイント  (1子コメント)

There's more people now, but the Earth is the same size. We've violated the law of conservation of dust.

[–]RenaKunisakiis that long distance internet? 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

God has no time for your silly physics.

[–]Deodorant_Dan 6ポイント7ポイント  (0子コメント)

https://media2.giphy.com/media/7TLbuvvqfB2py/200_s.gif

[–]anu26Faux News Foreva!! 4ポイント5ポイント  (1子コメント)

Ashes to ashes, funk to funky

We know Major Tom's a junkie

[–]AdzyBoyTHE BIBLE SAYS IT I BELIEVE IT THAT SETTLES IT!!1 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

Strung out in heavens high
Hitting an all-time low

[–]GenericPCUser 310ポイント311ポイント  (30子コメント)

If children come from parents then why are there still parents?

[–]Volpethrope 57ポイント58ポイント  (5子コメント)

The exact comparison to show how silly the argument is would be "if we came from our cousins, why do we still have cousins?" It points out that the premise of the question itself is incorrect.

[–]GenericPCUser 5ポイント6ポイント  (4子コメント)

Why is that? We don't share a common cousin with primates, we share a common ancestor, or a parent. A great great great great great great great great... etc- set of grand parents.

[–]kekkyman 30ポイント31ポイント  (2子コメント)

They are assuming the ancestor on the left is a modern primate, hence the "Millions of these".

[–]GenericPCUser 13ポイント14ポイント  (1子コメント)

Yes, but they're... wrong.

[–]AdzyBoyTHE BIBLE SAYS IT I BELIEVE IT THAT SETTLES IT!!1 20ポイント21ポイント  (0子コメント)

Exactly.

[–]Volpethrope 4ポイント5ポイント  (0子コメント)

I suppose you can use "sibling," but you share a grandparent with cousins as well. I know we don't share a common cousin with primates - that's the point. The fallacy argument people try to us is "If we came from monkeys, where are there still monkeys?" As long as you change the terminology to illustrate that we're on the same "level" as monkeys, you can make the argument look properly absurd.

[–]sirgraemecrackershare this or you want kittens to die 112ポイント113ポイント  (7子コメント)

Go home Jaden, you're Jaden.

[–]cadrpearVIA THE COMICAL CONSERVATIVE 45ポイント46ポイント  (1子コメント)

How Can They Be Jaden If I Am Jaden

[–]sirgraemecrackershare this or you want kittens to die 8ポイント9ポイント  (0子コメント)

Everyone On Reddit Is Jaden Except Jaden?

[–]Strawberry_Poptart 10ポイント11ポイント  (2子コメント)

He Deleted His Twitter. :(

[–]SleevepupObama=GOAT Socalist Muslim 9ポイント10ポイント  (1子コメント)

where were you when @officialjaden was kill

[–]Strawberry_Poptart 8ポイント9ポイント  (0子コメント)

My eyes aren't real. Idk.

[–]regeya 4ポイント5ポイント  (0子コメント)

That's So Jaden.

[–]SleevepupObama=GOAT Socalist Muslim 3ポイント4ポイント  (0子コメント)

How Can Parents Be Real If Our Children Are Real

[–]turkey_berzerky 15ポイント16ポイント  (1子コメント)

Wrong argument. They aren't saying "why are there still monkeys?" but "why aren't there transitional species?" The simplest answer is that they went extinct. (Or, y'know, space aliens.)

[–]no-fun-at-parties 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

If you quiz the type of person who would be forwarding something like this, I guarantee you 9 times out of 10 they'll actually be asking "why are there still monkeys".

[–]unaspirateur 39ポイント40ポイント  (1子コメント)

actually, grandma, the evolution of the species looks more like this.
Maybe that will help you understand more clearly.
xoxo. see you at reunion.

[–]Wraithguy 7ポイント8ポイント  (0子コメント)

Is it sad that I recognised that exact picture from my biology teacher's slideshow. I guess it's just the best one on the top of google images.

[–]PkKirby876If Obama's our answer, how stupid was the question?!? 27ポイント28ポイント  (0子コメント)

Just another strike against evolution, and it was called out for strike three long ago! SUPPORT JEBUS!!!

[–]PsandysdadWind is caused by trees sneezing 14ポイント15ポイント  (2子コメント)

The meme echoes a common mistake anti-evolutionists make. The theory does NOT say 'humans are descended from apes', as this meme clearly implies.

Humans and chimpanzees are both descended from a common ancestor.

The two lineages split long ago. Chimpanzees in no way preceded humans on this planet, again as the meme erroneously implies.

[–]the_rabbit_of_power 6ポイント7ポイント  (0子コメント)

Wait so you're telling me humans and chimps both evolved, one species evolving is silly enough.

[–]utopianfiat 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

"life is a copiously branching bush, continually pruned by the grim reaper of extinction, not a ladder of predictable progress."

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/March_of_Progress#Criticism

[–]general_gk 55ポイント56ポイント  (6子コメント)

I cringe when I remember I used to think this way back when I was a young Christian. I quoted this exact thing to many people, smugly thinking I had trumped evolution. One day I heard the phrase "If Americans came from Europeans why are there still Europeans?" That was one of the major turning points in my thinking when I started to realize the logical mistakes I was making. I credit that phrase for playing a big part in my atheism.

[–]Dispro 8ポイント9ポイント  (0子コメント)

So what you're saying is those damn Europeans are anti-Jesus!!

[–]movings 12ポイント13ポイント  (1子コメント)

That's a really great simile, actually. Same thing happens with languages; if English came from (West) Germanic, why is there still German?

[–]bam2_89 12ポイント13ポイント  (0子コメント)

TLDR: Tower of Babel

[–]TitansAllTheWayDown 3ポイント4ポイント  (0子コメント)

I can relate to this way too much

[–]crgnam 3ポイント4ポイント  (0子コメント)

Don't worry too bad. Darwin himself grappled with that very question, however he discovered a GENIUS solution and "comeback".

When asked "Where are the intermediate species? Show us the missing link!".

Darwin would reply: "I'll show you the intermediate species between Ape and Man once you can show me the intermediate species between a Chihuahua and a Saint Bernard"

I'll be honest, I forget the exact quote... Perhaps Darwin did not use those two exact species, but it demonstrates a very important point. WE designed and documented the creation of both the Chihuahua and the Saint Bernard. No one disputes that. However it's impossible to show a direct connection between the two of them, because that isn't how "evolution" works! Darwin realized this, and one of his best insights was relating Natural Selection to the already established practice of Artificial Selection.

[–]lftovrporkshoulder 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

Or, "if alligators exist, how can crocodiles exist?" Even a common sense answer can approximate the conclusion: "There was a time when the two species had a common ancestor in the same geographic region, but two groups were separated and no longer had contact with one another. Over time they both seperately evolved according to their current environments."

[–]magichocolateunicornMUSLIM PRAYER CURTAIN 7ポイント8ポイント  (1子コメント)

Fossilization is pretty rare and there's no Homo Habilis version of Arlington National Cemetery to dig up.

[–]Musikteknoise 6ポイント7ポイント  (0子コメント)

Holy shit Grandma! there are a million dryopithecus on the planet today? I've been to a lot of zoo's and I ain't ever seen even one.

[–]kunuri 5ポイント6ポイント  (0子コメント)

Oooh, see I didn't get it at first but then they put (the between species' in parentheses and it suddenly all made sense, thanks for the clarification gran gran.

[–]Gandtea 3ポイント4ポイント  (0子コメント)

People making this pic are those in between.

[–]walltowallgreens 3ポイント4ポイント  (0子コメント)

We murdered them, so there could be billions of us. The chimp was too cute and not enough of a threat to murder.

[–]LaurenceQuint 3ポイント4ポイント  (0子コメント)

I always love lectures on evolution from people who don't understand evolution.

[–]cosmo7 4ポイント5ポイント  (0子コメント)

Evolution is amazing because it means that if a frog, for instance, gets tired of being a frog it can just change into a bird and fly away.

-- Richard Dawkins

[–]LanePhillyAdam and Eve, not Adam and Steve. 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

If purple came from red and blue then why is there still red and blue?

[–]whodatdan0 3ポイント4ポイント  (5子コメント)

it is just a theory

[–]awkwardcactusturtle 0ポイント1ポイント  (4子コメント)

In case you're serious, gravity is also "just a theory".

[–]whodatdan0 3ポイント4ポイント  (2子コメント)

I'm making a comment on the "forwardsfromgrandma" section. Do you think I'm serious?

[–]awkwardcactusturtle 2ポイント3ポイント  (1子コメント)

Couldn't detect a hint of sarcasm in your comment. My bad.

[–]whodatdan0 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

I forget that sarcasm doesn't type well

[–]bananasandpie 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

Tbh, I'm seriously doubting gravity these days, it just doesn't make a whole lot of sense.

[–]sejope 3ポイント4ポイント  (1子コメント)

Why have billions when I can have.... MILLIONS! MUAHHAHAHAHA... No, but seriously.... there are billions of people. Not millions.

[–]Cyhawk 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

There are millions of people, thousands of millions of people. ;)

[–]theatheistpreacher 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

"millions"

[–]D_rotic 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

That's not how it works asshole...

[–]TralanImpeach Obummer 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

That... that's not how that works, Nana. I just don't have the patience to explain it to your old, ignorant ass.

[–]ooaalex01 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

I usually find them at Walmart

[–]AltenbacherBier 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

So Grandma wants that future generations also forget about her?

[–]crowdedbalcony 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

Checkmate, atheists!

[–]Fifty_Stalins 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

Pretty much the same reason so many big carnivores are endangered.

[–]Neocoustic 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

Something something branching speciation.

[–]strongbob25 1ポイント2ポイント  (1子コメント)

I'm confused, are there actually millions of Kahl Drogos around?

[–]blackseaoftreesan immigrant stole my bootstraps!!1! 2ポイント3ポイント  (0子コメント)

It is known.

[–]WINZOW -1ポイント0ポイント  (0子コメント)

Did you tell her that many of the existing primates are quite close to extinction? Never mind it wouldn't really matter anyways.

[–]the_rabbit_of_power 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

In the ground mostly, some are in museums.

[–]CaptainCipherBurn your draft card if you like, it's good to disagree 1ポイント2ポイント  (0子コメント)

You see grandma, we discovered this thing called "science" and it says you're wrong. Sorry

[–]rabidkiwi13 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

because dwarfy black chump is not the same as the bigy chumps on today times. you feel me

[–]The_Time_Master 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

http://www.bornagainpagan.com/cartoons/068-doonesbury-creationism.jpg

Shut the fuck up grandma, your Talking Heads are trying to control you.

[–]Robotimus 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

They sell car insurance on TV Gram.

[–]nullpassword 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

Assuming that's a chimp, there are between 150 and 250 thousand in the world not "millions". sadly. if creation were true why not a hollow ball with the sun at the center. We could have so much more landmass.

[–]wollington 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

That's just not how any of this works

[–]that_looks__great 0ポイント1ポイント  (0子コメント)

There are literally dozens of millions of humans