[–]DeweyCheatamAndHowe 4356 ポイント4357 ポイント  (260子コメント)

Going to any famous landmark and being the only ones there.

[–]tumbler_fluff 2332 ポイント2333 ポイント  (58子コメント)

Let's drive up to the Griffith Observatory on Saturday and get away from these crowds!

[–]res30stupid 617 ポイント618 ポイント  (22子コメント)

Yeah, at least I could come up with a decent explanation.

'Come meet me over by the Statue of Liberty on Tuesday at 10 in the morning.'

'Won't there be people there?'

'Yeah, except that it's the middle of March. Very few tourists at this time of year, lets you see all the spots with little hassle. Great for CIA meetings, surprisingly.'

[–]autorotatingKiwi 402 ポイント403 ポイント  (13子コメント)

Or "nah they are filming a movie there and will have it all blocked off to the public, but I know the director"

[–]_Toranaga_ 2064 ポイント2065 ポイント  (124子コメント)

A few years ago I was in Rome and missed the last train back to the city where we were staying. Decided to just wander around all night until we could catch an early train the next morning.

We ended up seeing many of the famous sites like the Spanish Steps or Trevi Fountain super early in the morning, like 2 or 3 am. There were only a couple kids at the fountain and the steps were completely deserted.

I felt like I was experiencing one of those bullshit fake movie moments. The entire city of Rome felt deserted and crazy surreal. I'm actually really glad I missed that train. It was one of the more unique experiences in my life.

[–]bilog78 219 ポイント220 ポイント  (27子コメント)

super early in the morning, like 2 or 3 am

So early in the morning that I would have called that super late in the night, go figure ;-)

And yes, cities at those hours have a wonderful «ghost city» charm that makes them pretty unique.

[–]Dilsnoofus 483 ポイント484 ポイント  (27子コメント)

Hero always finds a parking spot right out front, too.

[–]funkyb 162 ポイント163 ポイント  (9子コメント)

Leslie Nielsen pulling up to a spot with a "reserved for protagonist" sign would have been good in the naked gun movies.

Peter Griffin doing the same but waiting like 2 minutes while they animate a tow truck towing out another car from the spot would make a good family guy joke.

Roger being the guy they towed and seeking vengeance on the tow truck operator for 20 minutes before forgetting what he was doing/getting bored would make a good American dad joke.

[–]jepp530 2590 ポイント2591 ポイント  (276子コメント)

Playing video games. They look like they are having a seizure with the controller. Really it would be terribly boring because your hands/fingers don't really move that much.

[–]UnicornCan 1243 ポイント1244 ポイント  (133子コメント)

I once saw a, err, certain type of film where the girl was playing a video game as part of the "plot". She was actually playing it too. I never expected that attention to detail in that certain type of film

[–]DPaulRadio 2236 ポイント2237 ポイント  (235子コメント)

When people pause before shooting someone, giving them a chance to do something completely unrealistic to get away. If there's somebody dangerous and I have a gun pointed at them I'm going to just shoot, no questions asked. I'll drop my pun after killing them.

[–]kylestephens54 1165 ポイント1166 ポイント  (112子コメント)

"Any final words?"

UGH

[–]PloBoarder 919 ポイント920 ポイント  (87子コメント)

Greetings, Superhero. You are probably wondering where you are. Allow me to explain the location of my secret base to which I brought you to, and spend the next ten minutes telling you my master plan while you have some time to think of an escape plan.

[–]PartiesLikeIts1999 1579 ポイント1580 ポイント  (52子コメント)

You sly dog, you got me monologuing! I can't believe it

[–]Mollywobbles225 478 ポイント479 ポイント  (35子コメント)

The Incredibles is the best Disney movie for picking apart all of the superhero tropes and introducing us to one new one: No Capes. They seriously need to change the Cape Snag page to this.

[–]Psyladine 98 ポイント99 ポイント  (1子コメント)

So poetic that Syndrome's super hero envy in adopting a cape was his undoing.

[–]otoren 2017 ポイント2018 ポイント  (277子コメント)

Sprinklers. Someone holds up a lighter and suddenly everyone in the building is soaking wet.

If you manage to trip a sprinkler head, every sprinkler in the building doesn't go off. If they did, they'd all have to be replaced and that shit gets expensive. The life safety system will trigger and the alarms go off, but only the sprinklers in the area that is hot will trip.

Edit: Since everyone on Reddit likes to make a point, yes, deluge systems do this. I have yet to see a movie in a high hazard situation where someone is trying to set off the fire safety systems. More often they want to blow those places up.

[–]Gougaloupe 202 ポイント203 ポイント  (46子コメント)

Plus, that shit is probably going to be disgusting filth-water.

[–]Fenwick23 180 ポイント181 ポイント  (32子コメント)

Yeah, that water isn't fresh drinking water. It's water that's sat stagnant in a black iron pipe for ten years. Seen the aftermath of a sprinkler head broken by maintenance guys. Shit's totally nasty, yo. Black, slimy, and stinks.

[–]urban_sarcasm 454 ポイント455 ポイント  (65子コメント)

As a kid I remember watching Mr. Wizard demonstrate how those sprinklers work (this was the '80's so I'm going to assume it's still the same tech): The flow of water is apparently held back by a metal with a very low melting point, similar to solder. When there's a flame underneath, the metal melts and the water flows which means each sprinkler head is its own unit. As you said, only the ones subjected to sufficient heat will dispense water.

[–]rocketsocks 286 ポイント287 ポイント  (18子コメント)

I'm not sure which design is more common but the ones I've seen use a small glass container full of alcohol. The alcohol expands when it gets hot and breaks the glass, causing the sprinkler to go off.

[–]FightGar 212 ポイント213 ポイント  (3子コメント)

Glass bulb is pretty much the industry standard at this point

[–]adamrocks84 4312 ポイント4313 ポイント  (407子コメント)

It gets to me when people are driving and they move the steering wheel way to much for driving on a straight road. Do that in real life and you're all over the road.

[–]LordAlvis 2886 ポイント2887 ポイント  (144子コメント)

To add to this, people on TV or in movies barely glance at the road while they have a conversation and drive. If you're maintaining eye contact with the passenger, how do you even know to move the steering wheel so much?

[–]adamrocks84 1451 ポイント1452 ポイント  (82子コメント)

That's the other point I forgot to put into my comment too. I'm always nervous for the drivers when they do this. I'm thinking "Look at the goddamm road or you're going to hit something!".

[–]LordAlvis 1035 ポイント1036 ポイント  (49子コメント)

I like to imagine fire hydrants, mailboxes, pedestrians, etc. just bouncing off the windshield as they casually have their little chat on the highway.

[–]ImpurityElement 1291 ポイント1292 ポイント  (31子コメント)

One of the best scenes in Airplane. Guy is just talking and swerving the wheel, you see the road weaving like crazy behind him, he hits a cyclist, and somehow ends up driving in front of a band of cowboys.

[–]TaterSoup 1401 ポイント1402 ポイント  (24子コメント)

Every single scene in Airplane is "one of the best scenes in Airplane"

[–]wOlfLisK 65 ポイント66 ポイント  (2子コメント)

I think the best scene in Airplane is Airplane.

[–]beef_in_the_dark 1421 ポイント1422 ポイント  (58子コメント)

I tried that once and ended up doing a breathalyzer.

[–]Thurwell 597 ポイント598 ポイント  (47子コメント)

I was dodging pot holes on the way to work this morning wondering how drunk I look.

[–]Blitzableitoah 4948 ポイント4949 ポイント  (377子コメント)

Teachers giving one motivation speech and suddenly all kids turn into saints.

[–]yakusokuN8 4384 ポイント4385 ポイント  (63子コメント)

How do I reach these kids?!

[–]FalstaffsMind 1281 ポイント1282 ポイント  (184子コメント)

[–]2joker1 1650 ポイント1651 ポイント  (158子コメント)

"This video is unavailable in your country"

I'm in America. What the fuck YouTube!? Is this what it feels like to be Australian?

[–]IamVasi 1066 ポイント1067 ポイント  (86子コメント)

Now imagine this but with every music video ever uploaded on Youtube. By the way, have you ever wanted to know how what it feels like to live in Germany?

Edit: Wow, 1000 Hochwähls. Alles dank der GEMA! Dieser Haufen Ottos.

[–]Fenwick23 61 ポイント62 ポイント  (2子コメント)

My mother was a math teacher at Los Angeles Unified and knew Jaime Escalate. Jaime hated the artitic license taken in the movie Stand and Deliver because it trivialized the years of work it took to build a decent math department that could educate the kids starting as freshmen so they could pass Calc AP. He felt it was insulting to the kids who busted their asses for years to portray them as ghetto 'bangers just waiting for Edward James Olmos to show up and tell them they could be AP Calculus rock stars if they just apply themselves for a couple months.

[–]s1apshot 396 ポイント397 ポイント  (37子コメント)

And theyre 2 letter grades smarter

[–]drclairefraser 3405 ポイント3406 ポイント  (452子コメント)

All the bad guys are horrible shots and the heroes never miss.

[–]ncou524 360 ポイント361 ポイント  (23子コメント)

The bad guys are just good enough to hit the protagonist in the shoulder towards the end of the movie.

[–]Thurwell 42 ポイント43 ポイント  (10子コメント)

Movie hero shoulders are apparently blobs of dead tissue. Rather than a delicate joint that would probably require multiple surgeries and months of rehab to repair.

[–]chepalleee 2712 ポイント2713 ポイント  (177子コメント)

That is why I like the new James Bonds. In the new ones he is just tough as nails, running through walls, gets shot and stabbed multiple times. He even gets his fucking balls crushed by an insanely large monkey's fist, and laughs his ass off.

The old(er) ones with Pierce he gets shot at by 300 anonymous henchmen all named Vladmir and every single bullet avoids him. You ain't Neo, man.

[–]h0bb1tm1ndtr1x 2118 ポイント2119 ポイント  (116子コメント)

Every Bond including Pierce to be precise. It's like it was an unwritten rule that Bond could only be captured by the main villain and hurt/tortured by said villain or his/her named henchmen.

I personally love the joke: a Stormtrooper and a Red Shirt get into a firefight. The Stormtrooper misses every shot, and the Red Shirt still dies.

[–]KhaoticOrd3r 974 ポイント975 ポイント  (152子コメント)

I think John Wick did a pretty good job of doing this pretty stylishly. I might just be a gun fu nut though.

[–]LegendaryRav 630 ポイント631 ポイント  (42子コメント)

I was surprised in a scene he actually took damage and wasn't an unstoppable force of god. Just a really pissed off man on a mission.

[–]Hujopaz 149 ポイント150 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Well it's also really good at showing that this guy hasn't done anything for 4 years. He was great before so he's still good now, but not untouchable.

[–]Xygonn 176 ポイント177 ポイント  (51子コメント)

Notably, the round counts were accurate for the type of guns being used as well.

[–]TheDefected 2701 ポイント2702 ポイント  (274子コメント)

Defibrillators - They don't bring back people from the dead.

[–]Dovahbobb 3184 ポイント3185 ポイント  (118子コメント)

Obviously you've never played Battlefield

[–]BearBryant 2824 ポイント2825 ポイント  (91子コメント)

Shot through the head?

Blown up by a JDAM?

Crushed by a tank?

Exploded by a grenade?

BeepBeep BZZZZZRTTT

Good as new!

Highly relevant: http://i.imgur.com/LPoPe1I.png

[–]ideletedlastaccount 925 ポイント926 ポイント  (27子コメント)

You forgot my favorite

Shocked by defibrilator?

BZZZT

Good as new!

BZZZRT

Dead

BZZZRT

Good as new!

[–]boobonk 101 ポイント102 ポイント  (22子コメント)

Every fucking time they show asystole before they shock.

[–]pinky2906 4454 ポイント4455 ポイント  (505子コメント)

Drinking from obviously-empty cups

[–]rianeiru 2007 ポイント2008 ポイント  (171子コメント)

This bugs me so much, but I feel like a crazy person for being bothered by it. I think my real issue is that there's an easy fix for it, but no one ever seems to do it.

I mean, I know the props people would be stupid to actually put liquid in the cup, it could spill and mess up the set or costumes, but if they put something solid like clay in the bottom of the cup it would at least have a more natural heft to it when the actors pick it up or put it down.

Unfortunately, it still might not fix the way the actors sometimes get handed a "full" cup of coffee and then immediately take the kind of full-tilt swig of it you would only take when you're down to the dregs.

[–]catsinhatsandwigs 1026 ポイント1027 ポイント  (101子コメント)

but if they put something solid like clay in the bottom of the cup it would at least have a more natural heft to it when the actors pick it up or put it down.

Exactly!! They make fake newspapers and stuff. How hard would it be to create a slightly weighted coffee cup?

[–]writer-lane 147 ポイント148 ポイント  (12子コメント)

Former prop master here, I have weighted cups or used flat coca cola for coffee (because you can't keep coffee warm for the actors constantly), but MY biggest beef was when actors would ask me to lighten their suitcases to nil empty. In theatre they wanted them heavy/full, but for some reason on a film set they wanted them empty. They look like they're skipping about with something that should have heft to it.

But actors almost always win the arguments, 99% of the time.

[–]hochizo 1053 ポイント1054 ポイント  (57子コメント)

They make fake newspapers and stuff

I was an extra in a movie once. We were supposed to be a young, hip, high-powered attorney's office (another "fake-as-shit" trope), so they were handing out props to help us fit the part. I got an empty coffee cup and a fake newspaper. After one practice run the director walks by, looks at me, and grabs the paper out of my hand. He hands it to a props guy and says "girls don't read newspapers, get her something else," and walks off. I carried an empty coffee cup and a blue file folder instead.

Strangest gender stereotype I think I've ever heard.

[–]Billy_Pilgrim86 161 ポイント162 ポイント  (10子コメント)

Well if dude was going to be weirdly sexist, shouldn't he have given you a pink folder instead?

[–]randym99 191 ポイント192 ポイント  (6子コメント)

I'm imagining someone getting their coffee at starbucks and immediately dumping it onto their own face

[–]perfik09 925 ポイント926 ポイント  (60子コメント)

Thank you!! This is the worst act of laziness from the props department.

[–]itsnathanhere 3978 ポイント3979 ポイント  (672子コメント)

Any sentence containing "mainframe".

[–]s1apshot 236 ポイント237 ポイント  (8子コメント)

But how else would we get to see their sick keyboard smacking skills?

[–]TheNewGuyToReddit 2157 ポイント2158 ポイント  (100子コメント)

Ok, I will create a GUI in Visual Basic and trace their IPs.

[–]Theory5 639 ポイント640 ポイント  (35子コメント)

Or firewall, or just any technical terms whatsoever...

"I"m building a firewall around the program so the virus doesn't infect our network... oops it escaped!" facepalm

[–]paperarmory 211 ポイント212 ポイント  (3子コメント)

Well, there's your problem. Your IT guy is an idiot.

Edit word

[–]LordPeePerz 147 ポイント148 ポイント  (64子コメント)

Anytime I hear "Mainframe" I immediately think of AS400

[–]Slug_DC 2466 ポイント2467 ポイント  (322子コメント)

Also anytime someone refers to copying a file to a thumb drive as "downloading".

Double negative points if this action is accompanied by a progress bar that takes up a 3rd of the screen.

[–]itsnathanhere 1443 ポイント1444 ポイント  (229子コメント)

And don't forget the loud, audible beeping sounds with overzealous UI animations. Ugh I need to lie down.

[–]WillWorkForSugar 379 ポイント380 ポイント  (43子コメント)

DOWNLOADING: 67%

[–]chrono14 816 ポイント817 ポイント  (38子コメント)

"DOWNLOADING FILE...COMPLETED" (said in robotic female voice, just like your home computer does).

[–]Toodlum 797 ポイント798 ポイント  (110子コメント)

Just like how hacking is done by typing on the keyboard as fast as humanly possible while code drops down the screen like The Matrix?

[–]groenroos 925 ポイント926 ポイント  (42子コメント)

Also, everything is blue. Every UI ever is always completely entirely blue.

[–]BazzleExpedition 919 ポイント920 ポイント  (69子コメント)

After sex nobody does any clean up. Apparently everyone is cool just laying in their own cum.

[–]That_Tall_Guy 2178 ポイント2179 ポイント  (190子コメント)

When the characters don't communicate. Seems like there are a lot of movies/stories where there is some sort of dilemma but if they just sat and talked for a minute and explained what happened it would be fine. Seems like lazy writing sometimes.

[–]ugottahvbluhair 317 ポイント318 ポイント  (31子コメント)

It always bothers me when kids try to solve horrible problems on their own when telling an adult would completely fix the situation.

[–]Explosive_Diaeresis 42 ポイント43 ポイント  (1子コメント)

Or when they do, it's not nearly enough.

"Sir, you have to see this." "Ok, I'll be right there"

Umm no, how about you tell what the hell you're looking at.

[–]WW4O 40 ポイント41 ポイント  (2子コメント)

I hate when character tension seems to be as logical as "If I spoke to so-and-so how I feel, then it would work out, and we can't have that."

[–]another_new_username 2836 ポイント2837 ポイント  (520子コメント)

It's a semiautomatic pistol/rifle. Yes, the sound of the slide being racked sounds cool and all, but if you do it more than once, you're just flinging unfired rounds everywhere.

[–]SplodeyDope 2010 ポイント2011 ポイント  (206子コメント)

Also, guns always making a cocking sound every time they're raised. So often you'll see someone raise a gun, you hear it being cocked, they lower it for whatever reason, then raise it again and you hear the same sound but they never decocked it. Its like they want you to think guns just bark at you when ever they're pointed at you.

[–]Toodlum 724 ポイント725 ポイント  (34子コメント)

As if the bad guy wouldn't already have his gun cocked.

[–]Droidball 556 ポイント557 ポイント  (63子コメント)

Not just that, but the rattling or clacking sound any firearm makes any time it's moved a millimeter, even if not being pointed at anyone.

And that hammerless firearms make a cocking sound, too - a guy points a Glock, and you hear a hammer cock, or a safety being disengaged if you want to be optimistic.

EDIT: I realize a Glock has no external safety lever, that was my point. Worded poorly, I admit, but I was trying to point out that there's no external controls on a Glock that would be making such a noise.

[–]hopsbarleyyeastwater 260 ポイント261 ポイント  (66子コメント)

Not to mention, what would happen if you needed to shoot your gun in an emergency before you had the chance to rack your slide? No one in movies carries a round in the chamber.

[–]Checkers10160 552 ポイント553 ポイント  (55子コメント)

This has been a constant source of annoyance since I was a kid. Let's say the bad guy is holding the good guy at gun point. After a long monologue, he racks the slide. Were you seriously just holding a gun to someone, without being cocked, or even having a round chambered? You might as well have held your fingers in the shape of a gun

[–]grumptrump 157 ポイント158 ポイント  (31子コメント)

Or when the bad guy is about to shoot the good guy, but it turns out he was out of ammo. For Christ's sake, if your pistol was out of ammo, the slide would stay back, it would be obvious.

[–]SirShitdickingtonIV 4543 ポイント4544 ポイント  (367子コメント)

How everyone in highschool is in their late 20's.

[–]Hoatzinnn 2674 ポイント2675 ポイント  (145子コメント)

It's like porn all over again. "Teen" my ass. This 35 year old broad has ponytails and bright coloured clothes. That doesn't equal teen dammit.

[–]BRINGBACKTHEMACHINE 1309 ポイント1310 ポイント  (25子コメント)

But she still has her pastel shoes on, everyone knows teens fuck with shoes on

[–]SirJuncan 1072 ポイント1073 ポイント  (12子コメント)

"Baby let's do it."

"Hold on, let me get my shoes."

I'm glad high school is over.

[–]Tinfoil_King 3302 ポイント3303 ポイント  (144子コメント)

Labor laws for one. Secondly, relative age shift perception.

Back in middle school the girls in my class looked attractive. Highschool looked older, but in the same ball park. College students looked like young adults. Fifty something had one foot in the grave.

Now at 30 middle schoolers look only slightly older than toddlers. High school students look like that should be in middle school. Most college students under 25 now make me feel like I'd end up on a pedophile watch list if I tried dating one.

To a certain age group and above those twenty somethings may look high school age.

Then again maybe I'm weird.

[–]Carbon_Dirt 632 ポイント633 ポイント  (41子コメント)

It makes sense. Also child actors are... well, child actors. They're not all as good as Freddie Highmore and Dakota Fanning. More often, they're Dennis-the-Menace and Last-Airbender levels of bad.

Though I will say, this whole aging-down-actors thing has completely ruined my ability to guess peoples' ages in real life.

[–]Spytap 140 ポイント141 ポイント  (15子コメント)

Let's be honest: the actors in Last Airbender were pretty far down the "how the fuck has this gone so wrong?" list.

[–]Master119 1207 ポイント1208 ポイント  (157子コメント)

Incorrect sound effects. I hate the sword drawing SCHWING sound, and the "I just lifted my gun" ka-click.

[–]LordAlvis 584 ポイント585 ポイント  (48子コメント)

Movies would have you believe SCHWING is the sound that steel makes on leather.

[–]TheAustr0naut 1441 ポイント1442 ポイント  (54子コメント)

Bullets are flying everywhere, yet the hero is protected from any harm by hiding behind a ficus

[–]Facerless 3194 ポイント3195 ポイント  (258子コメント)

When there's a gun fight and car doors stop high caliber rounds

Edit: The pedants on this site wouldn't be happy if I was specific down to the bullet's grain, so piss off you know what I mean.

[–]SteelyTuba 1291 ポイント1292 ポイント  (93子コメント)

Or any rounds bigger than a pellet gun. Seriously, it's just sheet metal. That shit isn't armor.

[–]thelieswetell 981 ポイント982 ポイント  (52子コメント)

But I drive a 1984 suburban, it's almost armor.

[–]asok0 1185 ポイント1186 ポイント  (28子コメント)

1984 Suburban: This vehicle has gone __ hours without major transmission work.

[–]Maynguene_banana 133 ポイント134 ポイント  (10子コメント)

It is armor, just not for this century.

[–]Shaysdays 2250 ポイント2251 ポイント  (225子コメント)

In a dystopian future where water and resources are scare, everyone has the magical ability to shave their legs, chest and armpits and groom their eyebrows.

I'm willing to forgive well kept hair, but the whole "waxed body" thing is dumb.

[–]Droidball 598 ポイント599 ポイント  (25子コメント)

End of the world, but every female character has perfectly maintained, styled, and blow dried hair.

[–]John_T_Conover 370 ポイント371 ポイント  (14子コメント)

And the men have roughly 1 week of stubble for months on end.

[–]antipatheia 431 ポイント432 ポイント  (18子コメント)

Also, perfect teeth.

[–]wingedmurasaki 943 ポイント944 ポイント  (69子コメント)

How about perfectly smooth armpits on ladies in the medieval period?

[–]Anusien 242 ポイント243 ポイント  (22子コメント)

Battlestar Galactica is stuck out in space with no new supplies. They are constantly in danger of running out of fuel, water, and food. But they have a limitless supply of eye shadow.

[–]musicflower 2152 ポイント2153 ポイント  (250子コメント)

When people are pretending to play instruments and they clearly have absolutely no idea what they are doing. The prop department could at least teach them how to hold the fucking things, it makes me so angry.

[–]PleaseThankU 1016 ポイント1017 ポイント  (37子コメント)

Its not the Props dept job!! Its the director's job to hire a musician consultant!

[–]musicflower 266 ポイント267 ポイント  (8子コメント)

Whoever's job it is!! They just need to fix it!

[–]Jaexyn 2076 ポイント2077 ポイント  (236子コメント)

Covering someones mouth in duct tape. Shit don't stick to wet, humid surfaces. Breathing causes humidity. Might not fall clean off, but it wouldn't stifle speech.

Edit: Too many of you know too much about how many times to wrap tape around someone's head lol.

[–]corpsejelly 870 ポイント871 ポイント  (19子コメント)

This is why you wrap it all the way around the head, taping the duct tape to the duct tape, not to the persons skin. Just make sure it's tight.

Or so I've heard....

[–]Thrackerz0d 1505 ポイント1506 ポイント  (52子コメント)

Wait... it doesn't work?

Brb

[–]So_Motarded 231 ポイント232 ポイント  (21子コメント)

I remember testing this when I was a kid. I'd recently watched Charlie's Angels, and there's a part where Drew Barrymore was tied to a chair with duct tape over her mouth. The villain was making some kind of important phone call and Barrymore was struggling to make any kind of noise to let the person on the phone know she was in trouble (or something; it's been a few years).

Considering all the ridiculous over-the-top action that had gotten them out of tricky situations up until that point in the movie, my kid self was thinking "Oh come on, even I could get out of that!"

So I got a roll of duct tape and smoothed it over my mouth and cheeks. Shit was easy. I was able to move my jaw and tongue to get a gap in it within seconds. Sure, I couldn't completely remove the whole thing, but I'd be shouting for help easily.

From then on, using tape as a gag ruined movie immersion for me. It's a really shitty way to keep someone quiet. Movies also seem to really underestimate how much noise a person can make through their nose. It's like "oh the character's lips are sealed shut? Guess they'll be 100% silent at this crucial moment!"

[–]TDBUDDAH 3417 ポイント3418 ポイント  (633子コメント)

When a cell call goes through with no delay, or a laptop fires up in .1 second, or a hacker gets into a secure account in 5 clicks of a keyboard.

Shit takes time, bro.

[–]hungrierdave 1453 ポイント1454 ポイント  (17子コメント)

I loved in Arrested Development when Michael went to meet with a lawyer about a news special on TV. The lawyer tried to show him the clip on TV, but they had to wait for commercials and for it to actually air.

[–]prtyfly4awytguy9 978 ポイント979 ポイント  (9子コメント)

"Now imagine how impressive that would've been if it showed up right away!"

[–]cstemple 2400 ポイント2401 ポイント  (124子コメント)

All about the ssd bro

[–]SHIT_DOWN_MY_PEEHOLE 2194 ポイント2195 ポイント  (100子コメント)

clackety clackety clackety

Bro, I'm in the FBI's mainframe

[–]HeyZuesHChrist 1200 ポイント1201 ポイント  (48子コメント)

Or when somebody is trying to "hack" their system. "He's good. But I'm better!" as they clackety clackety clackety and try to stop them.

And then some stupid skull and crossbones logo or some shit pops up on the screen.

[–]LeGama 170 ポイント171 ポイント  (14子コメント)

Like when the skull and cross bones pops up on the alien computer in independence day, like why even waste the time programing that when you're hacking an alien computer?

[–]HeyZuesHChrist 90 ポイント91 ポイント  (4子コメント)

like why even waste the time programing that when you're hacking an alien computer?

I thought of that scene as I was typing out my previous response, but I understand why they did it. Because, fuck you aliens, that's why!

I think the skull and crossbones image is kind of universal for bipeds and you want those alien assholes to know that you totally outsmarted them.

[–]Tomislav_Sunic 598 ポイント599 ポイント  (14子コメント)

Sudo.hackzthefbi

[–]vlasvilneous 220 ポイント221 ポイント  (5子コメント)

they discovered my cleverly disguised script on the FBI core servers?

NNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!

[–]gallifrey5 914 ポイント915 ポイント  (121子コメント)

Yeah, everyone knows you need two people typing on the same keyboard in order to get anything done.

[–]Greylen 323 ポイント324 ポイント  (8子コメント)

My brain can only process this video as an obvious attempt to troll anyone who is somewhat competent with a computer. When I first saw this I just couldn't wrap my head around someone being so out of touch with using a computer that they thought this was at all feasible. I see the script writers sitting in a room going "this is really going to chap their collective asses! Nerrrrrddds!"

[–]GrobbyGrob 595 ポイント596 ポイント  (67子コメント)

No please, not this video... oh god so embarrassing

[–]rabid_chinchilla 577 ポイント578 ポイント  (40子コメント)

And entirely intentional. They know their audience doesn't know shit about computers so they dick around.

[–]CptCap 76 ポイント77 ポイント  (14子コメント)

The big ass red flashing messages like "COMPILATION SUCCESSFUL". No one would ever use and IDE doing this.

[–]TDBUDDAH 80 ポイント81 ポイント  (8子コメント)

I saw one I think where the message was "HACK COMPLETE" or some bullshit like that.... maybe I just watch to many bad shows...

[–]kaz00m 351 ポイント352 ポイント  (86子コメント)

Yup was watching a show the other day where the main character is an expert hacker (not going to name the show for the sake of my dignity). Anyways they're like "you have 30 seconds to impress us before we kick you out" and she's like okay takes out her laptop finds their hidden wifi network hacks in somehow gets a hold of old wifi traffic data and shows that one of the other characters has a tinder-like page set up under a different name. Like no you can't do that in 30 seconds

[–]jstrydor 325 ポイント326 ポイント  (30子コメント)

yeah, I'd need at least a minute to access the old tinder data mainframe

[–]doctorish 649 ポイント650 ポイント  (45子コメント)

Do you want a 90 minute film of someone just clicky clacking at a keyboard in a dimly lit room, swearing to themselves a few times, part way through their mom calls them down to dinner instead?

[–]wetwater 659 ポイント660 ポイント  (25子コメント)

Easy parking. In the middle of Times Square and the character needs to park his car so he can chase after that prostitute with a heart of gold and tells her he loves her? Bam! Doesn't even need to double park, or feed the meter, or parallel park. Just a nice open spot for him to pull into.

[–]SnoopyLoves 850 ポイント851 ポイント  (104子コメント)

When someone tries to figure out a password. They'll look around the room and be like, "Paris! Her favorite city - that must be her password!" And it works. Fuck all y'all.

Edit: because someone actually gives a shit about the contraction "y'all."

[–]zapbark 49 ポイント50 ポイント  (9子コメント)

Right now, the most common passwords at companies that require that they be changed every 90 days with a mixture of 8 or more capitals, lowercase and numbers are:

  • March2015
  • February2015 (the correct spelling)
  • Feburary2015 (The more common spelling)
  • January2015
  • December2014

[–]Oax_Mike 4337 ポイント4338 ポイント  (906子コメント)

More so TV shows than movies...but people who are supposedly poor and struggling always live in super nice apartments with nice shit and no mess.

Edit: Catching some grief for saying poor people can't be tidy. They can. But I wasn't saying poor people are dirty, just that in general people who are struggling don't live in immaculately clean homes to the level they are on TV.

[–]Blitzableitoah 1382 ポイント1383 ポイント  (257子コメント)

Transformers 4. Said to struggle financially, but beautiful house, all the boots, top internet, no issues buying makeup etc... Movies are as guilty as tv shows sometimes.

[–]Oax_Mike 1790 ポイント1791 ポイント  (195子コメント)

For sure...it happens in movies, too, bit sitcoms are the most guilty...single mom, works at a NYC coffee shop, totally flash 2 bedroom apartment in Manhattan.

Why were you watching Transformers 4?

Edit: Catching grief from fighting robot lovers, too...my issue is less with the "Transformers" and more with the "4". We should have learned our sequel limit with the Police Academy films and Bobcat Goldthwait (sp.).

[–]TheRedditorPredator1 2132 ポイント2133 ポイント  (69子コメント)

Why were you watching Transformers 4?

Real question

[–]Doctursea 3796 ポイント3797 ポイント  (300子コメント)

That's one of the reasons I liked Malcolm in the Middle, their house always had the look of poverty. It was dirty, messed up, poor yard, and appliances constantly breaking down.

Also they didn't live in indiana which a lot of shows are starting to do to make it look like you're simple/poor. Come on people I live here

[–]Posseon1stAve 1932 ポイント1933 ポイント  (124子コメント)

Roseanne was another show known for this. Their living room full of crap they probably bought at garage sales.

[–]guyincognitoo 393 ポイント394 ポイント  (59子コメント)

Semi-related to that, poor people who drive old cars (like 1970's trucks) that are immaculate and run perfectly. Keeping a car that old in that good of shape would cost way more than a used modern car.

*Typo

[–]jfortier777 970 ポイント971 ポイント  (47子コメント)

"Zoom in on those 3 pixels and get me a coherent license plate number.".

[–]iwannabefreddieHg 1427 ポイント1428 ポイント  (48子コメント)

When people just like show up unannounced. Especially romantic movies. The girl always looks flawless. If a guy just showed up at my doorstep. The most likely result would be me in men's sweats with a bun on top of my head eating Cheetos out of my belly button.

UPDATE: to answer all of your questions, I have a really deep belly button.

[–]Wikihonu 2447 ポイント2448 ポイント  (369子コメント)

Inaccuracy in portrayal of pregnancy. Like oh 10 weeks and the baby is kicking. Or when "it's time" the woman is rushed to the hospital and goes through a birth in a few minutes. All LIES!!!!

[–]Booyou79 608 ポイント609 ポイント  (88子コメント)

Or when the baby comes out all clean

[–]hopsbarleyyeastwater 934 ポイント935 ポイント  (32子コメント)

And the size of a 6 month old baby.

[–]Wikihonu 418 ポイント419 ポイント  (10子コメント)

The only semi clean baby I've seen is from a water birth. But that's if you're ignoring the cloud of blood in the tub. Oh and how babies don't look like purple lagoon creatures.

[–]Shaysdays 274 ポイント275 ポイント  (29子コメント)

I don't think anyone has used an actual newborn to play a newborn, either. Most babies you see on film are a couple months old.(or in the case of American Sniper, made of plastic.)

[–]doctorish 2947 ポイント2948 ポイント  (59子コメント)

Alien is a better portrayal of pregnancy/birth.

[–]xmagusx 783 ポイント784 ポイント  (18子コメント)

Do not watch this film with your pregnant wife. Doing so will not improve your day.

[–]Wikihonu 513 ポイント514 ポイント  (21子コメント)

Truth! I woke up twice last night thinking my son was going to burst through my stomach.

[–]quincess 341 ポイント342 ポイント  (18子コメント)

What gets me is when the woman goes to get her first ultrasound, and it shows a fully formed baby and they can tell what the sex is, instead of a fucking dot of an embryo. You are in your first trimester and not even showing yet, there is not an 8 month old baby in your uterus.

[–]cakerton 761 ポイント762 ポイント  (70子コメント)

I hate this! They always feel a contraction and say, "We have to get to the hospital NOW!" like the baby is going to pop out within minutes of your first contraction. Bitch please! I was in labor for 48 hours.

[–]dynamojoe 162 ポイント163 ポイント  (19子コメント)

48 hours probably puts you to the front of the line in the afterlife.

My wife's 2nd was three hours. Not really three hours of labor, I mean three hours from water breaking to crying baby. The downside? No time for an epidural.

[–]Rhombico 59 ポイント60 ポイント  (10子コメント)

To be fair, you hear about babies getting delivered in taxis or on the side of the road. I'd assume that means labor can be that fast. But maybe those people were just slackers, I'd buy that

[–]bananas4anna 99 ポイント100 ポイント  (2子コメント)

Both of mine were FAST. My first was born in under 5 hours, from the first sign that something was up until he was out. My second? I had contractions for less than an hour. Thankfully, we were already at the hospital because my water had broken hours before (no pain, nothing. I just thought I peed my pants) and we knew it was going to be a fast labor (they normally don't admit you to L&D unless you are in labor, but with how my first went, we insisted we stick around. Good thing, too.). My midwife said if I have a 3rd, they are setting up a tent for me in the hospital parking lot when I'm 8 months pregnant.

[–]dedox17 1642 ポイント1643 ポイント  (215子コメント)

The suppressor in the gun... I am not an expert but I am pretty sure that putting a suppressor in a gun does not make it mute... It has a pretty loud significant sound.

Edit: suppressor

[–]sammyp123 912 ポイント913 ポイント  (14子コメント)

It just makes that sweet ppssshhooooo sound from Goldeneye 64.

[–]jurtin 61 ポイント62 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Yup. My entire impression of silencers is that sound from the PP7 or the Deutsche.

[–]thektulu7 569 ポイント570 ポイント  (116子コメント)

Right. Unless you're using subsonic rounds, a shot with a silencer is still pretty loud.

Note: The loud sound in the subsonic ammo clip comes from the cans the bullets are hitting.

[–]dannyhqax 504 ポイント505 ポイント  (58子コメント)

but if you shoot through a pillow it's super silent, right?

[–]dogsordiamonds 2520 ポイント2521 ポイント  (185子コメント)

No one says good bye before they hang up. How many times do you say good bye and the other person still has more to say? How do movie characters always know the conversation is over??

[–]CIearMind 2918 ポイント2919 ポイント  (28子コメント)

"I will look for you, I will find you and I will kill you."

"Good luck."

"kbai, seeya later budy ^.^"

"ttyl :D"

[–]kylestephens54 409 ポイント410 ポイント  (45子コメント)

I know people who do this in real life.

I hate these people.

[–]thektulu7 133 ポイント134 ポイント  (11子コメント)

If it bothers you, don't move to South Korea. Their standard phone expressions are completely different. Once the appropriate information has been sent or received, the customary goodbye is click.

[–]groenroos 1146 ポイント1147 ポイント  (108子コメント)

Whenever someone is "hacking" or doing anything with computers, they bleep and bloop and make all kinds of sci-fi sounds like that. That would be the most annoying shit ever.

[–]RiperSnifle 1027 ポイント1028 ポイント  (69子コメント)

Nobody ever uses a mouse

[–]rianeiru 200 ポイント201 ポイント  (8子コメント)

Or the space bar, control key, shift key, backspace, etc...

[–]thektulu7 491 ポイント492 ポイント  (15子コメント)

A lot of people are all about keyboard shortcuts.

[–]CollidingGalaxies 795 ポイント796 ポイント  (58子コメント)

What really grinds my gears is whenever they show a scene of a car pulling away from ANYWHERE, the tires ALWAYS screech or burn-out.

[–]alienblue314159 294 ポイント295 ポイント  (10子コメント)

Or screeching on concrete sound when coming to a stop on dirt or grass..

[–]boneyjellyfish 119 ポイント120 ポイント  (16子コメント)

CG animals never have any balls.

I mean, come on, are you telling me Aslan wasn't packing?

Look at this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=66UrQWaH8gA - surely at least this lion should have some junk.

[–]googlion 256 ポイント257 ポイント  (18子コメント)

When someone is being chased by a car. Why the fuck do they ALWAYS continue running on a straight road?! You obviously cannot outrun a car.

[–]tehPOD 844 ポイント845 ポイント  (97子コメント)

The concept of time is lost on filmmakers. Examples, both from The Dark Knight Rises, because I was watching it this weekend:

  1. The Wall Street robbery - Sunny out when Bane and Co. go in. When Bane says, "Time to go mobile." they had 8 minutes to go. Dusk when they go out. Batman joins the chase and all of a sudden, night time! And the transmission of the laptop finished just as Batman got to it. So approx 15-20 minutes from sunny day to night time!

  2. Stopping the bomb at the end - Talia says they have 11 minutes. Bomb timer shows approx 11:55 and counting down. [Stansfield]EVERYONE[/Stansfield] takes their little ol' time to get to their vehicles. The Bat shows up and there's still approx 10:55 left on the bomb timer. You mean to tell me that it only took 1 minute for Batman to get to the Bat and for Talia and him to catch up to the truck carrying the bomb? But wait, there's more! Batman and Catwoman taking out the other tumblers, timer now shows a little over 5 minutes. Talia crashes the truck, timer shows under 2 minutes. Batman hooks up the bomb to the Bat, makes out with Catwoman, talks to Gordon, and flies the bomb out into the water in under two minutes?!

Are you fucking kidding me?!

[–]instantanarchy 1090 ポイント1091 ポイント  (79子コメント)

When the character who wears glasses takes his glasses off during "serious business" moments. Have fun squinting pal

[–]tiredtires 304 ポイント305 ポイント  (19子コメント)

Not really an issue anymore because of cell phones, but I used to hate when one character would hang up on another and the second person would hear a dial tone.

[–]openletter8 1365 ポイント1366 ポイント  (118子コメント)

Cars don't explode when shot at. That's lazy filmmaking.

edit

TIL, people like their cars exploding, gawshdurnit.

edit edit

Penn & Teller and Mythbusters took a crack at it. Nope.

Also, I call it lazy filmmaking because, well, it fucking is. If you want to build excitement or intensity, do so with a better plot or with better pacing. Not random, arbitrary explosions. Unless, you are looking to make just a stupid action flick, it's a silly thing to waste the money on shooting.

[–]simockslo 1240 ポイント1241 ポイント  (18子コメント)

Trucks filled with chickens on the other hand...

[–]humanthepequenino 78 ポイント79 ポイント  (11子コメント)

I liked the treatment of this in Last Action Hero. Arnold says some pithy line and shoots at the fleeing villlain's car, expecting it to explode, but because it's real life, he just puts some holes in the body. Arnold concludes the car must be a special bulletproof model.

Edit: spelling

[–]1petrock 602 ポイント603 ポイント  (67子コメント)

My roommate feels that when a person is making a phone call- if the screen dose not shut off after being lifted to their face, the movie/show is ruined.

[–]Brrbank55 134 ポイント135 ポイント  (7子コメント)

Characters picking up obviously empty suitcases. I know it's dumb of me to get so annoyed, but the prop guy couldn't put a sand bag in there? It immediately takes me away from the story when I see actors lifting giant bags like they're King Kong picking up a matchbook.

[–]panken 344 ポイント345 ポイント  (86子コメント)

Almost anything involving a gun. If you are going to play a badass army guy/police officer at least don't "cup and saucer" the gun when you hold it.

Also, hold the pistol high on the grip, not down at the bottom so its always pointing down. (Rick Grimes from Walking Dead, looking at you.)

[–]AffluentWeevil1 1494 ポイント1495 ポイント  (183子コメント)

Bombs that are defused at 1 sec mark, jesus Edit: rip my inbox, biggest comment so far!

[–]GreyDGR 2325 ポイント2326 ポイント  (76子コメント)

Counter terrorists win.

[–]hopsbarleyyeastwater 95 ポイント96 ポイント  (12子コメント)

Yeah once the guy cuts the correct wire after debating for 30 seconds on which one to cut.

Good thing the bomb maker who concocted the elaborate plan which the movie revolves around didn't build a fail safe into his device, just in case a burned out cop with a death wish finds something to live for and decides to become a hero.

[–]reverend_green1 451 ポイント452 ポイント  (111子コメント)

You can always tell when an actor doesn't smoke, because they won't inhale their cigarette. It doesn't really piss me off, but it sticks out pretty badly sometimes.

[–]Derekabutton 286 ポイント287 ポイント  (45子コメント)

Never smoked in my life, and I have never noticed. It must be subtle like the empty cup thing.

[–]reverend_green1 100 ポイント101 ポイント  (22子コメント)

Yeah, it's a more subtle thing that you probably wouldn't pick up on unless you're a smoker. It's not a huge deal, but it can hurt immersion.

[–]kevinsyel 262 ポイント263 ポイント  (47子コメント)

Someone unlocks more than 10% of their brain!

[–]TheSwellFellow 109 ポイント110 ポイント  (41子コメント)

I hate how in The Walking Dead anyone can just pick up a pistol and start racking up headshots. Hitting a moving person in the head with a pistol from 25 yards is incredibly hard.