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EVERYDAY FEMINISM

How Misogyny Shows Up in the Queer Community

by Anna Bongiovanni
How can we in the LGBTQIA+ community help fight misogyny? The sad but necessary truth is that we have to start from within.
This comic shows how objectification, oppressive beauty standards, and other forms of misogyny show up in LGBTQIA+ communities.
Learn why and how we must unlearn these behaviors to create the safe and welcoming space we hope for.
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Click for the Transcript

Panel – Text: Sometimes my queer community feels utopic… Person 1: “Oh yeah. We totally banged last weekend!” Person 2, the narrator: [Concerned look on their face]. Text: So it’s real jolting when I hear misogynistic comments from people I’d otherwise call my friends and allies.
Panel 2 – Speech bubbles that read: “HEY BABY!” “I like the one with the legs!” “You don’t wanna dance with me? Fine. PRUDE.”
Panel 3 – Narrator (with a distressed expression): Like REALLY?! Aren’t most of us within the LGBT community facing some sort of marginalization? Shouldn’t we be sympathetic to the struggles and everyday misogyny people face?
Panel 4 – Text: For example: the objectification and non-consensual sexualization of queers onto other queers. [Two examples of sexual harassment are shown.] Text: this can be done by anyone, regardless of gender presentation.
Panel 5 – Or the exclusion of trans women from queer and/or women’s spaces. [A trans woman sits on a chair reading a book and has a heated expression. Three women sit across from her at a table. They are also holding books and their faces are angry/hostile as they stare at the trans woman.] Text: And not just openly excluding trans women, but also by being generally unwelcoming, misgendering, showing discomfort, and other microaggressions.
Panel 6 – Text: Another example of misogyny is when gay men feel it’s ok to touch or grope women… Man: “Looking good” [Slaps the backside of a queer woman of color.]
Panel 7 – A masculine-presenting person is standing in the middle of the panel. The words “Bow Ties,” “Suits,” “Dapper” surround them. A speech bubble says “Sigh…” Text: Or how the look of mainstream androgyny/Queerness has gravitated toward masculinity.
Panel 8 – Text: Femme or femme-presenting people are constantly having their identities called into question. Masculine-presenting person: “So, are you really gay?” Feminine-presenting person: [They have an angry/annoyed expression on their face.]
Panel 9 – Person 1: “Seriously, I don’t want you hanging out with him!” Person 2: [They have a uncomfortable expression and are sweating.] Text: And, the idea of “owning” the bodies of those we love or date.
Panel 10 – Text: Misogynistic beauty standards cause an erasure of identities to those that don’t fit within the status quo. Person 1: “A date?! I’ve never seen you that way… I didn’t even know you were bi…” A person in a wheelchair is sitting in front of them, giving them a side eye.
Panel 11 – A Black woman is standing in the middle of the panel, speech bubbles standing around her. They read, “Too aggressive,” “Exotic,” “I wouldn’t date a black person,”SASSY!” and “Too dark.” Text: And racialized misogyny which affects women of color.
Panel 12 – A community should be a place where we all feel safe and welcome. The LGBT community should be focused on fighting homophobia, transphobia, and sexism. [A couple is shown with hearts around them.] The sad but necessary truth is that we have to start fighting misogyny from within. [A group of people are shown smiling and standing together.] Misogyny has been taught to us by society, politics, by the world at large. There is a lot to unlearn and a lot of self-examination that needs to go on.
Panel 13 – We need to catch ourselves first… Person 1: “I mean, she’s not that interesting, but I’d hit it anyways.” Narrator: “Oh really? She seemed okay to me…”
Panel 14 – Text: And call out our friends when we can. Narrator: “Actually this conversation is kind of messed up. You’re acting like a gross frat boy, and I’m just egging you on.”
Panel 15 – Text: When people realize this isn’t acceptable, our space can become safer and more welcoming to everyone. Person 1 from the previous two panels: “I am who I am!” Narrator: “No, seriously this is icky. I don’t wanna talk about it anymore.”
Panel 16 – Text: And a space where there is no value difference based on gender identity or expression. Same Person 1: “Well. This is awkward.” Narrator: “I’m okay with that.”
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Anna Bongiovanni is a Contributing Comic Artist for Everyday Feminism. They are a genderqueer cartoonist, zine-maker, and educator living in Minneapolis. They draw comics on gender, feminism, and queer issues. Besides Everyday Feminism, they also draw monthly comics for Autostraddle. A graduate in Comic Art from Minneapolis, they are currently working on their second graphic novel. More of their art can be seen on their blog.
Filed Under: Images, Posts Tagged With: LGBTQIA
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