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submitted by obviouslythrowaway90
It has been 20 days since my post but I would like to admit something. Much of what I previously stated was a lie. Moving back near Jake was stressful because it made me jealous. I wanted to punish him somewhat anonymously. I knew he was a redditor and wanted him to see my post.
Jake is a wonderful boyfriend and a caring dog owner. He isn't acting out a fantasy as many of you suspected. I exaggerated the problem with dog in the bedroom. It is no longer an issue and we would like to move on with our relationship peacefully. I'm considering coming clean a new start and am so happy Jake could forgive me.
tl;dr: I would like to apologize for lying in a previous post.
all 46 comments
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[–]zizzymoo 51 points52 points53 points  (2 children)
I'm glad to see I'm not the only one who thinks this is Jake.
My guess is that someone figured out that the OP was talking about Jake in real life, and he's doing damage control.
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[–]AlbrechtEinstein 10 points11 points12 points  (0 children)
Yeah, if this is the story, the update (thanks reddit, he's a scumbag, we're breaking up) doesn't seem to fit the narrative, because Jake is the audience for the prank and would know that the breakup didn't happen.
I have no idea wtf is happening here.
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[–]FlightyTwilighty 5 points6 points7 points  (0 children)
Yeah, #1, this is really weirdly written and #2, who goes through and replies to everyone in a thread. Someone is trying to do damage control here.
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[–]Lindsey-905 39 points40 points41 points  (2 children)
I call BS. Who takes the time to add a "please see my updated post" reply to so many comments. This "update" is also written in such a wooden way it doesn't sound genuine. Either it's Jake, or Jake is forcing her to write it.
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[–]stephiej17 7 points8 points9 points  (1 child)
It sounds so obviously fake. Jake was so obsessed with his reputation this could only have been written by him.
It makes me laugh to think how long he tried to guess the password before finally getting through. What a loser.
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[–]AlbrechtEinstein 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
Reddit accounts seem to stay logged in forever, so if they share a computer he might not even have had to guess a password.
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[–]megadeadly 30 points31 points32 points  (0 children)
Jake....is that you?
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[–]TXSC 27 points28 points29 points  (0 children)
Really Jake, this is fucking weak. Just leave her the hell alone now, okay? You are a sick man.
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[–]LimeyTart 22 points23 points24 points  (0 children)
Ooooooooooook, Jake.
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[–]RedTheDopeKing 38 points39 points40 points  (1 child)
...that's really fucking strange.
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[–]iamagainstit 9 points10 points11 points  (0 children)
what about the update?
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[–]Spectrum2081 6 points7 points8 points  (0 children)
I don't believe this for a second and since I read the first update I am sure that "calling off the mob" as demanded by the BF is what's going on here. But this is your life, OP. I doubt you lied or even exaggerated (too embarrassing) but I also think or rather hope that after the blow up nothing non consensual is likely to happen again.
Best of luck and godspeed.
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[–]queerhere 6 points7 points8 points  (0 children)
Lol okay jake. Enjoy dogfucking, you creepy rapist.
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[–]69potatolover69 4 points5 points6 points  (0 children)
So this is either Jake, you're being forced to retract your statements, or...you, for some reason, want this guy back.
Yikes. Even if you are sincere, doing this sort of thing to "punish" somebody only suggest you probably have some personal growing to do. It's concerning.
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[–]Made_you_read_penis 3 points4 points5 points  (0 children)
... I think you seriously have some issues and need some attention.
Seriously, I know this is just the internet, but I can't understand how someone does this. I don't believe that either posts are real. I think this is someone playing internet fantasy writing so they don't feel so alone, boring, and empty. Figure out why you're doing this.
If this is real, and the real update, yeah, same thing.
If this is real, and this is Jake doing the update, yeah, same thing.
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[–]TokisCodpieceBZZZ 3 points4 points5 points  (0 children)
I wanted to punish him somewhat anonymously.
Aaaand here's where you lost me. How is it anonymous if you knew he would see it, and put enough information that he would know it was you talking about him? I smell bullshit. Either this whole thing was a troll post, or you're Jake.
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[–]plastic_venus 13 points14 points15 points  (0 children)
I exaggerated the problem with the dog in the bedroom
So he only wanted the dog to sort of fuck you? Or is it less of an exaggeration and more of a flat out lie? If it's the latter I look forward to Jake's post on here 'My girlfriend got mad and told the internet I'm trying to rape her with Fido'. Fair warning, OP - you will not come out a winner on that post.
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[–]ZiggyMars 2 points3 points4 points  (0 children)
Goddamn Jake you suck.
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[–]marcythevampirequeen 2 points3 points4 points  (0 children)
Lol ok Jake
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[–]Bluemonkey828282 6 points7 points8 points  (0 children)
Well obviously they decided to get back together and jake said the only way it would work is if she posted this. The whole jealousy thing is clearly bullshit and she's just saying it cause she knows it's what he wants to hear. After reading the full story my guess is that jake did infact make the joke at somepoint but did not to it continuously so he was embarrassed when people on reddit started attacking him.
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[–]SweetToes 3 points4 points5 points  (0 children)
Moving back near Jake was stressful because it made me jealous.
What? This doesn't make any sense to me.
Girl, if it's really you, it seems you got back with him for obscure reasons... With all the drama that we saw, I'm sure this relationship isn't healthy. Get out.
Jake, if you somehow tool control of this account, it shows everyone here that you're weak and incapable of facing your problems in a mature way. Posting a few dozens "Please see update" to the people who responded in the last thread further proves your desperate attempt of damage control. Please move on and... seek some help before damaging another girl.
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[–]cielos525 1 point2 points3 points  (0 children)
Jake??? You dirty snake!
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[–]TehRoot 1 point2 points3 points  (1 child)
I love the split between people defending the gf, people calling bs, and people thinking the gf is a psycho.
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[–]TokisCodpieceBZZZ 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
OP is standing in front of one door, and Jake is standing in front of another. One door leads to a happy, fulfilling relationship. The other leads to you getting fucked by a dog. One person always tells the truth, while the other lies. What question do you ask to lead a doggie cum-free life?
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[–]Discochickens 1 point2 points3 points  (0 children)
nice try, Jake!!! hahahahahahaha you are gross!
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[–]ninonelle 1 point2 points3 points  (0 children)
This is laughably embarrassing. Grow up, Jake.
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[–]thealyssavirus 1 point2 points3 points  (0 children)
Jake, you dirty dog.
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[–]aswecollide 3 points4 points5 points  (0 children)
We are all just pawns in some weird 50 shades of gross sex game you're playing aren't we?
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[–]snorville 2 points3 points4 points  (0 children)
Everyone's a dog on the internet.
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[–]theskipster 2 points3 points4 points  (1 child)
Jake,
I hope you put her up to this and are reading the comments. Run for the fucking hills! You stuck your dick in crazy!
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[–]sthetic 4 points5 points6 points  (0 children)
Is "Crazy" the name of the dog?
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[–]daintyladyfingers 1 point2 points3 points  (0 children)
Welp. That's fucked up.
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[–]iamagainstit 1 point2 points3 points  (0 children)
wow, you are a fucking psychopath.
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[–]fruition_facilitator 1 point2 points3 points  (0 children)
This is why I'm single. I can never figure out these games people sometimes play in relationships.
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[–]Jinknel 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
Well that is messed up, I was hoping for good news for you! This can't be real, who gets that pissed off about ones reddit reputation??? Seriously, wtf??
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[–]stephiej17 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
Jake clearly was a horrible person and you'd be an idiot to go back to an insane child like him. If you think he is wonderful or a caring dog owner you are clearly delusional and should seek help.
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[–]blueclawcrab 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
This is so messed up.
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[–]8thWond3r 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
Suuuuurrreeee. You write a novel of backstory just for the slight chance that it Would somehow Make The Front page and you would get him jealous "anomonously."
Do you not realize how ridiculous this update is? Quit taking us as gullible fools
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[–]catlady420 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
This is a reeeeally creepy post and I'm having trouble believing a word of it....Jake,you found her reddit password didn't you?Found another boundary to leap over.....you're a sick sick man.
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[–]queencharlie 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
Wow. You replied to every comment on the original post asking them to read this update. I'm majorly creeped out and scared for the real OP.
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[–]n2tattoos 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
A lie? On the internet?!?
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[–]Doechi 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
Ha. I love how we're supposed to actually believe this is OP. Obviously Jake. Nice try, asshole.
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[–]OdeeSS 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
Hey, Jake.
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[–]megadeadly 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
Uhm weird
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