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Mansplaining summed up in one image... (s3-ec.buzzfed.com)

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[–]TBXGambit -28 ポイント-27 ポイント-26 ポイント 7 時間前 (19子コメント)

Well since I saw the video in question I have thought about this a lot and watched further videos on both sides of the narrative and honestly my view on this is two sided. there is no question in my mind that cat calling happens i have personally seen it while walking with my female friends and there is not a question as to the fact that it shouldn't be happening.

that said from the other side of things i think there are a lot of issues particularly with the video itself and the way it was edited and this is the hang up for a lot of these guys. there are a few scenes particularly when a guy is just being friendly as in "hello" or "how are you" and that is not cat calling (obviously this depends on the way it is done) for perspective i am a big guy 6'4 and well for lack of a better term i am fat and i get harassed all the time like i cant even walk the half block to the corner store without being insulted or having stuff yelled at me. that said i grew up in a small town where everyone knows everyone and i grew up being taught to polite, opening doors for people, greeted pretty much everyone and since moving to the city i still do this i say hi to pretty much anyone who looks at me. man, woman, old, young, pretty or not it doesn't really matter its part of being nice to the people around you and i do feel like there are a few parts of the video where exactly this is happening and they are blanketing it as harassment and it really shouldn't be.

there was one particular part of the video that bothered me. the part where the fellow is walking beside her. from what they showed he was not checking her out. he was not talking or anything and keeping in mind this is a well populated street i think this is just paranoia. now when i am walking down the street i walk my own pace i don't care if someone is walking beside me or in front of me or behind me i am doing my own thing and personally i have experienced walking at night and seeing a girl in front of me speed up and obviously freaking out because i was walking the same way. as a guy what the heck am i supposed to do in this situation? stop and let her get far ahead? like that just as well be confirming her worries. do i call out to her "oh hey i am not gonna rape you or anything" that would be rightfully seen as insane. Too many women get freaked out by this and honestly it literally the same thing as clutching your purse when the black guy gets on your elevator... we notice this stuff and it honestly its insulting and upsetting... your paranoia is not me harassing you...

[–]foreverburning 35 ポイント36 ポイント37 ポイント 7 時間前 (15子コメント)

[+]TBXGambit スコアが基準値未満のコメント-33 ポイント-32 ポイント-31 ポイント 7 時間前* (14子コメント)

[–]iamawesomesauc3 22 ポイント23 ポイント24 ポイント 7 時間前 (12子コメント)

[+]TBXGambit スコアが基準値未満のコメント-28 ポイント-27 ポイント-26 ポイント 6 時間前* (11子コメント)

I don't know that I agree. I mean he didn't say a word to her and from the video we see he looked at her 2 or 3 times in 5 minutes. that's hardly incriminating don't get me wrong i understand there are cases where guys do follow women like this, but speaking from real world experience me just walking home from work at my own pace i have ended up walking beside people like this for 5 and even 10 minutes just because we are going the same speed and the same direction. Honestly I am wondering what you expect guy should do in this situation, because I don't believe women should have to live with this kind of fear, that being said I don't know if I agree with the idea that a man should be expected to treat a woman a particular way JUST because of her gender either and I don't think we should be so quick to label men as Rapists or molesters for something as silly as walking down the street.

[–]marla555-0134 16 ポイント17 ポイント18 ポイント 4 時間前 (9子コメント)

[+]TBXGambit スコアが基準値未満のコメント-16 ポイント-15 ポイント-14 ポイント 3 時間前 (8子コメント)

I can understand that. if you speed up and he speeds up to match then there's something going on. what I am trying to get at is more often than not these situations are innocent. if someone is following you and trying to keep up with you then you should totally be worried and get out/get help.

there is an ever growing hysteria around this idea that men are rapists and that you should treat men like a loaded gun because you cant tell who is or isn't a rapist and honestly that isn't going to make things better for anyone and to many people are taking this video to extremes to the point that even saying hello to someone as you walk past is all of a sudden a sexist act or is some way harassment. most men who greet you are not trying to pick you up. most men who walk past you (or alongside you) on the street are not measuring you up. I firmly believe no woman should feel like they have to look over their shoulder every two minutes and no man should have to feel like he is making someone afraid just by being nearby. we should as a whole strive for better than that.

[–]marla555-0134 4 ポイント5 ポイント6 ポイント 3 時間前 (2子コメント)

I understand your point, but the fact of the matter is that nearly all women have been (most likely several times) harassed on the street, either verbally or physically. And because of this you are naturally more suspicious of men on the street. I myself agree in that there is a bit of hysteria around this, but it is completely understandable. I've experienced cat-calling, groping and being followed and because of this I am very suspicious of friendlier men out on the street. This whole street harassment thing is a case of a small group of the male population giving the rest a bad reputation.

But it isn't the womens fault, I mean if you get punched in the face by a guy when you're out and about, of course you're gonna be more nervous of this happening again, in comparison to before. That is just how humans work, because we want to avoid these things happening to us again.

[–]TBXGambit -4 ポイント-3 ポイント-2 ポイント 3 時間前 (1子コメント)

you are absolutely right and I am terribly sorry if I came off as implying that it was the woman's fault because I definitely did NOT mean it that way writing is not my best skill and you are absolutely correct that it is a small group giving the rest of us a bad reputation. like I am a friendly guy most of my female friends liken me to a teddy bear I hold the door open for anyone man woman or child i will say hello to anyone who looks at me and almost every time people will smile and to be clear I am definitely not saying to not be wary of strangers acting weird or following you. you absolutely need to look out for yourself because yes there are people out there that will hurt you. I just don't think treating someone who is walking past or greets your as a criminal is the way to do it. as for the abuse i can identify with that. Personally i stopped going to bars and larger get together's after being groped (unwanted) for a 3rd time (twice by women and once by a man) and with the harassment i personally experience on a regular basis just because i am a bigger guy I understand it perhaps better than most guys. my biggest concern here is that if we start judging the many by the actions of the few we end up making things much worse rather than better.

[–]marymurrahxx <3s xx 0 ポイント1 ポイント2 ポイント 2 時間前 (0子コメント)

[–]sharshenkaclassy as fuck 5 ポイント6 ポイント7 ポイント 2 時間前 (1子コメント)

[–]TBXGambit 0 ポイント1 ポイント2 ポイント 1 時間前* (0子コメント)

[–]I_will_really_really 4 ポイント5 ポイント6 ポイント 3 時間前 (1子コメント)

[–]TBXGambit -2 ポイント-1 ポイント0 ポイント 2 時間前 (0子コメント)

[–]Brannagain 0 ポイント1 ポイント2 ポイント 29 分前 (0子コメント)

As a 6'2", 300 lb teddy bear, I can relate to your points. I have knee injuries and walk slowly as a result. Often times i get caught in the, "walking the same speed" issue. Inevitably, the other person speeds up and I slow down, so we are no longer in each others personal space.

What made my skin crawl was that he seemed to keep changing his pace to match hers, continually in her personal space. It reminded me of a lion stalking prey. That being said, this video could have been edited in a manner to give that effect.

Another point in which I agree is that I believe some of those people were actually being sincere, just had weak game. Others i felt were people that were clearly pan-handling. Including these people in the video and equating them to those that are stalking prey obfuscates the point. There were plenty examples of harassment, I would have rathered a more in-depth view on these individuals. The fore mentioned groups could have been included to show that not all public interactions are nefarious in intent.

[–]AmbystomaMexicanum 4 ポイント5 ポイント6 ポイント 1 時間前 (0子コメント)

[–]foreverburning 9 ポイント10 ポイント11 ポイント 1 時間前 (0子コメント)

[–]DerNeueGott 13 ポイント14 ポイント15 ポイント 2 時間前 (2子コメント)

[+]TBXGambit スコアが基準値未満のコメント-10 ポイント-9 ポイント-8 ポイント 2 時間前 (1子コメント)

[–]DerNeueGott 1 ポイント2 ポイント3 ポイント 47 分前 (0子コメント)

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