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Apparently my epic meat monstrosity mandwiches weren't fancy enough for /r/food. Maybe you guys will appreciate their raw power! (imgur.com)

submitted by Gregjoe88

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[–]slightly_inaccurate 1220 ポイント1221 ポイント

I think /r/food didn't give you a lot of love because this is a Shooter Sandwich, which has been done ad hominem nauseum (thanks /u/Blackborealis) on reddit.

In addition, there's a few more things that look gross here, even for a meat mountain.

  1. You used maple syrup to marinate your steak. There's nothing wrong with crusting in a little brown sugar with a spice rub on steaks, but to make maple syrup the only flavoring is kind of doing the meat a injustice.

  2. You used tomato sauce with sweet. Sweets and acids go together okay, but not ideal for a savory sandwich.

  3. You added more brown sugar to your caramelized onions. All you have to do to caramelize onions is let them cook down. Those probably didn't taste very good.

  4. You then added gravy which clashes with tomato sauce and the BBQ chicken.

I think ideally you want to have every flavor complimenting each other in big sandwiches like this. I would have nix'd the tomato sauce and the maple syrup and instead used something to compliment the briny flavor of your halloumi and saltiness of the bacon. I suppose the tomato sauce would help cut the fatiness of the sandwich, though.

Regardless, the point is that this is just a shooter sandwich which has been posted 20 times over. It's no longer unique and no longer packs the wow factor to impress people and get upvotes in /r/food.

[–]DrMuffinPHD 194 ポイント195 ポイント

Exactly. Shooter Sandwiches get posted to /r/food every day. We're sick of that shit unless it's doing something mind blowing and new, none of which this abomination to sandwiches was.

[–]Team_Braniel 132 ポイント133 ポイント

Worst shooter sammich I've ever seen.

Its like someone's kid brother was allowed into the kitchen and they just started grabbing shit.

[–]Bel_Marmaduk 50 ポイント51 ポイント

It wasn't even weighted down long enough. The sandwich is maybe a quarter of an inch smaller than it was. And I bet those cold french fries taste fucking gross.

[–]dogdashdash 8 ポイント9 ポイント

Seriously when I made one I put like 200 pounds on it for like 16 hours. It looks like 20 pounds of rocks in a bucket here or something.

[–]TheTuqueDuke 3 ポイント4 ポイント

How did you keep it out of the danger zone? Even though it's all cooked, 16 hours at room temperature is still going to start causing bacterial growth. I wouldn't trust steak that's been sitting on the counter for 16 hours.

[–]dogdashdash 0 ポイント1 ポイント

Might not have been 16 hours, pretty sure it was atleast 6-7, maybe 12? Haven't made one in quite some time. I did it in my basement which is pretty cold, that might've helped. Sometimes you just gotta take a risk!

I also refrigerated it after and heated it up to crisp it in the oven.

[–]TheTuqueDuke 1 ポイント2 ポイント

Ah okay. If you heated it up again after is be okay with that. But they are worth the risk

[–]apathy_thrills 0 ポイント1 ポイント

yea, really didnt understand the french fry inclusion.

[–]TrebeksUpperLIp 7 ポイント8 ポイント

Epic Meal Time has more synergy with their flavors than OP. And that's saying something.

[–]pdcopeland727 [score hidden]

OP forgot the bacon weave. And how to make good tasting food.

[–]Goof1620 [score hidden]

Well you have to give it up for the Epic Meal Time guys- to drink that much Jack Daniels and not injure yourself in any way is almost a talent in its own right...

[–]tmarkville 4 ポイント5 ポイント

I feel like calling what OP made a sandwich is an insult even to Arby's "sandwiches".

[–]threestardot 1 ポイント2 ポイント

Eating an Arby's sandwich right now, concur.

[–]bruddahmacnut 2 ポイント3 ポイント

Am an Arby sandwich. Someone is eating me right now. Fucking ow.

[–]acexprt 3 ポイント4 ポイント

Also I'm sick of people posting food to /r/food. We need variety like cats or even cars.

[–]Ran4 0 ポイント1 ポイント

...but I still see shooter sandwiches with more than 1000 points on /r/food every few weeks. So clearly, for some fucked up reason, /r/food is still not tired of shooters.

[–]HexKrak 51 ポイント52 ポイント

Wow, you nailed exactly what I wanted to say and more.

I worked at a restaurant that added sugar when carmelizing their onions. Boy were they surprised when I showed them how to do it right. To my surprise, they refused to change their "recipe" anyway...

[–]Bel_Marmaduk 0 ポイント1 ポイント

Plenty of restaurants add a little sugar to onions to get them to caramelize faster. Gordon Ramsay's done it in his cookery series as well as on the F Word. I don't really see the problem - you can do it the hard, painstaking way or you can do it the easy way at a very marginal decrease in quality if you do it right. You shouldn't be piling it on like the OP did, of course, but a sprinkle is fine. I usually put a teaspoon or two in my onions.

[–]sloge 3 ポイント4 ポイント

What's hard or painstaking about caramelizing onions? Just put them in a pan and walk away. It takes some time, but it's pretty darn easy. If you're crunched for time there are a few tricks to do it quicker (including this one), but it's no extra effort just to let them cook longer.

[–]Bel_Marmaduk 1 ポイント2 ポイント

You should never walk away from a pan on the stove, least of all a pan full of onions you're caramelizing. I think what you're thinking of is how to make burnt onions, which is quite easy I totally agree.

[–]sloge 2 ポイント3 ポイント

k

[–]LVOgre 1 ポイント2 ポイント

I understood what you were talking about, sloge. You're right, it's stupid easy, just takes time.

[–]PleaseNoSpoiler 118 ポイント119 ポイント

Also... If it doesn't do well in the subreddit it BELONGS in, please don't litter another subreddit with what has been decided is junk. These are not interesting pictures, and it doesn't look like good food either.

[–]YoungSerious 32 ポイント33 ポイント

It's like saying "People who know about this kind of thing called me out, so I took it somewhere people were less educated so I could prey on them instead."

[–]Forgot_Username 11 ポイント12 ポイント

Yet here it is with enough upvotes to have crept to the top of my subreddits. Reddit is an odd place.

[–]Karfedix_of_Pain 82 ポイント83 ポイント

You added more brown sugar to your caramelized onions.

Why would you do this?!

[–]GreenStrong 25 ポイント26 ポイント

Almost all packaged food contains sugar, even in dishes that don't need it at all. People's palates become accustomed to excessively sweet flavors. If you don't eat sugar in every single dish you consume, properly caramelized onions will taste very sweet, adding sugar would make them cloyingly sweet.

[–]Karfedix_of_Pain 38 ポイント39 ポイント

properly caramelized onions will taste very sweet

Not just sweet, but nuanced.

Hitting them with brown sugar will just obliterate any hint of actual onion flavor. If you're doing that, just skip the onions and throw some straight-up caramel sauce on the sandwich.

[–]ruacomic 3 ポイント4 ポイント

How about some maple syrup?

[–]prozacandcoffee [score hidden]

Sure, but don't forget the extra maple syrup, too.

[–]imbignate 1 ポイント2 ポイント

I think he confused "caramelized onions" and "caramel onions".

[–]iammatt00 [score hidden]

Besides the point described as flavor it also makes the caramelizing process much shorter. Regardless, when I saw the maple syrup as marinate I cringed, when I saw OP caramelizing onions with brown sugar it was over. =(

[–]sometimesalways 55 ポイント56 ポイント

Did you mean Ad Nauseum ?

[–]Jaunt_of_your_Loins 36 ポイント37 ポイント

Ad Nauseous.

[–]Goullet 0 ポイント1 ポイント

Agnostic

[–]Knaprig 8 ポイント9 ポイント

That's not the correct spelling, which I've learned from this card.

[–]DiamondAge 1 ポイント2 ポイント

well, his user name is "slightly_inaccurate"

[–]Ghsac 6 ポイント7 ポイント

I didn't know they were called shooters but yeah the loaf of bread filled with meet thing has been done to death on /r/food. It is getting pretty annoying. Try something new if you want that precious karma.

[–]Atworkwasalreadytake 12 ポイント13 ポイント

To be fair on the maple syrup front, those steaks were pretty shitty, almost no marbling, so you can' really ruin them.

[–]tmarkville 8 ポイント9 ポイント

They were perfect for putting into a shitty sandwich though. Provably the only good choice OP made.

[–]Blackborealis 12 ポイント13 ポイント

ad hominem

Which has been done to the man???

I think you mean ad nauseam or ad infinitum

[–]Choralone 6 ポイント7 ポイント

Does /u/slightly_inaccurate even Latin?

[–]therearesomewhocallm 4 ポイント5 ポイント

Kind of suits the username though.

[–]Knaprig 0 ポイント1 ポイント

ad nauseam*

[–]Blackborealis 0 ポイント1 ポイント

Thanks

[–]TheSteamingPile 3 ポイント4 ポイント

With your removals, add in picked onion and I think you'd have one heck of a sandwich there.

[–]johnnybigboi 10 ポイント11 ポイント

I think /r/food[1] didn't give you a lot of love because this is a Shooter Sandwich, which has been done ad hominem on reddit.

I think you mean ad infinitum.

[–]corpsefire 19 ポイント20 ポイント

nah, ad nauseum (to the point of being done-with-this-shit, rough translation)

[–]johnnybigboi 4 ポイント5 ポイント

Right you are.

[–]TheMerovingian 2 ポイント3 ポイント

5. He crowded the mushrooms. It doesn't taste even close as good as when they're properly browned. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cSMN_gq_20Y)

[–]Gorgoz 2 ポイント3 ポイント

I cringed when I saw that he thought caramelizing onions meant cooking them in sugar and attempting to make a caramel sauce. The ironic part is the onions look white, and are not actually caramelized at all.

[–]NameIdeas 2 ポイント3 ポイント

I feel like he's trying too hard to Canada.

He's got maple syrup, Canadian bacon, cheese curds, gravy, fries (poutine).

If he would have left it as simply steak, onions, mushrooms, cheese, that might not be too bad. Perhaps a little too one-dimensional, but not bad. Add some green/red veggies to it as we'd be talking.

*Spoken as a guy who has never made a shooter sandwich.

[–]Kitten_mutilator 0 ポイント1 ポイント

Great feedback!

[–]RocktimusCrime 0 ポイント1 ポイント

Chef John's Shooter Sandwich

[–]bitteralex 0 ポイント1 ポイント

Oh man, you hit the nail on the head here. Especially about the flavour of the ingredients complimenting each other. I see these posts all the time and all they do is add all kinds of meat and as much as they can to the sandwiches. That doesn't make it better, it just makes it more. Also, as a Canadian, I love maple syrup- however, as an Albertan, the fact that op marinated steak in maple syrup angers me. That is an affront to all meat eaters everywhere.

[–]YHZ -1 ポイント0 ポイント

but to make maple syrup the only flavoring is kind of doing the meat a injustice.

That kind of talk will get you beat up in Canada.

[–]Gurip 0 ポイント1 ポイント

so there are no spices? wtf?

[–]l35l13 0 ポイント1 ポイント

Besides the issues already posted, I also saw a problem with not trimming the fat on the steaks. Who wants to take a bite that consists of a huge chunk of fat?

I'd recommend trimming after grilling and not before - a bit of crispy fat is okay, but a chunk of uncooked fat is gross.

[–]azdog 0 ポイント1 ポイント

OMG lay down that sweet sweet food justice!

[–]Matt081 [score hidden]

I think it is a downvote due to that "bacon."

[–]EvanRWT [score hidden]

You forgot to mention the fries. Shooter's sandwiches are eaten at room temperature, and if there's anything worse than dried out compressed room temperature fries, I dunno what it is.

That is a horrible sandwich and a waste of ingredients.

[–]shwanman -1 ポイント0 ポイント

*ad nauseam

[–]Doxep 0 ポイント1 ポイント

It's "ad nauseam" not "ad nauseum".

[–]SpiceyDave 1 ポイント2 ポイント

Alright hermione we get it.

[–]MikoSquiz -2 ポイント-1 ポイント

All that said and correct, I would still eat the hell out of this sandwich. I'm not that picky.

I don't believe in layering chips/fries into stuff, though. The whole point of them is to be crispy on the surface and fluffy on the inside, and when they get soggy they're neither. You might as well just put mashed potato.

[–]slightly_inaccurate 4 ポイント5 ポイント

No doubt, I'd destroy that thing. I give no shits about flavor combinations if I'm looking to put myself in a food coma. I just took offense to the dude's title, like as if the reason his post failed in /r/food was because their subscribers were too uptight to upvote him.

[–]Sarcastastic -1 ポイント0 ポイント

Your suggestion sounds way more up my alley. I'm coming to your house for lunch instead of OP's.

[–]mikemcg -1 ポイント0 ポイント

Overall I agree, but:

You used maple syrup to marinate your steak. There's nothing wrong with crusting in a little brown sugar with a spice rub on steaks, but to make maple syrup the only flavoring is kind of doing the meat a injustice.

Is kind of a pointless critique because isn't this mostly preference, right? What's wrong with maple marinaded meat?

[–]acexprt -2 ポイント-1 ポイント

You don't know my tastebuds bitch!

[–]pedroelbee[🍰] -2 ポイント-1 ポイント

Rekd