Hello, my fellow social justice haters. Let me regale you of the first tale of many regarding social justice warriors who have roamed into my life. And these are the kind of warriors whose egos are so inflated, they do their own colonoscopies with how far their head's up their ass. Let me introduce the cast.
KGBPro- Me. Narrator and witness to these events.
WarHammer- My awesome girlfriend of strong personality.
LSP- A hamplanet who is the living incarnate of Lumpy Space Princess from Adventure Time.
Selfie- A man whose ego matches that of Kanye West.
SpecialSnowflake- Girlfriend to Selfie. A spoiled brat who allows her opinion to be easily swayed to anyone in her favor.
Squilliam- Friend to LSP, Selfie and Snow. He hates everyone except the just mentioned and he spites everyone in his presence in the comfort of his mind.
TheOG- A true friend to all who approach him.
Now that the cast has been introduced, the curtains are rising and so it begins.
We were sitting around and discussing the qualities of the new Disney movie "Frozen".
Selfie:"I don't think Disney has any qualities that influence the public in a positive manner in their media department. I mean, all they've been doing is white-washing fairy tales and characters and lumping people of color together. Their best attempt was with 'Princess and the Frog' and we all know how much of a failure that was."
SnowFlake & LSP:"Yeah, they have very little consideration for other cultures."
WarHammer:"Excuse me, but I don't think that's true. I think they have great consideration towards cultures. Maybe in the past, they screwed up yeah, but that was decades ago and cultural sensitivity wasn't much of a thing back then. But now, they've been making up for it by introducing foreign fairytales and keeping faithful to the origin of their culture and timeline. For example, 'Brave' is Scottish, 'Tangled' is German and 'Frozen' is Scandinavian. The character's appearances are portrayed accurately to their place and time of origin, to change any detail of that would be considered culturally insensitive in itself."
Selfie:"I'm going to have to disagree there. I think it's culturally insensitive to waste an opportunity to interpret and project a story in such a manner that would open doors to consume media and cultures that differ from the predetermined norm. I think Disney, and I'm not excluding other companies from this, cater to the majority of white people rather than the minorities, in order to gain profit."
WarHammer:"It's Disney! They gain enough profit as it is, do you really think they need anymore? And catering to the majority? Don't you think that's racist? You're lumping all white people together the same way you say they lump people of color together. A person can be white, but still be from a different culture!"
Snowflake:"No, I think he's right. The media is catered to the majority of white people in an effort to americanize foreign cultures, for everyone to see that 'America' is the greatest thing that there is in the world when it obviously isn't if it's doing something this low."
At this point, Everybody else in the room, with the exception of WarHammer and I, were nodding in agreement to this. I stepped in.
Me:"Snowflake, you're white, right?"
Snowflake:"No, I'm not. I'm X-culture."
Me:"But, you're paler than the moon on a cold winter night."
Snowflake:"Yes, your point?"
Me:"My point is, your skin color is white enough that if no one knew you or anything about you, everybody would assume at first glance that you're american or european. You could literally pass off as being from a lot of countries, because of the way you look."
Snowflake clearly getting angry at my argument:"But, I'm not! I identify myself as X-culture, not because I'm white!"
Me:"That's exactly my point."
Snowflake:"That's not the same!"
WarHammer:"It's exactly the same! What you're saying is that you'd rather be recognized by where you're from, rather than your skin color and you guys are arguing for the opposite!"
Squilliam grimacing at the whole of our conversation looks at us and says distastefully:"Your argument is collapsing in on itself. None of your points accurately defend the act of white-washing in the media."
WarHammer and I exchange perplexed looks.
WarHammer:"Do you buy the shit that's coming out of your own mouth? Do you subscribe to your own ignorance?"
At this point, everybody stands up and walks away from the table. We decided to drop it, because apparently nobody can accept opinions differing from their own.
A couple of days later, WarHammer and I were applying for internship in relation to the american government and in the application form, they asked to check off any ethnicity that applies. It was interesting when we found that "Caucasian" and "White" were two separate categories. "Caucasian" being american or canadian descent and "White" being of any cultural descent in relation to Western Europe all the way to the Middle East.
WarHammer seized the opportunity and posted a Facebook status saying: "Under the legislation of the american government, 'White' is considered any person of these European and so on heritages. Hmm, I wonder how culturally insensitive that is?"
About an hour later, TheOG messages her on Facebook.
TheOG:"WarHammer, what did you do?"
WarHammer:"I don't know? You tell me, what did I do?"
TheOG:"I don't want to throw any names around, but people are going around calling you a white supremacist."
This threw her off and she double checked and surely enough, LSP and Squilliam unfriended her on Facebook. Not that hard to pin which "people" were those. How it makes sense to a bunch of "intellectual" dipshits that a "white supremacist" would go to a foreign country and date a person of that country(me) beats us. But, they harassed WarHammer by anonymously posting on her other social media profiles rants about her white supremacy and they tried to ruin her reputation with her friends by telling them how she repressed them and how much of a racist she is. They tried to ruin her social life just because she had a different opinion.
TL;DR: "People of Color" try to ruin a girl's social life, just because she has a different opinion.
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