So it was officially announced today, Stephen Colbert is taking over for David Letterman in 2015. Wait. Wait a goddamn second. What?! A white middle-aged straight white dude with a white male penis is gonna be on late night television? CBS wants to pull laugh jizz right outta your comedy boner hole with the same point of view it’s been doling out for over 60 years? Guys, that is just crazy shocking news!
The Colbert choice is being celebrated by comedy lovers (and creators) all over my social media feeds: “I love Colbert!” “Yes! Couldn’t happen to a nicer guy!” And I’m here vacillating between disappointment & boredom. Do I think Colbert is talented? Sure. And I’ve heard he’s a great guy. OK. Am I excited by what he’s doing? Ehh. But even if he were more my comedic cup of tea, he’s still a “safe” choice for the Letterman slot.
I’m sure this replacement decision has been in the works amongst Dave & the network suits for awhile. Was this week’s talk of a female replacement mere dreamy speculation, or were any women actually considered/talked to/coveted? I’d LOVE to know. Because even though I doubted it could happen anytime soon, a part of me believed a funny woman could be chosen. And I could one day write on a team for that funny woman. And take over for her at some point, whilst wearing fierce, flattering dresses and comfortable wedge sneakers.
Comedy is a long, hard road and I’m sure Colbert had his struggles. Those shitty late night gigs, the years of “Sorry, we’ve decided to go in another direction.” Maybe he ordered a few grad school pamphlets, for “curiosity’s sake.” I don’t expect Colbert to turn down this awesome job, or to detract from his own deservedness with a humble speech in which he acknowledges the assistance of his white, male privilege. I don’t expect it, but I would appreciate it.
I’m sick of engaging in the “Are Women Funny?” debate. We are. Many of us are. And I hope the myriad of perspectives – from women, LGBT, & races other than Caucasian – can someday be represented on the forefront of late night television, in front of the lens & not only behind the scenes in small, writer’s- room quantities.
I grew up memorizing Letterman’s Top Ten Lists and I hope he had at least some women on his list of replacements. Boredom and frustration aside, this decision is pushing me on in creating the content I want to see. And will make me more consciously consume the content I want to see from others. So thanks for the reminders, CBS! You predictable mayors of White Male Boring Town, U.S.A…