Thanks to my beta Mei Tosha. I posted this story before but at that time it wasn't betaed and then I also thought it needed to be edited.

The first time that happens... well, how to explain it with mere words? The first time that happens, it’s almost dawn and you are lying on your stomach.

Yes, the first time that happens it's almost dawn and everything around you is quiet and still, like someone is holding his breath. Like someone is patiently waiting for something to happen, for you to move. To react.

I don’t want anything from you. I don’t wanna know you because I had time to find out what you truly were. What you were all about. Don’t make my heart race with you walking closer to me. You always had my heart... you just don’t know – yet – it.

Outside, it's still dark, the kind of damp darkness that you don't know how describe. This warm and humid night’s air which is making you lightly sweat and the wet coarse asphalt is sticky with yellowish dead leaves glued to it.

No shadows are on the ground as you are left almost breathless, lying completely naked with only a sheet covering your lower back. A blend of flax and cotton which is letting show through, your pale and tattooed skin.

Your voice is on the air... It doesn’t mean shit to me. Just wanna make it clear... Liar!

Absently with your right hand you grab the pillow next to you, pulling it against your chest. You hiss at the sudden contact of cool fabric against your warm skin but you keep your eyes closed. More or less pretending to be able to fall asleep with this kind of simple comforting gesture.

Close your eyes and sleep Chester! And you just don’t astound me because I’m not even interested and this madness must now cease.

After few minutes – which seems like eternity to you – you exhale, finally opening your eyes. Giving up in sleeping. Shifting between cool sheets, you start to think that maybe it’s only you having issues in sleeping in a room that isn't yours.

You sigh while tiredly massaging your temples, wondering that maybe – after all – you are really becoming allergic to hotel rooms. A strange and uneasy feeling grew, which leaves you looking back at when you could fell asleep anywhere.

Our roads are getting nearer, leading us together. But yet... we cover distances but not together. You look at me but from miles away.

Licking your dry lips you wonder what Mike is doing at this very moment.

Surely sleeping. You idiot!

Slowly you turn toward your nightstand. Moaning, you notice that there's no sign of any bottle of water.

“Fuck!” You hiss, quickly sitting up. “Wide awake and thirsty.” You wonder if the hotel bar is still opened and then ... and then it's when you notice it.

You stare at it for a long moment, lying forgotten on your bed.

“How-” You start to say, slowly reaching for it. It’s silly because it's not something that you’ve never seen before. Probably hundreds of times. It's not something that you’ve never touched and really he always had this kind of vice, leaving or forgetting his stuff around. No, in the end it's not something new to you but tonight is different.

Just stay or forever go. And you will decide if I'm all you've been waiting for because falling in love wasn’t part of my plan. But I will try to accept it, not making it worse, because I know I might lose you by taking the chance. But deep down inside me I know that you were meant to be mine. And I ... Yours.

You don't know how to explain what you are feeling. You don’t know what your mind is thinking now. But you are holding his t-shirt between your hands with a strange and indefinite sensation creeping upon you.

“Mike.” You whisper like enchanted, feeling the thin cotton fabric so light between your fingers.

It’s the one with that little, almost faded alien print who he was wearing this afternoon. You muse staring intently at it, not really remembering how and above all when he decided to undress himself, leaving his t-shirt here, in your room. On your bed.

With the very tip of your finger, you touch the little print while wondering how the fuck his t-shirt ended up on your bed.

Make this moment matter more and show me, like you did before, which place in your life I was given.

Noticing a little hole on the collar of his t-shirt, you lean closer to stare at it and yes ... yes, it happens very fast. You don’t even care to stop yourself from going further. No, you don’t even care to mull over what you are doing because next you find his t-shirt pressed against your face, while breathing in his scent. In his unmistakable scent.

You've got a hold on me ... and you don’t even know it. Your ingenuity is driving me to my knees. What have you done to me? Nor I do even know what you truly want from me. Well I'm not holding back this love of mine, anymore.

Moaning. Closing your eyes with a forceful tide washing over you. Something powerful and intensely physical leaving you breathless, making you slump into the mattress with his t-shirt tightly pressed against your chest.

A whimper is escaping from your lips while letting his t-shirt slide down ... slowly down, towards your belly. Your crotch and you snap open your eyes while chewing hard on your bottom lip.

What am I doing? You are devouring me so slowly. I'm searching for you but you're not here. I'm looking for you but you're not near.

It’s like pure liquid desire dancing in you, filling you. It’s like suddenly you are no more able to pretend that you don't want more. And this tension of yours needs to be washed away.

Wet sounds of little rain drops which are slowly dripping over the parapet and your breath is coming out more rapid. Maybe you can go to blame this moist sensation of yours which this night is carrying with its. Maybe you shouldn't even give into your needs, into your burning needs that are like long tentacles pulling you underwater. Chilly water closing over you as you are lead down deep into the darkness, liquid desire of yours which makes you crave for more. For him.

“Mike.” You call out his name. But silence is the only one replying to you.

It’s like you are saying it for the first time. It’s like it gained a new meaning or maybe you were only trying to hide, pretending that he wasn't more than a friend to you.

You don't know how to explain it but it’s like you don’t know him anymore as much as you did yesterday. And what you thought you knew about him, what you believed you knew about him, suddenly tumbles down. Bam! Now you can see more, a new mean under each every little gesture of his.

Mike is like a touchstone; his big smile is a reassurance that no matter what he will be always here for you. And when you want to cry and yell he silently offers his shoulder letting you cry out your agony.

He never fails to amaze you with that kind of reverence he seems to have only for you, like you are the only person on this Earth who really matters to him. With him you feel like you are lost and found because you know that if you will fall he will quickly catch you before you will hit the ground.

Because I’ve been loved but I didn’t know how to feel it... what to feel about it. Because I’ve been adored but I don’t know if I ever believed it... nor maybe I cared about it. Because I’ve been wanted but I didn’t know how to take it until you came and made me fall in love with you.

Mike. Your touchstone who left his t-shirt on your bed and suddenly you feel a bit lonely while thinking that he’s just sleeping next to your room. And his t-shirt which he regardless, left here on your bed makes you crave for more.

I’m tired to pretend... tired to desire. Tired to want and not to have. Tired to hide and deny what I truly want from you. All I care about is you and that’s the truth.

It's when you feel your feet coming in contact with the carpet that you realize what you are doing. Chewing hard onto your bottom lip while shaking your head – like doing this will stop you from standing up, from wanting him, Mike – and ... And what? You wonder while Mike's t-shirt is smoothly sliding over your heated torso. While you are putting it on. Gentle worn-out cotton caressing your skin while, with a little smile, you are noticing that it's a bit too big for you.

Outside the corridor is empty as you step out, shivering slightly with the cold air brushing on your half naked skin. Behind your shoulders you can feel the door easily sliding shut and here you are, standing wide awake in the middle of the night. Wandering in an empty corridor, not truly knowing what you want to do once you reach Mike’s bedroom.

You take a deep breath while leaning closer to Mike’s door but the only sound you can hear is the incessant hiss of the silence. Yes, Mike is surely asleep. For a long moment you remain inhibited while guessing what you should do.

Knock or not knock?

Brushing your hand against the thin, soft cotton fabric of his t-shirt, you are thinking that surely you are an idiot because it's very late and you shouldn't be there.

No, you should just stop thinking about Mike in that way but you can't bring yourself to do it. Fuck! It’s been too long and you are tired of waiting. You know that you are risking because you don't know what Mike's reaction will be but you can't either keep going on in this way. With this strange and unease feeling of yours growing up higher and higher, calling for attention.

Now I want it too much and I'm like an addict coming at you for a little more. I never needed anybody like this before and all because you are like a drug.

Taking another deep breath, you knock softly, and then wait while looking around you.

Shit! I’m really an idiot.

Obviously he doesn't wake up. So you knock again, this time a bit harder. Long seconds of waiting without him coming to the door and then you sigh feeling stupid while ready to go back to your room.

“Chester?”

You tense, hearing him calling your name. A half whisper, a low and sleepy voice calling you.

You turn, seeing him. Yes, you see Mike staring at you with a confused expression painted all over his face.

“I... Mike.” You start to babble not knowing what to say and fuck! Your mouth is suddenly dry with you not feeling quietly yourself and all because his eyes are now upon you.

“Come inside.” He says stepping back, disappearing inside his dark bedroom.

“I'm sorry I didn't want to wake you up.” You try to excuse yourself walking after him.

He nods going to sit on the bed. “A nightmare, huh?” He asks yawning and you don't know why but you find yourself helplessly smiling like an idiot.

He chuckles softly. “Ok, I’m here.”

You shake your head while shyly smiling and you are about to say something, when you do realize that he's staring at his t-shirt. Yes, the one you are wearing. So you clear your voice while averting your eyes from him.

“Chester?” He calls you but you don't reply. “Chester, come to sleep.” He then adds after a long moment. Sensing you being somehow awkward around him.

You watch him climb into the bed, pulling the sheets over his body. He smiles softly and sleepy at you. “It’s still early, come to sleep.” He invites you, his eyes still looking at his t-shirt which you are wearing.

“It’s wrong.” You barely whisper.

“What?” He asks sounding confused.

“You ... You left this on my bed.” You say, feeling almost ashamed to reveal it.

He remains for a moment in silence while intently staring at you. “Shhhh... hush Chester.” He smiles softly. His warm hand reaching for your arm, pulling you gently into the bed.

You let your body fall into the bed, between his arms, knowing that he doesn’t want to talk about it.

“It’s warm.” You whisper into the darkness, while he’s pulling the sheets over you. His arms slowly sliding around you. Your back against his chest.

“I was sleeping on that side.” He murmurs, gentle warm air tickling the back of your neck.

There’s a long moment of silence, in which you are left wondering if he fell asleep. You are almost there to close your eyes, too tired and too satisfied to busy yourself in thinking. Then his warm lips place a kiss on your neck.

“Mike.” You moan as your hand goes to cup his nape, softly caressing his short hair.

He doesn’t say anything but tilts your face toward his, kissing you. Yes, kissing you.

It's only a chaste kiss but you find yourself moaning into it while feeling one of his warm hands, sliding under your t-shirt, caressing your rib-cage and then your chest. He pulls away, licking his lips with his hands still caressing your chest.

“Don't stop Mike please.” You whisper against his moist lips turning to face him.

He nods while gently kissing his way to your chin ‘til he reaches – again – your lips.

I'm feeling so small; they said I had a dirty mouth but don’t go on and stop before analysing my behaviour. Now that you know what you know I bet you still don’t understand what you mean to me.

Fluttering eyes as he kisses you again but this time there's no room for a chaste kiss and you open your mouth for more of his tongue. His fingers gripping your slim hips, strikingly pulling you toward him. Deepening the kiss.

“There's no... Ah! No escape from you.” He moans while hastily taking away his t-shirt.

Quickly your mouth finds his dark nipples and he hisses something that you can't understand. You, closing your moist and warm mouth over one of them.

“Do you still think that it's wrong?” He asks breathless while sliding between your spread thighs.

You don’t reply, not truly knowing what to say. He kisses you again and your fingers are between his short hair. You are thinking that it's a strange sensation to have him between your thighs. You can feel his weight, his bones and muscles ... shifting, moving muscles against your inner thighs as he’s rubbing his cock against yours. Making you moan and hiss a series of fucks.

One of his hands goes to slam hard onto the mattress. Him trying to support himself, not wanting to crush you with his weight but your heart is racing as his bottomless eyes are staring into you.

You are like an animal, moving over me. Make me forget my name but don't forget what I told you before ... I knew you were mine for the taking.

“Yes, there’s no escape from me. You are mine to please.” You whisper into his ear, feeling him tense and shiver in pure delight. With your tongue licking and sucking his earlobe.

He nods, starting to pull away from you but you hastily grip his shoulder, preventing him from moving away from your body.

“You know... lube and condom.” He says raising an eyebrow while lazily smiling at you.

Taking one of his hands you start to suck two fingers, saliva quickly making them wet and slick. Wet sounds and your eyes fixed on his. Your warm tongue lazily licking and slicking his fingers and then he pulls them out, a long thread of saliva coming out, attached to them. He breaks it with his finger meanwhile you are spreading more your thighs, exposing your asshole to him. Leaning forward to kiss him while feeling fingers starting to penetrate your asshole.

“Mike.” You call him, gripping his wrist.

“I won’t hurt you.” He says licking his lips but a second finger is penetrating you, making its way inside you. Stretching you more and further as blistering pain is making you sweat and cry out in pain.

“I-I know.” You croak, your fingers still wrapped around his wrist, feeling his hand move and flex. His fingers now buried inside you. Opening you for him.

“Chester.” He calls you pulling out his fingers and with amazement you watch him lick and suck them, moaning softly and you know that no one is more devoted to you but Mike.

I never thought for one second I'd have nothing left but shame but in my lover arms I find relief and I’m waiting to overstep what we built, finally having his last secret. Making it mine, knowing how deeply he loves me.

“Breathe... breathe with me Chester.” He softly whispers, starting to push inside you.

You close your eyes, feeling a burning sensation crawling between layers of your skin and you grip his shoulder blades. You forget about everything. You forget about his t-shirt which you are still wearing, all pulled up, your bare chest exposed to him, devoured by his feverish kisses and painful bites.

Do you really think I'm made of stone baby? Love can really tear you up, breaking you down but let me taste you. Let me have a piece of you. Everything you think you know baby is wrong so now come to find answers in me. You that wants to reach for perfection, me that craves for you to love me back.

“Fuck me raw!” You harshly breathe against his jaw, softly biting it. Wanting to drive him crazy. Quickly wanting to burn all of this intense passion of yours.

He kisses your puffy lips. “I ah! I don't think that you are ready for it.” He says starting to slowly move.

“Don't protect me!” You say in an undertone. “Just fuck me.”

Because I’m your adrenalin which makes you shiver underneath your skin. And did you really think you'd take me by surprise? Look at me now standing here, burning you down.

He moans, speeding up his pushes with you, biting hard onto your bottom lip while burning flames are licking at your sweaty skin. Pain that won’t leave you, blending together with pleasure. Dancing across your skin. Underneath layers of your skin.

“I won’t hurt you.” He pants looking down at you. “But fuck if you are tight!”

“I know.” You half smile, burying your face into the crock of his neck. “More, harder... please!”

I want to feel you. Let me dirty up your mind and see what I can find because I know what's good for you.

He bites hard on your neck, starting to go faster. Deep pushes which leaves you breathless with your asshole stretched around his cock. With his heavy balls slapping your cheeks as he mercilessly fucks you and then ... and then you arch off the bed as he starts to hit your prostate over and over.

“Chester.” He moans gripping your hips to steady himself. “I-I'm about to come.”

The bed is squeaking under your weight, sweat making you slippery.

“Mike.” You pant out totally ravished by him and by what he’s doing to you. Spreading your thighs more. Wanting to have him more inside you. “Ah! Mike shit I think I love you.”

He closes his eyes, throwing back his head and then with a hard and deep push he buries himself inside you, spilling his cum into you. Filling you up.

His.

Would I dare confess if you asked that I nurture the urge to be this close to you? To have more of you? Please make me feel like I finally I belong to someone. To you.

You are staring at him. In awe, totally ravished by the sight he’s. And... Oh fuck! You come with jets of semen landing on your stomach. With one of your hands pressed flat against his sweaty chest while riding out your orgasm. Feeling his heart like he’s beating against your bare hand. Into your hand.

And remember that what drives me on can drive me crazy and what you need is what you get from me. All because I love you. All because you left something for me to remember. To crave and want. I want it all ... You are not choking my love. It’s only my love devouring you.

When you open your eyes, you find yourself curled against him while he's looking down at you with a soft smile painted all over his lips. His bedroom eyes intently watching you. Almost, you would dare to say, studying your relaxed features.

“Think?” He asks raising an eyebrow. His fingers fluttering on your chest.

“Hmmm... What?” You ask rubbing your eyes, feeling sore.

“Do you love me or do you think to love me?” He asks, searching answers into your eyes. “Because there's a big difference between-“

“Shhhh. Less talk, more action.” You say kissing him, and you sense him smiling against your lips.

* * *

At breakfast, you are all taken in staring at Dave talking at the phone. Mike slides beside you. Waking you up from your thoughts.

“Soooo Chester.” He begins while sipping a steamy cup of coffee.

You lazily turn to stare at him. “What?” You ask buttering a slice of bread.

“Can I borrow one of your t-shirts?” He asks grinning widely.

You take a spoon of marmalade before to reply. “I’ll leave it later on your bed.” You shrug, while slowly licking some marmalade off of your spoon.