Dancien goes to Hair Fair (Image Intensive)

June 25, 2009 in Announcements/Events, Dancien's Slip Side, Dear Dancien, Wall of Shame by Dancien | 63 comments

Hi folks! Dancien Graves here with another Thursday post. Now, before we start..I would like to thank the hair fair organizers for throwing this together and single-handedly bankrupting most of the fashionistas. I picked up many many new hairs and can’t wait for the next Hair Fair where maybe guys won’t get the shaft as much.

I’m basing these photos on the high ARC of the people in them, but it should be known that ARC does not necessarily contribute to lag. Anything attached to your avatar creates lag, especially in a loaded sim. If you show up to Hair Fair bald, in a top and system pants, sans AO and shoes (which is WHAT THEY TELL YOU TO DO AT THE ENTRANCE, FUCKERS) you’ll be fine. Everything will load quicker for you and you won’t contribute to Lag Soup.

Now then, there were some people at Hair Fair who apparently did not get the memo. You know the one asking you to take off your prims and scripts to make everybody’s experience more enjoyable? Well, I noticed a lot of this people and since I’m a world class photographer (Apparently anybody can call themselves that these days; look a few posts down. Yes, I am looking at you PhotoLife) I decided to take some pictures of them. This post is image intensive and you have been warned twice. SO if you have problems loading it, and complain about it…well you can blow me.

hairfairshame1

Dear Dude’s Name I Did Not Catch,

I caught you out of the corner of my eye and you were the first person I took a picture of at Hair Fair. Yes, I know I forgot to click the show interface button, however I did not want you to think I was going to forget you. You seem to have these orbs around your fair. Is it to highlight the Billy Ray Cyrus like pony tail? To highlight the massive amounts of jewelry you were wearing? Please, I want to know. Also, you seem to have some light near your invisible cock. Is it to highlight the face you have a detachable penis? Were you just going to walk up to some nice lady at Hair Fair and go “OH Hai! I haz Penis!” and then a spot light was going to shine down upon it? No Sir, you fail. You fail hard now go to some store and look up the ladies hairstyles and quick bringing us down.

hairfairshame2 Yeah, I didn’ get your name either. But I remember you. You were standing there for like 20 minutes all primmed out and covered in scripts. Including that cute little hairspray can you doused your fake hair with every 30 seconds. Do you know why I remember you? Because your tag said “Hair Fair Designer”. Way to go champ! Way to help out the place where you’re trying to make some change. Did it help the charity? You standing there dousing your hair? Please, I think we all want to know.

hairfairshame3 Celeste Pinkney. Giant Hair. Ass Spanking Attachments, Redgrave Boots. I don’t know folks….I wanna say she’s a dancer but is that too far of a stretch? Also, she has prim eyelashes. We’ll get to a better example of that later.

hairfairshame4 I flew past this thing three times. I was thinking maybe those were sculpties that did not rez. NO NO SIR THEY WERE NOT! Instead Chelsea Dollinger decided to bring her giant prim tits to the show as well as her clickable cooter. Maybe she was waiting for invisible penis guy?

hairfairshame5 Oh yes, this gentleman. Lumpi Burt. Tennis shoes, flood pants, blingy jewelry, bad maxxed out slider shape, HUGE face light, badly done sunglasses, and a cigarette hanging in his open mouth. Note the shirt says Womanizer. I guess that is a euphemism for “Could not get laid in a female prison with a fist full of pardons”. If the pose looks weird, that is because I caught Lumpi here in the middle of that moronic walking around in circles stand found on some of the popular AO’s. ProTip: Does not make you look cool. Makes you look like you’ve been beaned in the head with something…repeatedly. Dick.

hairfairshame7 Dear Nekos,

Yes right now I am talking to pretty much all of you. Look, we get it you’re cats YAY for you. However, it does not give you the right to fuck up other people’s hair fair experience with your scripted tails, sculpted prim pants, fucked up hair……and boxed tits. Wait…boxed tits? What the fuck were you thinking? Seriously.

hairfairshame6 Hi, my name is Junko Haiku tee hee! While I may look all sweet and innocent I am really just a lag inducing monster! But you know what, fuck the rest of you because I look cute? No? Here, let me throw on these few scripted prims….do I like cute now? Oh wait, you crashed. Tee Hee

hairfairshame8 Fucking Nekos, I swear to god! I caught this one just coming out of the “If I bend over far enough maybe it’ll fix the wedgie” pose.

hairfairshame9 *points at her shoes* Do those boots have some magical power that suck out IQ Points? Seriously? I want to know. I caught more inconsiderate assholes wearing those exact same shoes than any other type of shoes.

hairfairshame10 Why? Please somebody tell me why? Just one good reason and I may concede to all this bullshit. Here’s the Protip: LADIES! When you’re wearing those ridiculous prim eyelashes in enviroments such as hair fair, you do not look pretty. Instead, you look like a fucking racoon. Just take them off, nobody is going to notice them anyways. Also, it’s the MIDDLE OF THE FUCKING DAY!! Your Face Lights are not required!

hairfairshame11 Roleplayer hmm? I am going to roleplay the fact that you are an asshole! Seriously! *glares at Nekos* Cut it out already, nobody fucking cares what you look like, they’re all busy buying hair!. Wait….is that a cooter light? Should I find Invisible Spotlight Dick Guy for you? You can make fashionably stupid prim babies together with optional Neko tails?

hairfairshame12 I got a brief snapshot of this before I started running. All that mess of prims I didn’t know if it was going to eat me or not. It kinda looked like it wanted to.

hairfairshame13 You know what? You’re the love of my life too. Seriously! I love the way you decided to show everybody via titler than you’re in SL Love and that it’s serious business. I also love the fact you totally primmed out for all of us to completely lag in the glory of love (yeah, I just fucked myself over and will now have that song in my head all day)

hairfairshame14 It’s a Bird! It’s a plane! It’s……LAGGY BUSINESS SUIT BARBIE!!!

hairfairshame15 Because sometimes, we just don’t want to walk around. Instead we’ll load up some flappy wings and fly around. That’s how we roll. With our headphones and giant wings. Yep.

I would have more pictures but I kept crashing so sorry about that. Tune in next week when I deal with a personal issue. Naughty Neva’s, yeah…..I’m looking right at you.

Tags: 2009, Hair Fair, Hair Fair 2009, Wall of Shame

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June 25, 2009 at 10:32 am

Sunshine Kukulcan

1) Who made you the lag police?

2) How many GD times do you ppl have to be told that scripts do NOT lag a sim? Scripts have the lowest priority for runtime in a sim.

3) Although prim rendering can have an impact on lag in a sim, it is NOT what ppl are wearing, but instead LiLa’s server side and YOUR computer which will determine lag time.

4) Invest in a better computer and/or better connection and I assure you lag time will become a thing of the past.

I do realize that these comments won’t make a shit bit of difference to someone who is scrumming for readers, but honestly—your bitching is offbase and out of touch with the reality of the situation.

June 25, 2009 at 10:34 am

Vivianne Draper

i have some pics on my flickr from last year’s hair fair and i even got a reply! lol

June 25, 2009 at 10:36 am

LourdesDenimore

Ok it worked I will be very conscious about what I wear to hair fair.

June 25, 2009 at 10:39 am

Stein

I made him the lag police. I’m the lag governor and I sentence you to fry in the lag chair for being such a humorless turd.

June 25, 2009 at 10:42 am

Dancien

Dear Sunshine,

1: I did

2: Sure. You just keep telling yourself that cupcake.

3: AMD Phenom II X4 920 CPU, 4GB RAM, Nvidia 9800, and a 15MB Download speed. So, I guess your whole new computer bullshit excuse is going to have to lick me where I pee

And you’re right. Your comment won’t make a bit of difference. But not because we’re scrumming for readings. They won’t make a bit of difference because you’re a fucking idiot.

June 25, 2009 at 10:48 am

Aki Shichiroji

” 2) How many GD times do you ppl have to be told that scripts do NOT lag a sim? Scripts have the lowest priority for runtime in a sim. ”

…
HAHAHAHAHAHA you’re joking, right??? Right?

Let’s take one of the older AOs i have on hand for example. it has a script time of .134ms. Multiply that by 50 avs (the maximum that are allowed in the Hair Fair sims). 6.7ms script time total

Mystitool. .271ms. Multiply by 50. 13.55ms script time.

Let’s take a resizable boot. top and bottom, .322ms script time. multiply by 2 for the other foot, multiply by 50. 32ms script time total.

A healthy sim sits at or under 15-20ish ms script time.

You’re saying 50 avs wearing scripted items aren’t going to lag a sim, when they take up 52.25ms script time? well over TWICE the recommended amount?

You’re funny.

BTW - better computer doesn’t necessarily mean lag goes away. your computer might attempt to load things quicker if you have a better video card, but if the server is struggling to deliver you textures and prims to even load? is experiencing extreme time dilation? yeah, you’re not going anywhere fast.

June 25, 2009 at 10:49 am

sp00ky Graves

wow Sunshine, somebody’s grumpy…

shouldn’t blame it on somebody’s PC when you know nothing about it, you end up just looking like you’re talking out of your ass.

June 25, 2009 at 10:54 am

Yenn

a big w00t for Phenom II

June 25, 2009 at 10:55 am

Sunshine Kukulcan

Dancien:

Intel Skulltrail Dual Quad Core X9775 @ 3.20 GHz
3 Nvidia GTX 280’s in SLI
16GB RAM
20Kmbps download speed

Suck on that pal. Oh and Stein, you are the talentless/humorless turd who can only get a laugh at others’ expense.

You can all fuck off and lag forever for all I care.

June 25, 2009 at 10:57 am

Yenn

lmao “I have a better pc than you” fight

cause anyone who doesn’t have 16GB ram and three graphic cards shouldn’t be playing SL

wtg

June 25, 2009 at 11:09 am

moo Money

You’d think all that money spent on a new computer could have bought you a better attitude. It’s a shame such a gorgeous computer was wasted on you, Sunshine.

June 25, 2009 at 11:09 am

Dancien

*gets a little sleepy at the penis flexing by the princess*

Yes yes, you have a giant PC. I’m gonna go find somebody who cares now about how awesome your PC is…….yep…..any minute now…..

Oh wait, we’re supposed to lag forever and fuck off and all that. Yeah, you’re boring now. You are dismissed.

June 25, 2009 at 11:10 am

Dancien

Eh Moo. Noob bought an intel system. She’ll be replacing it before the year is over.

June 25, 2009 at 11:12 am

moo Money

I have an Intel myself, so them’s fighting words!

June 25, 2009 at 11:13 am

sp00ky Graves

if you have to run that much to get SL not to lag for you thats pretty sad. the point is he has plenty to run SL just fine. now you can quit showing us your E-Penis and put it back in your mouth….

June 25, 2009 at 11:14 am

Six

Wow this is the first I am hearing of hair fair this year, I had no idea it was even taking place :S

June 25, 2009 at 11:15 am

Nivaya

So anyway - Yay for this post. Boo for people who lack the common sense or courtesy for this sort of event. And blah for people who don’t see how it’s fun to laugh at such people’s dickish fail.

When I was there, on Saturday, there was this couple, she was a fluffytailed Neko of course, and the guy had her on a particle leash. It was delightful.

June 25, 2009 at 11:22 am

whispers magic

The name “sunshine” is kind of a misnomer for her huh? Awesome post Dancien. I seriously need to look around more at the HF I guess. lol

June 25, 2009 at 11:23 am

hair fair ninja

The best outfit for Hair Fair is an all black freebie skin - I think it’s at Shapes by Zada - you can be totally naked with an arc of 1 and no one can tell

June 25, 2009 at 11:23 am

SySy

ROTFLLMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO @ the pics

June 25, 2009 at 11:24 am

Maegen Parvenu

I want to know what he needs three graphics cards and 16 GB of RAM *for*. I have 4 GB of RAM a 2.33 GHz quad core, and a GeForce 9800 GTX+ and never have lag issues in SL - granted I haven’t been to hair fair since the blogger day so it hasn’t been put through its paces bigtime or anything, but still. SL is the most graphics-and-processing-intensive thing I think I’ve ever tried to run, and I’m a gamer girl, so I’ve no idea what that person is doing with that mega computer. My guess is Door A) Making it up, but it could be B) he needed some e-peen to wave around and a faster computer would allow him to make the most ignorant comments.

June 25, 2009 at 11:26 am

Dancien

I am going to guess making it up. She probably sat there and looked up the biggest most expensive parts

June 25, 2009 at 11:27 am

sp00ky Graves

Maegen 1 Sunshiny Jackass 0

June 25, 2009 at 11:32 am

Delora Starbrook

I have an intel too, but it’s lasted me 6 years and is now going tits-up. But this is also because I know how to take care of my computers. I’m gonna do some hair-fair computer-penis measuring too now! Really! …Okay maybe not, I just woke up and I’m too tired.

Wait what? Six? You didn’t know about hair fair? Aw crap.

June 25, 2009 at 11:39 am

Yenn

Could be fun to visit hair fair with one of those 100k+ AR cost avatars lol

June 25, 2009 at 11:40 am

Winona

My computer is very average, I just turned my preferences down to low on the graphics tab and everything loaded much faster, although the gray stayed for a long time on quite a few of the booths. Seems to me that lag is not necessarily sim wide, but has to do more with what is in your viewing distance, as I noticed the lag was the worse by the TP point of each sim and by the popular booths.

Funny about the walking in circles AO, the first time I saw that one in Second Life was on one of the MADD designers.

Nothing says I am a guy in real life better than prim boobs!

Anyway, I this post was overall funny. Nothing bugs me more than people that are so vain (about their avatars nonetheless) that they can’t go bald and shoeless for even the little bit of time they are at hair fair. You would think someone asked them to shave their real life heads and the ironic part about it is its for a charity that gives sick kids wigs, what does that say when someone refuses to go bald?

June 25, 2009 at 11:42 am

sp00ky Graves

or go with nothing but prim cocks on every single attach point.

June 25, 2009 at 11:43 am

Yenn

I have no prim cocks

June 25, 2009 at 11:45 am

sp00ky Graves

sounds like a personal problem

June 25, 2009 at 11:47 am

Yenn

I can live with it The real thing is better anyway

June 25, 2009 at 11:53 am

sp00ky Graves

I agree, however I’m not about to go trying to attach a bunch of real ones to me….

June 25, 2009 at 11:55 am

Delora Starbrook

I can send anyone who needs prim cocks a giant flexi cock skirt if they really need one?

June 25, 2009 at 11:56 am

Cyclic Gearz

I have a decent computer. I can run Crysis and other such wonderously graphically demanding programs at high specs. Second Life and the many people who think wearing the entire contents of their ACCESSORIES folder render me sluggish and unable to move. Thank fuck I wasn’t one of the people who ignored the polite request from the Hair Fair team, I put on the anti-lag kit they gave out FOR FREE. Yeah, I looked weird, but I was looking at the hair, and I don’t really care if I look like I am made out of white chocolate.

It’s just a matter of being polite, something which a lot of the SL folks seem to have missed out on getting.

June 25, 2009 at 11:57 am

Moneypenny

SpOoky, unlike her name, Sunshine is NEVER a ray of sunshine…

June 25, 2009 at 12:06 pm

Stein

I might be a talentless turd, but I can learn and you’ll still be a twat no matter how AMAZING a computer you have.

June 25, 2009 at 12:10 pm

Niya Nishi

Well, I will say one thing Dancien…… you find the oddest boobs! Boxed ones….Whatever next! lol

June 25, 2009 at 12:12 pm

Colleen

Hey now…don’t you start thinking the noob nekos stand for all of us. The cool nekos have detachable ears and tails for heavily lagged sims tyvm.

June 25, 2009 at 12:15 pm

Dancien

Oh yes, by the way GoGo (Since I know you’re foaming at your little Aryan Barbie Mouth while reading this) blocking me from your plurk when I call you on doing the exact same thing just proves that I’m right and you’re just a miserable hypocrite.

June 25, 2009 at 12:16 pm

Ayesha Lytton

I got hassled at Hair Fair for wearing a simple prim skirt and a pair of boots. I ignored the people but it was still annoying. The next day, I read http://analutetia.com/blog/anatomy-of-lag/ and returned to the fair, primmed to the nines and using the Snowglobe viewer. Everything loaded 10x as fast - that viewer rocks. Sadly, no one said a word to me, but if they had I’d have sent them the link and told them to put that in their pipe and smoke it. People really need to 1) mind their own business, and 2) if they MUST intrude on someone else’s, actually know what they are talking about.

BTW I have a GeForce 6800 which I’ve been told is an old graphics card. My computer itself is getting outdated as well. Yet, with Snowglobe I could see everything, and move around pretty well with graphics set at High and draw distance at 128.

June 25, 2009 at 12:24 pm

SySy

boob pic rocks. period LMAO

June 25, 2009 at 12:26 pm

Anastasia Trefusis

I don’t get how people go around saying ARC is a myth and all this stuff was fixed by LL back in 05 etc. Seriously? Are they playing the same game I am, the one where my frame rate drops through the floor when some
blinged out prim ho comes by?

June 25, 2009 at 12:35 pm

Tristan Micheline

Dancien… great frigging post. very funny. awesome pics and comments..

Sunshine…about the pc size thing.. maybe the bragging is to make up for a lack of something else ? hmmmm

Delora, could I please have a copy of the flexi penis skirt? it shoudl go great with my flexi penis wings.. lol

June 25, 2009 at 12:48 pm

Sunshine Kukulcan

Read and learn kiddies:

http://www.massively.com/2008/09/29/massivelys-guide-to-reducing-your-second-life-lag/

http://wiki.secondlife.com/wiki/Help:Lag

http://gwynethllewelyn.net/2008/02/16/lag-myths-dispelled/

June 25, 2009 at 12:59 pm

staceybee

Oh Dancien–that was the funniest thing I have read lately LOVE the prim boobie pic.

June 25, 2009 at 1:10 pm

Ann Otoole

ARC Naziism is like a disease. And LL started it and the ARC Nazis will have nothing to do with the truth.

Read. Learn. Educate: http://analutetia.com/blog/anatomy-of-lag/

That said the Hair Fair people requested people be low ARC. It is their sims and their deal and people need to respect the request period. If they said you had to wear a black windlight team uniform then you need to skin with an 8*8 black texture and don’t forget to make the eyes with the 8*8 black texture and go in “void form”.

The lag is caused by the number of avatars in the regions. There is no escape. But the owners/operators say low ARC. I even made free 1 prim wigs that can get you to ARC 21 if you can’t stand baldie ARC 1.

Nobody cared.

It is pointless to bitch about it. This is Second Life. Everyone does what they want. The only enforcement is called region banning. And only 500 fit per region so you can’t even ban them all lol. Better to just not go if it bothers you.

In the landing zone is a notecard giver with a list of all the designers participating. Get it and go to their shops instead. Sadly they did not include landmarks but at least the business names help with finding them.

June 25, 2009 at 1:13 pm

SRS BSNSS

penis skirt? penis wings? sign me up!
all you big computer e-peen wielders can suck it. i run sl on a commodore 64. fuck yeah, tapedecks!

June 25, 2009 at 1:15 pm

staceybee

Posted earlier today on another blog, but I have not tested these:

Hair Fair NorthWest

Hair Fair SouthEast

Hair Fair SouthWest

June 25, 2009 at 1:19 pm

Leeloo Ella

I went to Hairfair….i wore the no hair/no eyelashes/no shoes/no crazy primed up gear….i lagged like hell…the demo hair i tried on was grey….most people were standing around fully primmed up..one woman i saw was carrying a ROSE ffs….why should i have to remove everything and not get mad at ppl walkin round wearing every item in their IV??! i dont care if im a lag nazi…..i took the time to be considerate…so should others.

June 25, 2009 at 1:28 pm

staceybee

This might be helpful–I have not tested the SLURLS though: http://fabfree.wordpress.com/2009/06/24/hair-fair-landmarks/

June 25, 2009 at 1:44 pm

Dorra Debs

“Do those boots have some magical power that suck out IQ Points?”

I hope not! I have them, but did not wear them to hair fair…lol.

I went in with arc of 1 settings turned down and still lagged bad. Couldn’t even try on demo’s and in some cases the vendors wouldnt rezz so I couldn’t see pics of the hair. Bought all 0L demos and most 1L demos, but had try them on at home. Then go back and buy.

These fairs are ALWAYS laggy and imo they always will be.

June 25, 2009 at 1:49 pm

staceybee

*Bought all 0L demos and most 1L demos, but had try them on at home. Then go back and buy. *

That is what I did too Dorra…

I was just in and saw a neko (born in 2005 no less) full on AO, hair, tail, stupid neko attachments.

Next year, hair fair needs a website to buy the stuff from. I dont really care if I walk around Big Rock Candy Mountain, I just want to see the hair.

June 25, 2009 at 1:54 pm

Nivaya

I’ve just tried out the Snowglobe viewer at Hair Fair. WOW. That is all.

June 25, 2009 at 2:02 pm

Yenn

well I sure wouldn’t wear those Redgrave biker boots when riding a motorcycle…I really do wonder what they have to do with bikers..buckles?

June 25, 2009 at 2:03 pm

*most* enjoyable. thank you.

June 25, 2009 at 2:09 pm

Marmot

“ARC Nazis” … so true. ARC is the new pillory, the new yellow star, and everyone is pointing with fingers, and it’s getting under our skins “I have to be a good aryan resident and become pure and primless”. Heil ARC Nazis.
I saw several 7000+ ARC people at hair-fair and i applaud them.

June 25, 2009 at 2:11 pm

Ersebet

This is the funniest blog post I have read in my SL Life! Excellent writing Dancien. Why do nekos insist on being so damned primed up? Have you ever tried the Little Britain hunt with all of them running around? Ugh

Staceybee has the right idea, why not just set up a website?

June 25, 2009 at 2:15 pm

Dancien

Marmot thank you. That was simply the stupidest thing I have seen posted in regards to Second Life. You have finally usurped the Official Second Life Blog. We Salute you

June 25, 2009 at 2:28 pm

Marmot

Thank you, Dancien :-). It was not easy to come up with it but hay … I did it!!!

June 25, 2009 at 4:19 pm

Lolo

they should totally have someone going around ejecting people who refuse to take stuff of.
a couple times i was there, people were been nice in ’shouting’ across the sim, asking for people to remove things, and they got a lot of ‘iz u tha hair fair security?’ - just seemed lame, instead of them just taking shit off.

so if they refuse maybe they should be ejected so people who are repeatedly trying to get on the sim can have the chance to look around.

it’s just ignorant

June 25, 2009 at 5:06 pm

Jordan Whitt