In my twenties I have dedicated a lot of time to solve the age-old question of how to live a harmonious life in a long-term relationship with a woman. Looking back on all of it, my takeaway is this: it can be done, and you can keep the female in check with relatively little effort- but there is a heavy price to pay. Namely, you will eventually get so used to the role of the withdrawn and strict guy who has it all handled, that it will kill your inner joy and zest for life.

I have seen the whole process in excruciating detail, as my father devolved from a talented artist into a broken mess of a man, until he came down with a heart attack at the "ripe old age" of 43. Now granted, he had other issues, but the main problem was his stalemate with my mother- he figured out how to keep her in check, but in the process painted himself into a corner. He would have to appease her with the same "alpha" traits to keep her from tilting into bitch mode, but that wasn't who he really was.

As a result he hardly talked to his own kids, and I don't remember him ever speaking openly to me about anything. Nor do I really remember him being happy. He eventually spiraled down into alcoholism just to dull the pain and became a recluse in his own home.

Of course, my mother was precious little help in the matter, and just coasted along, making sure the kids properly viewed their farther as despicable and her- as a victim.

So, I'd like to take a moment to make a shout out to both of these nutcases. To my dad: you tried dude, and I don't blame ya. Hope you learned something for the next time you come around. To my mother: fuck you, bitch. You'll get what's coming to you. That is all.